Comments that get made on MFP about others...
Replies
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Then I will get this off my chest...I see alot of women post BEFORE pics when they are 9 months pregnant and their after pics where they are holding a 2 year old child. I think it's great that they've lost weight after having the child, however if they are counting their highest weight at 9 months pregnant, that's not really the truth because they probably lost 20 the moment they gave birth when the baby and the fluid burst out of them. LOL! I kinda think maybe they should weigh just after having the baby and that's THEIR weight (not plus baby and fluid), and take that as their starting weight. Just an observation though. I guess that could also go for people who get the skin surgery and they take off 20 pounds of skin. Did they really lose it? :sick:
I know right?
Getting fat from being lazy and eating lots of bad food deserves more praise for losing weight than someone who loses weight after 9 months of eating for two, uncontrollable food cravings and inevitable physical body changes.
Uh oh, you did it now. In for all the people who tell you you're not supposed to be eating for two anyway.
I ate for 5 and my daughter was under 5 lbs sooo...
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Then I will get this off my chest...I see alot of women post BEFORE pics when they are 9 months pregnant and their after pics where they are holding a 2 year old child. I think it's great that they've lost weight after having the child, however if they are counting their highest weight at 9 months pregnant, that's not really the truth because they probably lost 20 the moment they gave birth when the baby and the fluid burst out of them. LOL! I kinda think maybe they should weigh just after having the baby and that's THEIR weight (not plus baby and fluid), and take that as their starting weight. Just an observation though. I guess that could also go for people who get the skin surgery and they take off 20 pounds of skin. Did they really lose it? :sick:
I know right?
Getting fat from being lazy and eating lots of bad food deserves more praise for losing weight than someone who loses weight after 9 months of eating for two, uncontrollable food cravings and inevitable physical body changes.
Uh oh, you did it now. In for all the people who tell you you're not supposed to be eating for two anyway.
Ha! I was just thinking the same thing :laugh:0 -
People just want to get their jerk comments in.0
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I agree that people should ideally behave more politely. I've never been one to endorse the open rudeness.
But you might want to consider how much you have made yourself a target if it really bothers you so much. I don't mean by sharing Yo's photos, I meant stating in her photos repeatedly for people to keep negative things and reactions to themselves and then getting very upset when that doesn't happen, posting this thread, etc. I mean, I've never interacted with you on this site but already knew you as "the guy with the body building girlfriend who gets so defensive about her that it seems like he's the one with the issue." Not saying you do, but that's how it comes off.
The best defense is not giving a crap at all and not needing the validation. Can I practice what I preach? Nope, not always, it's tough not to be a little butthurt sometimes. But since this is clearly such an issue for you I say give it a shot.
Also I have seen you and Yo get sooooopp much positive feedback. A seriously huge amount. Focus on that and just move on.0 -
It's rude to make negative comments in a success thread. Posting a success thread doesn't make someone open game to make observations about her hair color. It's not our business. Posting something on the internet doesn't give everyone else the automatic right to make comments without reaction. If you are going to criticize, be prepare for the person you are criticizing to not like it and to respond in kind.
Can someone just answer what the point is in making comments about someone's hair or lack of happiness in a success thread?
Quoted the parts that were particularly meaningful to me.
If someone loses 50 pounds and posts pictures in a success thread, but they are not a bodybuilder, they get congratulations and positive comments like "Oh wow you look amazing! Keep up the great work" (and don't take my comment to mean that I DON'T appreciate those success threads or how hard so many people work to get healthy, everyone I've seen in the success threads has made amazing progress and it DOES impress me) But if someone like Matt/Yo (who I don't know in the slightest) posts about their success, people seem to find it necessary to find SOMETHING to criticize. For example, the comments about her going blond-"she's got an amazing fit body, so let's critique her new hair color." I don't get the attitude regarding someone else's success. If you don't like the body type or look, don't aim for that for yourself. But there is no need to tear someone else down to make yourself feel better. (I'm using a generic "you" here, so this is not aimed at anyone specific--just the general attitude)0 -
peace, love, and lifting.
