Suffer in Silence? When Do You Talk About Your Diet???

HMD7703

I tend to be very tight-lipped about my exercise routine and eating plans. Why? Because people will give their opinions (good and bad) without realizing that it may be offensive. Years of people asking, "WOW, what are you doing to look so good?" and I learned to just say "Eh, new lifestyle". People don't like to hear about the hard work that goes into a lifestyle change. They want easy quick fixes and they always have some get-thin-quick scheme from Dr Oz or Womans World magazine LOL..

So, yes, I suffer (not really) in silence but I smile ALL the way to the skinny jeans section of the store :drinker:

suz155

I was just thinking about that yesterday. in the beginning of myy little journey people were interested in how I was losing weight. When I mentioned good food, even chocolate when I wanted, in general, learning to eat in moderation, with an exercise plan, they stop listening. Thats one of the reasons I joined MFP, sometimes, I just need to talk (ahhh type about it) and get others feedback. Before I joined MFP, I knew I needed to stop eating like it was the last day on earth. But, someone talking about it , all the time, was a constant reminder that I was continuing to kill myself with food. I didnt want to be around them. It wasnt that I didnt want to learn, but, I just wasnt ready to take that step. Today, Im not suffering. Suffering for me, has always led to martyrdom (on my part) and failure. It feels good to eat right and exercise. It also feels good to be able to still eat sweets and not feel guilty about, because, Im eating them in moderation. I have some friends on MFP and in the "outside" world and I can share with them, when I need to. And, as always, if someone asks me how I did it, I will share with them. I just won't talk about it constantly. It works for me.

Unknown

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missjeevious

i had to stop....
i too am married to a chef. I finally realized it isn't right to put him through the BS...the whinging on about the scale, the tears, the sulks, the mixed messages.
He is a very patient man, but seriously i was getting sick of listening to myself. So i stopped talking about it.
I'm now EM2WL and and heavy lifting and i can tell you that it has had a positive impact on me and he has really noticed. He likes to see me eating 'like a normal person' and not weighing myself every day (i didn't know this bothered him but he has admitted it now that i don't do it anymore). My husband loves me, the way I am, and I think he was feeling really badly watching me beat myself up.
now we can go out to eat or eat at home and because i'm not trying to eat 1200 calories, the only thing we really talk about is quality of food- (e.g. I haven't had enough veg/protein today, can we get some meat/veg into dinner?)
I think it creates anxiety in my female friends- to be talking about weight and food choices all the time. I work with two younger girls who never discuss it, but they do lead by example and I do notice their food choices. I've decided to use them as models- I don't want other women to become as fretful over food as i allowed myself to become.
If someone asks? I'll talk all day about it!

dbrightwell1270

I will talk about my progress. I periodically put on facebook how much I've lost (sometimes how mch I've gained) and post progress pictures every now andd then. I'll also talk about my workouts if I do something really crazy or extreme. I never talk about my "diet" unless specifically asked. Even then I never say "I eat only this and that" or "I do not eat this and that." I tell people I focus on lean meats, fruits and vegetables. I avoid fast food as a result, etc. There is no food I prohibit myself from having (although I've debated eliminating Reese's Peanut Butter Cups because every time I eat one, I want to eat about 8 to more.)

TheRealParisLove

I don't talk about it. My husband knows my goals, but otherwise I keep mum about what I'm doing.

People know I'm up to something with diet and fitness plans, they see me working out everyday and eating big salads for lunch, etc. I just have learned over the years, if you want to do something don't talk about it, just do it. Most people will see you doing something good for you and will have negative warnings such as: "Just don't lose too much weight." or "I hope you don't turn into one of those body-builder women." etc. It's demoralizing to deal with those comments and can derail your efforts.

My mom is probably one of the worst at this.

Mokey41

I don't know why you need to talk about it or ban certain foods. There are no bad foods, just foods you may eat too much of. Control your portions, stay in budget and enjoy life. I don't talk about it with anyone who doesn't bring it up first or have something to contribute. It's my life and they want to hear about my food choices as much as I want to hear about the cute thing their kid did yesterday!

marsellient

Being able to discuss here is great because I need to talk about it, but people usually don't really want to hear about it, so I try to avoid the conversation. For example, the other night at a meeting (all women) a picture of me was on the screen and one of the women kept looking at it and then me. She finally asked out loud and in front of everyone how much I'd lost. I answered and then there was a chorus of "what's your secret?" When I said I was using a website to track calories and exercise, basically doing the math, not one person asked about the website, although one did ask if I was on the ubiquitous 1200/day diet, so I did manage to get in that I refuse to go low calorie. The end.
On the other hand I do have a friend who is using another website and has been very successful. We had a whole afternoon discussion recently about it, but that's rare.

doggiesnot

Why suffer? Eat right and exercise. Make it fun!

seamanny

Diet is a four letter word. I do not consider myself to be on a diet, it is a way of life.

