Office food at a new job

MyChocolateDiet

We have an executive chef here and it's part of the 'office culture' to eat breakfast and lunch at work. When I first started, our chef fixed high calorie foods plus desserts in addition to the meals. Our new chef listened to several requests and it turned out that most people preferred healthier options. So, now we have salads, broiled chicken and fresh fruit versus beef stroganoffs and heavy casseroles.

I understand the peer pressure, especially when it comes from the top. Our CEO is big on the office lunch being our informal networking group. However, I found no problem with taking in my own lunch and regulating my portion sizes. People really don't comment on it and I keep protein shake powder in my desk just in case I really can't stomach the lunch and need to have something to get me through the day. As long as I'm present and contributing to the conversation, what I put into my mouth doesn't matter as much as what comes out of it.

There are simple solutions to everything.

Well, I'm a SAHM, and what I put into my mouth matters a LOT. Just ask my husband. LMFAO! Wow, cold medicine sure makes MFP a whole lot more funnier! Wooo hooo. OTC's!

ctpeace

... Do you have a point, are you just trying to make fun?

What's this "or" business?

Grammar error, and continued antagonism suggesting immaturity, noted. If you pull out "I know you are, but what am I", you will absolutely make my day. Have a good one!

I know you are but what am I.

You're welcome.

That wasn't a grammar error, I was materializing the implied "or" in the quoted part of your post.



Okay then. My point. HR is not there to tell you how to play nice in the informal stuff that goes on in the office. Part of being successful in a grownup job is learning to navigate situations involving informal culture and etiquette and figure them out on your own. There's nothing wrong with asking a co-worker or just watching to see what other people do and learning from that but having to go ask the HR department or some other authority in the company for guidance on whether we should call the boss Mr. Jenkins or Stan or whether we should take the stairs or the elevator shows a lack of grownupness and a lack of ability to handle a grownup job in the real world. Benefits, timekeeping, grievance procedures, dress code, these are things that could be HR questions. What should I eat and when can I use the potty are things that successful people have figured out without having to resort to official channels. People who advance in grownup jobs don't need their hands held through every decision to be made in their career.


Not only that but: I'm rubber, you're glue etc.

Point taken, but at some point, all of those successful people also had to ask questions. That is my point. I only suggested HR because, as a new hire, that might be the person he has had the most contact with. My apologies to all the over-worked HR people out there! You may find this silly, but learning a new office culture can be the difference between success and failure, and it often requires asking questions. I fully understand how it feels to be in your first post-grad school position, and the uncertainty is normal. All I'm saying is that getting clarification and seeking advice are usually seen as strengths, not weaknesses. OP, hopefully your bf has helpful contacts, and I highly suggest he ask. Not every lunch will be the same, and this is actually information that would be helpful for him to know.

anm6c6

My office friends eat out everyday. It was really messing up my diet and expensive. This week I started going with them but I eat when I come back. They've made a few comments about me not eating but I don't care.

drvvork

I will toss my hat in the "just eat what they serve" ring.

1) Its free eats
2) If you are new you may want to do your best to blend in and not become the guy who is too good to eat with us.

I work in construction and I rarely if ever drink and I know that it has cost me jobs because I don't have the face time with the boss at the tavern like everyone else.

If he really does not want to eat the offerings then maybe do the ole, push it around the plate, cover with napkin and toss routine like you did when you were a kid with your broccoli.

I agree with the free eats the push around on the plate thing. It's considered disrespectful to not eat. (A cultural thing) It isn't worth turning a jobs composite of already set standards on its ear - not yet, it may be turned around later but just starting I say nay to bring-your-own. I agree with the healthy snack for later.

08kat

WOW, passive agressive much?

jessupbrady

*carefully steps around and through the various discussions to get to the OP*

Howdy,
You have quite a dilemna and a lot of here's and there's about what your boyfriend should do.

Well, I share his problem. I work with high-profile folk and when we have a business meeting it is ALWAYS at lunch. There is always a conflict of interest in taking care of myself and dining out at the type of establishments they attend.

I do not have an option to bring out my "dishes" since there is no catering. It is always in a restaraunt.

What I prefer to do, eat my lunch before I go. While, at the restaraunt I order a coffee and when the meal approaches an end I have a small desert with everyone.

