I love my baby even though she destroyed me.
KatiePreacher
Posts: 15 Member
Hey there! I'm back on here after a 2 year absence. I was 200 lbs and lost 60. Looked great, felt great, got pregnant. Now the baby is 7 weeks old, I'm 185 again (bed rest), and I'm ready to get moving. I've done a few days of tracking, but I'm having a hard time meeting goals under the stress and business of the new baby. I'm also concerned about how torn up my stomach looks now. My belly looks like a saggy river map. 
..... any advice?
..... any advice? 0
Replies
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First, congrats on your new baby girl. Enjoy her! Second, you are only 7 weeks post partum. Give it some time. I've had 2 children and have been overweight since giving birth to the first, 7 years ago. Thought my tummy was toast but I was wrong and it's really suprised me. So, you will recover and your tummy will get better. Get back on track with fitness and eating well.0
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:indifferent:0
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"She destroyed me?" That's a little harsh.
It's only been 7 weeks, it will get better. And even if your stomach won't get back to the way it was, it doesn't mean you are "destroyed". You can still have a banging body.0 -
I'm 8 weeks post-partum and my belly is terrible looking also. I think "destroyed me" is really terrible phrasing, though I understand how you feel completely.
I'm within 4 lbs of my pre-pregnancy weight, but almost a full two dress sizes larger because of all the extra skin and flabbiness in my midsection.
As hard as it is to find the time to workout or cook, do it anyway. The only way to improve things is to make the changes you need to make to reshape your body.
My husband has been very helpful and babysits while I go to the gym 3-4x per week. We've worked out a schedule so that it works for both of us. I suggest you try to get on a schedule if you can. It's really hard with a newborn, but it can be done. Enlist help from friends or others that can watch baby for you.0 -
It happens to most of us women. Not even 80% of us are blessed with snap back bodies. My son is now almost 10 and my belly is still tiger striped and stretched out and I've only had just him. I've just resigned to the fact that my stomach will never be the same. I was 145 pounds on a 5'9" frame when I got pregnant and ballooned up to 205 at birth time. In fact I started bawling when they weighed me upon check in! LOL
It does get better, do give yourself some time. Start eating right and introducing excercise slowly so you don't hurt yourself. Also, if you're breast feeding you need to make sure you don't cut your calories back too far of you'll lose your milk. Honestly I didn't even try to lose weight until after I quit breastfeeding.
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Congratulations on your baby!! :flowerforyou:
Just give it time. I know you're probably exhausted and adjusting to life as a mom... so go easy on yourself! It took 9 months for your body to get to what it is today and it will take time (perhaps as much? Dare I say possibly more) to get back to "normal". It will get better. I know women who have kept their postpartum bodies for a few months... just stick to a reasonable diet (take breastfeeding into account if you are) and enjoy your daughter! She's only going to be little like this for a short time. Just give her all your love
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They say it takes 2 years after having a baby before your body truly returns to the way it was before, but that doesn't mean you can't work harder and get there sooner. Congratulations on your baby! Enjoy it. There are plenty of exercises out there too that you can use your baby for: http://www.babyzone.com/mom/moms-fitness-and-diet/exercise-with-baby-postpartum-exercises_70274. You can find lots more by googling "exercising with baby" or "postpartum exercises".0
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You should see my "right after baby" pics.... it all came off in time. Congratulations on your baby, and try not to stress this now. 0
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I'm not a woman nor am I with child but.... "she destroyed me" sounds... a bit harsh don't it?0
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Congratulations on your baby!! :flowerforyou:
Just give it time. I know you're probably exhausted and adjusting to life as a mom... so go easy on yourself! It took 9 months for your body to get to what it is today and it will take time (perhaps as much? Dare I say possibly more) to get back to "normal". It will get better. I know women who have kept their postpartum bodies for a few months... just stick to a reasonable diet (take breastfeeding into account if you are) and enjoy your daughter! She's only going to be little like this for a short time. Just give her all your love
This is pretty much what I was going to say. It takes time. Just don't try to get back to your "normal" too quickly... Your body needs high quality nourishing... Especially if you're breastfeeding.
And yeah... Destroyed is pretty harsh sounding, but it generated interest.0 -
I'm not a woman nor am I with child but.... "she destroyed me" sounds... a bit harsh don't it?
It does. Any chance you have post-partum depression?0 -
Hey there! I'm back on here after a 2 year absence. I was 200 lbs and lost 60. Looked great, felt great, got pregnant. Now the baby is 7 weeks old, I'm 185 again (bed rest), and I'm ready to get moving. I've done a few days of tracking, but I'm having a hard time meeting goals under the stress and business of the new baby. I'm also concerned about how torn up my stomach looks now. My belly looks like a saggy river map...... any advice?
Your baby didnt destroy you. Your pregnancy did. Hugs. You will make it through. Dont be too hard on yourself. Your baby is only 7wks old.
