Don't hate me because I'm losing weight.....

HollisGrant

Those lazy people are ashamed of themselves. They know they are overweight and if they worked on it, they could (and should) lose the weight, too. You are a walking example of a better way of life. But because they're lazy, they will point the finger at you instead of looking in the mirror. Ignore them. (and by the way, congrats on the weight loss!!)

Trilby16

The experience you describe is called Crabs in a Bucket. One crab tries to climb out, the others pull her back in.
Don't be bothered by them. As my mom used say, "They're just jelly of you."

pinkraynedropjacki

I get one particular person say "oh your skin & bones now" or "you don't nee to lift weights/run/lose more weight"


it annoys me..... she fat, lazy & makes an excuse for it.


So I tell her I'd rather be skin & bones & fit than fat & unfit like her.


I avoid her like the plague but sometimes she corners me.

Thank goodness I've lost so much weight & changed my look so much she does not even know it's me anymore & can walk right past me.

jayrae87

I'm the thinnest of the women in my family and have always caught **** for it. It's not quite the same, I know, because I'm sure you've been on a tough journey and deserve recognition for it, but women can be downright nasty when it comes to comparing themselves with other women. I've been guilty of it , too, as I think a lot of us have. We just need to remind ourselves that placing that sort of judgement on one another is setting ourselves up to have that same judgement placed on ourselves.
It reminds me of the episode of Girls when Jessa says, "“I’m offended by all the ‘supposed to’s.’ I don’t like women telling other women what to do, or how to do it, or when to do it.”

And congratulations on the weight loss and taking your health into your own hands! Some would feel better about themselves probably thinking you starved yourself of did drugs to lose the weight, but deep down, they're just hating on themselves for not having done it yet!! Who knows, maybe you could become someone's coach.

AllergicToExercise

Congratulations on your success, you deserve it as you've put the work in!

As for the other women, I agree that it's jealousy. The fact that someone else is doing what they know deep down they all need to do, is obviously hitting them where it hurts. It's a shame really as if there is a few of them needing to get healthier, they could all get together and join you instead of sitting back and *****ing about it.

Either way, please don't let them get you down. Carry on as you are and you never know you may eventually inspire them to do something! ;o)

patmoomur

Oh yes, this can be a widespread reaction to your weight loss. You have to work as hard sometimes at accepting these outside influences as you do at your internal influences. It is both of these that caused you to gain weight in addition to whatever other factors you are learning about your eating.
I know I will get encouragement from my sisters (like a group of girls in the office) and at times I'll get remarks about putting it back on. I'll also get huge plates of food put in front of me at family meals.
When you come down to it, it's still up to you and what goes on between your ears, in your own mind, that will make you a continued success. These girls need a role model and you can be that for them. Each of us needs to be ready to take on the challenge. If it were easy, they'd all be doing with you.
So keep you head and stay in balance with your goals daily. I'm sure they'll get used to seeing you that way and maybe if they don't, you should say back when they say they hate you, "Give me a break. It's hard work and if you decide to take this on as your goal, I'll hope that you get more encouragement than I did."
Congratulations! There's more to changing than what's on the scale, isn't there?

jennifer_417

It took me a long time and a lot of tries before I got to where I am now. And yeah, I was jealous of skinny people, because I let it make me feel bad about myself.
Thankfully, I haven't recieved any negative comments about it, and I hope I don't. But even if I do, I sort of get it, because (unfortunately), I was that person.

JenniBaby85

Those are backhanded compliments. I know it's hard to believe, but they think they are complimenting you. It will slowly stop when they get used to your new size. It's still surprising to them.

I am inclined to agree with this. That's how my family is. Congrats on you weight loss though, you SHOULD be proud. :drinker:

Zekela

Good job! You are awesome!

patmoomur

I love the reply "they're just jelly of you." Good one Mom.

sarcosis1

Yes, I have had this problem with a few so-called female friends. Since I've lost 74lbs and still losing, since they have been *****y, off with me and not inviting me to nights out. It's like they preferred it when I was overweight, miserable and unconfident. As most of my friends are male, I've had a lot of positive attitudes towards my weight loss too.

bluebear_74

I haven't had anyone tell me they hate me but the other day when i mentioned working out my friend ask me if I had a reason, like I needed one.

elyelyse

my own THERAPIST seemed to resent my weight loss!! she never said anything negative but I know her a long time, so I could tell she was thinking "i kind of hate you right now." It lasted a few weeks, I didn't take it personally... and then she started dropping pounds!

I have had friends say "ugh you are losing so much weight I hate you" but I know that's just their way of acknowledging that I am being successful at something they find difficult, I don't sense any actual negativity.

huisfi

P

People are much more comfortable being overweight when everyone else around them are the same.

2/3 of adult Americans are overweight or obese. This group acceptance of everyone being fat is now sustaining our overweight nation
[/quote]
Exactly!

Deipneus

One of the girls from the office was talking to me and said, "You know all the girls upstairs are hatin on you because you lost all this weight?" I was stunned,

Bad enough they were talking behind your back. I'm thinking of the motivation of the girl making sure you found out they were talking behind your back?

iecreamheadaches

haters gon' hate.

MrGonzo05

I've had a mix of reactions. Genuine compliments, backhanded compliments, rude comments, dismissive comments, concerns for my health, interest from people who are attempting their own transformation, and people who think I've gone too far. But let's face it. I win. LOL

Tiredofbeingfat13

well if they got up off their fat *kitten* they could achieve the same weight loss you did! don't pay attention to those silly *kitten* hoes