Very Down

Hi,

Soooooooo I am very down about myself and my weight. I weigh like 295 and its gross. Why can't I make the change and get motivated to shed this weight?? I need and want to lose over 100lbs......................................Any advice or tips out there???


-Kim
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Replies

  • prattiger65
    prattiger65 Posts: 1,657 Member
    Kim, there is no magic formula. You have to want to do it. It is really as simple as eat less and move more. Don't over think it. Start today by logging your food and going for a walk.
  • gatorginger
    gatorginger Posts: 947 Member
    First of all you have to want to really lose it. Second you need to consider this a lifestyle change and not a diet. Third do not deprive yourself of the foods you love just have them in moderation. I always tell myself I can have some more of that tomorrow. If you fail one day just jump right back on track the next don't give up it's achieveable
  • KarenJanine
    KarenJanine Posts: 3,497 Member
    If you really want it you can do it.

    Keep it simple - no special 'diets', no cutting out food groups, no special pills, no starvation.

    Eat a little less (aiming to lose no more than 1 to 2 lbs per week)
    Move a little more

    It will take time. There is no quick fix. But do it right in a sustainable way the weight will gradually come off.
  • Fit147
    Fit147 Posts: 209 Member
    You don't have the ability to change yesterday, only today. I try to live in the moment and make the best choices I can for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And the all important snacks. And as far as exercise goes, especially in the beginning, walking is all it takes. That is all I am doing right now and it is working. Hang in there and just do the best you for today.
  • Lulzaroonie
    Lulzaroonie Posts: 222 Member
    Big change doesn't happen over night, I have to remind myself that all the time. Even though I would like to drop another 70lbs, I know it's not going to happen in a day, or a week, or even a month. I know I have to work hard for it, and sacrifice a few of the things I love in able to feel like I can be me again.
    Don't give up, because that feeling when you first notice new changes... nothing beats it.
    You can do it, and if you want any help, or any advice, WE ARE ALL HERE for you.
  • wllwsmmr
    wllwsmmr Posts: 391 Member
    To see results, you'd have to make the effort! You're now in mfp, so make use of it!! Start by logging in EVERYTHING with calories that you eat and drink, and work on getting healthier or lower on the calorie count!
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/912920-in-place-of-a-road-map-3-2013 is a good place to start: get your numbers!! (BMR and TDEE) calculate your TDEE with sedentary activity, then set your caloric goal at TDEE - 10 to 20%! If you exercise, log it, and eat about half the calories back! (Because a lot of times, exercise calories burnt are overestimated!)
    It is ok if you cannot get everything right at the first shot! It is overwhelming when trying to change anything in life.
    Set LITTLE goals, for example today I will eat 100 calories less or today I will eat a fruit instead of a chocolate bar. Explore healthy foods because you can eat a lot more for the same amount of calories! Losing weight is not eating 100% non-processed foods and only veggies... It is about calories! So you can plan your calories and include some treats so that you don't feel deprived! But I'd say doing a few days free of processed foods can change your life! It lessens your sugar cravings and make you realise you actually don't even need that much of it anymore! The first day would be torturous but try to stay strong and get through it!! only YOU can change YOUR body so you must want it bad enough to make the sacrifices!
    If you can't go cold turkey then it is also ok, just focus on improving everyday by reducing calories/substituting something void of nutrition with something full of nutrition!

    READ THE SUCCESS STORIES HERE. There are loads of examples of people who started at your weight or heavier, and they have all changed their diet and life and now feel and look better than ever! Make friends and ask for help and support and you will get loads!
    Also, wanting to lose 100lbs is overwhelming, but what if you just focus on losing 1-2lbs a week? Think of how much they would add up!!!!

    Dieting can be flexible!!! Learn to work it best to your schedule, favorite foods etc!!!

    Lastly, there is no harm trying.. You can feel depressed and not do anything about it and stay the same size. Or you could try!! So what if you end up losing only 50lbs, YOU STILL LOST 50lbs! Focus on improving, not the overwhelming end goal!!
    Start now or you find yourself a while down the road thinking why you didn't get started and now you have more to lose and things are harder!!!