Now, on the other hand if you think you are feeling thoughts of PPD, please get help. I am here to talk if you need it. I have BTDT. You need to give yourself lots of grace. Your body took 9mths to gain and make a baby, you need to give it AT LEAST that to get back to shape.0 -
I'm not a woman nor am I with child but.... "she destroyed me" sounds... a bit harsh don't it?
I don't have kids, but I'd think if I did it be great. So what if it takes a year to lose the weight. You just created a person. That's awesome. Destroyed you? Errr...poor kid0 -
Please, please please take it easy on yourself right now.
You're a first time mom with a newborn. Right now your goals should be:
- Keeping the baby alive.
- Keeping yourself fed, as rested as possible, and sane.
That's it! Everything else is extra. I understand the feeling of your baby destroying your body -- Lord knows, my two kiddos definitely destroyed my body for a while -- but give yourself time. It took you 9 months to put on the weight; give yourself at least 9 months to take it back off. Your hormones right now are completely outta wack - give them time to get back to normal (or the new normal!), take a bit to breathe, and THEN think about weight loss. If you try to kill yourself with exercise right now, you will probably just get injured because you still have relaxin in your system.
If you can, take easy walks with the baby strapped on your chest. The fresh air and sun will do you both good, and walking is an easy way to work into the bigger stuff.
Hugs. It gets easier. I promise.0 -
This is the exact amount of money I'm willing to bet you will get more advice on how to phrase a thread title and how not to talk about your baby than you will for whatever it is you actually want advice on.
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Oh, I get it. This is the day when people only read the title, then go in a thread to insult the OP on the way the title was phrased! I was confused at first because when I actually read her comment in addition to the title, I never sensed she resented her baby.
OP~ I know it can be depressing to gain weight, even for such a wonderful purpose. You've lost the weight before, so you know what to do. You can do this.
Congrats on the new baby!0 -
By "My belly looks like a saggy river map" i'm assuming you're talking about stretch marks, ive heard that coconut oil helps reduce the visibilty of stretch marks if applied everyday.0
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Oh, I get it. This is the day when people only read the title, then go in a thread to insult the OP on the way the title was phrased! I was confused at first because when I actually read her comment in addition to the title, I never sensed she resented her baby.
OP~ I know it can be depressing to gain weight, even for such a wonderful purpose. You've lost the weight before, so you know what to do. You can do this.
Congrats on the new baby!
^^^This.
OP - just take it slow and steady, work on eating lots of lean meats and vegetables, and certainly enough calories if you are breastfeeding. Try to add little bits of activity during the day, whether it's doing some squats or pushups (or knee pushups, whatever you can do). Just consciously choosing to move 15-30 minutes of the day will make you feel strong and condition you to want to move more.
We're our own worst critics, I'm sure you're being hard on yourself. With time, persistence and some work, you will be looking pre-baby again soon.
Congrats on the new baby
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Hey there! I'm back on here after a 2 year absence. I was 200 lbs and lost 60. Looked great, felt great, got pregnant. Now the baby is 7 weeks old, I'm 185 again (bed rest), and I'm ready to get moving. I've done a few days of tracking, but I'm having a hard time meeting goals under the stress and business of the new baby. I'm also concerned about how torn up my stomach looks now. My belly looks like a saggy river map...... any advice?
I'm sorry about your stomach.....I still don't like your thread title. I am not a woman....and have never had a kid....so I can not speak from my experience but my wife broke her tailbone during delivery.......She couldn't sit right for months. It's been 6 years and it still hurts sometimes. That woman is a superhero. I would just count your blessings that you just have minor skin issues to deal with and be thankful for your beautiful baby.0 -
Please, please please take it easy on yourself right now.
You're a first time mom with a newborn. Right now your goals should be:
- Keeping the baby alive.
- Keeping yourself fed, as rested as possible, and sane.
That's it! Everything else is extra. I understand the feeling of your baby destroying your body -- Lord knows, my two kiddos definitely destroyed my body for a while -- but give yourself time. It took you 9 months to put on the weight; give yourself at least 9 months to take it back off. Your hormones right now are completely outta wack - give them time to get back to normal (or the new normal!), take a bit to breathe, and THEN think about weight loss. If you try to kill yourself with exercise right now, you will probably just get injured because you still have relaxin in your system.
If you can, take easy walks with the baby strapped on your chest. The fresh air and sun will do you both good, and walking is an easy way to work into the bigger stuff.
Hugs. It gets easier. I promise.
This. Give yourself time. Take it slow. TRY not to beat yourself up. Even if you don't have full blown depression every mother has hormone issues for the first few months.0 -
I know how you feel! I'm not a fan of my stretch marks either and it's ok to feel that way. My baby is 3 months old. I'm with most everyone else you have to start out slow. I had a c-section so I couldn't get back on my feet as fast as I wanted to. What I did at first was just carry my new baby all over the house to get myself moving. You can do it and it will get better! Having other non judgey moms for support is good too 0
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I agree with others that the title is rather harsh. I don't really think you think your child "destroyed" you.
