In love with relative of Deceased spouse.

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24

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  • beach_please
    beach_please Posts: 533 Member
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    Wow. That's definitely a weird situation but I think they should give it a try. Since you said the cousin was also the best friend of the husband, he probably already loves the child like his own. And bringing a brand new person in to step into the role of stepparent could be tumultuous. One of my worst fears is that, if something were to happen to me and my husband remarried, that his new wife would be a bad stepmother to my boys. And then I'd have to her.
  • runs4zen
    runs4zen Posts: 769 Member
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    Why is this even a concern? Spouse died many many years ago; it's not incest in any way; the kid will grow up and move away and then what? They should be alone because the kid may not want them together?

    Look, you love each other? It's a freak show out there dating wise. If you find a great mate, go for it.
  • Guns_N_Buns
    Guns_N_Buns Posts: 1,899 Member
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    Only if the spouse REALLY IS DEAD. You don't want a Pearl Harbor situation on your hands...
  • RainHoward
    RainHoward Posts: 1,599 Member
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    life is short and love is too hard to find. go for it.
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
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    I saw this movie.

    I forget the end, but I think it worked out.
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    6-7 years and the feelings still there?

    yeah...time has passed, they are ok....just do it.
  • plynn54
    plynn54 Posts: 912 Member
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    I have a cousin whos wife was sick and dying with cancer, her sister moved in, the wife dies...sister never moved out and is now married to my cousin. They are in their late 60's, why not
  • melsmith612
    melsmith612 Posts: 727 Member
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    Please watch the show Rescue Me and then do exactly the opposite of whatever they did in this EXACT same situation.... that's my advice. :tongue:
  • HealthWoke0ish
    HealthWoke0ish Posts: 2,078 Member
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    No right or wrong answer. But if I was in this position, I'd think if this much time had passed and feelings had grown stronger instead of dissipated, I would go for it.
  • ktrn0312
    ktrn0312 Posts: 723 Member
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    Life goes on. Nothing wrong with finding a little happiness the 2nd time around.
  • Carolyn_79
    Carolyn_79 Posts: 935 Member
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    When my mother passed away from cancer, my father ended up remarrying her sister (my aunt) and it was a hell of a lot sooner than 6-7 years. Like someone else said, life is too short to give a crap about what other people think.
  • tatd_820
    tatd_820 Posts: 573 Member
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    Yes, go for it. Love is love and sometimes you find it in the oddest of places and times.
  • xMonroeMisfit
    xMonroeMisfit Posts: 411 Member
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    you know, in some countries it is completely accepted and encouraged that if your husband dies, you marry someone in his family or his best friend.

    They say its actually the deceased persons' family/friends "duty" to take care of what you left behind.
  • Celestialfairie
    Celestialfairie Posts: 134
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    I don't think that the deceased would wish the spouse to remain alone forever. Given that it's not immediately after and the feelings seem to be true and not fueled by passion/grief/what-have-you...

    Really, you're going to get opinions of all varieties. They should just do what makes them happy.
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
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    Good for them. You don't choose who you fall in love with and life is too short not to grab hold of it.
  • FabMrFox
    FabMrFox Posts: 259 Member
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    So I guess my question would be did anything happen while the husband was still alive between the best friend/cousin? and the kid is potentially going to have fun putting a family tree together at some point in the future
  • brevislux
    brevislux Posts: 1,093 Member
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    I don't see what's stopping you.
  • dodihere
    dodihere Posts: 490
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    Who died?
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
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    Love is a strange thing.
    Why not go for it, I'm sure no one wants you to live in misery pining for what you could be having right now.

    Also what Alex said ^^^
  • wikitbikit
    wikitbikit Posts: 518 Member
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    As long as the cousin didn't murder the husband, should be ok. If the cousin did murder the husband, there is some potential for the child to get a little Hamlety I think, and that really didn't end well for anyone.

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