The bonus to this approach is simply that I get to chat while everyone else is stuffung their face. The high-profile individuals had the opportunity to get to know me.

If they ever did cater, then I would pull out my food to eat with them. No one would really care what was on my plate but rather that I was in attendance.

HardcoreP0rk

I'm kind of shocked that people are suggesting he cave in to "peer pressure" and eat unhealthily! Who cares what they think! I'm pretty sure you can't fire someone for wanting to eat healthy. And if they don't like him for not eating fried chicken, that's pretty ridiculous.

Me too. Honestly, I think this is the perfect white lie scenario. If ever asked, a simple "I have dietary restrictions" seems to shut people right up. It's no one's business, and people are getting better about respecting health privacy. I use this excuse frequently, and if pressed just say "nah, I dont wanna get into it."

Beauty4Ashes2268

Whenever we had catered lunches at my place of employment, I would prepare a plate of food with just about everything(within portion)and then just nibble on it. Once everyone was finished I would still have 2/3 of a plate of food and no one really cared one way or another. I just drank a beverage like sparkling water and just enjoyed getting to know other employees.

DirtyTrickster

Just tell him not to overeat, he may get ridiculed.



#jerkstore

Ashshell

I don't see anything wrong with being yourself and allowing people to get to know your lifestyle. If anything, it would actually strike more personal conversation and it shows strong character to stick to what you want/need when everyone else is doing something different.

twoss9112

but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.

Huh? That's b.s. What about people with strict diet plans dictated medically or people with severe allergies that have to pretty much rely on making and eating their own food all the time. No one can force a person or should ever expect others to eat out of their comfort zone, and I've never seen anyone hold lunch choices against someone in a workplace evaluation.

What if a person is a vegetarian and they order fried chicken - that person would come in with something else and explain that they don't eat meat. Or people who keep kosher, or people who eat vegan... This is the same thing and it's perfectly acceptable.

just_fur_luck

This is why vegetarians never get promoted.

PikaKnight

This is why vegetarians never get promoted.

:laugh:

HardcoreP0rk

My company and clients are always really good about asking for information on dietary restrictions. If my bf can get through sales trips all year long with severe Crohns, I think yours can make it through the office catering maze. It'll be aight

tonyrocks922

My thought is that if they're having Popeye's; own lunch should be fine. If it's truly catered and formal with a client, make wise choices from what's being served. Also, it's entirely appropriate for him to ask his HR contact or the person who hired him what protocol is and how to know which days a packed lunch is ok and which days it isn't. HR people should absolutely be able to help him navigate this issue successfully, and will likely appreciate the fact that he is savvy enough to know that there are etiquette norms, and humble enough realize he's still learning what they are in his new environment. The worst mistake a person can make at a new job is assuming and not clarifying.

Being "the guy who asked HR about lunch protocol" is much worse than being "they guy who doesn't eat with us" FYI.

tonyrocks922

I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.

The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.

If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.

My boyfriend works very closely with the CEO of the company he works for. They are both health nuts and he is always telling me about the lunches they bring while the other employees eat the "catered" lunch. What if they brought in big trays of pasta and you were a celiac and couldn't eat anything? Should you eat it anyways and possibly die later, just to kiss the CEO's bum?

What a ridiculous question.

csfillmore

I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.

The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.

If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.

If its a client/CEO luncheon meeting, I agree with this 100%.

jourdanerin

I would eat what was provided in small portions until he can determine if it would be "frowned upon" for him to bring his own lunch. There are always unhealthy choices for birthdays etc @ my job. There is definitely peer pressure to participate. " Oh, you can have ONE piece of cake". Sure, I could have one piece of cake, then tomorrow it's someone else's birthday, and I have another piece of cake, then it's "administrative professional's day" and I have another piece of cake. By the end of the week you've eaten an entire freaking cake!

It really is a toss up though, maybe his co-workers would respect that he is secure enough to say "no, I don't eat that stuff" and co-mingle but while eating his own healthy lunch.

On the other hand, maybe it is poor etiquette to bring your own lunch when it is being provided for you.

Like I said, eat small portions until he can test the waters and see what would be acceptable.

alsunrise

We have lunch brought in all the time at my job. I normally eat what is brought and focus on healthy meals and snacks the rest of the day.