calling all cleansers/detoxers...

ndj1979

So I am curious what you all's favorite cleanse/detox is...as I am interested in cleansing myself. Please list the cleanse/detox method you use, what toxins it is removing, what the benefits are, and any additional comments that you would like to add...

thanks in advance!

chrisdavey

I did the aspartame cleanse. Eat and drink only things that contain aspartame. I just drank litres of diet coke and chewed gum all day long. I feel so much better, my liver and kidney sent me a letter to say they were happy with me, my skin is clearer, I lost 5lbs of fat and gained 5lbs of muscle and put 10lbs on my bench 1rm. I say go for it!

JacksMom12

I did the aspartame cleanse. Eat and drink only things that contain aspartame. I just drank litres of diet coke and chewed gum all day long. I feel so much better, my liver and kidney sent me a letter to say they were happy with me, my skin is clearer, I lost 5lbs of fat and gained 5lbs of muscle and put 10lbs on my bench 1rm. I say go for it!

Lolz. But you forgot to tell us WHICH toxins it removed, like the OP asked.

cmriverside

You mean like my yummy L'Occitane Milk Soap? That kind of cleanse? You have to use it every day on all your external parts.

phjorg1

there is no such thing as a detox program.

Or that is to say, your liver already does detoxing for you. So you're already set for life. Perma detox program baby. All the other crap that people try and sell you is just to make money, but actually does nothing useful at best, and messes with your hormone levels at worst.

If you want a fun time, ask those what toxins exactly are being detoxed that otherwise would not be. An indicator of BS will be their inability to answer.

chrisdavey

I did the aspartame cleanse. Eat and drink only things that contain aspartame. I just drank litres of diet coke and chewed gum all day long. I feel so much better, my liver and kidney sent me a letter to say they were happy with me, my skin is clearer, I lost 5lbs of fat and gained 5lbs of muscle and put 10lbs on my bench 1rm. I say go for it!

Lolz. But you forgot to tell us WHICH toxins it removed, like the OP asked.

all the bad ones, clearly

Joehenny

I did the aspartame cleanse. Eat and drink only things that contain aspartame. I just drank litres of diet coke and chewed gum all day long. I feel so much better, my liver and kidney sent me a letter to say they were happy with me, my skin is clearer, I lost 5lbs of fat and gained 5lbs of muscle and put 10lbs on my bench 1rm. I say go for it!

Lolz. But you forgot to tell us WHICH toxins it removed, like the OP asked.

all the bad ones, clearly

STRONG

michelle7673

I like those Tide capsules. I grease 'em up good with virgin coconut oil from Shangri-La and they go down beautifully.
This has reduced my toxic sarcasm to (almost) zero.

ndj1979

I like those Tide capsules. I grease 'em up good with virgin coconut oil from Shangri-La and they go down beautifully.
This has reduced my toxic sarcasm to (almost) zero.

why would you want to reduce sarcasm?

ndj1979

I did the aspartame cleanse. Eat and drink only things that contain aspartame. I just drank litres of diet coke and chewed gum all day long. I feel so much better, my liver and kidney sent me a letter to say they were happy with me, my skin is clearer, I lost 5lbs of fat and gained 5lbs of muscle and put 10lbs on my bench 1rm. I say go for it!

Lolz. But you forgot to tell us WHICH toxins it removed, like the OP asked.

all the bad ones, clearly

STRONG

you got a list handy?

ILiftHeavyAcrylics

I do the chocolate cleanse pretty much daily. It rids me of . . . chocolate cravings. :bigsmile:

ndj1979

I heard if you drink nothing but raspberry ketones for a week, that you can increase muscle gains and burn body fat...any truth to that?

MinMin97

Serious requests only!

ndj1979

I do the chocolate cleanse pretty much daily. It rids me of . . . chocolate cravings. :bigsmile:

chocolate cleanse..does that involve a lot exlax and toilet time?

sgrubby

I swear by the Clorox cleanse, You drink 3 cups of bleach with a tablespoon of grade B maple syrup, kumquat juice and tabasco sauce. It cleans you right out.

