A bit of a rant... and maybe a chance to learn?

MireyGal76

Don't worry about her... your doing things right and not taking a short cut! I completely understand your rant. I don't think there is some hidden agenda such as you don't really like your food that your eating or whatever, blah blah blah! Point blank its annoying, because you are doing what you are supposed to. And she's just skipping along taking nothing serious and getting results she doesn't deserve. And you know what keep up your hard work and you will get your results. You will be able to keep the weight off and live a healthy lifestyle. And I guarantee you that she will be right back where she started, she isn't taking weightloss/fitness seriously so she won't get serious results. Be proud of what you are doing, you will get your reward in time.

Thank you for this, and thank you for being a nice person!

Your welcome, and for the very reason that you want to lead a healthy lifestyle please do make sure that most of your calories are coming from food with healthy benefits. I don't care what anyone is saying about a calorie deficit, you want a healthy lifestyle and that doesn't include eating constant junk food. Bigger people lose weight faster, I started at 132ish and I am just now down to 125 and its been close to 3 months since I started my journey. I expected weight to come off super fast, not the case. I'm slow at loosing weight but I'm loosing inches and that makes a huge difference! Weightlifting has played a huge role in that, even more than my cardio! Keep it up, rant all you want, believe me I do it all the time..... its what humans do. But don't give up, you got this!

I won't ever give up. I feel better than I have in years! All from eating right and exercising. It's amazing the change in how you feel, and how your skin looks, and just your overall outlook on life. I should have done this 10 years ago. Thank you again for your genuine response, and for not assuming I'm some horrible person! Sometimes you just have to express what you feel. Since no one in my life understands this journey or how hard it can be (they're all fit and toned!) I assumed I could turn to the community on here.

You can. but you have to remember that this community is FULL of people who busted their *kitten* to get where they are. Some of them eat clean, some paleo, some do keytones, some eat 1200, some eat whatever they want, as long as it fits their calorie budget. Are all these methods "right"... um, not in my opinion. But that's their choice, not mine.

Those people will weigh in and comment.

I am fit, and in good shape. I regularly get the "I'm so disgusted" comments because people see me snacking all day and they "don't understand how" I could "possibly stay in shape, eating like that". It must be because I'm "genetically gifted and have a high metabolism".

They have no idea what I eat and when. They have no idea that when I do my exercise, it's typically an hour of *kitten* busting boxing or running. THEY HAVE NO IDEA.

So when you come here to rant, there will be people who will draw you into their arms and hug you and hold you and kiss away your tears. And there will be others to pass you a kleenex and tell you to get up, quit whining and get moving.

If all you want is comfort, kisses and .. mfp forums are not the best place to look

Note: I'm not trying to be snarky, nor am I trying to be mean.

FranksRumHam

OP sounds hangry.

her salad wasn't very filling, maybe?

methinks you're right.
perhaps she needs some cake.
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm cake

kelbwjax

Don't worry about her... your doing things right and not taking a short cut! I completely understand your rant. I don't think there is some hidden agenda such as you don't really like your food that your eating or whatever, blah blah blah! Point blank its annoying, because you are doing what you are supposed to. And she's just skipping along taking nothing serious and getting results she doesn't deserve. And you know what keep up your hard work and you will get your results. You will be able to keep the weight off and live a healthy lifestyle. And I guarantee you that she will be right back where she started, she isn't taking weightloss/fitness seriously so she won't get serious results. Be proud of what you are doing, you will get your reward in time.

Thank you for this, and thank you for being a nice person!

The one person you consider to be nice just said your friend (who you claim is wonderful) is getting results she doesn't deserve and will gain it all back. THAT'S rude.

We know the kind of "kindness and support" you're looking for. Sorry, most of us just aren't that spiteful to trash someone we don't know to make you feel better about yourself.

The majority of the time this is what happens, it doesn't seem that her friend is making a lifestyle change, simply trying to lose weight. There's quite a difference between the two. But oh well I could be wrong, her friend could be an exception. And can lose weight eating cake her whole life, and if that is what makes her happy and makes her feel good inside and out then more power to her! But the one that posted this topic was ranting, and looking for support. We are all human we all rant, we all need a little motivation to keep up the good work that we are doing even when we see someone else getting there faster for the time being. Nothing I said was untrue. I'm not trying to trash her friend nor anyone else, simply stating what USUALLY happens when people do what her friend is.

JAnundson

Weight loss is about calorie deficit. If hers is bigger than yours then she'll lose more weight. (Being 30 lbs heavier is probably allowing her to lose faster also) I don't necessarily think it means she'll gain it right back. I've lost all of my weight eating a wide variety of foods, including a lot that you'd probably consider junk. I feel like I'm well equipped to deal with real life, because I know how to fit a piece of cake or a couple of pieces of pizza into my goals.

If you're upset with your salad and water maybe you should consider adding a bit of treat food. I do the 80/20 approach-- 80% of my food goes toward meeting my macros and micros. 20% goes to treats. It's worked well for me. The best plan is the one you can stick to.

I hate to start by quoting someone from my FL, but yet I love it at the same time! 's to her.

Thanks. s back to you.


OP I really was not trying to be unkind at all. I actually didn't realize this was in the "motivation/support" section or I probably would not have responded, but you did seem to be asking why your friend is able to eat foods she loves and still lose weight and your post title suggested that you were willing to learn.

I also take issue with the idea that people who eat food they enjoy are doomed to gain back their weight or are taking a short cut somehow. I realize that you didn't claim either of those things in your OP but the first few posters did and that's why I responded. I follow IIFYM-- if it fits your macros. My food is a good mixture of "healthy" food and treats (mostly the former, because otherwise I'd never fit my macros). The idea that somehow not eating any treat food at all (or only eating it very occasionally) is more virtuous and that people who eat that way are more deserving of their results is not a philosophy to which I subscribe.

At any rate, now that you've clarified that you were only interested in ranting and you weren't really asking a question at all, I realize that you don't want to hear any more. Good luck with reaching all of your goals. :flowerforyou:

You were not unkind, thank you for your response. I really wasn't trying to be unkind when speaking of my friend, either. This honestly was a "I'm frustrated because I see this, and I feel like this, has anyone else felt the same way" kind of thread. I wasn't expecting some of the responses, that's all. Thank you again.

salcha76

I understand your frustration....BUT...its really not your business. stay on track with what you are doing....I'm certain deep down inside you know your salad is better for you any day than her fast food....it'll catch up to her....and the rewards will catch up to you:)

MyChocolateDiet

Don't worry about her... your doing things right and not taking a short cut! I completely understand your rant. I don't think there is some hidden agenda such as you don't really like your food that your eating or whatever, blah blah blah! Point blank its annoying, because you are doing what you are supposed to. And she's just skipping along taking nothing serious and getting results she doesn't deserve. And you know what keep up your hard work and you will get your results. You will be able to keep the weight off and live a healthy lifestyle. And I guarantee you that she will be right back where she started, she isn't taking weightloss/fitness seriously so she won't get serious results. Be proud of what you are doing, you will get your reward in time.

Thank you for this, and thank you for being a nice person!

Your welcome, and for the very reason that you want to lead a healthy lifestyle please do make sure that most of your calories are coming from food with healthy benefits. I don't care what anyone is saying about a calorie deficit, you want a healthy lifestyle and that doesn't include eating constant junk food. Bigger people lose weight faster, I started at 132ish and I am just now down to 125 and its been close to 3 months since I started my journey. I expected weight to come off super fast, not the case. I'm slow at loosing weight but I'm loosing inches and that makes a huge difference! Weightlifting has played a huge role in that, even more than my cardio! Keep it up, rant all you want, believe me I do it all the time..... its what humans do. But don't give up, you got this!

I won't ever give up. I feel better than I have in years! All from eating right and exercising. It's amazing the change in how you feel, and how your skin looks, and just your overall outlook on life. I should have done this 10 years ago. Thank you again for your genuine response, and for not assuming I'm some horrible person! Sometimes you just have to express what you feel. Since no one in my life understands this journey or how hard it can be (they're all fit and toned!) I assumed I could turn to the community on here.

You can. but you have to remember that this community is FULL of people who busted their *kitten* to get where they are. Some of them eat clean, some paleo, some do keytones, some eat 1200, some eat whatever they want, as long as it fits their calorie budget. Are all these methods "right"... um, not in my opinion. But that's their choice, not mine.

Those people will weigh in and comment.

I am fit, and in good shape. I regularly get the "I'm so disgusted" comments because people see me snacking all day and they "don't understand how" I could "possibly stay in shape, eating like that". It must be because I'm "genetically gifted and have a high metabolism".

They have no idea what I eat and when. They have no idea that when I do my exercise, it's typically an hour of *kitten* busting boxing or running. THEY HAVE NO IDEA.

So when you come here to rant, there will be people who will draw you into their arms and hug you and hold you and kiss away your tears. And there will be others to pass you a kleenex and tell you to get up, quit whining and get moving.

If all you want is comfort, kisses and .. mfp forums are not the best place to look

Note: I'm not trying to be snarky, nor am I trying to be mean.