    Good luck!!!!
  • I know what it is like being that weight. I use to weigh 447 i had to have gastric bypass surgery 4 yrs ago because my health was
    deteriating. I was told if i didnt have this i would die in 6 mo. I got down to 199 and was happy to hit wonderland which is in the 100s
    but then stress so bad i ended up gaining weight i now weigh 215.
    Its been rough road for me. But i look back on how i was and dont want to go back to that weight. You need to want to really lose the
    weight. Maybe your heart says your ready but your mind says no. To help me keep on track now is i keep pics of me over weight around the house so i can see how i looked and dont want to go back that way.
    The weight came on easy and fast and losing it will take time. Ive fell off the wagon my self and had to get back on. Im taking baby steps and not beating myself up if i mess up. So my advice for you is to start slow and work up to it. you can add me as a friend and we can support each other. Ann
  • Lalasharni
    Lalasharni Posts: 353 Member
    Hiya friend, I started off at well over 250 and am now 208. It IS possible, but you have to apply. If you want to add me as a friend and make your diary available to me, I can help and support you.
    One day at a time is the answer - and the "Gross" word is banned. We are all travellers here - some of us find the journey tougher than others, but its the big picture and the ultimate goal that helps.
    Keep smiling!!
  • violinkeri
    violinkeri Posts: 212
    I say, change one thing at a time! Write down the steps, and do one a month.

    For me, January was flossing every day. Then 3 weeks later I added logging my food here. after a couple weeks, I added exercise.

    I dont know what your habits are, but you could replace soda with tea one month. Then switch an afternoon snack from chips to popcorn or better yet, fruit. Make small, healthy changes, and log them all here every single day. Measure and use serving sizes. Stick to your macros.

    Get used to the food changes, then add exercise. ANY exercise. workout vid in your living room, wii fitness, a walk around the neighborhood if you dont want to go to the gym.

    Recognize it will take a long time--and losing slowly and making lifestyle changes will last longer and be healthier than a crash diet and starving yourself.
  • mazdauk
    mazdauk Posts: 1,380 Member
    I find logging on here really helpful - especially if I start putting down what I want for dinner, then finding I go over so I change it to something else. That way whenI get home I'm already thinking about what I WILL have not what I MIGHT have. If I have some extra calories from exercise, I really think - it cost me sweat to get these, do I want to waste them on rubbish or have something which is also healthy/filling? And then I put the bad thing down and find the good thing.

    When you're not happy with your weight the thought of xercise can be a turn-off, especially where thee are other poeple. So start off with a bit of walking - park your car as far away from where you want to be as possible, get off a stop early, go out and walk round a park or your neighbourhood.

    Walking and exercise DVDs (only 20 mins at a time) got rid of my first 14lb (with keeping calories to target). On Monday i went to my first class for over 10 years -zumba, great fun alnd all ages and sizes present (no skinnies in pink leotards and perfect make-up!:wink: ).

    Small steps add up to big losses, but it will take time.

    Final tip - buy some cookery scales and weigh pasta, cereal etc. Its horribly easy to add a bit more, a bit more, a bit mroe until you find you're eating 2 or 3 times the "recommended" portion:noway: Good luck, we're all routing for you.
  • ChristinaR720
    ChristinaR720 Posts: 1,186
    In addition to all of the wonderful recommendations from the previous posters, I would recommend setting smaller goals for yourself, so they feel more attainable. Rather than setting your ticker to reflect your ultimate goal weight (UGW), why don't you try setting it to lose 50 lbs for now? Once you get closer to that goal (or reach it), then change it to lose another 50 lbs (or a different increment). That way, this process hopefully won't feel so overwhelming for you. If you want to keep your ticker to reflect your UGW, then make a note of your goals on your profile, or write them down somewhere.

    I have made smaller goals for myself (i.e., lose the first 10 lbs, lose 20 lbs, make it to your driver's license weight, lose 30 lbs, etc.), and doing so has helped a lot. It keeps me motivated, as I find it very exciting when I am able to reach those goals I have set for myself along the way!

