Absolutely livid at husband!

Doodlewhopper

Take that anger and use it to prove him wrong. You can also use to fuel a great workout - even if it's a long walk to clear your head. Remember - he's not the boss of you. Also remember, you're body is a temple - and you are the gate-keeper. If you know what I mean. :O)

That is soooo wrong. lol

quiksandy

Prove him wrong!

This!

WinnerVictorious

He has been annoying tonight too, but I soon got a full apology after removing the TVs power cable and hiding it!

Isn't THAT considered bullying, since he's BLIND?!

wow sounds like you're just as mean as he is.

i don't understand. he's blind, but he's addicted to the TV? this does not compute.

Kellyeee2013

Inform him... tell him that you have so many cals a day and as long as what you are eating is within then it is okay. Also, you should not be feeling hungry!

Or do what I do: You make me feel like ****? GOOD-BYE. I am a hardass though.

Doodlewhopper

He has been annoying tonight too, but I soon got a full apology after removing the TVs power cable and hiding it!

Isn't THAT considered bullying, since he's BLIND?!

wow sounds like you're just as mean as he is.

i don't understand. he's blind, but he's addicted to the TV? this does not compute.

It does compute. We be tawkin TROLL here. LOL

rosiecbolton

The OP is eating well over 1100 cals and the reason she is staying hungry is that the majority of her diet consists of candy, sugar and pastries. I have a feeling that hubby just may have a legitimate point in this matter.

Agreed. Diary needs to be cleaned up and get rid of all the sugary processed foods. It's way over 1100 calories. Somethin's amiss in Denmark.

This is my original post

I take medication at night which causes a massive increase in appetite-this is the reason I gained weight in the first place. What I have been doing is having 200 cals for breakfast and lunch and then eating in the evening to use up the rest of my allowance as otherwise I cannot sleep due to hunger.

Did brilliant yesterday and saved up 700 cals for the evening, but when I reached for a bag of low cal crisps my husband started "well this is a useless diet,.....you cannot be THAT hungry...I thought you wanted to lose weight".

Perhaps I did not word this clearly but what I did is use 200 cals breakfast, 200 cals lunch and when I meant saved 700 cals for evening that was after a dinner of 400 cals. Hence my total of 1500.

This is supposed to be a support forum and I am really disappointed you have come on here and started criticizing my progress and my diet. I have lost 3lbs in 12 days and I am really proud of that.

I am so disappointed and considering quitting the forum part of this website, although I will still use the daily food tracker as I find that helpful.

jaurora2

My mother does the exact same thing! I've tried ignoring her, telling her straight up that it sets me back, everything. She says her comments are made out of concern, but even when I'm doing well she says obnoxious things. My workouts are never hard or long enough for her. What I eat is never healthy enough for her. It drives me nuts and is really discouraging to hear on a constant basis, especially when I'm working really hard to do things right this time.

What kills me is when I try to be supportive of her, and teach her what I'm doing to get healthy she ignores me or tries to make it seem like I don't know what I'm talking about. She is very overweight, has diabetes, etc. yet refuses to change her lifestyle. She thinks she is eating healthy, but is making all the classic mistakes like not eating above her BMR, or way above her TDEE, thinking that working out is more important than diet, filling up on empty calories, and never doing things in moderation. She gets offended when I don't eat the junky food she makes, then talks down about whatever I decide to make as an alternative. I tried to get her on here, but nothing.

I've finally reached a point where I have to do this, because failure isn't an option. I am FINALLY educating myself, and getting really amazing support from the community here. I'm hoping that when (see how I didn't say "if" there) I start seeing results, she'll realize that she honestly has no idea what she is talking about. For now it is all about trying to ignore her ignorance or let it motivate me to push even harder, instead of taking it to heart and giving up.

SkimFlatWhite68

I'm sorry to hear about your situation, I hope that you can sit down and have a frank discussion with your husband.

Before you do, make sure you read IN PLACE OF A ROADMAP. You will be surprised at how much you CAN eat and lose weight.

Also http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/680246-tdee-bmr-what-they-are-and-what-to-do-with-them and similar posts/threads under the EAT MORE TO WEIGH LESS group. There are some great posts under this group.

Chose protein with every meal, which will make you feel full. Eat plenty of veggies as well and even have a protein shake after dinner if you are still hungry.

Make a plan. Plan the week ahead. Then sit down and explain to your husband that you need his support and not criticism. If he asks questions, you will have the answers.

Good luck! Don't give up - feed your body and you will succeed!

rosiecbolton

At the moment I am achieving the portion control aspect of this diet, but not the healthy food aspect. However I am new to this and proud of the progress I have made in 12 days.

My husband is a nice guy (most of the time) who has real difficulty with communication. He was probably trying to help but just did it the wrong way.

Doodlewhopper

At the moment I am achieving the portion control aspect of this diet, but not the healthy food aspect. However I am new to this and proud of the progress I have made in 12 days.

My husband is a nice guy (most of the time) who has real difficulty with communication. He was probably trying to help but just did it the wrong way.

I suggest you subscribe to a few porn channels and you wont have to worry about your insufferable hubby! LOL

joannaorgovan

The OP is eating well over 1100 cals and the reason she is staying hungry is that the majority of her diet consists of candy, sugar and pastries. I have a feeling that hubby just may have a legitimate point in this matter.

Agreed. Diary needs to be cleaned up and get rid of all the sugary processed foods. It's way over 1100 calories. Somethin's amiss in Denmark.

This is my original post

I take medication at night which causes a massive increase in appetite-this is the reason I gained weight in the first place. What I have been doing is having 200 cals for breakfast and lunch and then eating in the evening to use up the rest of my allowance as otherwise I cannot sleep due to hunger.