:flowerforyou:0 -
...I truly feel some comments made on this forum are reflected on the individuals internal emotional issues and battles, on the world around them rather than the way I and/or others look.
Indeed, one can often look at the posters making the comment and their own look, style and dress sense and one gets a good idea of how one may perceive the world around them, their personal self worth and reasoning why they feel the need to come onto a thread where it is nothing but than that of success and happiness and make it about something else, despite repeated demonstrations by others to the opposite.
Comments I regularly see really in the negative sense often on here, are simply best guesses and say more about the poster than making them rather than the subject matter.
Opinions?
I know you are but what am i?0 -
What was said in the success thread was out of order.
But, saying you can make judgements on someone by their appearence in their pictures is like the pot calling the kettle black, no?
As a kettle I find this offensive. Not all of us are black ya know...
I'm a kettle too. Be gentle with me, and everyone else too. Please0 -
Thanks for all the replies everyone, food for thought.0
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But why shouldn't people express opinions? We all want to live in a democracy and never be offended....:noway:
I hope democracy entails more important matters than Yo's hair. But in all seriousness, does this mean you are ok with people giving their opinions about your hair and body? You have an open profile with open pictures. You'll probably say no, because you didn't start a thread about it. But a success thread is not the place for negative opinions, they are pretty accepted as rah rah threads. Again, if Matt or Yo were to start a thread about how Yo's body is the ideal for everyone, that would be the place to voice contrary opinions.
Me too....
If someone makes a comment about my hair colour or how unhappy I look, then I just think "d*ck" and move on with my life.
Who cares as long as you are happy and secure enough in yourself to not let it bring you down. Yo and Matt look pretty happy and as long as they are, surely they can ignore the odd two negative comments out of hundreds of positive ones?
If they chose to focus on the odd negatives and let that bring them down then that's their problem.0 -
I'm still confused about how anyone can know the mental state of someone by a pic. Yawn... Just my 2 cents I guess.
Kind of off the subject, but I find it funny how people that have never been super over weight or obese can judge people that have been. If you haven't been there how can you know what it feels like or know their mental state?
Also tired of people that have to be politically correct all the time as not to offend someone.
See, I'm all over the place. So never mind, you maybe disregard everything I said.
Can I have my 2 cents back. I'm going back to the Waffle taco thread.0 -
Is OP like, MFP famous or something? Everyone talks about them like they know him and his wife? gf? While I'm just sitting here like, who's this dude :huh:
To add something useful, this is the internet. People can say what they feel like to anyone they feel like. Just gotta learn to deal with it/ignore it. May not be fair, but life's a *****, and then you die.0 -
^ ha ha ha
Waffle taco thread was better and funny.0 -
I didn't read other people's posts on here, so forgive me if I'm being redundant.
As someone who has never posted anything to you ever, allow me to give you an honest opinion about the negativity specifically directed at you. It's because you post on behalf of your girlfriend.
If she posted her own threads, she would receive less negativity than she does when you post because 1) people are less inclined to say their awful comments to the person directly, 2) people don't think she is reading their comments so there's an added layer of anonymity and 3) those of us who are mature can figure out that you're being supportive, but people who don't know you think you're bragging, and you're bragging about someone else, which doesn't translate from support and pride very well on the internet.
You're posting something that the vast majority of people are not striving for on this site. Most people joined to lose weight or to maintain average fitness goals, or they're moments from giving up anyway, so they have no clue what goes into what you and your gf do. Take a look at all of the "I'm afraid of being bulky" threads around here and that should tip you off that like 50% of the women on here are scared of looking very muscular, and they can't fathom that a woman actually wants to look that way. Factor in that you post her successes FOR her, and it casts this image that you are more proud of your work training her and that she has very little to say in the matter.
I find the forums to be overwhelmingly positive and helpful. If I wanted to read into the negativity I could find it, of course. But this forum is fast and full of people. It's easy to glaze over all the nice comments and focus on the bitter comments stuck in between.0 -
Holy crap, now theres a bacon thread with a taco made out of bacon. I have tears in my eyes now.
