DEAL BREAKERS for dating

AddieOverhaul

- Can't pay his own bills.
- Treats me disrespectfully (like verbal abuse, being completely selfish and inconsiderate).
- Isn't very smart (I get bored).
- Isn't good in bed/isn't into oral (bothin receiving AND giving)
- Alcoholic/drug addict (getting wicked drunk once in a while or smoking pot here and there is fine, and fun)

quirkytizzy

2. Atheist - Not that she HAS to be the same religion as me - I just don't want someone so arrogant as to assume that they know without a doubt that there is absolutely no chance that there is anything beyond the world we can observe. A person who believes that would probably have an extremely difficult time committing to a highly complex emotion like love, which is not scientifically explainable. (unlike lust / attraction, which is very easily explained through science).

Sorry babe - a person like that would laugh at your assertions that they couldn't commit to love.

I think they'd just have a hard time committing to YOU. :laugh:

MzCongeniality70

No job or ambition

Lives with parents

Baby mama drama

Smoker/Heavy drug user

Rambles on and on and on about themselves

Constant texter

Heavy gamer

Lack of education

Oh, the list is long....no wonder I'm single!

Oh wait, won't go down... THAT is HUGE to me! :bigsmile:

biddy81

For the women who don't like poor spelling, why does this matter in the slightest? I can see that if someone who completely butchers the English language you might be able to call their intelligence in to question but if the poor guy spells definitely definately by accident how does this make him a poor candidate to date?

I tease my poor hubby about his spelling, and he teases me about being an "English language snob." In the end, we coexist just fine. He recently put "lazagna" on the grocery list... XD

quirkytizzy

You know, I am curious to know. I'm a smoker and I totally get why non-smokers won't date us.

So that makes me wonder how non-smokers that do date us can do that? All of my lovers but one have been non-smokers. If I were to quit, I'd have a very difficult time dating a smoker.

Not that I'm not grateful for those who date smokers, but how do you do it?

pobalita

really bad teeth or gum disease

a lot of debt and/or unpaid child support.

cheaters

drug users or alcoholics

smokers

someone with less education and income than I have. Not to be snobby or to be a gold digger. I've found that when there isn't an equality, it can be offputting for many guys.

someone with tendencies to be hurtful during tough times - name calling, sarcsasm, manipulation, passive-aggressiveness

Mia_RagazzaTosta

Bad teeth.
Bad teeth.
And bad teeth.

Yes
Yes
And yes

Also you must not lie or be a thief. I'll cut ya.

LetsMakeupXtina

-low sex drive
-hates animals
-smoker
-bad hygiene
-someone who isn't willing to work and compromise in a relationship
-inability to function as an adult... aka lazy, no ambition, never wants to get out and live.
-and of course the obvious ones... dishonesty, cheating, physical/emotional abuse..

SmartAlec03211988

Must have:
- A college education or some kind of vocational training
- A job

Must not have:
- A criminal record

Must be:
- Fiscally responsible
- Physically active and maintain a healthy diet (most of the time)
- Generous

Must not:
- Smoke (around me)

mikegl1

@AmyR70

Oh wait, won't go down... THAT is HUGE to me! :bigsmile:

:laugh:

mikegl1

- lack of ambition
- drug use
- too much alcohol / can't handle their use
- financial irresponsibility
- spending my money like it was free
- psycho

Now what do I like? I don't know date me and lets see -- I like a lot about a lot of different women, personalities are fun.

theCarlton

You know, I am curious to know. I'm a smoker and I totally get why non-smokers won't date us.

So that makes me wonder how non-smokers that do date us can do that? All of my lovers but one have been non-smokers. If I were to quit, I'd have a very difficult time dating a smoker.

Not that I'm not grateful for those who date smokers, but how do you do it?

For me, as long as my partner had good oral hygiene and immediately brushed teeth and washed hands while smoking at home, I didn't have a problem with it. I'm of the "as long as I can't taste it" camp. I've always been the type to take a "smoke break" with the smokers so I could have a random break in the day, even though I've never smoked. So hanging around someone who smokes isn't a big deal. I know how to get away from being downwind.

quirkytizzy

You know, I am curious to know. I'm a smoker and I totally get why non-smokers won't date us.

