Online Dating: The way to go or just plain desperate?

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  • prettyclara
    prettyclara Posts: 1
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    I met my current boyfriend online; but only thing he is still on some of those sites..... :(
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,143 Member
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    I did pretty well with online dating....I met my late fiancee and my current b/f that way. Sure, I met some losers and guys only looking for sex. But I also met a lot of interesting people even if they weren't the right person for me. Having said that, it IS easier for women than men on such sites since its usually the guy that has to make the first move. But it also takes time. It took me a year before I found my b/f.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
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    If you're chatting up and possibly meeting girls from MFP, then you are already online dating. You're welcome.

    How do you like it so far?
  • Spartan_Maker
    Spartan_Maker Posts: 683 Member
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    I've never done it, but I'm pretty sure that access to the entire world through the internet will give you more choices than going to your local library or corner bar.

    Rather than rely on a service, find places online where people have similar interests to you.
  • xxnellie146xx
    xxnellie146xx Posts: 996 Member
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    I have never done the online dating thing. I have friends who have met people through various sites. From what they have said, people tend to lie, use old pics....basically just be deceitful.

    Just like anything else, it probably takes patience. You aren't going to find the right person in a week. They are crazy people in person and online :laugh:
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
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    It's fine.

    Just make sure you click the box that says:

    Looking for casual sex

    I prefer the box that says "Stalk me hard"
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
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    I met my husband online 13 years ago. We lived in different states and never would have met each other otherwise. Even way back then, I didn't think of it as a sign of desperation. I just wasn't satisfied with the guys I was meeting in "real life" situations, where it was only about initial physical attraction and sometimes beer goggles. :laugh:

    It's just another option... another way of meeting people. And it's becoming as commonplace as meeting at a bar or club. I remember watching old episodes of the Mary Tyler Moore show from the early 70s on TVLand, when meeting someone at a bar was considered scandalous and reeking of desperation. Times change.
  • taryn_09
    taryn_09 Posts: 196 Member
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    ive tried it before, met someone really awesome off POF just didnt workout though. i dont think its a bad idea though, to me its just another way for someone to meet another person. i find its hard now and days to just bump into someone you could potentially date that isnt within your group of friends.
  • taliar93
    taliar93 Posts: 111 Member
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    Hubby and I met online, we didn't meet on a dating website, we met on world of warcraft, so I don't know if that counts? but two years and still going strong. As for actual dating websites I know a few men that have tried it and they've met a lot of REALLY crazy chicks.
  • AmazonRDH
    AmazonRDH Posts: 203 Member
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    <~~~ Met hubby on Match. yesterday was our 5 year anniversary. :bigsmile: ---I did have some dates with some WTF guys
    , had many many who only wanted to try and get at my goodies, one even picked me up and tried to put me in his car (serial rapist style??? good thing I know how to kick hard in the jewels....) BUT then you find "the one." Not much different than meeting someone in a bar, you never know how they're going to be. Except you've already seen them, a lot of people don't look much like the pics they post on Match or other sites........................ :grumble:
  • Mermaidyo
    Mermaidyo Posts: 125 Member
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    I think the biggest thing is get to know the person if you choose online dating meet them asap. Why? because a person can alter who they are online but can't really in real life. :) Also someone else said catfish. lol You definitely don't want to be catfished and believe the person in the pictures is that person then meet a year later and realize wow they aren't that person. I've met a few of my exes online mostly when myspace was big hit haha. I dated them for over a year each. Things happened either way hopefully you can find your soulmate :) I found mine but definitely didn't find him online.
  • yellowsnowdrop
    yellowsnowdrop Posts: 154 Member
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    Hi there,
    So first thing I have to say is I'm probably a LOT older than you guys which kinda makes this all the more strange really. I was married in 1983 to what I thought was my 'forever' partner. Cut a long story short 20 years nearly to the day later (I got my divorce absolute on my 20th wedding anniversary) I found myself no longer married and having to move for financial reasons from my home of 20 years (just outside of London) back to the North East of England. basically I was dumped for a younger, richer model!!!!
    Some months later armed with my new computer and what now seems like a ludicrous display of 'brain melt' I joined and online dating site (didn't really have a clue!!) and there I met my new husband. we chatted online for a while (about a month) and then met. Not love at first sight (I was ssssssssssssssooooooooooooo nervous, I obviously hadn't dated in about 24 years) but we were best friends pretty quickly and 18 months later we got married.
    That was 7 years ago, and no, it hasn't been sunshine and roses all the time. We've had good times and bad like everyone but what makes it all worth it is that he's always there for me and we're still best friends. Neither of us can imagine life without the other and yes, he'd been married before as well.
    Maybe I was just one of the lucky ones who didn't get into any sticky situations.But i guess if you're thinking about it then go ahead as LONG as you're careful, consider the other sides feelings and treat others the way you would like to be treated then all will be well.
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
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    If you want to be gullible enough to pay to chat with men posing as women, sure.
  • nomesw84
    nomesw84 Posts: 101 Member
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    I met my husband to be online dating, on our wedding day the 1st June this year we will have been together 4 years :-)