Bacon is positive...0 -
Is OP like, MFP famous or something? Everyone talks about them like they know him and his wife? gf? While I'm just sitting here like, who's this dude :huh:
To add something useful, this is the internet. People can say what they feel like to anyone they feel like. Just gotta learn to deal with it/ignore it. May not be fair, but life's a *****, and then you die.
I'd never heard of them before he filed his complaint....0 -
Please tell Yo from me.. just a person on here losing weight that she has the BEST body I've ever seen doing what she's doing. She is still very feminine and wow those legs! Another thing, I don't always smile perfectly in photos either! She is achieving what she is after with your help and that is what is important. You are so lucky to have a partner that is interested in the same goals. I'd love my man to just want to join the gym with me. I've lost interest now. You two keep it up!
I agree! I haven't seen the success threads but I would like to just to see more pics! I am trying to get hubby to start lifting with me but he won't. He is a cardio bunny. He does make alot of comments about my success, though. i will keep asking and, at some point, he may decide to try.
Keep up the awesome work! Sorry that some people are so negative. If you don't have anything nice to post, don't post!!0 -
I didn't read other people's posts on here, so forgive me if I'm being redundant.
As someone who has never posted anything to you ever, allow me to give you an honest opinion about the negativity specifically directed at you. It's because you post on behalf of your girlfriend.
If she posted her own threads, she would receive less negativity than she does when you post because 1) people are less inclined to say their awful comments to the person directly, 2) people don't think she is reading their comments so there's an added layer of anonymity and 3) those of us who are mature can figure out that you're being supportive, but people who don't know you think you're bragging, and you're bragging about someone else, which doesn't translate from support and pride very well on the internet.
You're posting something that the vast majority of people are not striving for on this site. Most people joined to lose weight or to maintain average fitness goals, or they're moments from giving up anyway, so they have no clue what goes into what you and your gf do. Take a look at all of the "I'm afraid of being bulky" threads around here and that should tip you off that like 50% of the women on here are scared of looking very muscular, and they can't fathom that a woman actually wants to look that way. Factor in that you post her successes FOR her, and it casts this image that you are more proud of your work training her and that she has very little to say in the matter.
I find the forums to be overwhelmingly positive and helpful. If I wanted to read into the negativity I could find it, of course. But this forum is fast and full of people. It's easy to glaze over all the nice comments and focus on the bitter comments stuck in between.
^ this.
feedback comes in all shapes and sizes. if you are going to take the good, you have to take the bad too. it's up to you how much weight you give it and what you do with it.0 -
Please tell Yo from me.. just a person on here losing weight that she has the BEST body I've ever seen doing what she's doing. She is still very feminine and wow those legs! Another thing, I don't always smile perfectly in photos either! She is achieving what she is after with your help and that is what is important. You are so lucky to have a partner that is interested in the same goals. I'd love my man to just want to join the gym with me. I've lost interest now. You two keep it up!
If you don't have anything nice to post, don't post!!
Ever notice how constructive criticism can and is construed as "not being nice" "not being supportive" "being a bully", etc.
This board is so tame in comparison to the rest of the interwebz, but people here take it so seriously.0 -
ridiculous amounts of butt hurt in this thread0
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Please tell Yo from me.. just a person on here losing weight that she has the BEST body I've ever seen doing what she's doing. She is still very feminine and wow those legs! Another thing, I don't always smile perfectly in photos either! She is achieving what she is after with your help and that is what is important. You are so lucky to have a partner that is interested in the same goals. I'd love my man to just want to join the gym with me. I've lost interest now. You two keep it up!
If you don't have anything nice to post, don't post!!
Ever notice how constructive criticism can and is construed as "not being nice" "not being supportive" "being a bully", etc.
This board is so tame in comparison to the rest of the interwebz, but people here take it so seriously.