    Also, I highly recommend taking progress pictures and measuring yourself as you go. It can sometimes be difficult to see realize the progress you've made, especially since the scale isn't always the best indicator of how well you truly are doing. Being able to go back to your starting pictures and measurements and do side-by-side comparisons helps a lot. I didn't do measurements, which I really regret, but I did take progress pictures, and they have helped so much!

    You can do this!!
  • valey1234
    valey1234 Posts: 29
    Lets face it we all turn to food for the wrong reasons. Only you can start looking honestly at yourself so you can make changes. there is plenty of support out here . Get some exersize something your comfortable with a simple 15 miniute walk outdoors can do wonders for your mood and your body. talk to people good luck. valey1234.
  • acrowder99
    acrowder99 Posts: 63 Member
    Take it one day at a time. Start slow, walking, even if it's just to the end of the block & back. Before you know it you'll be ready to go to the end of the street, then around the neighborhood & you'll be 10 pounds down.

    Baby steps. Eat what you would normally eat & log it (be honest to yourself). Then make a goal to cut those calories back by 20%. If you are eating 3500 make a sensible goal to cut back to 2800. Keep doing that as you are comfortable moving to the next step until you've reached a healthy diet to lose weight.

    Log your food but don't kick yourself if you don't meet your goal for the day. Just accept it and move on - tomorrow is another day.

    I have failed so many times by trying to be too strict, don't do it! Just do the best that you can & soon enough you'll find that your best gets better.

    This process will take time so just remember everyday you are not working towards your goal is another day you aren't going to lose any weight or be any healthier. So start today - healthy eating & exercise don't have to start on Monday!

    Good luck - I have felt like you have so many times before. You can break that cycle!
  • tropicpalm
    tropicpalm Posts: 39 Member
    Don't beat yourself up for the choices you have made in the past. The only day that counts is TODAY! One day at a time, make the choices that will help you reach your goal. Be clear about what your goals are. Write them down and then write down what actions you are going to take to reach them. Example: Not, "I want to lose weight", but "I will lose ten pounds in two months." Actions to support the goal: 1. Log in all food I eat for two months. 2. Replace snacking on junk food to good healthy choices. 3. Walk 30 minutes each day. You get the idea.

    Find a good diet plan you can follow. For some people, it's easier to stick to something if the choices are already made for you, for others that makes it worse. Ask yourself how much structure you need for yourself! What will work for you?

    Love yourself now! Respect yourself for deciding to make the changes you need to to be healthier. Believe me, I understand how you feel. We are all here to support you! Give yourself the best chance to succeed and you will!
  • PosterPens
    PosterPens Posts: 172 Member
    its good you feel disgusted..now you can change your life. i know its daunting... but dont let the number effect your progress!! youve already lost 9lbs which is HUGE. focus on 10lbs here, 10lbs there. it WILL come off. i joined weight watchers because i forgot HOW to eat. what a portion really is etc. ive already lost 10lbs and i still have 5 days left this month. its not a marathon, its a change in how you react to food. this is how i look at it. i still havent gotten to to gym, but i will when i am ready.

    i now LOVE logging into this site multiple times a day and logging EVERYTHING i eat. i dont hide anything anymore. im actually having fun seeing the numbers fall off AND eating the foods i love while doing it. you didnt gain all that weight in a few days, and you wont lose it in a few days either. take your time and you will see results. just dont give up and see the numbers go up instead of down. then youll be more depressed. you can do it, you just have to do it consistently and be honest with yourself.
  • ChristinaR720
    ChristinaR720 Posts: 1,186
    Well when you die from something surely obesity related you won't have to worry about it.

