Being RUDE is NOT giving support!

2credneck208

don't post and stay out of the forums...problem solved

VorJoshigan

I really do not care if someone is being rude, mean or negatve, for IGNORE is my best friend at tmes.

But to those who continue to say this site is not about support and blah blah blah, the following words are copied from the myfitnesspal hom page (you know their ad to bring you in)

"MyFitnessPal is a diet and fitness community built with one purpose in mind: providing you with the tools and support you need to achieve your weight loss goals."

The word support is in their ad, full sentence is "tools and support you need to achieve your weight loss goals." And to me, just like plenty other people the tools and support I need is other people being possitive. Not just saying good job on everything, but you know being possitive and generally supportive of on another
So to whoever thinks this site is not about support, please read the cover messag.... oh an READ THE NAME OF THE SECTION THIS THREAD IS ON "Motivation and Support"

--- About this topic again, ignore them, come on the foums and rant/vent it out so you wont dwell on those losers, and once youget it out of your system, make new friends who will be supportive.

This thread is on the Motivation and Support section because it is, indeed about motivation and support, but the original thread that the OP was unhappy about was in the "general weight loss help" section. If somebody posted a public plea for help & I thought they were doing something wrong, it would be extremely unhelpful for me to NOT say something.

BTW, kudos to the OP for reconsidering her opinion.

I am aware of where her orginal thead was and where this one is, please read my words carefully. I was speaking to people who claim MyFitnessPal is not about support, hn indeed it is and they need to learn that.

I did read your words carefully. I think there is a significant difference of opinion, and I don't know if it's even possible to bridge the gap.

One group of people seems to think that support includes validating the poor (admittedly subjective) choices of others.

Another group of people seems to think that support does not include validating the poor (admittedly subjective) choices of others.

I am an adherent to the second group, and I think it seems like you are with the first group. I honestly don't know if a common ground is possible, but I am trying to understand the position of the other people in the discussion as much as possible. Did I state your position accurately? If not, please correct me.

TempoChiarisce26

I prefer rude support. The sweet, kind-hearted kind, the 'just have faith' kind, the awwwwwwwwwww <333 kind or RAH RAH cheerleader kinds of support make me angry and insulted. I need harsh, rude, almost downright insulting support. I don't deserve good job when I'm buckling under my own BS excuses. And even when I do actually do a very good job, I just want chest bumps and pats on the butt from people tackling the same kind of challenges - that know what it is like.

I find sickeningly sweet feedback lacking in information to be both hard on my patience and useless in helping me reach my goals.

So I would appreciate not being told what IS and what IS NOT allowed to be considered support for myself, and that others just take the support they prefer and ignore the stuff that is for the rest of us.

You cannot expect strangers on the internet in a public forum to read your mind ahead of time and correctly guess exactly what kind of motivation you are looking for. That's just not possible.

But you can glance over the stuff that doesn't work for you and just go about your business. It is healthier than posting a message telling people that they have to be motivated and supported the same way you do. That's not very thoughtful or tolerant.

Completely agree with you! If thats what works for you...more power to you..you go girl!!

TempoChiarisce26

I really do not care if someone is being rude, mean or negatve, for IGNORE is my best friend at tmes.

But to those who continue to say this site is not about support and blah blah blah, the following words are copied from the myfitnesspal hom page (you know their ad to bring you in)

"MyFitnessPal is a diet and fitness community built with one purpose in mind: providing you with the tools and support you need to achieve your weight loss goals."

The word support is in their ad, full sentence is "tools and support you need to achieve your weight loss goals." And to me, just like plenty other people the tools and support I need is other people being possitive. Not just saying good job on everything, but you know being possitive and generally supportive of on another
So to whoever thinks this site is not about support, please read the cover messag.... oh an READ THE NAME OF THE SECTION THIS THREAD IS ON "Motivation and Support"

--- About this topic again, ignore them, come on the foums and rant/vent it out so you wont dwell on those losers, and once youget it out of your system, make new friends who will be supportive.

Thank you for that!

