Co-Workers trying to sabotage me
Iceman420
Posts: 195
Ever since I started this weight loss attempt on Jan 1st, my co-workers have been trying to sabotage it. They started out with normal teasing, which I'm fine with. Nothing wrong with a few jokes for motivation, and I give them plenty of crap in return. But lately they have been watching everything I eat at lunch, and talking about how good/bad my meals are. They are also offering me food and soda, hoping I break my diet.
I know they are just goofing off, but it's really getting on my nerves. I don't want to get TOO angry with them because they are (usually) a good group of co-workers. Don't want to drive them away and risk losing my job. Does anyone know how to POLITELY handle this? Also, is anyone else having this problem at work?
I know they are just goofing off, but it's really getting on my nerves. I don't want to get TOO angry with them because they are (usually) a good group of co-workers. Don't want to drive them away and risk losing my job. Does anyone know how to POLITELY handle this? Also, is anyone else having this problem at work?
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**it happens. People react when you make any kind of change. It could be for so many reasons, none of them very good or helpful. My advice...Don't let it bother you! You've decided to make a big change and if they wanna be turds, let 'em! Keep up the good work!0
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I do not work outside the home so I don't really run into this type of thing in the work place... I DID run into it at my grandmother's today. Once my grandmother found out that my sister and I were on a diet... The only thing she wanted to talk about was all the foods we were allowed to have... but loved... and missed. Although I think she was just chatty... and did not mean anything malicious by it... after a few minutes I was over it. I'm a pretty blunt person (I do try to sugar coat things but doesn't always work)... so I simply told her, "Grandma... Shhhhhhh... I don't want to talk about it. It's bad for my motivation. Mission Support Bree.. Sorry, but you fail."... She laughed at me but I think she caught the "hint" because the subject quickly changed... Then I got to hear all about how I wasn't dressed warm enough LOL Always something.
I will admit that I tried to get my message across in a joking manner... My grandmother is a sensitive person. If it continues, I'll up the meanness. Or perhaps upping the bluntness is a better term. I have to get my point across (since I can't avoid her).. I feel that it is crucial to my success. I'm a sarcastic person by nature... but if I try hard enough... I can be polite and blunt at the same time. IMO, that's probably what is needed.
Good luck with this issue at work... and definitely good luck with your goals.. YOU GOT THIS!!!!!!!0 -
"Hey man, I am all for joking around, but I am trying to save my life here. Could you please knock it off"0
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Can you have your lunch elsewhere?0
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How about..."hey guys, cut me some slack. This is hard enough without the commentary."0
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Maybe they would like to join? Misery loves company, so I suppose they may be admiring your attitude and commitment and wish they had the same self-control. Maybe they just need a nudge to start their own healthy lifestyle change?
OR... find new lunch buddies, don't let them stand in your way!!1 -
How about..."hey guys, cut me some slack. This is hard enough without the commentary."
^^This
Another thing is you might want to keep in the back of your mind.... some of them might be jealous of your strength and would rather see you fail just so they can feel better about their own pitiful failed attempts at something that would change their lives.
Don't fault them for their weaknesses, rise above!0 -
I have to deal with this daily. They watch what I eat, tell me I need to stop dieting, that I look anorexic, and old. It happens daily. The first couple of times, I stood up and said "I smell jealousy." They have continued it, so I am no longer eating with them. People that do not want to change make the worst comments. They are jealous, and unmotivated. They are also heavy. I go somewhere else to eat, or I go out of the office now. Can not handle that on a daily basis.0
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You pretty much just have to let it roll off you like water on a duck's back. People are gonna pick; it's just how they are.
In my case, I don't advertise loudly I am trying to lose weight; I tell my few good friends, but that is it. People see that instead of having oreos for morning break, I am having a container of yogurt and a piece of fruit. They politely ask if I am trying to lose weight; I say yes; They nod politely and leave me alone. My co-worker, however, announces to the whole breakroom she has X points left for the day and how she can't have ANY fattening food, because it will derail her. So, that just makes people pick on her more.0 -
Ex-Lax brownies. That will show them!0
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I hve been there so I relate to that. How I handle it is hold my head up high and show them my confidence. they hate it and it drives them crazy. as long as they know it bothers you, that it what feeds them. they probably are unhappy with thereself and have some other insecurity issue.
perhaps pick something to tease them about and give them a taste of their own medicine. say something like Gee I'm so sorry my weight offends you but I am confident with who I am so apparently the problem lies with you. what insecurity issue can I help you with.1 -
I think you already figured it out - POLITELY tell them.
Is there a 'ring-leader' that does most of it? Maybe start by taking them aside and letting them know how you feel. And of course all the same ol' rules apply as if you were talking to a friend/loved one - use words like "I feel" instead of accusatory "you do this" etc.. 0 -
people are just getting in your business. I just don't say anything and there is only one person that sees I lost weight. In the past all the others used to get on me for being fat. Now they are all fat and i'm laughing. biotches!0
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Not with co-workers but with a specific friend of mine. No matter how many times I tell her that I am eating healthier, trying to lose the couple pounds I gained during the holidays, and don't want to dine out - she'll call me up and ask if I want to go to lunch/dinner or if I am with her a couple of times we've stopped at the grocery store and asks if I want cupcakes and or ice cream. It's never ending. -.- I've learned to say no thank you time and time again because no matter how many times I try to explain, she just doesn't get it.0
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Nobody can sabotage you without your consent.