    Yes, let's be a complete jerk to someone who clearly is looking for support and guidance, because THAT is so helpful. I don't think coddling or encouraging unhealthy behaviors is the answer, but a little kindness and understanding goes a long way, buddy.
  • kpnestle
    kpnestle Posts: 3
    Hi Kimma ! I just joined this site one week ago. I have over 100 lb to lose ..... this is the third *(AND FINAL) time in my adult life that I will have lost that much weight. Each time it comes back is harder than the last but I've made up my mind this time that I will NOT be deterred. I hope that you will accquire that fire. The last time I lost 100 it was extreme boot camp and extreme diet. It was successful at taking the pounds off but NOT successful at sustaining it (*clearly as here I am again). This time I am making small, consistent changes to my diet , adding in daily REALISTIC exercise and most of all tracking everything. I have a spouse, a 7 year old, a full time job, lots of comunity committments but I finally realized my main commitment had to be to myself and my health!!
    I am not sure how the forum part and "friend" part of the site works but I would love for you to add me as a friend and we can support eachother on the long but IMPORTANT road ahead for us both !!!
    :happy:
    Warmly,
    Keri (KP)
  • Aello11
    Aello11 Posts: 312 Member
    you can do this, just remember you didn't gain the weight in a day, week, month or year ... it won't come off overnight either. This is your life, take it back, take control - the weight will come off and you will feel much better
  • chubby_checkers
    chubby_checkers Posts: 2,352 Member
    You have 2 options: make the changes you need to get the health/body you want, or don't. It's all up to you.

    Making small changes gradually helps: go for a walk in the evenings or eat some broccoli instead of doughnuts. Set goals for yourself and come up with a plan to achieve them. You have to want it.
  • otterish
    otterish Posts: 50 Member
    Hi,

    Soooooooo I am very down about myself and my weight. I weigh like 295 and its gross. Why can't I make the change and get motivated to shed this weight?? I need and want to lose over 100lbs......................................Any advice or tips out there???


    -Kim

    It didn't go on overnight, so it certainly won't come off that way. I agree with what one of the previous posters said about smaller goals. 100 is a big number; 10 doesn't seem so insurmountable.
    And definitely, definitely measure yourself now so you can see your progress from a source other than the scale. Scales lie!
    You can do this!
  • Fitburd
    Fitburd Posts: 92 Member
    Baby steps.... make a small change and set yourself a short term goal like no junk food for 5 days, or drink only water for a week. Don't try everything at once, it's hard and you are more likely to fall off the wagon. Once you have stuck to one goal and it becomes comfortable, introduce something else e.g. walking for 15 minutes at a brisk (for you) pace each weekday and build on it.

    Anything you decide to do has to be sustainable for you until the day you die. Focus on lifestyle changes and the result will be life changing.

    Good luck...You can do it!! xxx
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
    Because it's a huge change and you are looking at it as a huge change. You can't lose 100+ lbs overnight. You can't lose 100+ lbs in a month. You likely can't lose 100+ lbs in a year.

    But you can lose a few ounces overnight. And you can lose a pound in a week. And you can lose 5 pounds in a month. And you can lose 50 pounds in a year. And that all adds up relatively quickly when you consider how long your life is gonna be if you get and stay healthy before you develop any obesity-related health problems.

    You will make mistakes.
    You may gain some back here and there.
    You might even fall completely off the wagon for a while.

    I started four years ago at almost exactly your starting weight. I'm now at almost exactly half that.
    I have made mistakes.
    I have gained some back here and there.
    I have fallen completely off the wagon, sometimes for months at a time.

    Feel free to add me if you like. I was where you are, scared and discouraged and intimidated, and everything around me was telling me I couldn't do it without some pill or some program or some surgery. Sometimes I'm still scared and discouraged and intimidated, but I'm living, breathing proof that it can be done. This is about changing your life, about burning down the bad habits that got you here and building a new set of habits to help you get where you want and stay there. It's huge, and it's scary, and it's hard, and it's gonna take a long time. But in the end, if it's really what you want, I know you can do it, and deep down I think you know you can too. That's why you're here, right? :flowerforyou:

    EDIT: Also, when you're feeling down and discouraged, you're probably better off posting in the Motivation and Support forums, as it tends to house less people who don't understand that giving you crap is the opposite of helpful.
  • missfittin_missy
    missfittin_missy Posts: 184 Member
    one day at a time or it will frustrate you and eventually become to much, and ignore the jackwagons like the one above, avoid the negative
  • Hey Kim, I started off at 289, and I'm down 40+ pounds, but it's taken a lot of time and effort to get here. There are weeks that I don't feel motivated, and there are weeks that I just don't want to do the work--hell, there are one week around my birthday that I went absolutely bananas--but I keep plugging away because I want to change.