So that makes me wonder how non-smokers that do date us can do that? All of my lovers but one have been non-smokers. If I were to quit, I'd have a very difficult time dating a smoker.

Not that I'm not grateful for those who date smokers, but how do you do it?

For me, as long as my partner had good oral hygiene and immediately brushed teeth and washed hands while smoking at home, I didn't have a problem with it. I'm of the "as long as I can't taste it" camp. I've always been the type to take a "smoke break" with the smokers so I could have a random break in the day, even though I've never smoked. So hanging around someone who smokes isn't a big deal. I know how to get away from being downwind.

This is a good point. I'd not considered that. Thank you!

WinnerVictorious

You know, I am curious to know. I'm a smoker and I totally get why non-smokers won't date us.

So that makes me wonder how non-smokers that do date us can do that? All of my lovers but one have been non-smokers. If I were to quit, I'd have a very difficult time dating a smoker.

Not that I'm not grateful for those who date smokers, but how do you do it?

For me, as long as my partner had good oral hygiene and immediately brushed teeth and washed hands while smoking at home, I didn't have a problem with it. I'm of the "as long as I can't taste it" camp. I've always been the type to take a "smoke break" with the smokers so I could have a random break in the day, even though I've never smoked. So hanging around someone who smokes isn't a big deal. I know how to get away from being downwind.

people who smoke a lot are completely covered with the smell of smoke. an occasional smoker i could probably tolerate. but when you are smoking 1+ packs per day, your clothes and your home and your car and pretty much everything else you smoke around, takes on the smell of smoke. when i'm in line at the post office, i can tell who smokes and who doesn't just because of the aftersmell on their clothing.

it wouldn't be a dealbreaker when dating as long as i knew she wanted to quit, but my grandad died of lung cancer from smoking and i wouldn't want to go through that again.

quirkytizzy

people who smoke a lot are completely covered with the smell of smoke. an occasional smoker i could probably tolerate. but when you are smoking 1+ packs per day, your clothes and your home and your car and pretty much everything else you smoke around, takes on the smell of smoke. when i'm in line at the post office, i can tell who smokes and who doesn't just because of the aftersmell on their clothing.

it wouldn't be a dealbreaker when dating as long as i knew she wanted to quit, but my grandad died of lung cancer from smoking and i wouldn't want to go through that again.

That is also true. I moved my smoking outside (at least at home) but can now smell just how smokey my truck is. (Where I do smoke inside of it.) It surprises me how strong it is.

I have a friend who lost his grandmother to lung cancer. He won't date a smoker, either. And I can't fault him.

RhineDHP

No job
No car
No courtesy towards others
Drugs/smoking
Mamma's boy
Non-animal lover
Not communicative
Shorter than 5'11 (sorry!)


I'm sure there's more...but for the most part that would be the main ones.

Edit: HYGIENE!!!! Someone made a post about that, poor hygiene is a definite deal breaker. I remember I had a creative writing class a couple years ago, and the room was small. This guy that came in, he NEVER showered. One time the smell was so bad that a few of us had to put something in front of our faces to prevent his foul BO from making us retch. I mean, wow, until that day, sure you've smelled some not so pleasant BO before, but man, for it to have been so bad as to almost make me GAG, blegh.....

vtmoon

lime green dress, if she owns one that is a deal breaker!

LauraJo08

There are many things I look for but one thing that is important to me..somewhat of a deal break if she:

-only sticks to the cardio machines at the gym!

Haha it's the same for me for guys. And to be completely honest, if I see a guy (uninjured) get on an elliptical, I'm instantly turned off, I can't help it.

dubgnyc513

There are many things I look for but one thing that is important to me..somewhat of a deal break if she:

-only sticks to the cardio machines at the gym!

Haha it's the same for me for guys. And to be completely honest, if I see a guy (uninjured) get on an elliptical, I'm instantly turned off, I can't help it.

Ha,, made me laugh, but lots of truth!

zaxaz

You folks who are saying "No job" are being pretty harsh. The person might have no job through no fault of their own - laid off, company went under, etc.

On the other hand, "no desire to get a job" is definitely a valid deal breaker.