After suffering through YEARS of "constructive criticism" from the hubby, I can tell you I came to MFP for the nice and supportive stuff!! He has even reformed himself to the much nicer and supportive stuff and my reaction is what he wanted for years. I am actually losing weight and staying consistent. I don't know if I want to look like Yo or if I ever could! But it is nice to have her successes to use as motivation and someone I can ask questions of because I do plan to lift heavier and heavier for the rest of my life! Especially since hubby is telling me it isn't something he thinks I will be able to sustain as I age.0 -
Then I will get this off my chest...I see alot of women post BEFORE pics when they are 9 months pregnant and their after pics where they are holding a 2 year old child. I think it's great that they've lost weight after having the child, however if they are counting their highest weight at 9 months pregnant, that's not really the truth because they probably lost 20 the moment they gave birth when the baby and the fluid burst out of them. LOL! I kinda think maybe they should weigh just after having the baby and that's THEIR weight (not plus baby and fluid), and take that as their starting weight. Just an observation though. I guess that could also go for people who get the skin surgery and they take off 20 pounds of skin. Did they really lose it? :sick:
I know right?
Getting fat from being lazy and eating lots of bad food deserves more praise for losing weight than someone who loses weight after 9 months of eating for two, uncontrollable food cravings and inevitable physical body changes.
Uh oh, you did it now. In for all the people who tell you you're not supposed to be eating for two anyway.
Ha! I was just thinking the same thing :laugh:
As a mommy of 2, I can't help but put in my 2cents...
Eating for 2? No. When a woman gets pregnant, she is supposed to start eating a mere 300 more calories a day than she did before. That's it! Just 300!!
Secondly, the weight gained during pregnancy is the most difficult type of weight to lose. Ask any doctor or trainer. The hormones associated with that type of weight-gain is mind-boggling, and you're not fully recovered from a pregnancy until your baby is one year-old (physically recovered, hormonally, emotionally, all of it).
Thirdly, after having a baby, you look about 6 months pregnant until you're about 2-4 weeks postpartum. With baby, placenta, fluids, blood, etc etc gone, it would be fantastic if you gave birth and instantly lost 20lbs.
It doesn't work that way.
After having a baby, and after the 2-4 week postpartum mark, you generally lose about 5-10lbs from the weight you were the day before having your baby. That's it.
That being said, any one who has never had a child, or been with a woman who had a child, does not know what they're talking about when it comes to said issue...and if after reading this you still don't have respect/are impressed by a woman who lost a lot of weight after baby then you, my friend, are just ignorant. When you hear "pregnancy wrecked my body"-it's NO joke and NO exaggeration.0 -
as a fellow competitor and one who has both posted about and have had my success posted about - yes, in success threads, people don't always get our dreams and goals and decide to tear it down. It is what it is. I don't know those people and they definitely don't know me. So, what they say about me or my body (I've been told I "look like a man" or that I'm "too bulky", lol or that "its gross", etc...) is not my business. I do what I do for ME and I am happy with MY results, so meh to what anyone else says and I'll keep happily doing what I'm doing.
Just my 2 cents.0 -
as a fellow competitor and one who has both posted about and have had my success posted about - yes, in success threads, people don't always get our dreams and goals and decide to tear it down. It is what it is. I don't know those people and they definitely don't know me. So, what they say about me or my body (I've been told I "look like a man" or that I'm "too bulky", lol or that "its gross", etc...) is not my business. I do what I do for ME and I am happy with MY results, so meh to what anyone else says and I'll keep happily doing what I'm doing.
Just my 2 cents.
True. I'll learn to use the ignore button and help those who want to learn
)) 0 -
as a fellow competitor and one who has both posted about and have had my success posted about - yes, in success threads, people don't always get our dreams and goals and decide to tear it down. It is what it is. I don't know those people and they definitely don't know me. So, what they say about me or my body (I've been told I "look like a man" or that I'm "too bulky", lol or that "its gross", etc...) is not my business. I do what I do for ME and I am happy with MY results, so meh to what anyone else says and I'll keep happily doing what I'm doing.
Just my 2 cents.
True. I'll learn to use the ignore button and help those who want to learn))
that's the spirit!! Best of luck to both of you!!0 -
we're all gonna make it brahs0
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as a fellow competitor and one who has both posted about and have had my success posted about - yes, in success threads, people don't always get our dreams and goals and decide to tear it down. It is what it is. I don't know those people and they definitely don't know me. So, what they say about me or my body (I've been told I "look like a man" or that I'm "too bulky", lol or that "its gross", etc...) is not my business. I do what I do for ME and I am happy with MY results, so meh to what anyone else says and I'll keep happily doing what I'm doing.