Joehenny

I swear by the Clorox cleanse, You drink 3 cups of bleach with a tablespoon of grade B maple syrup, kumquat juice and tabasco sauce. It cleans you right out.

Thanks, will try soon

ndj1979

I swear by the Clorox cleanse, You drink 3 cups of bleach with a tablespoon of grade B maple syrup, kumquat juice and tabasco sauce. It cleans you right out.

i think that is what I do to my AC unit ...are you sure?

michelle7673

I like those Tide capsules. I grease 'em up good with virgin coconut oil from Shangri-La and they go down beautifully.
This has reduced my toxic sarcasm to (almost) zero.

why would you want to reduce sarcasm?

Busted. I don't, and it ain't working. Plus those raspberry ketones are NOT getting my laundry clean.

Candi_land

I do the chocolate cleanse pretty much daily. It rids me of . . . chocolate cravings. :bigsmile:

^^ This. I also drink diet soda daily, and give myself enema's with my leftover coffee. It helped me lose 100lbs in 7 days!

ILiftHeavyAcrylics

I do the chocolate cleanse pretty much daily. It rids me of . . . chocolate cravings. :bigsmile:

chocolate cleanse..does that involve a lot exlax and toilet time?

It usually involves york peppermint patties and/or talenti double dark chocolate gelato.

usmcmp

I did the husband cleanse once. Lost 170 pounds of fat and bullsh*t. It was really easy. You just take some paperwork, signatures and a judge. BOOM! *kitten*-be-gone!

ndj1979

I do the chocolate cleanse pretty much daily. It rids me of . . . chocolate cravings. :bigsmile:

^^ This. I also drink diet soda daily, and give myself enema's with my leftover coffee. It helped me lose 100lbs in 7 days!

interesting..do diet coke + chocolate = weight loss???? That might be new theory or relativity...

meeper123

just cut out the stuff that is filled with chemicals and eat good veggies and lean proteins you'll do fine and it can be forever not a fad

ndj1979

I did the husband cleanse once. Lost 170 pounds of fat and bullsh*t. It was really easy. You just take some paperwork, signatures and a judge. BOOM! *kitten*-be-gone!

I heard that is expensive...

Jovette42

I've used the Ultimate Reset and it was good. No I am not a vegan but I like the foods www.myultimatereset.com/Jovette42 You can do it up to 4x a year but right now 1x works fine for me. I plan on doing it in Sep/Oct.

ndj1979

I do the chocolate cleanse pretty much daily. It rids me of . . . chocolate cravings. :bigsmile:

chocolate cleanse..does that involve a lot exlax and toilet time?

It usually involves york peppermint patties and/or talenti double dark chocolate gelato.

mmmm talenti gelato ...

OK now back to regular programming..

come on people I want to hear from the real cleansers!!!! waaaaaa waaaa waaa LOL

usmcmp

I did the husband cleanse once. Lost 170 pounds of fat and bullsh*t. It was really easy. You just take some paperwork, signatures and a judge. BOOM! *kitten*-be-gone!

I heard that is expensive...

I heard it can be, but in my case it was a couple hundred bucks and worked quick!

ggxx100

I take a toilet scrubber and scrub my insides. It's hard to get to my intestines, but it takes all the bacteria away and leaves me squeaky clean. I then follow with 10 days of the Master Cleanse. Nothing but lemon juice and maple syrup will work wonders for you.

michelle7673

I did the husband cleanse once. Lost 170 pounds of fat and bullsh*t. It was really easy. You just take some paperwork, signatures and a judge. BOOM! *kitten*-be-gone!

I heard that is expensive...

Well....speaking from experience....not as expensive as having the husband to begin with.

ndj1979

I did the husband cleanse once. Lost 170 pounds of fat and bullsh*t. It was really easy. You just take some paperwork, signatures and a judge. BOOM! *kitten*-be-gone!

I heard that is expensive...

Well....speaking from experience....not as expensive as having the husband to begin with.

bahahahahahaha I like your style...

AllonsYtotheTardis