Some people will be fiercely supportive of you and others will be jealous @$$holes. Just keep on keeping on and try to block out those negative people and influences. You can do this and you ARE doing this.0 -
How about..."hey guys, cut me some slack. This is hard enough without the commentary."
^^This
Another thing is you might want to keep in the back of your mind.... some of them might be jealous of your strength and would rather see you fail just so they can feel better about their own pitiful failed attempts at something that would change their lives.
Don't fault them for their weaknesses, rise above!
Absolutely agree they are jealous you are trying to make a positive change that they probably don't have the balls to do!
They don't want to see you suceed, because making you fail is easier then them making a positive change for themselves.
You need to rise above them, agree with Rhonnie, you need to target the ringleader, if that gets you nowhere I would avoid them, unless you want to take it further, i.e. HR.
I know it seems like a small matter to some people but an organisation should NOT be fostering an unhealthy attitude towards health. They should promote and support you in your journey as it's beneficial to their bottom line and I would hope your current organisation sees it this way. Confide in someone you trust within your organisation who is aware of your organisation's culture and ask them for advice if talking to the ringleader and co leads nowhere.
I am sorry you are being treated this way. I would never discourage anyone who is actively trying to change their life for the better, in fact it's my job within my organisation to motivate people such as yourself *hence my passion here* & it’s hard to motivate middle age men so if I learnt others were discouraging I would do something about it quick smart!
Good luck with your journey!0 -
How about..."hey guys, cut me some slack. This is hard enough without the commentary."
↑↑This↑↑
It seems like you get along well. They probably don't understand why those actions are any different than the gentle ribbing. It sucks to have to admit that you are phased by them, but you are. If they are the friendly people they sound like, then they'll get it and move on. If not, you'll know they are jerks and that makes it easier to ignore.
Best of luck!0 -
Wow...some people can go so low to try to hurt others or see them fail. Just hold your head high, Hon. I remember the first time I ever did a diet, I was doing awesome, but then I noticed that my now ex would always come home and say, "Hey, are you still on your diet?" That's it...that's all he could get out after a night of drinking. I found out that all his buddies at his work had a bet going on how soon I would fail the diet. These were all guys I've known for quite a while. It hurt me, so I went back into depressive eating. They won... But now, all I'm saying is 'To hell with everyone else!' I know that I am strong enough to overcome my eating/weight problem. I know you are as well...I've seen your progress and your posts. You are dedicated to this. Stay strong and prove them wrong!0
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You are doing awesome! They are taking notice, and the positive changes in you are rocking their boats. Keep doing what you are doing. How close in proximity are you--do you share a cubicle? ride in a work vehicle or car pool? work together on projects? My co-workers have not been very supportive, but they haven't tried to sabatoge me either. How is the power-differential? Are you a suprevisor, or are any of them? You might have to put an invisible bubble around you and let it ping off. They will tire of it eventually. But stay true to yourself. Do not quit before you reach your goal..then set a new goal of maintaining. A goal is a wish with a plan--Plan for success. And really, you can't control their thoughts, words, or deeds. Only yours. Goodl luck, and congratulations on your decisoin and progress!!! : 0
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Thanks for the replies everyone. We all work in the same warehouse department, so I really can't get away from them. I will politely tell them to back off 0
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they are nasty, mean people, and you deserve better, do this for yourself, screw them!0
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Ignore them. The novelty of having something new to jibe someone about will wear off when they don't get a reaction.0
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Yeh, I agree with a lot of people here. Are you closer to any of them? Maybe take one aside and say "Hey man, I know we joke around here and it make work fun, but I am serious about losing weight and being healthy and I need all the support i can get, please knock it off". Soemthing like that. Maybe send it in an email?0
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Tell them they better be nice or your MFP friend will come beat em up
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BTW. congrats on being healthier. 1 month in, many more to go keep it up!! 0
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It's just how guys are...
Turn it around and discuss their foods, tell them once you've got your weight down you might tuck into one of their lunches as without moobs you're worried you won't fit in etc.
If you just take it they'll keep doing it...0 -
"Hey man, I am all for joking around, but I am trying to save my life here. Could you please knock it off"
I like this one. Its not nasty and to the point. Just say it with a friendly but serious attitude otherwise they might just take it as a joke.0 -
Some people here great stuff u can say to them to get them to stop but if it doesn't work. Try ignoring it and telling urself that your success will be the best revenge.0
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this has been happening to me alot lately, i almost wish i would have just kept my mouth shut about my goals. Now everyone is a nutritionsit and personal trainer full of awful advice. But i wont let it discourage me. Ill let the lbs i drop do all the talking, you shoudl do the same. Good luck0
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