    There are a lot of weird people around but as far as I'm concerned some guy I talk to for 10 mins in a bar could end up being just as weird! I found I actually got to know more about people before actually meeting them. I was under no illusion that all they were telling me was true, but anyone can lie, online or not.
  • pixtotts
    pixtotts Posts: 552 Member
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    I think its a tricky one...
    Some of the most amazing people I know I met online, in fact one of them is my dream guy! if he didn't live the other side of the country! ggrr! lol. So meeting people online I'm all for, the next step into dating I'm a little less sure of my feelings about it...

    But fact is a certain type of person will be attracted to online dating...like the same kind of person will fill in a questionnaire, the same kinds of people (a couple more options for this one) that will read this thread and reply... so if you like the idea you will tick certain boxes as will everyone else on there just like all those who don't do it will tick another set of boxes... Urgh I once knew how to explain this much better.... (its a psychology thing)...basically if you go for it you will have certain personality traits which are similar or the same...

    x
  • usernameMAMA
    usernameMAMA Posts: 681 Member
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    Catfish...

    ^^^Yes. Although, if you meet someone you like you shouldn't accept waiting years to meet them in person. I mean come on, how gullible do you have to be??
  • kristy_n0831
    kristy_n0831 Posts: 108 Member
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    I "did" the online dating thing and met the most amazing man. I wont lie and say that I didn't have to go on dates with some of the weirdest people and have to deal with some real losers.... BUT.... I did finally meet a prince and things are going well.

    This.

    I'm a fairly shy person so I went the online dating route instead of bars and such. I met A LOT of weirdos, but I also met the love of my life. :)
  • MsDover
    MsDover Posts: 395 Member
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    I met a guy I dated for 2 years on POF... great guy, but we should have just stayed friends and not gotten romantically involved. We had a ton in common, except for what our ultimate goals in life were, so I moved on....

    I decided to try one of the paid sites (Singlesnet.com) for one month. By the second day I got a message from the man who would become my husband. Oddly enough, they never should have "matched us up" because he lived in another state and normally they only match you with people closer to where you are. He was in my home state, 160 miles away, and we quickly realized we had crossed paths hundreds of times in our younger days. To top it off, we were both professional artists. We wrote back and forth, talked on the phone, and after about 6 weeks and really got a good sense of who the other person was. Of course, I checked his story to make sure he was who he said he was. He told me he was coming up to the next town over from me to visit his friend, who, as it turned out, was also someone I knew! We had dinner together, listened to some music... we saw each other again a few weeks later, this time with me driving the 160 miles to him. We knew very quickly that this was it! A year later, we were married. The odds are I never would have met him if it wasn't for that dating site.

    Is using a dating site a sign of desperation? Not these days. Both my husband and I were in our late 50's, and it isn't easy to find compatible people that are truly unattached, not damaged beyond repair, and don't have baggage the size of steamer trunks. I also have to say I met a few absolutely wonderful men through dating sites that, when we met, instantly realized were not "love" connections, but we became and remain good friends to this day and I have entire networks of new friends that I know through them. For me it's been a win/win situation.
  • TeachTheGirl
    TeachTheGirl Posts: 2,091 Member
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    I think there's enough hype about the 'dangers of online dating'. People keep perpetuating the myths that everyone must be hiding something to seek love online or that they're all 'axe-murderers'. Even just one a couple of posts ago - 'Men posing as women'. It's not as common as it's made out to be. The average person looking for love online just doesn't have the social outlets outside of work and that generally isn't a great place to find a relationship anyway (personal versus professional).

    I met my husband online...12 years ago? (Has it really been that long? Wow.) At the time, neither of us were looking for a relationship. It wasn't a dating site, it was just a forum on a website related to an old video game. We've been married 8 years this year. I wouldn't consider either of us 'desperate' just because we found each other online. He lived in the US and I lived in the UK. Without online dating, I wouldn't have the life I do now and the wonderful children I've been blessed with.

    And I don't think I'm an axe-murderer. Only time will tell?
  • Mandypt
    Mandypt Posts: 173 Member
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    Hi. I figured MFP was the place to bring up such a silly subject, because to be honest, I've met cooler girls on here than I ever have on online dating... go figure. Anyways... have any of you went the online dating route and what was it like for you? Is it the way to go or just a cry of the desperate? I've went on a few dates and it's taken me forever to meet anyone that I was remotely interested in... so it seems to not be working for me. Oh well... just curious how everyone else's experience has been. OH... and just so ya know I've tried... POF, Eharmony, and Match.

    I met my husband online.. I dated some buttheads before I got to him though lol

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