Is it bad my daughter wants to shred?!?
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OH OK!!! so the 30 day shred is not about dieting? How stupid of me.
I guess thats why I asked.
30 day shred is about exercising.....what you consume is about dieting. Two totally separate things but when accompanied together properly will help you reach the best results possible. She just said her little girl wants to do what she is doing exercise wise. She is too young to correlate weight loss with eating and exercise so she needs to be taught that. Starting by allowing her to participate is a great first step to introduce health and nutrition to her. Plus she will be able to eat more if she likes it and exercises with mommy. The goal is to teach them it is okay to eat and that eating can lead to fat loss coupled with exercise. She is setting her daughter up to never have an ED. Very smart mommy!
I'm not so convinced by your arguments. I don't think it's a problem to let her 6 year old do 30DS, but I don't think she should being led to the idea of needing to exercise to lose fat. At six, she should understand you exercise because it's fun and because it's good for you. If she needs specifics about why it's good, I'd stick with things like it helps your muscles get strong, it helps you sleep better at night and it's good for your brain to make your blood move fast around your body by moving your body fast. I would strongly suggest leaving out all reference to exercise and fat loss at this age.
It is not an argument it is a statement. I am not trying to convince you of anything. My statement....
"The goal is to teach them it is okay to eat and that eating can lead to fat loss coupled with exercise."
is fact. Says nothing about the little girl being worried about being fat. If you choose to teach your children that you exercise because it is fun and helps your muscles get strong that is your choice. I think that leaving out the fact that it prevents you from being fat is just as important as the others. It is not okay to be fat and when ppl stop coddling children about it or hiding it from them we will be a much more healthier world. It is never too early to teach a child that fat is not okay and can lead to many health problems.
this is why so many children get eating disorders. No, I'm serious. Exercising is a good thing but teaching children to diet is very wrong. Also you have to be very careful with saying things like "exercise because then you can eat more and not get fat" or anything suggesting exercise is for weightloss or for stopping you getting fat from what you just ate.
also this child is 6 years old but seriously the kind of talk you're suggesting will lead to her feeling uncomfortable in her body.
I suggest reading the accounts of people whose eating disorder developed from how they were talked to about dieting, weightloss and fatness at home. Or reading up on the very interesting results of studies that showed that weight management and obesity prevention measures in children increased the risk of anorexia in the teens.
The issue is can a 6 year old do the 30 day shred? probably not but doing a fun dance workout with a child seems like a fun way to get her involved. The fact she's asking you about her weight is very worrying though. Have you seen the statistics for how many 9 year old girls are already on a diet?
I just posted pics of my 12 yr old son and 15 yr old daughter.....the methods I mentioned above work I have proof. Are your kids fat? Maybe you should consider that. My daughter eats like a freaking racehorse and I dont stop her. She also is very active. I taught them this. And now I am showing them that it is hard to fix so to avoid it dont get fat. My daughter said....."it is your fault you got fat mom we ate the same thing you did but you sat around and we went out...." Which is very true I gave up on life for a minute and missed out on alot of outings with them. Never again!0 -
I've spoken to her about about healthy choices etc and she knows why I'm trying to lose weight ( I had a baby 12 weeks ago and ate too much rubbish) she's adamant she just likes it because its fun :-) I'm just gonna let her do it, I'm sure it's just a phase it just worried me that it was a little too intense for her to be doing it but she does still eat all the junk normal children do (chocolate,crisps etc). I just want to set a good example to my children, I don't want them to become unhealthy in there later life due to my bad eating choices.0
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I just posted pics of my 12 yr old son and 15 yr old daughter.....the methods I mentioned above work I have proof. Are your kids fat? Maybe you should consider that. My daughter eats like a freaking racehorse and I dont stop her. She also is very active. I taught them this. And now I am showing them that it is hard to fix so to avoid it dont get fat. My daughter said....."it is your fault you got fat mom we ate the same thing you did but you sat around and we went out...." Which is very true I gave up on life for a minute and missed out on alot of outings with them. Never again!
