Is this a suspicious incident?

islandlifenc

I'm sure I'll get flamed for saying this since there seem to be so many anti-2nd Amendment folks here on MFP, but if you don't want to change your walking routine, then concealed carry is a great solution.

Better yet, open carry.

That'll give anyone a second thought before approaching you and your mom.

cuterbee

It might have been -- or it could have been any number of things. You have to listen to your instincts, though.

If it wasn't the sex offender's truck, and it doesn't come back, I wouldn't worry about it. Some people on the sex offenders list will never reoffend. There's a least a dozen who live within a mile of my home (I live in a city), yet I walk my neighborhood all the time (even by myself and late at night) with no problems.

You may find reading "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin DeBecker to be helpful.

cuterbee

The Gift of Fear, by Gavin de Becker. Act on your gut, because it's responding to logic that you don't fully have time to process.

Beat me to it!

MsCristie

I have heard that it is never safe to have a routine. If you have a routine, that's when something like this could turn out bad. Maybe switch up the times, the routes or something. And I agree with everyone else- always trust your instinct. Be safe!

thisismeraw

I'm sure I'll get flamed for saying this since there seem to be so many anti-2nd Amendment folks here on MFP, but if you don't want to change your walking routine, then concealed carry is a great solution.

Better yet, open carry.

That'll give anyone a second thought before approaching you and your mom.

However, if they both got so freaked out they needed to run because of a truck in a parking lot that hadn't yet made any form of threatening move, I wouldn't think carrying a deadly weapon is a good idea.

And carrying a gun is not an option everywhere nor do I think people should jump to carrying a gun all the time. But, everyone needs to do what they feel is right. Never carry if you aren't prepared to use it and haven't been trained to properly use it. Carrying without proper confidence or training will just do more harm than good. There are ultimately far too many guns out there and they are far too easily obtained... one reason I'm glad I'm in Canada. Not gun free but much much harder to get.

sarahkatara

Hey everyone,

I need to ask a question about something that happened the other day that is sort of not-so-fitness related. It's a little strange and random, but here it goes. It's a very long story so bear with me.

Every night my Mom and I go walking for exercise around the same time after supper, around 6:30-7:30. We go to a small back parking lot behind a church near our house. We walk through the graveyard to get there. We have been doing this for a few weeks now and a few days ago, we had supper late so we went to walk at 7:20, a rare occurrence.

As we were walking up the graveyard path to go to the lot, we noticed a white truck parked in the upper corner of the lot, backed into a parking space and facing our direction. We stopped and stared at the truck in the distance and no more than thirty seconds to a minute after we waited there, looking at it and deciding what to do, slightly annoyed that we couldn't walk yet and may have to just walk the gravel path, the truck pulled out, almost as if they were waiting for us and left upon seeing us.

At the time, I was slightly apprehensive but didn't think anything of it. I figured it was probably just someone stopping to adjust something or to look at a map or anything of that sort and that it was just a random occurrence. So we went over and started walking as usual. About 30 minutes into the walk, my mom told me to run because the white truck was back. We were rounding another lap and were right near the road leading to the graveyard path and back to our house. I looked behind and saw the large white truck pulling into the lot in an arc-shape, seemingly coming toward us. It was very near us and had a very oppressive and ominous presence. Despite being very near to us, neither of us could see the driver at all because the windows/windshield were very darkly tinted. We were in too much of a rush to get the license plate.

Although my mom often overreacts to things like this, I also felt an innate fear, intuition, and urge to run on this occasion; it felt like i was in danger, like something wasn't right. Thankfully, we were lucky enough to be near the road and not deep in the lot. We ran across the road and through the graveyard back home. The truck stayed there for about 15 or 20 minutes but no one ever got out or anything. I have tried to think of all the reasons why someone would need to be there, like a student driver, a workman of some sort, or even someone who just wanted privacy for some reason, but nothing seems to add up. Why did this person really need to return to this quiet, uneventful parking lot after 30 minutes? I can't help but to feel that someone was trying to prey on us and their plan was foiled when we somehow knew or were creeped out and ran.

I was on alert mode and ran because the same truck returned for reasons I don't know, reasons that have the possibility of being malicious and involving me. Why did the truck return? Was he initially parked because he was waiting for us and we just happened to be late for this particular day, which foiled his plans? Did he stay for awhile after returning just because he saw us watching him and he knew that if he pulled out, it would confirm our suspicions that he indeed was there just for us? If he did have some legitimate reason for being there, why was there no evidence of him doing that, like a student driving around trying to learn or anything else? I keep asking myself these questions but my mind keeps returning to the frightening conclusion that he was likely a predator.

By the way, I am an 18 year old female, so I am at a high risk for some kind of incident like that. Additionally, I am now extremely paranoid because I checked online and there is a sex offender who lives on the same road as me. Also, he has to pass the church parking lot and then my house to get from his work to his house every day....

After thinking about this for so long, I don't know what to believe. Has this ever happened to anyone else? Do you think i"m over-reacting to a random or benign incident, or is this really a suspicious incident or some kind of offender? We haven't gone back to the parking lot to walk since. We just walk in our yard. Now I am worried that someone is going to start stalking us. Any thoughts? I hope you don't think I'm crazy.....

Unfortunately as young women we do have to have some fear in this world. It's horrible that we have to but true nonetheless. You did the right thing by getting out of there. I would go into your local police station and report it as a suspicious person/incident. Or, call 911 and tell them it's a non-emergency. Report all the specifics that you can remember- times it showed up and left, make and model of truck, color, etc- and ask for an officer to follow up with you. Ask for a contact number for the station to call and ask about the case. Generally, they will send officers out to scope out the area at least once. If they don't do anything the first time, DON'T STOP. Continue reporting it. You have the right to walk in your local park and not feel as if you're risking your life. DO NOT IGNORE THIS. Let us know what happens and stay safe!

As an aside, i carry a heavy duty mace (pepper spray) with me everywhere i go, ESPECIALLY exercising outside. I'm a long distance runner so i fashioned a way to carry it anywhere i go. Something to think about. You can get them usually at gun shows or online. Check the laws in your state about them. I won't say explicitly to break the law, but i will say to protect yourself at any cost because you are the ONLY one who can do so.

cazzer69

From this side of the pond the "Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave" is looking more like the "Land of the Besieged and the home of the Scared of their own shadows".

I'm so glad I didn't move over 20 years ago when I had the opportunity.
I wouldn't want to live in fear.

Shambree813

Always trust gut instinct and intuition, But I am curious why you havent called the police? If they were there and came back 30 min later circling the parking lot, I would have been dialing 911 as soon as I was back home...just so the police could check it out. If they keep returning, a simple complaint call asking them to check the church would be the rational response...not immediately assuming it is someone stalking and is coming to get you. Caution is healthy, overreaction not so much.

sarahkatara

Every night my Mom and I go walking for exercise around the same time after supper, around 6:30-7:30. We go to a small back parking lot behind a church near our house. We walk through the graveyard to get there.

So you take a stroll through a graveyard after dinner? I don't know how you don't expect this to eventually end up being creepy. It could have been anything really. The person in the truck probably wanted to get out and visit a grave but was afraid of the strangers walking around in the graveyard.

Here's a perfectly good example of how this wasn't as creepy as you thought. My wife and her father were taking a shortcut past a graveyard one evening and they see someone struggling at one of the grave sites. This person was buried up to their waist in the ground and looking around. They got a little closer and saw it was an older woman. Somehow this lady was buried up to her waist and she was trying to pull herself out of the ground by holding on to a tombstone. This lady finally sees them and starts moaning and making cries for help.

From their point of view it was some sort of zombie lady trying to escape her grave. There were no cars around or any sign of how the lady had arrived. It turned out that she had parked on the other side of a building and walked over there. The poor lady had two artificial legs and stepped in a small hole and went down losing both of her legs a few feet away. She was too weak to get up on something to sit down and reattach her legs.

Of course it looked strange. Everything looks strange in a graveyard. If they would have been in a grocery store it would have seemed obvious to help the lady. At the cemetery they barely had the courage to even approach an old lady.

Your mind is racing from all the movies you've watched. I think you're worried about nothing.

Worried about nothing? You're a male and more than likely able to pretty much defend yourself in any situation. Please consider your point of view on a subject before advising. As a young woman with a ROUTINE, she should ALWAYS be alert and on guard. Not paranoid, but yes, overly alert in situations like that. These are the "small things" that people realize were *signs* after something bad happens.

OP, bottom line- YOUR GUT IS YOUR BEST FRIEND.

cinema_goddess

Every night my Mom and I go walking for exercise around the same time after supper, around 6:30-7:30. We go to a small back parking lot behind a church near our house. We walk through the graveyard to get there.

So you take a stroll through a graveyard after dinner? I don't know how you don't expect this to eventually end up being creepy. It could have been anything really. The person in the truck probably wanted to get out and visit a grave but was afraid of the strangers walking around in the graveyard.

Here's a perfectly good example of how this wasn't as creepy as you thought. My wife and her father were taking a shortcut past a graveyard one evening and they see someone struggling at one of the grave sites. This person was buried up to their waist in the ground and looking around. They got a little closer and saw it was an older woman. Somehow this lady was buried up to her waist and she was trying to pull herself out of the ground by holding on to a tombstone. This lady finally sees them and starts moaning and making cries for help.

From their point of view it was some sort of zombie lady trying to escape her grave. There were no cars around or any sign of how the lady had arrived. It turned out that she had parked on the other side of a building and walked over there. The poor lady had two artificial legs and stepped in a small hole and went down losing both of her legs a few feet away. She was too weak to get up on something to sit down and reattach her legs.

Of course it looked strange. Everything looks strange in a graveyard. If they would have been in a grocery store it would have seemed obvious to help the lady. At the cemetery they barely had the courage to even approach an old lady.

Your mind is racing from all the movies you've watched. I think you're worried about nothing.

Worried about nothing? You're a male and more than likely able to pretty much defend yourself in any situation. Please consider your point of view on a subject before advising. As a young woman with a ROUTINE, she should ALWAYS be alert and on guard. Not paranoid, but yes, overly alert in situations like that. These are the "small things" that people realize were *signs* after something bad happens.

OP, bottom line- YOUR GUT IS YOUR BEST FRIEND.

But she said she was outside of her routine. So your point is kind of moo.

ecw3780

If you feel afraid, listen to that feeling. It's better to over react, than to under react and end up dead.

j75j75

The Gift of Fear, by Gavin de Becker. Act on your gut, because it's responding to logic that you don't fully have time to process.

Beat me to it!

Good book

kimosabe1

get yourself some mace, a cell phone and new jogging shoes.......

luckyshilling

When I lived in a smaller town something similar happened to me. There was the church out front with a small front lot. It also had a parking lot out back (more of like the church in the center of a lot, but the front lot was larger). Directly, behind the church and the back lot was the original/ old graveyard. Then there was also a new graveyard across the street behind the old graveyard. So road, front lot, church, back lot, old graveyard, cross street, new graveyard. I used to do a loop on a trail that ran from the back lot all around the old graveyard and the new one too. One night this car was parked in the old lot on when I came around from my first loop. It was twilight and I didn't give it much thought. Second loop, still there. Third loop, holy crap he is out of the car and walking toward me. Who is this guy? but never really felt scared, more annoyed than anything.
Then I saw it was a very elderly gentleman who was very pissed off. He starts yelling at me cuz he thinks I am one of the 'kids' he has seen spray painting around here. Once he got close enough to get a good look at me he realized I wasn't one of his hooligans he had been trying to catch. This old guy had appointed himself the graveyards night watchmen against taggers in our town. He apologized for yelling, told me to be careful, and from then on I had my own personal, albeit very aged, body gaurd who watched me from the car.

One key thing though, my gut alarm never really went off. Could be on some level my subconscious told me it was just a nosy old guy in that Lincoln Towncar, or it saw how slow, troubled his walk toward me was and wasn't threatened. So take from that story what you will.

cazzer69

So I had just finished work on some electrics on the church and had got into my truck when these two weird women arrive..
They must have been a bit odd as they came out of the graveyard at 7:30 in the evening.
But what was really weird is they stood and watched me for over a minute.
I got so creeped out I left.

Anyway, I went and got my Bigmac and fries and drove back to the parking lot to eat it and they were still there. Walking round in circles. Told you they were weird.
Anyway, I had already turned into the parking lot. I decided not to stay so I was turning the truck round in a big arc when these two woman take off running for some reason. I looked around but I couldn't see what had spooked them.

Anyway, now they had gone I sat and ate my McDonalds.
I was wondering, should I call the police and get them to check out this parking lot. Their behaviour was definitely odd.


Its all a matter of perspective......

FATJAKE5

It certainly sounds like you were being sized up to me. Predators, animal and human, stalk their prey and size up the risks before making an attack. You should let the police know what happened. Give as much detail as possible so that they will notice this truck if they see it in your area. Little things like a damaged tail light or license plate, cracked window or scratch can help. Be vigilant and persistant, call the PD everytime you see this truck in your area. Remember your instincts protect you. Always trust them. If you feel you are in danger, do whatever you have to do to protect yourself at all times. Changing your routine and not doing the same thing at the same time and place will make you safer.

iWaffle

So I had just finished work on some electrics on the church and had got into my truck when these two weird women arrive..
They must have been a bit odd as they came out of the graveyard at 7:30 in the evening.
But what was really weird is they stood and watched me for over a minute.
I got so creeped out I left.

Anyway, I went and got my Bigmac and fries and drove back to the parking lot to eat it and they were still there. Walking round in circles. Told you they were weird.
Anyway, I had already turned into the parking lot. I decided not to stay so I was turning the truck round in a big arc when these two woman take off running for some reason. I looked around but I couldn't see what had spooked them.

Anyway, now they had gone I sat and ate my McDonalds.
I was wondering, should I call the police and get them to check out this parking lot. Their behaviour was definitely odd.


Its all a matter of perspective......

QFT

supplemama

Carry a cell phone and whip it out next time, be prepared to call the police. Vary your routine, and watch your back. Be very careful and trust your instincts.

Yes, it's likely some guy was planning to prey on you. No one likes to say this but hey, it is not a safe world out there for women. Anywhere.

Is there a safe man you know y'all could walk with for a while?

dorianaldyn

Numerous safety experts have said to go with your instincts if you feel like something isn't right.

That being said, it can be really easy to freak yourself out over nothing. I remember once walking in Berkeley with a friend near campus when we were about 18 and we totally got freaked out and even at the time we could tell we were being ridiculous. But you start to get an adrenaline response and I think that just feeds the fear.

Bownzi

Wow... I agree with many of these people... intuition is given to us to protect us from harm in many cases... i have found that when i listen to it things go well for me yet when i fail to listen to it sometimes bad things happen... you are smart for listening to your intuition..