    You're the only one that can do this, and if you don't want it enough right now you can quit, but at some point you'll be back and kicking yourself for not doing it earlier.
  • Kimma34
    Kimma34 Posts: 66 Member
    Thanks everyone for the inspiration, advice and motivation!! It really does help!!


    -Kim
  • rjmudlax13
    rjmudlax13 Posts: 900 Member
    Just like everyone has already said: You have to actually want it. It HAS to be a lifestyle change. Don't think of it as a crash diet where you will suffer for X amount of months, then you can go back to the way it was.

    1) Use the "in place of roadmap" thread that is on the forums (I think someone already linked it). Determine all your numbers and set it in MFP. Track your food EVERY day and be honest. You are only cheating yourself if you fudge (no pun intended) the numbers.

    2) Get rid of and never have your "weakness foods" in the house...EVER. Sure, you can enjoy those foods ever once in a while, but just don't go overboard. Make yourself work for the "prize." My weakness is any kind of chips (especially Doritos). If I get one of those large bags at the grocery store (because oh it's such a great deal) I will end up eating the whole damn thing in one sitting. I just can't control myself. And don't think of it as "oh, I'm so awful, I have no self control, I am bad...blah blah blah." Think of it as just minimizing the temptation. Set up barriers for yourself. This is one of the most valuable parts of dieting. If you do nothing else, do this!

    3) Fads and gimmicks and pills don't work in the long run. It's all about eat less, exercise more. The end!
  • nm8962
    nm8962 Posts: 43 Member
    Don't give up! I started out weighing 256 pounds. The thought of losing more than 100 pounds seemed impossible. My first goal was to weigh 225 pounds. Once I reached that goal, I wanted to weigh 199 by Xmas. I didn't meet that goal until January, but I made it.. My current goal is to weigh 175 by March 25th. I currently weigh 181. I need to lose six more pounds & it's March 13th. I have decided, to cut back on my breakfast calories & increase my exercise. I may not make it by march 26th, but I am so close that I refuse to fail. For me the key is small obtainable goals. Maybe you should try this approach. Nothing stops a failure but a try. Please feel free to add me as a friend. You can do this!
  • I don't think coddling or encouraging unhealthy behaviors is the answer

    Yes you do.



    All the coddling and rainbows, and special snowflake bs never got me moving. It was when my doctor told me You will die, you will have a heart attack in the next few years, it will happen. I finally got my *kitten* in gear and got moving.

    I think if you had said what you said first plus your reply above "together" it would have come across different. I do understand what you are saying. My doctor saying something to me got me moving as well.
  • RunForChai
    RunForChai Posts: 238 Member
    One day at a time, I tell myself....just for today I'm going to eat a high protein breakfast, then I do it and record everything. Just for today I'm going to ride the stationary bike for 45 minutes [or 10 minutes, or twenty minutes]. Just for today I'm going to drink this whole container of water......break it into small steps for each day, fill your fridge with healthy, high protein food and vegies.

    Record everything. Keep a written journal if you can, just for today write one page of how you feel.

    And get some self-love
    no matter your weight you are worthy of love just as you are.
  • Alta2000
    Alta2000 Posts: 655 Member
    Kim,

    Due to the weather and lack of entry level gym in your area, I would suggest that you get a wii and start zumba or other exercises they have (may be others can help on appropriate play system). Or, you can find exercise video on youtube. Search for the Befit channel and they post new videos every week, different exercise levels. If you do not have internet at home, download the freeyoutube downloader from cnet.com at your work computer, and download the videos and then transfer them in a usb stick to your home computers. Keep healthy snack at work-I mix cheerios with some goldfish and peanuts, nuts and drink a lot of tea without sugar. If you drink soda, eliminate it. Drink plain coffee for the caffeine and switch to Poland spring sparkling water for the gas to help digest. Document on mfp ALL your food intake and try to identify what triggers a lot of food eating.