Yes, 2 skinny kids is absolute proof that telling a 6 year old not to get fat will not cause eating and body issues later. :yawn:
Happy for you that your kids are fit, active and healthy. Does not mean your methods are right.0 -
I just posted pics of my 12 yr old son and 15 yr old daughter.....the methods I mentioned above work I have proof. Are your kids fat? Maybe you should consider that. My daughter eats like a freaking racehorse and I dont stop her. She also is very active. I taught them this. And now I am showing them that it is hard to fix so to avoid it dont get fat. My daughter said....."it is your fault you got fat mom we ate the same thing you did but you sat around and we went out...." Which is very true I gave up on life for a minute and missed out on alot of outings with them. Never again!
Yes, 2 skinny kids is absolute proof that telling a 6 year old not to get fat will not cause eating and body issues later. :yawn:
Happy for you that your kids are fit, active and healthy. Does not mean your methods are right.
*clapping*0 -
Yes, 2 skinny kids is absolute proof that telling a 6 year old not to get fat will not cause eating and body issues later. :yawn:
Happy for you that your kids are fit, active and healthy. Does not mean your methods are right.
The point is........my daughter knows that getting fat is bad. I taught her that early on. It neither scared her or gave her a complex. But then again my daughter like me doesnt beat around the bush and make excuses like most on here do. So yeah it is proof it works it worked for my 2 midgets. It certainly doesnt mean my method is wrong. Unless you have personal proof where a parent teaches a child proper health and exercise and it is followed and that kid is still fat I think you should probably stop getting offended and accept it for what it is...truth. You teach them to do the right thing and by following it you prevent future disaster. Plain and simple.0 -
I've spoken to her about about healthy choices etc and she knows why I'm trying to lose weight ( I had a baby 12 weeks ago and ate too much rubbish) she's adamant she just likes it because its fun :-) I'm just gonna let her do it, I'm sure it's just a phase it just worried me that it was a little too intense for her to be doing it but she does still eat all the junk normal children do (chocolate,crisps etc). I just want to set a good example to my children, I don't want them to become unhealthy in there later life due to my bad eating choices.
Thats great and you will reap the rewards when they grow up healthy and fit. They will thank you for it and so will your grand children Kudos to you!0 -
You might want to change your language at home, saying that you need to get fit, rather than lose weight. That' what I do to prevent my kids getting unnecessary hang-ups from my attempts to be healthier. You can tell her also that she's welcome to do it (I'd say without weights) but that she gets fit from running around and playing outside, so she doesn't need to do a special routine the way mommy does.
I think this is stellar advice.0 -
It is not an argument it is a statement. I am not trying to convince you of anything. My statement....
"The goal is to teach them it is okay to eat and that eating can lead to fat loss coupled with exercise."
is fact. Says nothing about the little girl being worried about being fat. If you choose to teach your children that you exercise because it is fun and helps your muscles get strong that is your choice. I think that leaving out the fact that it prevents you from being fat is just as important as the others. It is not okay to be fat and when ppl stop coddling children about it or hiding it from them we will be a much more healthier world. It is never too early to teach a child that fat is not okay and can lead to many health problems.
Yes, it can be too early to teach a child that fat is not okay. A child of six should have NO concerns about how fat they are or are not. Even if they were fat, I think telling them to exercise so they wouldn't be fat at age 6 is a terrible way to try and get the to do it. That's a great way to introduce poor body image complexes, eating disorders and lack of self-confidence.
There is no mention of telling the 6 yr old to exercise not to be fat so stop making the statement into something it clearly doesnt state. the above statement addresses the issue that they need to be taught it is good to eat and along with exercise can/will prevent obesity because being fat can lead to health issues. How you are getting anything else from it baffles me.It is NEVER to early to teach a child healthy eating and exercise habits and consequences to not following them. 6 is a prime age to teach them these things seeing as they will be eating mid meals at school and need to make the right decisions NOW. Not when they are in 5th grade and fat.
You say:
"There is no mention of telling the 6 yr old to exercise not to be fat so stop making the statement into something it clearly doesnt state."