Just wanted to point out which one I am so you know when to read my stuff. Not when you are lying on the floor in a puddle like we all get sometimes, but later when you are ready to regroup and spank her *kitten* at weight loss!

Way2slk

I eat 6 times a day and I have lost 26 pounds in a little over a month. The fact that I was eating TOO few calories was proven to me. Can you believe that???? TOO FEW Calories?? I was doing about 1000 a day and my body said, "Screw that big boy you are trying to starve me, so I will store whatever you send my way and turn to fat stores" I gained 3 punds that week. Then next week I increased my intake up to close to about 1500 and I lost 8 pounds that week. Every 2-3 hours I am eating something good, no starches, no beans, corn, peas, carrots. I eat green veggies, eggs, chicken beef fish, cottage cheese etc. I am watching the carbs and the fat so I am reading the labels. Lunch I do a couple of morningstar veggies burgers (pizza basil or mushroom lover), celery, cucumber, radishes, dill pickles and under 300 calories and am burning fat. Don't skip meals and drink tons of water.
Hang in there and wish me luck too.

Krys_140

I won't ever give up. I feel better than I have in years! All from eating right and exercising. It's amazing the change in how you feel, and how your skin looks, and just your overall outlook on life. I should have done this 10 years ago. Thank you again for your genuine response, and for not assuming I'm some horrible person! Sometimes you just have to express what you feel. Since no one in my life understands this journey or how hard it can be (they're all fit and toned!) I assumed I could turn to the community on here.

All the responses you got here, and THIS is what you got out of them? That they were calling you a horrible person?

I've read all of the responses, and truly, it was only after your post calling everyone mean that people began to turn on you.

Who were you hoping would learn something? US? It certainly appears that YOU weren't hoping to get anything out of this thread other than someone singing you soft kitty.

Having said THAT... I GET IT. You work hard, and you expect results. You see others doing something different from what you're doing, and you assume they're doing it wrong. Try not to focus on what she's about, and keep your chin up because of what YOU'RE about.

jofjltncb6

In...

...to re-read later to try to figure out which one is truly "dieting" and which one is "lifestyle changing." I think I may have those confused at the moment.

CorvusCorax77

In...

...to re-read later to try to figure out which one is truly "dieting" and which one is "lifestyle changing." I think I may have those confused at the moment.

Ok. So I just read most of this thread and I actually am kind of offended with how some people refer to this girl as not putting in any effort and not making any changes. If she lost a lot more weight, then she is obviously doing something right. I also think that in terms of who is more likely to "bounce back" might be the one who is only eating salads and being bitter about it.

A lifestyle change is something that is sustainable.

I lost between 40-50 lbs (depending on if you include the 8 lbs of muscle mass I gained as weight not lost) and I did it while eating pizza. I had chocolate every day. I sometimes had TWO cheese (veggie) burgers for dinner and I ate pie. I also ran my *kitten* off and kept a balance between what I was eating and what I was doing. Some days I ate less calories, some days I ate more.

In the past I have lost 30 lbs doing a strict "healthy food" way of going, and it wasn't sustainable. I bounced right back. For me, the lifestyle change was figuring out balance, not forcing myself to give up things I liked to eat.

ETA: it's been almost 3 years now that I have kept the weight off.

Mr_Bad_Example

So, this is a bit of a rant. A friend of mine at work started "dieting" the same time I did. Although for me, I'm not dieting. I'm changing my life habits. Anyway, she still eats like crap. I mean, TOTAL CRAP. And at this point, she has lost more weight than me. Granted, she IS bigger than me, but only by about 30 pounds. I see her eating fast food and cake and drinking soda, and I'm over here with my salad and water being all annoyed. I mean, how does that happen? I work my *kitten* off 4 times a week for 90 minutes training with a personal trainer, and she leisurely goes to the gym 3 times a week and does 20 minutes on the treadmill. UGH. Am I missing something here??

Maybe she's doing it right and you're doing it wrong.

FranksRumHam

So, this is a bit of a rant. A friend of mine at work started "dieting" the same time I did. Although for me, I'm not dieting. I'm changing my life habits. Anyway, she still eats like crap. I mean, TOTAL CRAP. And at this point, she has lost more weight than me. Granted, she IS bigger than me, but only by about 30 pounds. I see her eating fast food and cake and drinking soda, and I'm over here with my salad and water being all annoyed. I mean, how does that happen? I work my *kitten* off 4 times a week for 90 minutes training with a personal trainer, and she leisurely goes to the gym 3 times a week and does 20 minutes on the treadmill. UGH. Am I missing something here??

Maybe she's doing it right and you're doing it wrong.

impossible...OP eats salad.

MireyGal76

OP Deactivated.

/endthread