Please give me some tips on motivating my man...

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Replies

  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    give him lots and lots of sex and he will do anything for you.
  • ApexLeader
    ApexLeader Posts: 580 Member
    "do what i want or i'm leaving you" that's how my wife motivates me
  • caspergirl7
    caspergirl7 Posts: 590 Member
    Just keep doing what you're doing & he'll see how good you feel/look & maybe that will kick his butt into gear... otherwise you really can't do anything..
  • gr8pillock
    gr8pillock Posts: 374 Member
    I know someone who motivated her husband by telling him she would give him a BJ for every 10 pounds he lost. I used to see that man in the gym all the time!! He lost like 70 pounds with that incentive.

    That being said not everyone can be motivated. And if it does motivate him there is nothing to say he will stay going forward. He has to want to do it for himself and no other reason otherwise it probably won't work.

    Every ten pounds??? Jesus, she's not from my tribe. Try a blow job every morning if he behaves and takes good care of himself and works out the day before. :)
  • thisismeraw
    thisismeraw Posts: 1,264 Member
    Unfortunately there is nothing you can do to motivate him. He has to want to change himself. No one can make someone else change.

    I would just continue with what you are doing and he may get motivated based on the progress you are making.

    As others suggested, ask him to go for a walk with you. Instead of sitting at home watching TV go play gold, baseball, bowling, go for a hike, find a trail by your house if possible and go for a long walk. Where my husband and I used to live there was a long trail, than a park, than the trail continued and looped back towards our house. So, we would pack some veggies, fruits and a sandwich and walk along the trail to the park. Once we got to the park we would stop and have the food we brought (sometimes it was only water and some fruit and veggies) than we would walk back home.

    Can you have a conversation with him and just tell him that you are worried about him? Don't make it seem like you want him to lose weight or you are pressuring him.. just make him aware of your worries. It might help push him but again, he has to want it himself.
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    Try rewarding him with sexual favors. Works very well in my house. :devil:
  • mreeves261
    mreeves261 Posts: 728 Member
    I know someone who motivated her husband by telling him she would give him a BJ for every 10 pounds he lost. I used to see that man in the gym all the time!! He lost like 70 pounds with that incentive.

    That being said not everyone can be motivated. And if it does motivate him there is nothing to say he will stay going forward. He has to want to do it for himself and no other reason otherwise it probably won't work.

    Every ten pounds??? Jesus, she's not from my tribe. Try a blow job every morning if he behaves and takes good care of himself and works out the day before. :)

    Apparently she uses that as a birthday and anniversary treat thing. So I would say she's not from your tribe, lol.
  • lsapphire
    lsapphire Posts: 297 Member
    Keep a food diary (calories and such) for him. Present it at the end of a week, maybe he really doesn't realize his intake versus what it should be?:bigsmile:
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    You're already withholding meat from the guy and he won't comply.

    There's only one thing you can do.

    Withhold sex.

    Ok now that's just wrong! No reason she should punish herself too!

    I like the way you think :laugh:
  • Tymeshia
    Tymeshia Posts: 194 Member
    Ask him if he want to do the C25K training. Also,take baby steps. When I started my journey to trying to be more healthy, I started with food. Why don't you both just focus on food intake for 100 days and then tell him after the 100 day sof focusing on food you go to exercising. When I started the exercising I started with just exercising for at least 10 minutes daily and see how that works for him.
  • sarahevenstar
    sarahevenstar Posts: 70 Member
    My husband loves gadgets and is competitive so I got him a Nike Fuel band for Christmas. He loves it! He's like a little kid when he beats his old numbers or when he's ranked higher than his friends. He even vacuums the living room at night so he can gewt more points. It's absolutely win/win.
  • fpuckett2383
    fpuckett2383 Posts: 49 Member
    Wow guys! I did NOT expect so many replies! Thanks everyone for taking time out to help me out and give me some advice.
    A few points
    1) He does want to lose weight. He gets in these huge fits and decided "This is it! I'm going to do it!" Yet, when the time comes he blows it off. I already work out three days a week with a trainer, so when he's not motivated, I'm not motivated either. It's a vicious cycle. He has a horrible procrastination problem
    2) We do have very open and honest questions about my worries about his (and my) health. He's worried too!
    3) He is a forklift driver, which means a lot of sitting down and not moving. He commutes to work. Works incredibly long hours. It really does just wear him out. He refuses to work on the weekends- I can't seem to get him to budge.
    4) As for the "favors" (and I'm sure you guys were kidding ;)) But I give him w hatever he wants, not much of an insentive, lol. I can not withhold either, it's just me.
    5) I don't want him to resent me. He knows he has a problem, I just don't think he knows how big it is. I don't want to bully or trick him, I just want him to have that a-ha moment and change for the better. I DO love and accept him, I will not accept being a young widow or having kids with a guy who can't chase my kids around the yard. I deserve better and so does he.

    Thanks again guys! You gave me a lot of great information and I will put this into action. Feel free to send FR, as well :)
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    The only thing you can do is be a role model. Since I've started on this JOURNEY :love: (everyone hates that term, cept' me) my boyfriend has lost about 65lbs, eats vegetables now, walks with me at work, and is always asking about calories.

    This is going from a man who only drank dr. pepper, would never touch a vegetable not even lettuce, and put cheese on everything.

    Keep doing the hard work making the effort, unless he's some kind of stubborn A-hole, he will turn around.
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
    I know someone who motivated her husband by telling him she would give him a BJ for every 10 pounds he lost. I used to see that man in the gym all the time!! He lost like 70 pounds with that incentive.

    That being said not everyone can be motivated. And if it does motivate him there is nothing to say he will stay going forward. He has to want to do it for himself and no other reason otherwise it probably won't work.

    Your friend is being stingy. A BJ for every pound, I say! :wink: