Skinny people and the word fat

elliott062907

OK, I know I am not the only one.
At work, people tell me I do not eat enough to stay alive, well for those that can see my food log every day, that is not true. I just eat healthy.

Then they say, "oh are you trying to loose weight?"

When I reply yes, they actually have the nerve to tell me, Yeah, I need to do somehing too...

But here is the gist, they are all size 6 or lower.....

So why is it, "some", skinny people have the dumbest things to say???

Are they afraid to be around fat people, are we going to eat them??

Are they going to catch our "fat", genes??

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

elliott062907

OK, I know I am not the only one.
At work, people tell me I do not eat enough to stay alive, well for those that can see my food log every day, that is not true. I just eat healthy.

Then they say, "oh are you trying to loose weight?"

When I reply yes, they actually have the nerve to tell me, Yeah, I need to do somehing too...

But here is the gist, they are all size 6 or lower.....

So why is it, "some", skinny people have the dumbest things to say???

Are they afraid to be around fat people, are we going to eat them??

Are they going to catch our "fat", genes??

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

sr2000

Or when we lose a couple pounds and our skinny 125 pound friend says, "oh your going to waste away, your getting so skinny!"... Nope I'm sure all 180 pounds of me isn't about to "waste away" anytime soon, and I'm pretty sure you're in no danger of me borrowing all you clothes anytime soon, (or ever, I'll never be 125!) It's like they just want to be the only thin one around!

sportsmomof2

ahh..you are cracking me up! :laugh:

no the kicker is ...

"Im seriouly overweight..." said the 110 lb woman..who is 5'8.

Please...when I lose the weight if anyone notices the level of intellegence in my brain decreasing...please someone kick me and set me straight.

Have a great day...and thanks for the chuckle...do they think we are going to eat them...HA HA..Im still laughing about that...

:laugh:

may_marie

i have had the same experiences..

people are starting to notice that i lost weight then ask,, how much more do you want to loose ? i say 55 pounds and they go ..... ho noooooo that would make you look way tooooo skinny..
that comes from people weighting 125 lbs . and me loosing 55 lbs would bring me to 145 .(witch is the cutting point of me being overweight to healthy).....
now thats strange...... because the next thing they say is ..... wow .. i wish i could loose some weight too... !!!!!!!!
:noway:

i think that people that are already skinny see themself as big because of the pressure from society..
my friend is 5'7'' at 120 lbs and she was ashamed of "admiting" her weight to me.. shes the type to really take notice of those celebrity magazine and videos... that just drives me bananas....
may

elliott062907

i DON'T THNK THEY REALIZE THEY DO IT, i THINK THEY ARE JUST LOOKING FOR A WAY OUT OF THE INSERT FOOT INTO MOUTH SYMDROME.....

filergirl

Or when we lose a couple pounds and our skinny 125 pound friend says, "oh your going to waste away, your getting so skinny!"... Nope I'm sure all 180 pounds of me isn't about to "waste away" anytime soon, and I'm pretty sure you're in no danger of me borrowing all you clothes anytime soon, (or ever, I'll never be 125!) It's like they just want to be the only thin one around!

You actually probably don't look "fat" to her. We're our own toughest critics. Many people will tend to pick apart their own physical flaws, but overlook those of others. To her, you probably look fine, and she is wondering why you are trying to lose weight.

rayneenie

Or when we lose a couple pounds and our skinny 125 pound friend says, "oh your going to waste away, your getting so skinny!"... Nope I'm sure all 180 pounds of me isn't about to "waste away" anytime soon, and I'm pretty sure you're in no danger of me borrowing all you clothes anytime soon, (or ever, I'll never be 125!) It's like they just want to be the only thin one around!

You actually probably don't look "fat" to her. We're our own toughest critics. Many people will tend to pick apart their own physical flaws, but overlook those of others. To her, you probably look fine, and she is wondering why you are trying to lose weight.

I will agree I am my own worst critic but when some woman who is 125 pounds looks at me (at 400 + pounds) and tells me I look fine or That she knows how hard it is and she just can't seem to shed that extra few pounds I feel like reaching out and strangling her. There is no way people look at me and not see the fat. I just wish that people who have never had more than 20 pounds to lose in thier entire lives would realize there is no way they know what it is like to need to lose 200 pounds. It is like a kick in the teeth to hear someone that size say they are fat!

jbuehrer

I have friends of all sizes that say they are fat.. even i say I am fat... But it is at a certain degree. I have love handles and my legs rub together. My friend is 50 pounds overweight. I have another friend that look soooo skinny... but we have one thing in common...We all say, "I'm getting fat", or "I'm trying to lose weight"

So what do we say to each other....
Not
"Your getting big"
"yeah, you could loose a few pounds there"
"you look anorexic"

People say "you look fine" because they are uncomfortable to tell them anything else. Some people are not born motivators. I will be offended if they are honest, I will be offended if they say I look fine, and I will be offended if they say nothing at all.

Don't worry what other people think. You are doing this for yourself. You see what needs to be done. So you have the power to get it done.

So when I say (I'm only 140..was 150 @ 5'8) I'm loosing weight and the response is. "You don't need to loose weight" My ending sentence is "you haven't seen me naked"

Good luck to you all! It all starts with loving yourself

annhjk

I agree with mehughes. I can look at people that are bigger than me, but don't have the celulite or thery have legs with a nice shape and wish mine looked like that - and sometime's it's that they are very comfortable with their body (queen latifa for example). We were talking to a trainer at the gym and we've started to realize that no matter what we weigh or how fit we are, it's not going to be perfect. I wish I was better at getting a way from the numbers in the world (scales, size, etc) and be proud of what I"m accomplishing.

breakingthepath

Or when we lose a couple pounds and our skinny 125 pound friend says, "oh your going to waste away, your getting so skinny!"... Nope I'm sure all 180 pounds of me isn't about to "waste away" anytime soon, and I'm pretty sure you're in no danger of me borrowing all you clothes anytime soon, (or ever, I'll never be 125!) It's like they just want to be the only thin one around!

You actually probably don't look "fat" to her. We're our own toughest critics. Many people will tend to pick apart their own physical flaws, but overlook those of others. To her, you probably look fine, and she is wondering why you are trying to lose weight.

I will agree I am my own worst critic but when some woman who is 125 pounds looks at me (at 400 + pounds) and tells me I look fine or That she knows how hard it is and she just can't seem to shed that extra few pounds I feel like reaching out and strangling her. There is no way people look at me and not see the fat. I just wish that people who have never had more than 20 pounds to lose in thier entire lives would realize there is no way they know what it is like to need to lose 200 pounds. It is like a kick in the teeth to hear someone that size say they are fat!

Nobody sees their weight the way other people see it. I recently confessed to a close friend that I was trying to drop about fifty pounds and she said that I looked more like I could lift that much than I could stand to lose it. I kinda see what she's talking about, but at the same time all I also see someone who hopes like crazy that their work uniform comes in an XXL. Skinny people almost never see all the weight you think you need to lose.

emtink

i told my uber-skinny friend that i wanted to lose 50 pounds, and she said it was too much. in her defense, most people don't think i weigh as much as i do. people 'carry' their weight differently. my skinny friend then told me some pretty bad comments she's gotten like 'how did you ever get pregnant', 'you're anorexic', etc. equally insulting i think. she's a very healthy vegetarian mom of 3 kids, also a pilates instructor. so it goes both ways. some people just don't have tact

banks1850

This must be a female thing. Guys saw me start working out about 8 months ago and just said "your crazy man, I wouldn't put myself through that." and now they still say it but they add "but you can tell your looking a lot thinner now." Where they immediately regret saying something like that to a guy and turn and walk away as fast as pride allows. LOL! It's usually a pretty funny scene. Sometimes I feel like I have an unfair advantage being a guy and doing this, woman definately have a lot more pressure on them for this stuff. It's pretty rare when a guy gets vindictive or jealous over another guy's body. Unless he's oogling your wife, then it becomes a different story.
I hear all the stories on here about female friends trying to sabotage your success. For guys, they pretty much put it out there. My friends say things like "Dude, eat what you want, but I'm still ordering the potato skins and buffalo fingers. But I'll keep em out of your reach if you want."
Course these are the same guys that will be wondering why I have 30 stolen bases this year when they have 6. LOL!

Helawat

Or when we lose a couple pounds and our skinny 125 pound friend says, "oh your going to waste away, your getting so skinny!"... Nope I'm sure all 180 pounds of me isn't about to "waste away" anytime soon, and I'm pretty sure you're in no danger of me borrowing all you clothes anytime soon, (or ever, I'll never be 125!) It's like they just want to be the only thin one around!

You actually probably don't look "fat" to her. We're our own toughest critics. Many people will tend to pick apart their own physical flaws, but overlook those of others. To her, you probably look fine, and she is wondering why you are trying to lose weight.

I will agree I am my own worst critic but when some woman who is 125 pounds looks at me (at 400 + pounds) and tells me I look fine or That she knows how hard it is and she just can't seem to shed that extra few pounds I feel like reaching out and strangling her. There is no way people look at me and not see the fat. I just wish that people who have never had more than 20 pounds to lose in thier entire lives would realize there is no way they know what it is like to need to lose 200 pounds. It is like a kick in the teeth to hear someone that size say they are fat!

I was ripped on about this by a fat lady on the bus the other night. The lady must've been 150-200 pounds overweight and in her 50's. I'm a size 6-8, 5'4, and a sporting a small B cup. Obviously I'm a lot smaller than she.

I'm talking on my cellphone and I tell my friend that I'm going to the gym more often because I'm getting fat and this lady turns around and interjects into my conversation, "you're so skinny, you don't know what fat is. Try to lose 100 pounds and you'll know my pain...blah blah blah."

I was so upset at her, but give me a break. I told my friend that I was becoming fat (a relative word) not obese. I'm sorry but from my point of view when I no longer fit into my size 4-5 jeans skinny jeans I view myself as fat.

I'm doing this for me, not for her. In this case, the lady should have minded her own business.

elliott062907

Or when we lose a couple pounds and our skinny 125 pound friend says, "oh your going to waste away, your getting so skinny!"... Nope I'm sure all 180 pounds of me isn't about to "waste away" anytime soon, and I'm pretty sure you're in no danger of me borrowing all you clothes anytime soon, (or ever, I'll never be 125!) It's like they just want to be the only thin one around!

You actually probably don't look "fat" to her. We're our own toughest critics. Many people will tend to pick apart their own physical flaws, but overlook those of others. To her, you probably look fine, and she is wondering why you are trying to lose weight.

I will agree I am my own worst critic but when some woman who is 125 pounds looks at me (at 400 + pounds) and tells me I look fine or That she knows how hard it is and she just can't seem to shed that extra few pounds I feel like reaching out and strangling her. There is no way people look at me and not see the fat. I just wish that people who have never had more than 20 pounds to lose in thier entire lives would realize there is no way they know what it is like to need to lose 200 pounds. It is like a kick in the teeth to hear someone that size say they are fat!

I was ripped on about this by a fat lady on the bus the other night. The lady must've been 150-200 pounds overweight and in her 50's. I'm a size 6-8, 5'4, and a sporting a small B cup. Obviously I'm a lot smaller than she.

I'm talking on my cellphone and I tell my friend that I'm going to the gym more often because I'm getting fat and this lady turns around and interjects into my conversation, "you're so skinny, you don't know what fat is. Try to lose 100 pounds and you'll know my pain...blah blah blah."

I was so upset at her, but give me a break. I told my friend that I was becoming fat (a relative word) not obese. I'm sorry but from my point of view when I no longer fit into my size 4-5 jeans skinny jeans I view myself as fat.

I'm doing this for me, not for her. In this case, the lady should have minded her own business.

omg, I have been there too........ to each there own of course, but I had some one come up to me a bit larger then I and do the exact same thing.

REB89

i think the reason that some skinny people say you don't need to lose weight is becasue they are jealous. They don't want you to look as good as them. They want to be the thin and in shape one in the room and by you losing weight they feel rivaled and I guess a bit threatened. That's certainly my expereince anyway!

edleim

Not to argue but as a "skinny person" I thought i would offer my view. I am and have always eaten relatively healthy, you would not find me in a fast food restaurant and i have always done some form of exercise, I also walk a lot because i live in NY. Over the last couple of years things like grad school and living with a boy have changed my eating a little (love cheese and wine and wings and beer). After a while it king of catches up with you. Please understand that someone who is 127 when they are used to being 120 and wants to get back to their former self is often critisized for wanting to do so. I know it is a "different" kind of weight loss than others might be going through but it is actually really hard to lose weight when you have little to lost.