Just my 2 cents.
True. I'll learn to use the ignore button and help those who want to learn))
It just comes with the territory. Once you cross the line into an "elite "physique, the haters and jealous/nasty comments creep out. Either people are not used to your goal/body and think it's "extreme" or some jealous nerve gets hit and all sorts of nastiness comes out.
Look at all the youtube videos of people with amazing bodies. At least half the comments are extremely negative. Most of them completely unfounded comments coming from people with less than desirable bodies. You see the same thing with other elite pursuits...though I doubt any of them attract as much negativity as bodybuilding and powerlifting.0 -
Matts cool, people get too out of sorts on MFP at the slightest little things. I joke around a lot and maybe too much sometimes. I try not to step on any toes on MFP, but no matter how hard you try there is always defensive minded people or easily offended people or people with no sense of humor. Keep hittin it Matt.0
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Please tell Yo from me.. just a person on here losing weight that she has the BEST body I've ever seen doing what she's doing. She is still very feminine and wow those legs! Another thing, I don't always smile perfectly in photos either! She is achieving what she is after with your help and that is what is important. You are so lucky to have a partner that is interested in the same goals. I'd love my man to just want to join the gym with me. I've lost interest now. You two keep it up!
If you don't have anything nice to post, don't post!!
Ever notice how constructive criticism can and is construed as "not being nice" "not being supportive" "being a bully", etc.
This board is so tame in comparison to the rest of the interwebz, but people here take it so seriously.
After suffering through YEARS of "constructive criticism" from the hubby, I can tell you I came to MFP for the nice and supportive stuff!! He has even reformed himself to the much nicer and supportive stuff and my reaction is what he wanted for years. I am actually losing weight and staying consistent. I don't know if I want to look like Yo or if I ever could! But it is nice to have her successes to use as motivation and someone I can ask questions of because I do plan to lift heavier and heavier for the rest of my life! Especially since hubby is telling me it isn't something he thinks I will be able to sustain as I age.
Well, after seeing the word suffering and constructive criticism in quotes, I doesn't sound very constructive.
Sorry, I've seen it so many times when someone asks for an opinion or "thoughts" on a routine/diet, they don't hear what they want, and pull the bully, mean people card.
Sorry kids, that happens, and it's hilarious.
Dumb question, but don't they have private groups for people who only want the ducky and bunny responses?0 -
Agreed. But damn you for getting this stuck in my head:I didn't read other people's posts on here, so forgive me if I'm being redundant.
As someone who has never posted anything to you ever, allow me to give you an honest opinion about the negativity specifically directed at you. It's because you post on behalf of your girlfriend.
If she posted her own threads, she would receive less negativity than she does when you post because 1) people are less inclined to say their awful comments to the person directly, 2) people don't think she is reading their comments so there's an added layer of anonymity and 3) those of us who are mature can figure out that you're being supportive, but people who don't know you think you're bragging, and you're bragging about someone else, which doesn't translate from support and pride very well on the internet.
You're posting something that the vast majority of people are not striving for on this site. Most people joined to lose weight or to maintain average fitness goals, or they're moments from giving up anyway, so they have no clue what goes into what you and your gf do. Take a look at all of the "I'm afraid of being bulky" threads around here and that should tip you off that like 50% of the women on here are scared of looking very muscular, and they can't fathom that a woman actually wants to look that way. Factor in that you post her successes FOR her, and it casts this image that you are more proud of your work training her and that she has very little to say in the matter.
I find the forums to be overwhelmingly positive and helpful. If I wanted to read into the negativity I could find it, of course. But this forum is fast and full of people. It's easy to glaze over all the nice comments and focus on the bitter comments stuck in between.
^ this.
feedback comes in all shapes and sizes. if you are going to take the good, you have to take the bad too. it's up to you how much weight you give it and what you do with it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_GxXRbSFDg 0
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