Over 40 lbs. gone but frustrated

arlenem1974

I’m 38 years old 5’1”. My heaviest was 202. When I started on here last September I was 190. Now I’m 149.6. I actually thought by now people who hadn’t seen me since before I started on here would notice my weight loss. One of my aunts came over for a visit on the weekend with one of here daughters. Not one of them even noticed. I have lost over 8 inches in both my waste and hips. I can wear my profile shorts over my pants I wear now and have some room to spare. Does anyone else have this problem or am I the only one?

MyChocolateDiet

Maybe they noticed but are afraid to say anything. Have you seen the threads here of all the stupid things people say? Maybe you're one of the lucky ones to have tactful relatives.

jjmnet

Congratulations on your success!!! You should feel so proud at what you have achieved!!!!!
On another note, it could be a few things:
1) maybe they didn't take notice at how much you weighed over a year ago and didn't see you as a person who was struggling with their weight, maybe they just saw you for you.
2) maybe you intimidated them with your awesome new attitude and matching body and they just starred in awe!
3) maybe they are jealous and just silently sat there wondering how you accomplished your weight loss.
4) maybe they know you look great and just didn't want to approach you about your weight in case you were sensitive about it before.
Either way be proud of the new you!!!

xLovelyx87

Trust me I know how you feel, I've lost 32 pounds and no one has said anything but I think their not trying to bring it up cause they feel like it may be rude but as long as you feel great don't worry they'll bring it up :-)

Charmainedelaney

Yip I agree - congrats on the weight loss & dont let the lack of praise affect you. You KNOW you have this so enjoy it!.

futrformrfatty

you're doing great!, try not to get too hung up on it. Sometimes I think people aren't sure what to say, or if they should say anything at all. Keep up the good work and be proud!

vbisnath

You need to be proud of yourself. Since I've started dieting I have gained weight. The harder I try, the harder the craving to go on binges comes on. Does anyone have any thing that will help me get my eating back under control and find foods that actually take away hunger?

futrformrfatty

You need to be proud of yourself. Since I've started dieting I have gained weight. The harder I try, the harder the craving to go on binges comes on. Does anyone have any thing that will help me get my eating back under control and find foods that actually take away hunger?

For me, I think not depriving yourself of things is key. For instance tonight I saw a donut in quik trip that looked soo good. Is it good for me, of course not. I got it anyway and I took a few bites of it and gave the rest to my bf. As long as you are trying to eat well most of the time, giving into those little cravings is okay, as long as it's in moderation and it can fit into your cc that day. I feel like, if i don't let myself have those little treats now and then, I would want it so bad that I would just wind up binging on sweets, which would be worse.

Also, remember to take it one day at a time! You slip up? that's perfectly okay. Tomorrow is a new beginning. Good luck!

cheshire29

They probably just don't know what to say. My own mom has said nothing and it is quite annoying.

vbisnath

Thanks! I needed that reminder that I should take it one step at a time.

RekindledRose

Hey, I lost 50 pounds. And my mom who is Asian said in front of all her Asian friends "You're getting wrinkles. And you need to lose weight. You know it's not too late for you if you start now." While making me a plate full of sticky rice, coconut mango dessert, and batter-covered fried chicken.

I was stunned. WTF?! I lost 50 pounds! Hello? And what are you putting on my dang plate?!

Then when I only ate the stuff I'm supposed to eat she asked me if I was sick and then told me it's not polite to not eat the food people made for you. I felt like pointing out that SHE made me my plate, and she should eat it, but it wasn't worth arguing with her. Some people.... never change.

Mentioned the time and left as politely as I could.

ninerbuff

Hey, I lost 50 pounds. And my mom who is Asian said in front of all her Asian friends "You're getting wrinkles. And you need to lose weight. You know it's not too late for you if you start now." While making me a plate full of sticky rice, coconut mango dessert, and batter-covered fried chicken.

I was stunned. WTF?! I lost 50 pounds! Hello? And what are you putting on my dang plate?!

Then when I only ate the stuff I'm supposed to eat she asked me if I was sick and then told me it's not polite to not eat the food people made for you. I felt like pointing out that SHE made me my plate, and she should eat it, but it wasn't worth arguing with her. Some people.... never change.

Mentioned the time and left as politely as I could.

MMMMMMMMMMMM sticky rice. Don't take it personally. You'll always get flak from parents when it comes to eating.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

PrimalSiren

I get this too with my husbands family, I figure it's either that they don't bother because they think I'll gain it all back or they're jealous. I know sometimes it can be hard for others to be positive about someone else when they don't feel secure about themselves.

ninerbuff

Maybe looking from another point of view here.

Some people lose weight with minimal exercise and rely almost solely on diet. SOMETIMES when done that way, even with a big weight loss, you may just resemble a smaller version of yourself. In other words, ratio of body parts didn't change. Just a thought.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

FromHereOnOut

Maybe looking from another point of view here.

Some people lose weight with minimal exercise and rely almost solely on diet. SOMETIMES when done that way, even with a big weight loss, you may just resemble a smaller version of yourself. In other words, ratio of body parts didn't change. Just a thought.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

This is interesting. Can you elaborate on this?

