What are women competeing for?
BusyRaeNOTBusty
Posts: 7,166 Member
in Chit-Chat
In response to the catty women thread (and yes, I felt the need to start a new thread as that one had been derailed).
I love this quote:
from here:
http://fitandfeminist.wordpress.com/2013/03/12/woman-on-woman-jealousy-worst-motivator-ever-or-worst-motivator-ever/
However the solution to "catty women" isn't to write off 51% of the population from potential friend-hood, it's to actually make more female friends. Find women who that share your interests. Friend the lady who is the target of other's catty-ness. Support other women professionally, academically, in sports and fitness, etc. We face enough hardships from men (like the dude who doesn't like to hire women in the other thread), we don't need to fight amongst ourselves.
I love this quote:
I mean, what were we competing for? Attention from guys? Like that was some kind of super-rare commodity, like we all are living on Mars and male attention is oxygen, and the only way we could survive is if a guy wanted to have sex with us? It sounds stupid, but I realized that was basically the paradigm under which I was operating. What’s more, I realized that this wasn’t just unique to me, that it was girl-on-girl competition was fostered all over our culture, that it was pretty much a given that women were going to be jealous. As Jay-Z put it, “Males shouldn’t be jealous, that’s a female trait.”
The whole notion of jealousy arises from this idea of scarcity, that there’s only so many crumbs of attention and power and sex to go around, and so we should do what we can to get as much of it as possible lest we get screwed out of getting any at all. In the process, we end up screwed anyway, because we get so wrapped up in trying to get one over each other that we fail to notice that we are in fact fighting over crumbs.
from here:
http://fitandfeminist.wordpress.com/2013/03/12/woman-on-woman-jealousy-worst-motivator-ever-or-worst-motivator-ever/
However the solution to "catty women" isn't to write off 51% of the population from potential friend-hood, it's to actually make more female friends. Find women who that share your interests. Friend the lady who is the target of other's catty-ness. Support other women professionally, academically, in sports and fitness, etc. We face enough hardships from men (like the dude who doesn't like to hire women in the other thread), we don't need to fight amongst ourselves.
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Replies
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Absolutely. Personally I know my looks will fade, but my leg press won't mwahahaha! *kisses her guns*We face enough hardships from men (like the dude who doesn't like to hire women in the other thread), we don't need to fight amongst ourselves.0 -
Everything is a competition.0
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I don't want to compete against pretty women. What does it matter who's prettier/better/faster/sexier? It doesn't.
Also, I just like to hang out with hot chicks.0 -
I don't worry about it; the air is thin up here at the top.
Only the strong survive.0 -
TOPIC: What are women competeing for?
taunto0 -
I am not in a competition with anyone else. I run my own race.
I have no desire to play the game of being better than everyone else around me, in any way, shape or form.
I just aim to improve, to become a better person than I was.
That's me and...
I am free.0 -
To win?0
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I don't want to compete against pretty women. What does it matter who's prettier/better/faster/sexier? It doesn't.
Also, I just like to hang out with hot chicks.
why not? You're pretty. Also, I don't compete, but I love that pic, OP! I saw it in the catty women thread, too. “Compete with yourself. There is no reason to be jealous of anyone else. I say we congratulate and motivate, rather than hate.” ~ Bry Allen0 -
Opps. I meant as far as why are "we" catty. We can compete in sports all we want. :flowerforyou:0
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Who knows. I was just discussing this with a girlfriend on here. I appreciate and enjoy my girlfriends. Have I had bad experiences with cattiness and whatnot? Sure, but I have had betrayal and such from males, too.
My rules for friendship are simple, be good to each other, eliminate drama, and always protect each other. :flowerforyou:0 -
Guys compete all the time too.0
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What I learned today:
It's catty, not caddy.
Thank you.0 -
Guys compete all the time too.
True0 -
I don't want to compete against pretty women. What does it matter who's prettier/better/faster/sexier? It doesn't.