Yet you say in the original post:
" I think that leaving out the fact that it prevents you from being fat is just as important as the others. It is not okay to be fat and when ppl stop coddling children about it or hiding it from them we will be a much more healthier world."
I think you're the one the turnip truck hit or whatever it is you have to say.
I know your profile says bossy, and tells it like it is, and perfect (exaggeration but implied), etc. But perhaps you're not the best to take advice from. Have you ever known anyone with an eating disorder or body image issues that kill themselves because of statements like you make? I hardly think coddling is the problem.0 -
OH OK!!! so the 30 day shred is not about dieting? How stupid of me.
I guess thats why I asked.
30 day shred is about exercising.....what you consume is about dieting. Two totally separate things but when accompanied together properly will help you reach the best results possible. She just said her little girl wants to do what she is doing exercise wise. She is too young to correlate weight loss with eating and exercise so she needs to be taught that. Starting by allowing her to participate is a great first step to introduce health and nutrition to her. Plus she will be able to eat more if she likes it and exercises with mommy. The goal is to teach them it is okay to eat and that eating can lead to fat loss coupled with exercise. She is setting her daughter up to never have an ED. Very smart mommy!
I'm not so convinced by your arguments. I don't think it's a problem to let her 6 year old do 30DS, but I don't think she should being led to the idea of needing to exercise to lose fat. At six, she should understand you exercise because it's fun and because it's good for you. If she needs specifics about why it's good, I'd stick with things like it helps your muscles get strong, it helps you sleep better at night and it's good for your brain to make your blood move fast around your body by moving your body fast. I would strongly suggest leaving out all reference to exercise and fat loss at this age.
It is not an argument it is a statement. I am not trying to convince you of anything. My statement....
"The goal is to teach them it is okay to eat and that eating can lead to fat loss coupled with exercise."
is fact. Says nothing about the little girl being worried about being fat. If you choose to teach your children that you exercise because it is fun and helps your muscles get strong that is your choice. I think that leaving out the fact that it prevents you from being fat is just as important as the others. It is not okay to be fat and when ppl stop coddling children about it or hiding it from them we will be a much more healthier world. It is never too early to teach a child that fat is not okay and can lead to many health problems.
this is why so many children get eating disorders. No, I'm serious. Exercising is a good thing but teaching children to diet is very wrong. Also you have to be very careful with saying things like "exercise because then you can eat more and not get fat" or anything suggesting exercise is for weightloss or for stopping you getting fat from what you just ate.
also this child is 6 years old but seriously the kind of talk you're suggesting will lead to her feeling uncomfortable in her body.
I suggest reading the accounts of people whose eating disorder developed from how they were talked to about dieting, weightloss and fatness at home. Or reading up on the very interesting results of studies that showed that weight management and obesity prevention measures in children increased the risk of anorexia in the teens.
The issue is can a 6 year old do the 30 day shred? probably not but doing a fun dance workout with a child seems like a fun way to get her involved. The fact she's asking you about her weight is very worrying though. Have you seen the statistics for how many 9 year old girls are already on a diet?
I just posted pics of my 12 yr old son and 15 yr old daughter.....the methods I mentioned above work I have proof. Are your kids fat? Maybe you should consider that. My daughter eats like a freaking racehorse and I dont stop her. She also is very active. I taught them this. And now I am showing them that it is hard to fix so to avoid it dont get fat. My daughter said....."it is your fault you got fat mom we ate the same thing you did but you sat around and we went out...." Which is very true I gave up on life for a minute and missed out on alot of outings with them. Never again!
no I do not have fat children. Well, I have an 8 month old who has cute chubby cheeks. You probably assume that I grew up in a fat and lazy family with poor eating habits and will then pass these on to my children and never mention healthy eating and exercise for fear of eating disorders. All of those assumptions would be wrong, I grew up in an incredibly healthy and active family and never had to learn how to eat healthily because I grew up knowing. I also grew up with a fear of fatness drilled into me. my mother had an eating disorder, so did my grandmother. And so do I.
