Marriage Proposal - A question for the men out there.

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chezzielou1984
chezzielou1984 Posts: 31
in Chit-Chat
I have set myself a motivational task:
When I reach my ultimate goal of 140lb (if my partner has not popped the question) I am going to do do it.

I need the opinion of mostly men on how you would feel if your lady proposed to you?
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Replies

  • diodelcibo
    diodelcibo Posts: 2,564 Member
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    I'd run far away.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    I'd more than likely hang myself.

    But I'm not the marriage type.
  • chezzielou1984
    chezzielou1984 Posts: 31
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    I'd run far away.

    why?
  • BurtHuttz
    BurtHuttz Posts: 3,653 Member
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    It really depends on his personality. It would make me happy if I were in a relationship with someone I wanted to marry, to be asked. But if he's more traditional, or if you think he might not see the relationship the same way, then it might be advisable to let him ask. When I proposed to my wife, I was fairly certain what the answer would be.
  • ScatteredThoughts
    ScatteredThoughts Posts: 3,562 Member
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    I would have been surprised if my wife had proposed, but not really bothered by it.
  • chezzielou1984
    chezzielou1984 Posts: 31
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    It really depends on his personality. It would make me happy if I were in a relationship with someone I wanted to marry, to be asked. But if he's more traditional, or if you think he might not see the relationship the same way, then it might be advisable to let him ask. When I proposed to my wife, I was fairly certain what the answer would be.

    I think he sees the relationship the same way. We live together so its not a fling :-)
    He not very forward so I have had to make nearly every move there is to me made lol
  • Lrdoflamancha
    Lrdoflamancha Posts: 1,280 Member
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    I think he sees the relationship the same way. We live together so its not a fling :-)
    He not very forward so I have had to make nearly every move there is to me made lol
    [/quote]

    I think the above is your answer.... Go for it.
  • primal7
    primal7 Posts: 151 Member
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    Not a male, but I had one of my girls do the proposal to her now husband. At a game even! They even had a kickball game (male against female) to decide if she would take his last name.
    In this day and age, I think males and females are comfortable with having the female propose.
    If they love each other, who care who proposes! :flowerforyou:
  • _SABOTEUR_
    _SABOTEUR_ Posts: 6,833 Member
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    I have set myself a motivational task:
    When I reach my ultimate goal of 140lb (if my partner has not popped the question) I am going to do do it.

    I need the opinion of mostly men on how you would feel if your lady proposed to you?

    I am mostly man, so I can answer.

    Fwiw I think this is a strange goal. If you break up are you going to stop trying to become a healthier person? You need to lose weight for yourself, not to convince your SO to marry you.
  • catrinaHwechanged
    catrinaHwechanged Posts: 4,907 Member
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    I'm not mostly a man, but you will never get a good answer for your question here. Nobody knows the dynamic of your relationship....it is all so personal.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    I'm not mostly a man

    :noway:
  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
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    I have a lot of guy friends who I have talked to about this topic. The general consensus is the majority of guys I know don't like it. That being said there was a rare person who brought up why should it matter?

    My opinion is you know your bf better then we do. You probably have a better feel of how he'd feel about it. This isn't exactly a one size fits all question. But if you believe in statistics, I'd avoid it. From who I've talked to, they said they'd feel belittled. Not so much that they had a problem with it but that it is as if society placed it as their duty and that people would look down on them for not 'manning up' to begin with.

    I think if you want to get married...you're nuts, so do...whatever :laugh:
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
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    Are you going to ask his mother for permission first?

    Are you going to let him make the final decision on the colors for the wedding, cake, date, dinner items, guest list how many groomsmen he gets to have, etc?

    If so, then ok.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    I'd run far away.

    why?

    It doesn't matter why. Just the fact that he said that, there's your answer. Imagine if men started asking us why we do or feel most of the things we do. They don't. They just nod and accept it as one more obstacle to getting in our pants. You should view this the same way with your goal as being getting that marriage certificate. It's not manipulation. It's acceptance.
  • Railr0aderTony
    Railr0aderTony Posts: 6,803 Member
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    why wait? if he is there for you now what would be the difference? Just do not get why you need to be at goal before this happens? will something Magical happen when that number is on the scale?
  • Topsking2010
    Topsking2010 Posts: 2,245 Member
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    Being old school I think the man should propose to the woman.

    BTW your weight should not matter if he really loves you. Why wait to get married?
  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
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    why wait? if he is there for you now what would be the difference? Just do not get why you need to be at goal before this happens? will something Magical happen when that number is on the scale?
    I think it's more about confidence. Hey, at least it's not like the current story I know about...the girl set a maximum size on him (said they can't get married until he loses 50lbs for the wedding pictures) but also set a minimum size on the rock lol.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    I would want to be the one to propose, but I don't think I would be "too" bothered if my partner initiated it. That is what I'd get for dragging my feet.
  • wjewell
    wjewell Posts: 282 Member
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    I'm not a male, so I hope that you aren't annoyed by me giving my opinion..

    Some men are very traditional and still have a lot of gender roles in their heads of how things should be. If your man is the "go with the flow" kind of guy and doesn't care much about "tradition" or "conventional" things then he probably wouldn't "mind" you proposing. However, don't be offended if he feels its a little awkward or confusing. lol I don't think a lot of men expect to be proposed to. I have known of women proposing to men, and they've been married for a while and they're very happy. I don't think that it defines your relationship at all. If you don't think he is the type of man to be bothered by it, you should go for it! :)

    I asked my fiance how he would feel if i had proposed to him. He said "it'd be a bit awkward but I wouldn't be mad or weireded out."

    P.S. Good luck! :D
  • JUDDDing
    JUDDDing Posts: 1,367 Member
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    I would want to be the one to propose, but I don't think I would be "too" bothered if my partner initiated it. That is what I'd get for dragging my feet.

    I agree

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