What are women competeing for?

BusyRaeNOTBusty

In response to the catty women thread (and yes, I felt the need to start a new thread as that one had been derailed).

I love this quote:

I mean, what were we competing for? Attention from guys? Like that was some kind of super-rare commodity, like we all are living on Mars and male attention is oxygen, and the only way we could survive is if a guy wanted to have sex with us? It sounds stupid, but I realized that was basically the paradigm under which I was operating. What’s more, I realized that this wasn’t just unique to me, that it was girl-on-girl competition was fostered all over our culture, that it was pretty much a given that women were going to be jealous. As Jay-Z put it, “Males shouldn’t be jealous, that’s a female trait.”

The whole notion of jealousy arises from this idea of scarcity, that there’s only so many crumbs of attention and power and sex to go around, and so we should do what we can to get as much of it as possible lest we get screwed out of getting any at all. In the process, we end up screwed anyway, because we get so wrapped up in trying to get one over each other that we fail to notice that we are in fact fighting over crumbs.

from here:
http://fitandfeminist.wordpress.com/2013/03/12/woman-on-woman-jealousy-worst-motivator-ever-or-worst-motivator-ever/


However the solution to "catty women" isn't to write off 51% of the population from potential friend-hood, it's to actually make more female friends. Find women who that share your interests. Friend the lady who is the target of other's catty-ness. Support other women professionally, academically, in sports and fitness, etc. We face enough hardships from men (like the dude who doesn't like to hire women in the other thread), we don't need to fight amongst ourselves.

SerenaFisher

We face enough hardships from men (like the dude who doesn't like to hire women in the other thread), we don't need to fight amongst ourselves.

Absolutely. Personally I know my looks will fade, but my leg press won't mwahahaha! *kisses her guns*

_DaniD_

Everything is a competition.

JessieJanie

I don't want to compete against pretty women. What does it matter who's prettier/better/faster/sexier? It doesn't.



Also, I just like to hang out with hot chicks.

1ConcreteGirl

I don't worry about it; the air is thin up here at the top.

Only the strong survive.

taunto

TOPIC: What are women competeing for?

taunto

laughingdani

I am not in a competition with anyone else. I run my own race.
I have no desire to play the game of being better than everyone else around me, in any way, shape or form.
I just aim to improve, to become a better person than I was.
That's me and...
I am free.

diodelcibo

To win?

IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym

I don't want to compete against pretty women. What does it matter who's prettier/better/faster/sexier? It doesn't.



Also, I just like to hang out with hot chicks.

why not? You're pretty. Also, I don't compete, but I love that pic, OP! I saw it in the catty women thread, too. “Compete with yourself. There is no reason to be jealous of anyone else. I say we congratulate and motivate, rather than hate.” ~ Bry Allen

BusyRaeNOTBusty

Opps. I meant as far as why are "we" catty. We can compete in sports all we want. :flowerforyou:

DarkAngel262

Who knows. I was just discussing this with a girlfriend on here. I appreciate and enjoy my girlfriends. Have I had bad experiences with cattiness and whatnot? Sure, but I have had betrayal and such from males, too.

My rules for friendship are simple, be good to each other, eliminate drama, and always protect each other. :flowerforyou:

Timshel_

Guys compete all the time too.

odusgolp

What I learned today:

It's catty, not caddy.




Thank you.

SoViLicious

Guys compete all the time too.

True

DalekBrittany

I don't want to compete against pretty women. What does it matter who's prettier/better/faster/sexier? It doesn't.



Also, I just like to hang out with hot chicks.

why not? You're pretty. Also, I don't compete, but I love that pic, OP! I saw it in the catty women thread, too. “Compete with yourself. There is no reason to be jealous of anyone else. I say we congratulate and motivate, rather than hate.” ~ Bry Allen

+1 because you just quoted yourself. And that is awesome.

BusyRaeNOTBusty

Guys compete all the time too.

True. But they seem to do it without being so hateful. If 2 men are competing for attention from the same woman and one man "wins" it, they can still be friends. Or if one man is particularly more attractive to than others they generally don't hate him for it.

BeachIron

I feel like I should go start some bro love thread now as I don't have enough male friends . . . :laugh:

Seriously though, I never understand people (men or women) saying they don't like people of the same gender. I think it's a warning sign.

chixyb

Who knows. I was just discussing this with a girlfriend on here. I appreciate and enjoy my girlfriends. Have I had bad experiences with cattiness and whatnot? Sure, but I have had betrayal and such from males, too.

My rules for friendship are simple, be good to each other, eliminate drama, and always protect each other. :flowerforyou:

YES! I cut out friends that are dramalicious, whether they are male OR female. I don't care what gender you are, be my friend, have my back, and I'll do the same for you.

CorvusCorax77

I love this post. Thank you. I'm not into that crap at all....

Even in competitive sports, you are in it together or else there is no game.

I'm a big fan of awesomeness, like OP.

whierd

Men compete too. Get over it.

BeachIron

Guys compete all the time too.

True. But they seem to do it without being so hateful. If 2 men are competing for attention from the same woman and one man "wins" it, they can still be friends. Or if one man is particularly more attractive to than others they generally don't hate him for it.

Not entirely true. D-bags do exist. I don't think it's gender specific.