I would also like to point that there are worse things than being a little chubby. Yes, I dared to say that on this website. There is never any reason to make a child feel like their body is wrong before they've even stopped growing.0 -
i would bet she sees mommy doing it and wants to as well. I think it's great, personally. My 4.5 year old jogs and walks with me now bc she saw me doing it. To her it is just all fun and games and something to do with mommy. SHE (big focus on she here) has been talking about running with other people wearing a number on our chest. She wants us to be in a race. Probably in a year she and I will do a 5k together.
I do think the language you use is important. I don't say fat. I say that exercise is healthy and good for our heart and helps us to grow strong. I do the same thing w foods. She know that suckers taste good but broccoli is a growing food.0 -
I would say go for it and let her. My 12 year old daughter and I have been exercising together for years doing various dance and strength training DVDs. Where I work in an elementary school I know that they do very similar, if not the same exercises in P.E. class so as long as she doesn't over do it she should be just fine.0
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OH OK!!! so the 30 day shred is not about dieting? How stupid of me.
I guess thats why I asked.
30 day shred is about exercising.....what you consume is about dieting. Two totally separate things but when accompanied together properly will help you reach the best results possible. She just said her little girl wants to do what she is doing exercise wise. She is too young to correlate weight loss with eating and exercise so she needs to be taught that. Starting by allowing her to participate is a great first step to introduce health and nutrition to her. Plus she will be able to eat more if she likes it and exercises with mommy. The goal is to teach them it is okay to eat and that eating can lead to fat loss coupled with exercise. She is setting her daughter up to never have an ED. Very smart mommy!
I'm not so convinced by your arguments. I don't think it's a problem to let her 6 year old do 30DS, but I don't think she should being led to the idea of needing to exercise to lose fat. At six, she should understand you exercise because it's fun and because it's good for you. If she needs specifics about why it's good, I'd stick with things like it helps your muscles get strong, it helps you sleep better at night and it's good for your brain to make your blood move fast around your body by moving your body fast. I would strongly suggest leaving out all reference to exercise and fat loss at this age.
It is not an argument it is a statement. I am not trying to convince you of anything. My statement....
"The goal is to teach them it is okay to eat and that eating can lead to fat loss coupled with exercise."
is fact. Says nothing about the little girl being worried about being fat. If you choose to teach your children that you exercise because it is fun and helps your muscles get strong that is your choice. I think that leaving out the fact that it prevents you from being fat is just as important as the others. It is not okay to be fat and when ppl stop coddling children about it or hiding it from them we will be a much more healthier world. It is never too early to teach a child that fat is not okay and can lead to many health problems.
this is why so many children get eating disorders. No, I'm serious. Exercising is a good thing but teaching children to diet is very wrong. Also you have to be very careful with saying things like "exercise because then you can eat more and not get fat" or anything suggesting exercise is for weightloss or for stopping you getting fat from what you just ate.
also this child is 6 years old but seriously the kind of talk you're suggesting will lead to her feeling uncomfortable in her body.
I suggest reading the accounts of people whose eating disorder developed from how they were talked to about dieting, weightloss and fatness at home. Or reading up on the very interesting results of studies that showed that weight management and obesity prevention measures in children increased the risk of anorexia in the teens.
The issue is can a 6 year old do the 30 day shred? probably not but doing a fun dance workout with a child seems like a fun way to get her involved. The fact she's asking you about her weight is very worrying though. Have you seen the statistics for how many 9 year old girls are already on a diet?
I just posted pics of my 12 yr old son and 15 yr old daughter.....the methods I mentioned above work I have proof. Are your kids fat? Maybe you should consider that. My daughter eats like a freaking racehorse and I dont stop her. She also is very active. I taught them this. And now I am showing them that it is hard to fix so to avoid it dont get fat. My daughter said....."it is your fault you got fat mom we ate the same thing you did but you sat around and we went out...." Which is very true I gave up on life for a minute and missed out on alot of outings with them. Never again!
no I do not have fat children. Well, I have an 8 month old who has cute chubby cheeks. You probably assume that I grew up in a fat and lazy family with poor eating habits and will then pass these on to my children and never mention healthy eating and exercise for fear of eating disorders. All of those assumptions would be wrong, I grew up in an incredibly healthy and active family and never had to learn how to eat healthily because I grew up knowing. I also grew up with a fear of fatness drilled into me. my mother had an eating disorder, so did my grandmother. And so do I.