I do not thing thin people don't want you thin. I think that is silly, but i understand where you are coming from. I always notice when friends who are a little larger lose some weight and i am always encouraging because it is more about losing weight it is about making a change (more of a change then say a skinny person is making)

I know this may not apply but it is kind of like someone with money troubles complaining about it to someone wealthy. It is uncomfortable for the wealthy one and the poor one is thinking the wealthy one is judging them the whole time. So complain about your lack of money with your fellow poor friends but don't hesitate to ask your rich friends for advice. That way everyone no one feels "weird"

bjigglepants

i've never given much thought to anyone "skinny" making those types of comments. i guess i'd just take it as them trying to show their support in some way (they may also suffer from body dysmorphia). i'm also pretty sure skinny people get tired of people telling them they need to eat something or told to gain some weight. whether you're skinny or overweight, or just need to drop a few pounds, everyone needs support at trying to achieve their goals.

DianneLynn

Discussing Weight Loss falls into the Sex & Politics Category....oooo Grass Cutting & Fertilizing tooo.....TABOO SUBJECTS to steer clear of.

cobra1368

I think society has made EVERYONE self conscious, regardless of our outward appearance. There are many, many skinny people with even lower self esteem than some heavier people.

And it is THOSE skinny people that look at those that are heavier ("pleasantly plump" as my grandpa used to describe grandma!), and it makes them feel better about themselves.

So if those heavier people were to become skinny, the skinny people don't feel so special anymore.

That is my take on it.

I happen to not be heavy or overweight. I am just trying to get healthier and tone up what I already have. But I have always had friends of all sizes. And I've noticed the differences in behavior of the skinny people towards the heavier ones, and I really think they want them to stay fat in order for the skinny people to keep getting the good attention from it.

And yes, I think that is sick. I have acted as a support system more than once for a heavy friend trying to get thin.

Personally, I get enough attention being 6'2" and a woman. :happy: And there is NOTHING I can do to change my height, except wear 4" heels and become 6'6" !!

REB89

I think society has made EVERYONE self conscious, regardless of our outward appearance. There are many, many skinny people with even lower self esteem than some heavier people.

And it is THOSE skinny people that look at those that are heavier ("pleasantly plump" as my grandpa used to describe grandma!), and it makes them feel better about themselves.

So if those heavier people were to become skinny, the skinny people don't feel so special anymore.

That is my take on it.

I happen to not be heavy or overweight. I am just trying to get healthier and tone up what I already have. But I have always had friends of all sizes. And I've noticed the differences in behavior of the skinny people towards the heavier ones, and I really think they want them to stay fat in order for the skinny people to keep getting the good attention from it.

well said!

rowlandk

I had something like this happen to me at work. I have been bringing my lunch (we have a cook) so that I knew exactly what was going into my food (very hard to lose weight with a cook). Well this girl I work with caught me on this site and started adding up her calories too and has the guts to tell me that she is trying so hard to lose 5 pounds. Hard? I could do that in a week if that's all I needed. She told me she has started going to the gym and of coarse, the trainers were all hitting on her (she said). It is just hurtful because I am trying so incredibly hard to do this and she is almost rubbing it in my face that she only wants to lose 5 pounds. I think she weighs around 115.

GinaB30

It IS hard when a *skinny* person (especially the people that don't have to work at it to be skinny)
says they are "SOOO FAT" and need to lose a bunch of weight.

How does that make the over weight people feel?

I am probably guilty of this in the past- but I was struggling with not eatig and over exercising and DID think I was very fat...and had previously went from 165 to 124 (5'8)
So, I think that if someone actually has a problem (be it anorexia, etc) than they really DO see themselves as fat...and for an overweight person to dismiss their feelings is just as bad really.

No one knows what the other is going through...so we should ALL get a little more tact.

greeneyedgirl

I think it's wrong to be categorizing people into the "fat" and "skinny" categories regardless. Overall, most people just want to be healthy. I don't think skinny people have the mentality of hurting people's feelings, trying to stall their weight loss or any of that nonsense. You are pretty much tearing down slimmer people and saying they can make dumb comments when everyone is capable of doing just that. It's wrong to judge people based on size and I think that is what this post has done.

emtink

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

MontanaGirl

I think it's wrong to be categorizing people into the "fat" and "skinny" categories regardless. Overall, most people just want to be healthy. I don't think skinny people have the mentality of hurting people's feelings, trying to stall their weight loss or any of that nonsense. You are pretty much tearing down slimmer people and saying they can make dumb comments when everyone is capable of doing just that. It's wrong to judge people based on size and I think that is what this post has done.