UKMarjie

If im not mistaken, i thought this was supposed to be a site for support and motivation? I have a topic i just posted in one of the boards and....i cant for the life of me....why when someone asks a general help question, there is always one person who feels the need to be ruse and nasty about a comment. I dont get it. I am already feeling discouraged and this did not help one bit....UGH!

i am feeling frustated at this today, too. i have wanted to join in on so many threads and enjoy reading them to try and stay upbeat and keep my motivation, but i get scared to comment b/c some people are so nasty. i finally posted a thread and someone said something completely unhelpful and i kinda just went off on them a little. over-reaction on my part, but i'm so sick of it. anyway, i agree w/ what others have said about ignoring, but trust that i know that is hard to do sometimes. it gets to u! hang in there. feel free to friend me- i love giving support and have really come to appreciate my MFP friends.

One excuse that you will hear a lot when you are getting flamed - although those clever trolls never seem to be the ones who locked out - is that the question is one they have heard before. Well here is the thing, you have not read every post ever and are not likely to scroll back through the history of all posts ever...so being new you should ask away. It is down to them to read and reply or not if they feel it is a repeat of something else. There are a few really useful posts about nutrition that are actually on the page at the top with information attached. You do need to have a pretty thick skin because people are not putting on their kid gloves no matter how rough you are feeling or how unmotivated - and to be fair - it is probably best they don't...you'll have good and bad days and you will need to learn to ride them out. You can get motivation and support but you will also find that some of the rougher ones are the ones that stay with you, give you fire in your belly or simply make you think in a different way (which in the end for people trying to change their health/fitness/eating habits is probably the best possible outcome - because if it has been going so well prior to joining we wouldn't need the support). Buck up sunshine, when you have your good days you'll be one here posting like you are a sparkly unicorn with a new set of hooves! <joke but you feel me right?

VorJoshigan

If im not mistaken, i thought this was supposed to be a site for support and motivation? I have a topic i just posted in one of the boards and....i cant for the life of me....why when someone asks a general help question, there is always one person who feels the need to be ruse and nasty about a comment. I dont get it. I am already feeling discouraged and this did not help one bit....UGH!

i am feeling frustated at this today, too. i have wanted to join in on so many threads and enjoy reading them to try and stay upbeat and keep my motivation, but i get scared to comment b/c some people are so nasty. i finally posted a thread and someone said something completely unhelpful and i kinda just went off on them a little. over-reaction on my part, but i'm so sick of it. anyway, i agree w/ what others have said about ignoring, but trust that i know that is hard to do sometimes. it gets to u! hang in there. feel free to friend me- i love giving support and have really come to appreciate my MFP friends.

One excuse that you will hear a lot when you are getting flamed - although those clever trolls never seem to be the ones who locked out - is that the question is one they have heard before. Well here is the thing, you have not read every post ever and are not likely to scroll back through the history of all posts ever...so being new you should ask away. It is down to them to read and reply or not if they feel it is a repeat of something else. There are a few really useful posts about nutrition that are actually on the page at the top with information attached. You do need to have a pretty thick skin because people are not putting on their kid gloves no matter how rough you are feeling or how unmotivated - and to be fair - it is probably best they don't...you'll have good and bad days and you will need to learn to ride them out. You can get motivation and support but you will also find that some of the rougher ones are the ones that stay with you, give you fire in your belly or simply make you think in a different way (which in the end for people trying to change their health/fitness/eating habits is probably the best possible outcome - because if it has been going so well prior to joining we wouldn't need the support). Buck up sunshine, when you have your good days you'll be one here posting like you are a sparkly unicorn with a new set of hooves! <joke but you feel me right?

One tool that you may not know about is the search function. It's definitely not great, but it beats the heck out of trying to scroll through tons of topics.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/post/new/900646-being-rude-is-not-giving-support?show=search

It's above the topic bar on every forum page.

ClaireBoe

I just joined MFP about a month ago, and just checked the boards for the first time in the past two weeks. I am really saddened by the negative, know-it-all comments.

As with all internet interactions, I take attitude of "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." I wish everyone did. I pledge to be only supportive to all MFP users.