I would also like to point that there are worse things than being a little chubby. Yes, I dared to say that on this website. There is never any reason to make a child feel like their body is wrong before they've even stopped growing.
I try not to assume anything and that coupled with the fact I could care less how you were brought up makes for good personal results. Congrats on your chubby baby They are the cutest! Whether you are brought up with good habits and taught these things matters not now if you are old and fat. I am simply saying if these methods were implemented at a young age the chances of that child growing up to be a fatty is lowered. I grew up just like I am teaching my children and I got fat.Now I admit it was due to other factors (drugs and drinking) but I knew better! I knew better ALL the way around. It is just a preventative tool to use within your home or in your family so to avoid future issues that s all. It is not meant to be oh I am better than you you are a crappy parent for not doing this. It is info take it...use it..spread it......No a six yr old shouldnt be worried about being fat but yes she should learn the preventative measures to never experience that lifestyle. If it is done correctly ED and other issues like it ar e NEVER an end result.0 -
My two year old daughter was just doing the shred with me this morning. She doesn't do the whole routine, but she came over to do some squats. She generally joins me to do whatever exercise I'm doing if she thinks it looks fun. I don't think there's anything wrong with it; she wants to do whatever i'm doing.0
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Girls this age want to be like their moms. She's learning how to be a girl and act like a girl from you and others she's around on a regular basis. So I'd be very careful of the words you say when talking about weight.
I don't know how she feels about her own self image. But tell her that you've made changes because you want to improve your health so that you can be healthier. I wouldn't weigh in front of her or talk about calories, "bad food," dieting, etc. She seems to be a perceptive child, so be careful. Talk with her so you can get a feel for where her head's at.
The idea of exercise for her is a good one! She may develop some lifelong, healthy habits. I'm not familiar with what's involved with the shred program, but at 6, she doesn't need to be lifting weights if it's part of the program. You don't want to damage her bones and/or joints, especially while she's growing. Get her involved with a sport or other physical activity if she's interested. I coached gymnastics for years and highly recommend it--but only with knowledgeable instructors that keep it fun and don't push too fast. Whatever she chooses to do should be something that makes her happy!
Good luck. I'm so glad my daughter and son are grown now (30 and 21). Raising kids is really tough these days. There are so many outside influences...0 -
A child is going to find the majority of Jillian's moves easier than it would be for an adult - just don't let them use any hand weights. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with exercising with your child!
And why is it so taboo to talk about weight management, exercise and healthy eating with your child? Most times a child (and an adult) has a bad self-image BECAUSE they are fat. They are better off if you don't let it happen in the first place.
There are so many overweight people in this world (70% or more) compared to the number of folks with true anorexia (less than 3%). The same people who are afraid of their kids getting a bad self image are the same ones who let them snack in front of the computer all day long - hence the obesity problem in the western world.0 -
Its not the fact the fact that kids wanting to be like their mommies that are the problem here. The issue is teaching them about dieting and calorie counting and body imaging at age 6. Like I said, this is one reason why my body image always been kind of messed up. I have a 6 year old boy. I provide healthy food for him. I tell him he will grow BIG and STRONG if he eats healthy and exercise. He really likes that. But I also let him eats the things most kids like. If I had a daughter I would be very careful. A six year old should not ask her mom if she lost weight. That is very sad.0
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The same people who are afraid of their kids getting a bad self image are the same ones who let them snack in front of the computer all day long -
Is that what you are doing? Because I sure don't. That statement is just plain ignorant.0 -
I try not to assume anything and that coupled with the fact I could care less how you were brought up makes for good personal results. Congrats on your chubby baby They are the cutest! Whether you are brought up with good habits and taught these things matters not now if you are old and fat. I am simply saying if these methods were implemented at a young age the chances of that child growing up to be a fatty is lowered. I grew up just like I am teaching my children and I got fat.Now I admit it was due to other factors (drugs and drinking) but I knew better! I knew better ALL the way around. It is just a preventative tool to use within your home or in your family so to avoid future issues that s all. It is not meant to be oh I am better than you you are a crappy parent for not doing this. It is info take it...use it..spread it......No a six yr old shouldnt be worried about being fat but yes she should learn the preventative measures to never experience that lifestyle. If it is done correctly ED and other issues like it are NEVER an end result.