I think this post is about a personal reaction to a thin person trying to make a person losing weight feel like they don't need to or shouldn't while the thin person tries to make it seem like they need to lose weight. Because they're sooooo fat. You certainly know there is a major difference between needing to lose 3 or 5 or 10 lbs and needing to lose 60 or 100 or 45. If you have 3 or 5 lbs to lose you are not "soooo fat" you are maybe a little out of shape. And why can't people just say "Good for you. I hope you are successful!" Instead of turning it around and making it about them?? It's really just a knee-jerk reaction saying "Hey, I need to lose too. Notice me, pay attention to me" NOT saying every thin person does that either. But some certainly do!

filergirl

Once again, we have uncovered a universal truth:

Perspective. Always try to look at things as if you're in that other person's shoes. Otherwise, others will just be categorized into fat / skinny / vegetarian / meat-eater / child-bearing / childless, ad nauseum. It will always be "me vs. them."

Of course, we all maintain those inherent indentifications, which are based on our own self-identifiers (I am "fat" at 200 lbs, therefore a 140 pound person is "small.") The point isn't to elimate these (it's impossible, and it would reduce our society to a mindless politically-correct pile of rubble - happening already? Hmm . . . another rant altogether ) but rather to base our judgements on thoughtful appraisals of others' potential worldview.

I fail at this several times a week at the least, but I keep trying, anyway.

dulceluva

Oh man. Do I understand this thread or what. It has always been apart of my life. At work, my co-worker knows I am struggling with my weight and says that she needs to lose at least 20 lbs so she can get back to her almost 100 lbs frame (5,8 might I add) and then she asks me if we could go to mcDonalds to get their breakfast...suddenly she is like, "ahh who cares, I dont really need to lose weight" but then the next day she's telling me how muich better her body looked when she was almost 100 lbs.

Then there is a friend of min who is, what, a size 5 and i would comment that I gained about 5 lbs since hte last time we saw each other and she'd go on and on about "Oh I know, look how fat my legs are...." meanwhile she showing me pictures of her in Jamaica with her barely there bikini.

It always the thinner ones that say, "ohh, you dont need to lose so much but yea...I should probably do something about this things" ...while you there trying really hard to squeeze together love handles.

Now don't get me wrong. I am not mad at them because i am the overweight one and they are not - I got myself into my own troubles but still... if i am talking about how fat I am, please dont interrupt me to tel me that you need to lose 5 lbs.

bjigglepants

so does that mean that when i see people on this board (the people who have pics as their avs or on their profiles) and see that they're all "skinnier" than me (and most of y'all are) that it's ok for me to roll my eyes and say "girl, puh-lease"? i think not (and i could care less what your reasons are for losing weight/counting calories/taking care of yourself). i agree with the people who've pointed out that it's a matter of perspective and treating others as you'd want to be treated; giving them the benefit of the doubt.

just because someone is skinny it doesn't mean they don't have their own struggles with weight. or struggle with their body image. it could very well be that when you say something to a more slender person that it makes them feel like they're in an awkward position. who doesn't say something incredibly stupid in awkward situations?

guess what i'm trying to say is....don't let what other people say bother you so much. it's not worth the wasted energy

oh and for the record. i'm not skinny. i'm 5'3" and weigh 195 pounds. i've been heavy for the past six years and since i have no thyroid, i'll likely be heavy for the rest of my life.

MontanaGirl

oh and for the record. i'm not skinny. i'm 5'3" and weigh 195 pounds. i've been heavy for the past six years and since i have no thyroid, i'll likely be heavy for the rest of my life.

Not if you are taking meds and get regulated properly. True - if you are not on the right dose of med for your non-thyroid (:laugh: I think I made a new word!) then you won't be able to lose weight, but if you are on the correct dose of medication you will be able to lose weight. At least I am able to (finally!!)

bjigglepants

that's the thing, i'm not to that state yet. they've been tinkering with my meds for a year and i haven't gotten to that magic doseage yet. i have been promised that once i do, that i'll be able to work off my jiggle and once i reach my "happy" point they'll drop it to euthroid state.

i've been heavy for so long that i'm comfortable with my body. losing weight would be nice, but i'm more concerned about taking care of myself. making sure i'm around to see my kids have kids (that's a scary thought because my kids are NUTS) and to be able to annoy my hubby for a long time.