^^^^This

For my husband and I this is a lifestyle change, not a diet. Incorporating more fruit, vegetables, whole grains and lean protein along with exercise is just what we do now. We're trying to live healthier and banning certain foods or food groups is not a realistic way to live for us.

allisonrozsa

I. Agree that it viewing it as a lifestyle change & not a diet will change the way you approach eating & the people around you. In my own life, those people who liked to talk about my weight or what I how I would look, I finally just went with bluntness and told them to stop talking about it. At first I tried to be gentle but for those that didn't get the hint that I didn't want to talk about it with them I finally just told them that if they brought it up I would change the subject. It helped me to let go of the whole process being just about weight & more about changing ky daily habits.

Athena53

Add me to the "not suffering" group. I try not to talk too much about what a pain it is that my pants are all baggy. (Not sure how much more I'll lose so I'm not investing too much in taking them all in till I'm done.) I'm doing 5:2 fasting and sometimes DH (who does the cooking) asks if I'm eating or not eating, but other than that I try not to make it a topic of conversation. My staff does know that I generally work through lunch and they can count on me disappearing to the company gym every afternoon.

Today I'm going out to lunch with co-workers on a fast day and have already chosen a very low-cal item from the on-line menu. I once went to a McCormick and Schmick's (expensive steak house) for lunch on a fast day and had a salad as an appetizer and a serving of asparagus as a main dish. My boss is a health nut and a marathon runner, another guy is a vegetarian, one woman is gluten-free, etc. so my choices aren't a big deal.

lildee55

Diet is a four letter word. I do not consider myself to be on a diet, it is a way of life.

^ this is my feelings.

ami5000psu

I talk about my weight loss and workouts with a couple of friends that I know won't get bored with it. One friend has been discussing her "diets" and exercise routines and trials with Weight Watchers for years now. I figure it's payback. Another friend helps me with lifting plans and gives me advice on more serious questions. I unload all the crazy on my boyfriend after I "gain" three pounds over two days because of water retention or TOM. Other than that I try to limit how much I talk about it around other people because I know it gets boring.

beattie1

I dont avoid talking about it if topic comes up - but zealots who talk healthy eating in every sentence do tend to get a bit boring, so I try not to over do it.

I'm with this poster. I try not to talk about it - certainly don't introduce the topic, and if it does come up, I try not to go on about it too much. I do tell anyone who seems interested about MFP & I use this site to keep myself in line and focused, I don't use friends for that.

cloud2011

I rarely talk about it. Most people haven't noticed my weight loss because it's been over a long period, and i have a long way to go. But, occasionally I will say something. I talk about it with my husband and kids. I try to enjoy what I'm eating and I have added more things (more greens and fruits) than taken away (some sweets, but I still indulge).

Lizzy622

If I was suffering then there is no way I would be silent (probably why diets don't work). I am also not DIETing. I eat what I want when I want but am more aware of portion size and what my body needs to perform at its best and of course log it all. There is no suffering and no reasaon to pout and say "oh, I can't eat that."

rowanwood

If I was suffering, I'd have to stop.

I don't really talk about it, except to people I'm close with primarily because I'm not on a "diet." I'm changing my life. Sometimes its hard to learn a new habit and I get anxious, but I'm not suffering.

Besides, I have a coworker who's always on a diet who shuffles around sniffing donuts and whining about how terrible her diet is, who never loses any weight and she sounds like an idiot to me. I have the donut and enjoy it and work out later to make up the difference.

beattie1

I don't talk about it either, since I don't consider that I'm on a "diet". I've made a healthy lifestyle change -- forever!! Diets imply that it's something short term, which most "diets" are. And then people say diets fail -- they don't. But when we go back to eating the way we did prior to the diet and gain back all the weight, WE are the ones that fail, not the diet! So this time, I'm not dieting. This is the way I will eat for the rest of my life. I don't believe in cutting out foods completely either. I've cut out some things for now, but only because alcohol and junk food are not daily "requirements" in sustaining health in my opinion.

As for what you weigh or will weigh, that's nobody's business but your own! I don't get on the scale in front of other people, and I don't watch others get on the scale, so no one needs to know the number! It's my business only. When I'm happy with the number and how I look, I will stop losing weight and maintain that weight. If someone asks how much I've lost, I will share, but otherwise, they don't need to know the number!

Agreed! Even my husband doesn't know how much I weigh, or how much I've EVER weighed! That's MY information.

bookworm_847

The only person I actually talk about it with (other than my fabulous MFP friends!) is my husband. That's only because I've learned over the years that I can't hide anything from him... he can read me like a book even when I try to keep something to myself. He's very supportive, but knows he can't answer all of my questions or give me the same kind of support someone who is also doing this can. I don't like to be braggy or whiny, so whether I'm having success or difficulties, I feel uncomfortable talking about it with most people.

mermaidme23

Thanks, folks! I was actually using “suffering” figuratively. I only meant by not talking about what you’re going through…dieting…changing eating habits…or otherwise….with your loved ones.
I appreciate the input )

megsmom2

Suffer in silence? I'm not suffering! I eat well and am enjoying my exercise. Don't pay too much attention to what other people say. Listen...but do your own thing.