Right now you should be focusing on taking care of your sweet baby and yourself. It's hard enough being a new mommy with out stressing over your physical appearance. You're only 27 and your body will bounce back better than you expect. For now wear a girdle. It might be uncomfortable but it will help. Clearly you know how to get back in shape since you've already done it once. Eat good healthy foods and exercise.0 -
People need to lighten up. I'm sure what the OP meant is "she destroyed my stomach," which is a totally normal feeling to have.
OP, like weese said, focus on your beautiful baby girl right now. The weight will come off, much faster than you'd imagine (YAY NURSING!)
In regards to your stomach, the stretch marks will *never* go away, but, they WILL become much less noticeable over time...almost nonexistant. Three things will help with the sagging and the stretch marks:
1. Time. Seriously....it takes a long time for things to "tighten" back up if you will. Be patient.
2. Moisturize. I use a body lotion with collagen, and it's done wonders. Don't bother with any of the "stretchmark" or "scar" removal oils and creams. They don't work. Just get a good body lotion, and remember to moisturize after you shower, paying special attention to your stomach.
3. Strength train. I *can't* stress this enough. My stomach looked the same for 3 years after giving birth. In fact, the more weight I loss, the worse it looked. Once I started moisturize, it got better, but when I started strength training (as in, lifting REALLY heavy things and putting them down), my skin really started *snapping* back into place. Of course, I also have age on my side. The younger you are, the more likely it is that, while it'll never return back to pre-baby status, your stomach will regain it's shape, and you won't have very much, if any saggy skin to deal with.
Just remember, it won't happen over night. Embrace your stretch marks. They're proof of what the human body is capable of, and they're a wonderful reminder of the beautiful little girl you brought into the world. Best of luck.0 -
She destroyed you? WTF?
You had a child what did you expect was going to happen? Your body to remain intact? Perhaps you should of thought of the consequences and the things that would change with bringing a CHILD into this world.
Now go get off your butt and fix the sh&t that is bothering you and stop saying those horrible things about someone who has NO FAULT over your body.0 -
People need to lighten up. I'm sure what the OP meant is "she destroyed my stomach," which is a totally normal feeling to have.
OP, like weese said, focus on your beautiful baby girl right now. The weight will come off, much faster than you'd imagine (YAY NURSING!)
In regards to your stomach, the stretch marks will *never* go away, but, they WILL become much less noticeable over time...almost nonexistant. Three things will help with the sagging and the stretch marks:
1. Time. Seriously....it takes a long time for things to "tighten" back up if you will. Be patient.
2. Moisturize. I use a body lotion with collagen, and it's done wonders. Don't bother with any of the "stretchmark" or "scar" removal oils and creams. They don't work. Just get a good body lotion, and remember to moisturize after you shower, paying special attention to your stomach.
3. Strength train. I *can't* stress this enough. My stomach looked the same for 3 years after giving birth. In fact, the more weight I loss, the worse it looked. Once I started moisturize, it got better, but when I started strength training (as in, lifting REALLY heavy things and putting them down), my skin really started *snapping* back into place. Of course, I also have age on my side. The younger you are, the more likely it is that, while it'll never return back to pre-baby status, your stomach will regain it's shape, and you won't have very much, if any saggy skin to deal with.
Just remember, it won't happen over night. Embrace your stretch marks. They're proof of what the human body is capable of, and they're a wonderful reminder of the beautiful little girl you brought into the world. Best of luck.
Brilliant post.0 -
I would see if they'll let you edit this title. Your body is not destroyed. Your body will be stronger. Your body has been through something magnificent.
I understand how difficult it is to wrap your brain around a post baby body. With my daughter, after she was born I was 200lbs. That was 60lbs up from where I was before I had gotten pregnant.
Take it slow, work out as you can. Get rest.0 -
Ha!
Wait till she's a teenager. THEN she'll destroy you.0 -
"She destroyed me?" That's a little harsh.
It's entirely possible that the OP's baby destroyed her.
Ask my mom.
36 hours of labor later, I was born into this world at 11lbs 1oz...
After me, four other babies just kinda fell out.0 -
Congrats on your baby.
To the rest that are so shocked about the title.
I say lighten up life is too short don't trip.:flowerforyou:0 -
I'm not a woman nor am I with child but.... "she destroyed me" sounds... a bit harsh don't it?
I don't have kids, but I'd think if I did it be great. So what if it takes a year to lose the weight. You just created a person. That's awesome. Destroyed you? Errr...poor kid
I'm sure she meant it in a light manner. I have two kids and my stomach will never look the same. It looks a bit like a wrinkled road map. I love my kids and I like to lovingly say they wrecked my tummy. I'll say it to them when their teens too.0
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