Thank you.

arlenem1974

thx everyone I feel better now. One of the reasons I have been able to lose the weight is because I don't crave the sweets anymore. I even eat fast food and some how I still lose. I guess I'm lucky that way. Thats what my bf tells me. When I go and visit my other aunt she will try and get me to eat everything as always and I will just do as I normally do. Tell her I will if you will. She is 74 5'2 and 95 lbs.

hparisi

Keep in mind I think that when we lose weight we still wear the same clothes we wore when we had more weight on us. So they dont see the figure so much as the clothes you wear. You have done amazing and I know you feel good about yourself. You are losing this weight for you, not them.

mrssim

I'm with you! I've lost 30ish and my husband is the only one to notice really. But to me its just an even bigger motivator for me to really get the rest of it off and push myself even harder. I feel like if everyone noticed the loss right away I might get too comfortable or lax about it.

SailorSunira

People are sometimes afraid to say something in case you aren't losing weight on purpose. I made that mistake at work one day and congratulated a coworker on losing so much weight .... turns out she had cancer and was going through chemo. Fail.

gatorginger

Maybe it had to do was what you were wearing that day, I've lost 22 pounds but certain clothes make it more noticeable then others

Hmmcglothl

This is a classic example of why it's so important to be healthy for yourself and not anyone else. Although, having that gratification of people saying "Wow! You look great!" is awesome when it happens..... it not always will. People may be jealous, afraid to bring it up or really, really unobservant. Funny though...when we gain 5 lbs they are so quick to notice and comment? ..Lose 50 and they haven't a clue!

babyblooz

Keep in mind I think that when we lose weight we still wear the same clothes we wore when we had more weight on us. So they dont see the figure so much as the clothes you wear. You have done amazing and I know you feel good about yourself. You are losing this weight for you, not them.

THIS!!! I swear, nobody said a word to me until I finally went and bought new pants. And BAM, the compliments came flooding in.

NWCountryGal

Maybe they just aren't saying anything. When someone loses weight, it can be hard for others, especially if they are heavy. I saw a movie once (yes, just a movie but it made some sense). A gal lost a lot of weight and was eating way healthy foods. She went out to lunch with her best friend who hadn't changed her lifestyle and was still very overweight. The overweight friend "did" talk about the weightloss but she was way depressed and said she felt she was losing her best-friend. I don't know sweetie but you keep doing what is good for you. We can't let others control our lives.

aditifoodie

I am experiencing exactly the same thing, and I think its coz I am still wearing my old loose clothes. So i go around telling all my relatives and friends (even the ones who havent seen me) that I have lost 20 kgs... :laugh: it makes me feel good when they say wow!!
I think I cant wait for people to notice.

NWCountryGal

This was good. I never thought of it but yes, this could be a reason as well.

People are sometimes afraid to say something in case you aren't losing weight on purpose. I made that mistake at work one day and congratulated a coworker on losing so much weight .... turns out she had cancer and was going through chemo. Fail.

arlenem1974

i'm still waring some of my old clothes but that is because they where tight on me before. The others are in a garbage bag at the second hand store. Working on my 3rd bag right now. Went from a 40 D to a 36 D. X large belt to almost able to fit into a m.

KenosFeoh

It's a risk to comment on someone's weight loss unless you know they're trying. I once said something to a co-worker, and she snapped "the diet is called divorce, and I can't recommend it." I felt about this ~ small.

vbisnath

that bra size is an amazing decrease...you will be so excited when that cup drops to a C...its just one size down, but it really matters. I know it did with me when I went from a 36 D to 36 C

vbisnath

PrimalSiren.....I also get this with my husband's family. I know that my mother in law is jealous, but I don't know why. We are around the same size if you figure in our height difference of a few inches. However, I have been slowly losing weight while she is slowly gaining. She gets jealous when anyone comments on how I look, but she wont do anything to cut back herself. I wish she would forget about being jealous and just be happy for me

vbisnath

I'm with you! I've lost 30ish and my husband is the only one to notice really. But to me its just an even bigger motivator for me to really get the rest of it off and push myself even harder. I feel like if everyone noticed the loss right away I might get too comfortable or lax about it.

I know how you must feel. My body shows weight loss very easily, unfortunately, it also packs it on fast. When I lose weight others notice, but my husband doesn't. That is even more frustrating in my opinion

Vercell

Hey, I lost 50 pounds. And my mom who is Asian said in front of all her Asian friends "You're getting wrinkles. And you need to lose weight. You know it's not too late for you if you start now." While making me a plate full of sticky rice, coconut mango dessert, and batter-covered fried chicken.

I was stunned. WTF?! I lost 50 pounds! Hello? And what are you putting on my dang plate?!

Then when I only ate the stuff I'm supposed to eat she asked me if I was sick and then told me it's not polite to not eat the food people made for you. I felt like pointing out that SHE made me my plate, and she should eat it, but it wasn't worth arguing with her. Some people.... never change.

Mentioned the time and left as politely as I could.