Also, I just like to hang out with hot chicks.
why not? You're pretty. Also, I don't compete, but I love that pic, OP! I saw it in the catty women thread, too. “Compete with yourself. There is no reason to be jealous of anyone else. I say we congratulate and motivate, rather than hate.” ~ Bry Allen
+1 because you just quoted yourself. And that is awesome.0 -
Guys compete all the time too.
True. But they seem to do it without being so hateful. If 2 men are competing for attention from the same woman and one man "wins" it, they can still be friends. Or if one man is particularly more attractive to than others they generally don't hate him for it.0 -
I feel like I should go start some bro love thread now as I don't have enough male friends . . . :laugh:
Seriously though, I never understand people (men or women) saying they don't like people of the same gender. I think it's a warning sign.0 -
Who knows. I was just discussing this with a girlfriend on here. I appreciate and enjoy my girlfriends. Have I had bad experiences with cattiness and whatnot? Sure, but I have had betrayal and such from males, too.
My rules for friendship are simple, be good to each other, eliminate drama, and always protect each other. :flowerforyou:
YES! I cut out friends that are dramalicious, whether they are male OR female. I don't care what gender you are, be my friend, have my back, and I'll do the same for you.0 -
I love this post. Thank you. I'm not into that crap at all....
Even in competitive sports, you are in it together or else there is no game.
I'm a big fan of awesomeness, like OP.0 -
Men compete too. Get over it.0
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Guys compete all the time too.
True. But they seem to do it without being so hateful. If 2 men are competing for attention from the same woman and one man "wins" it, they can still be friends. Or if one man is particularly more attractive to than others they generally don't hate him for it.
Not entirely true. D-bags do exist. I don't think it's gender specific.0 -
Men are jealous too. Nothing makes men crazier than women. They fight over them, do other stupid things, end up in jail, etc. Romance is the largest cause of drama in both sexes. Women do seem to hold grudges longer though.0
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Guys compete all the time too.
True. But they seem to do it without being so hateful. If 2 men are competing for attention from the same woman and one man "wins" it, they can still be friends. Or if one man is particularly more attractive to than others they generally don't hate him for it.
Not entirely true. D-bags do exist. I don't think it's gender specific.
Just wanted to out-quote you.0 -
I compete.
I compete with myself.
Sometimes I lose with yesterday me, and it makes me grit my teeth and try harder...sometimes I win and I feel on top of the *kitten* world.
Why would I really need to compete with anyone else when I give myself those feelings?0 -
I don't want to compete against pretty women. What does it matter who's prettier/better/faster/sexier? It doesn't.
Also, I just like to hang out with hot chicks.
why not? You're pretty. Also, I don't compete, but I love that pic, OP! I saw it in the catty women thread, too. “Compete with yourself. There is no reason to be jealous of anyone else. I say we congratulate and motivate, rather than hate.” ~ Bry Allen
+1 because you just quoted yourself. And that is awesome.
I know. I'm a dork, but I kinda really love that quote....0 -
I dunno [b:tches be cray cray], no one is going to beat me on the healing meters. That's all I have to say about this.0
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Definitely not spelling competitions.0
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I don't worry about it; the air is thin up here at the top.
Only the strong survive.
you think it's thin where you are... try being 6'1 and sporting 4" heels... I'm not ditzy, I'm just oxygen deprived.0 -
Chocolate. Other women be trying to eat chocolate when clearly it all belongs to me.
I'm also competing against men for chocolate.0 -
I don't worry about it; the air is thin up here at the top.
Only the strong survive.
you think it's thin where you are... try being 6'1 and sporting 4" heels... I'm not ditzy, I'm just oxygen deprived.
The metaphorical air at the metaphorical top.
Oxygen deprivation is no joke!0 -
Definitely not spelling competitions.
Damn it man. The Firefox spell check squiggly doesn't show up for the tittle.0
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