Did brilliant yesterday and saved up 700 cals for the evening, but when I reached for a bag of low cal crisps my husband started "well this is a useless diet,.....you cannot be THAT hungry...I thought you wanted to lose weight".

Perhaps I did not word this clearly but what I did is use 200 cals breakfast, 200 cals lunch and when I meant saved 700 cals for evening that was after a dinner of 400 cals. Hence my total of 1500.

This is supposed to be a support forum and I am really disappointed you have come on here and started criticizing my progress and my diet. I have lost 3lbs in 12 days and I am really proud of that.

I am so disappointed and considering quitting the forum part of this website, although I will still use the daily food tracker as I find that helpful.

It's great that you've lost weight, don't get me wrong!!! But if you want to help curb your hunger better and not give your husband something to comment about, the best way is to clean up your diet, eat more protein, fruits and veggies, not by hiding the tv cord.

fit4lifeUcan2

At the moment I am achieving the portion control aspect of this diet, but not the healthy food aspect. However I am new to this and proud of the progress I have made in 12 days.

My husband is a nice guy (most of the time) who has real difficulty with communication. He was probably trying to help but just did it the wrong way.

I suggest you subscribe to a few porn channels and you wont have to worry about your insufferable hubby! LOL

:laugh: Do they have a narrator in the background saying "now he puts his ***** in her ***** lol Sorry but you just cracked me up imagining a blind guy trying to figure out what the heck was going on. I'm sorry this shouldn't be funny but it is. :blushing:

Doodlewhopper

At the moment I am achieving the portion control aspect of this diet, but not the healthy food aspect. However I am new to this and proud of the progress I have made in 12 days.

My husband is a nice guy (most of the time) who has real difficulty with communication. He was probably trying to help but just did it the wrong way.

I suggest you subscribe to a few porn channels and you wont have to worry about your insufferable hubby! LOL

:laugh: Do they have a narrator in the background saying "now he puts his ***** in her ***** lol Sorry but you just cracked me up imagining a blind guy trying to figure out what the heck was going on. I'm sorry this shouldn't be funny but it is. :blushing:

http://www.jokes.com/funny-animal-jokes/bka7yq/walks-into-a-bar----seeing-eye-dog

heroyalslimness

At the moment I am achieving the portion control aspect of this diet, but not the healthy food aspect. However I am new to this and proud of the progress I have made in 12 days.

Congrats on the weight loss! and for perseverance~
And that is how it starts--- you take one aspect--and achieve success with that --ad then you move on to the next.

RARELY does anybody quit bad food habits..cold turkey--pun somewhat intended.
As you articulated --it's a process--and you are on that-path. NOBODY started out totally in optimum health or they would not be here. EVERYBODY had to learn along the way and those whining about sugar intake and the like--had to gear up to put it down themselves.

WITH YOUR HUBBY--Communication is not just about food--I dunno--maybe this is an opportunity to have a wider dialogue about what it is you need from each other. Maybe he needs to be included on your thought process--so he is better informed
and maybe you need to tell him directly the best way to support you. And do you know what that is? What does the kind of support you need from him look like? And to do it in a way --where you both are being heard and both are really listening


As for the forum--:huh:
Ignore the dissenters....

MizTerry

Tell him to set up an account and try to stay under the calorie goal this system sets. I'll bet he'd sing a different tune, because if he's like my husband, he couldn't do it.

Come talk to us, we'll keep you motivated.

GrEyedRose

When people question what I'm eating, I ask them, "So how many calories have I eaten so far today and what is my calorie goal?"

OOOOO, I am using this if I am ever questioned. The hubby doesn't because we are both in it together but other people do from time to time. This is GOLDEN!!!!

ladyrider55

In his eyes he's just trying to help you out. In a nice way tell him you know what you're doing. And if it's hard to talk to him about this (tears are aflowin) write him a letter explaining why he's hurting you & tell him to read it when you're not around. We women are totally emotional when it comes to changing our life styles to better ourselves especially in the weight dept. People think they mean well but it still hurts. Good Luck

LiftAllThePizzas

I didn't read through the entire thread to see if this was mentioned, but in general men are problem solvers who value their accomplishments, and women are moral supporters who value their relationships. The fact that men and women don't know this about themselves or each other tends to cause lots of problems in relationships.

So, in general, if you have a problem and want a solution, tell a guy about your problem. If you want sympathy, tell a woman. (Yes I know these are generalizations and there are plenty of exceptions.)

It's interesting that everyone jumps all over the guy and says he is insensitive, etc. But whether or not you realize it, (again in general) when a woman tells her husband about a problem she has, from the guy's perspective she has made it his responsibility to solve that problem.

How do you solve being overweight? By eating less. Since he doesn't have direct control of your arms the closest he can do to solve the problem is tell you to eat less, which he did. Nobody should be surprised at the result.

BTW, it is just as valid (or ignorant) to say that if a woman tells her husband about a problem and then gets mad at him for trying to solve it, it is the woman who is being insensitive.

imthejenjen

my fiance will sometimes do this and he really does think he is helping or encouraging me. Guys think a lot differently. When he does this, I get pissed, but I put him in his place. I will lose the weight when I want to and HOW i want to...if he doesnt like it, he can kick rocks!! Stay strong, do not let him get to you. As long as you know you are doing what you are supposed to be doing, then ALL IS WELL!!!!!! Don't let him ruin your determination and motivation!!!!!! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

DucklingtoSwan

I have looked straight at my husband and told him, "You are not ALLOWED to say anything about my food, my diet or my weight. Period. If I want your opinion, I will ask. THAT is the way you can help me. Anything else will be considered cruel and abusive and I will respond as such." It has more or less worked.