"the talk"

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  • TedStout
    TedStout Posts: 241
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    Two boys. Was really awkward but useful I think. Just my opinion but its not about "what goes where and why" but more a chance to talk about sex from an emotional perpective. IMHO.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    How will I explain sex to my child?

    HBO

    She'll just dry hump everything and think she's having sex.

    tumblr_me43rbslHg1rad8gu.gif
  • jkandktmom
    jkandktmom Posts: 1,010 Member
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    Basically: Insert Flap A into SLot B repeatedly until Flap A pukes a little

    Or in your case A LOT!
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
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    How will I explain sex to my child?

    HBO

    She'll just dry hump everything and think she's having sex.

    tumblr_me43rbslHg1rad8gu.gif

    No, that's what happens if she watches MTV. Also, I want that gif on a t-shirt.
  • TedStout
    TedStout Posts: 241
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    I've got 2 boys. "The talk" was:

    Close your door.
    Flush your tissues.
    Let mom continue to live in the world in her head where HER boys don't do this.

    But in all seriousness - one time my eldest asked me "so what makes the white stuff come out?" I started into an explanation of nerve endings, pleasure receptors, emotional factors, all leading up tot he moment of ..

    he says "no no no. which muscle pushes it out?"

    Ohhhhhh!! an easy question!! Ok so there's this series of sphincters ...

    Laugh! LAUGH! GUffffaaahhhh!

    Two boys...I can relate.
  • leahestey
    leahestey Posts: 124 Member
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    If my kids ask me questions, I tell them straight up what's what. It was much easier when I got pregnant with my last one. I explained that it takes a daddy and a mommy to make a baby and mommy's belly is the house for a while. They know the different ways a bay can come out (I have had both c-sections and natural births). If they ask more specifically how it happens, I will tell them. I also make sure that they know whatever they chose to do, I still love them. (Not that I WANT anything to happen too early)
  • operation_cute
    operation_cute Posts: 588 Member
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    If their young, answer questions as they ask them no more no less, and be honest. If their older and you think its time, wait for something on tv that could bring up the topic, its easier if they think its just a conversation your having because of what their watching than if you said come here its time for "the talk" The goal is to open the topic, and let them understand its normal, (without saying its normal, that just instantly makes kids uncomfortable lol) and that they can say anything, and come to you for anything.
  • traceytwink
    traceytwink Posts: 538 Member
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    We have always been open and honest about sex we have never been embarrassed even when my son was talking about mastebation and asked if girls help boys to do it we said yes when your older they will then he turned to me and asked do you do it to daddy ????, we have always been of the opinion that if they ask tell them what they want to know, they will soon say when they've had enough information, we've told our kids to try and wait until at least 16 and to sure they use a condom, I've said if they are embarrassed to buy them I will get them, don't make sex a taboo because they will hide things from you then, my daughter has been asking a sorts of questions from a young age and can't wait to start her period (she will regret wanting it when it comes lol) but she knows what to do and is prepared for when it comes unlike a lot of her friends good luck with your chat and just let your child lead it xx
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    Yeah, my parents didn't initiate that talk with my sister or me, just my brother.

    My sister is the type who feels absolutely no shame in asking all the embarrassing questions, though, so she eventually just asked my mom everything she wanted to know.

    True to form, I learned about sex from a book at the library, and I asked my brother some stuff. One time I was doing laundry, and I found a condom in his pants, and I didn't tell anyone because we had each other's backs. But I told him if he got some girl pregnant, Mom would probably chop off his penis, and he explained how condoms worked.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    I don't have kids, but my dad just asked me one day if we needed to have the talk. I was going out to a shopping centre with two girls, so fair dos. I declined, however.
  • CindyRip
    CindyRip Posts: 166 Member
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    I had a set of books that was set up on age appropriate topics. Early years read more like a story, and it had parental advice in the back. I just went to get the name for you and I guess the last person to borrow them forgot to return them. I think a lot of my kids friends learned from these books and my kids. They would hear stuff and come to my house to find out if it was true, many just asked me outright but some had my kids ask me and others just asked for the books. I never gave out age inappropriate information unless they had heard something somewhere else and then I kept it to the simplest explanation that I could. If kids feel they can talk about this at anytime they have a tendency to only ask the questions they want to know about at the time. I kept the talks light hearted and answered honestly if I did not know something.
  • backpacker44
    backpacker44 Posts: 160 Member
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    My parents never had "the talk" with me. I learned through friends and school....and I think I turned out just fine. :happy: But in today's society, it's probably better to discuss it, however awkward it may be.

    Same here. I learned about sex and things at school wayyyy before my mom ever thought I'd need to know about it.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    I plan on just talking about sex in age appropriate ways throughout her life so it's not this BIG deal. Bodies and sex are nothing to be ashamed of.
  • jill604
    jill604 Posts: 21 Member
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    I don't even remember when my mom talked to me about sex. It was never awkward talking to her. I would have to say in the beginning it was definitely more about the basics of how babies were made etc. It wasn't until I got a little older that we talked in detail (orgasms etc.) but I think you just have to be comfortable with your kids, don't go into too much detail early in their lives and trust that they'll be smart about future decisions when it comes to sex.
  • chesq77
    chesq77 Posts: 270 Member
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    ive never gotten the talk before...my dad sometime finds my condom boxes when hes putting my laundry away, he looks at me and wink haha thats the only response ive ever gotten
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
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    7d70d2dcc1ad2ffd58e884a5a30f61e3.jpg
  • josavage
    josavage Posts: 472 Member
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    My ex told our son that he couldn't have any more kids because he got fixed, kind of like the dog. My son, completely shocked, said "you got your balls cut off?" So then I had to have the talk. I bought a very good book and I told him we could read it together or he could read it by himself and ask me questions. He chose to read it on his own and he did ask questions. His school also gave a pretty good talk to the kids and he seemed to understand a lot more after that. I think the book was in 3rd grade and the school talk was in 5th.
  • wbandel
    wbandel Posts: 530 Member
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    My mom was the school nurse. She'd show us two or three videos and ask us which one was more interesting to show the students. XD She also gave us a book that we'd flip through from time to time, but really you don't need much after watching a billion sex ed vids.
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
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    not sure if there is any way that isn't awkward.
    all my mom told me was if i had sex i was going to hell, never got a talk from my parents.
    i would just tell them how it is, don't assume schools will teach anything.
    maybe when they're in middle school or hitting puberty, lay out the facts to them. promot abstenence but make sure you teach them about safe sex so they do know if they do end up being sexually active. you don't want them learning things from their friends.
    maybe have them listen to let's talk about sex by salt n peppa. just kidding.
  • ChanceTakr2131
    ChanceTakr2131 Posts: 96
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    I have a 10 year old and a five year old, and I've only had "the talk" with my older one, obviously. My mom gave me a book and told me she lost her virginity at 15. That's it!! So, what I have done is explained puberty to my daughter and then told her some very basic things about sex, nothing too graphic and I used the appropriate terminology. I also explained that her friends would tell her things that might not necessarily be true, so she could always come to me if she has questions. I bring up the subject of boys and puberty every now and then to keep an OPEN DIALOGUE. That is very important because it helps them feel more comfortable and us because, let's face it, sex is not an easy subject to discuss with a child! As she gets older, I'm not going to put any restrictions on sex, but I am going to ask her to be honest with me and use caution. Maybe I'm not very conventional, but I wish my parents had been more lax about it instead of telling me "it's okay for your brother to have sex at 14, but not you!!" So guess who lost their virginity at 14? Yours truly. That's not what I want for my kids.

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