What I fail to see is how you don't understand that a narrow minded focus on fat can be harmful to children, adults too. Instead of focusing on exercise and food choices as a way to avoid becoming fat why not focus on exercise and food choices as a way to be healthy?
OP,
I think it is fine for your daughter to do 30 day shred with you, it sounds like a great way to spend time together. I would be a bit concerned about your daughter asking if she lost weight. As others suggested I would be careful about talking about calories, food restrictions, losing weight, and negative body image statements in front of your daughter. I would talk about healthy choices, moderation, and nutrition as a part of daily life while encouraging an active family lifestyle.0 -
I totally disagree. Teach them to be active and healthy? Yes. Teach them to be active and healthy so they don't get fat? No. Children do not need to be instilled with a fear of being fat. It's that kind of mindset that leads to disordered eating and an unhealthy relationship with food in the future. Kids should be active because it's fun, and should eat healthy foods because their parents have instilled in them an understanding of the importance of health, not the importance of avoiding fat. A kid who is raised with a healthy activity level and mindset won't be "in the 5th grade and fat." They'll just be a healthy kid. A kid who is raised to worry about being fat will spend the rest of her life worrying about being fat. This can lead to a negative relationship with food and with their bodies in adulthood, unreasonable restrictive dieting, and, in some cases, dangerous and life-threatening eating disorders.
There's nothing wrong with encouraging your kids to work out and eat healthy, but you need to watch how you talk about it with young children. There are enough messages out there promoting unhealthy body images. Young girls today need to be taught to love, respect, and care for their bodies, not to be afraid of getting fat. The end result is that they will have both a healthy body and a healthy mind, not just a skinny waistline. There's nothing wrong with her doing the 30 day shred with mommy, but if a healthy six year old is talking about losing weight, then that's a problem. It's important to change the conversation with her from one about weight loss to one about health and self-care.
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I try not to assume anything and that coupled with the fact I could care less how you were brought up makes for good personal results. Congrats on your chubby baby They are the cutest! Whether you are brought up with good habits and taught these things matters not now if you are old and fat. I am simply saying if these methods were implemented at a young age the chances of that child growing up to be a fatty is lowered. I grew up just like I am teaching my children and I got fat.Now I admit it was due to other factors (drugs and drinking) but I knew better! I knew better ALL the way around. It is just a preventative tool to use within your home or in your family so to avoid future issues that s all. It is not meant to be oh I am better than you you are a crappy parent for not doing this. It is info take it...use it..spread it......No a six yr old shouldnt be worried about being fat but yes she should learn the preventative measures to never experience that lifestyle. If it is done correctly ED and other issues like it are NEVER an end result.
What I fail to see is how you don't understand that a narrow minded focus on fat can be harmful to children, adults too. Instead of focusing on exercise and food choices as a way to avoid becoming fat why not focus on exercise and food choices as a way to be healthy?
OP,
I think it is fine for your daughter to do 30 day shred with you, it sounds like a great way to spend time together. I would be a bit concerned about your daughter asking if she lost weight. As others suggested I would be careful about talking about calories, food restrictions, losing weight, and negative body image statements in front of your daughter. I would talk about healthy choices, moderation, and nutrition as a part of daily life while encouraging an active family lifestyle.
This. Being active with your daughter is fine, and will probably be fun.
Being vocal about your perceived body image, need to lose weight, etc. is not advised. As someone who was around that self-loathing/diet obsession in my mother, it really messed with my head.0
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