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How do you feel about advice regarding your diet?

tamtamzztamtamzz Posts: 142Member Posts: 142Member
I'm talking about unsolicited advice.

Like, if a friend were to close out their diary for the day would you comment, you need to eat more/less, or you need to drink more water, or lay off the sodium etc. whether they asked you or not, or would you simply not comment, or support them in logging every day and making an effort even if you didn't agree with what was going on in their diary?

I do not give advice unless I'm specifically asked. I generally comment on exercise completed more than completed diaries. I don't want it be like, I'll give you a good comment when you are good, and no comment when you are bad when it comes to the diary. I don't think that's fair.

What do you do, and how do you feel about unsolicited advice?
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Replies

  • suziecue66suziecue66 Posts: 1,326Member Member Posts: 1,326Member Member
    I wouldn't give unsolicited advice. They may not be eating what I consider healthy but thats just my opinion and if they are happy and seeing results that's all that matters. Its not up to someone else to decide whether others have had a good or bad day. The best dietary lifestyle is the one that you can maintain for life without gaining weight.
  • marcenepeamarcenepea Posts: 366Member Member Posts: 366Member Member
    I don't usually say anything unless its really scary. Like really really low calories or something. I wouldn't want to offend anyone and some people get offended easily.
    The way I look at it is I opened my diary to the public so people could help me. I am always open for good ideas. And what I think is ok sometimes can be alot better with small changes. I want to learn as much as possible and I am the first to admit my diet needs alot of help. lol
  • fatbitch321fatbitch321 Posts: 1Member Posts: 1Member
    don't give it...don't want it.
    :drinker:
  • lmelangleylmelangley Posts: 1,041Member Member Posts: 1,041Member Member
    I only make comments if I see unhealthy trends like eating too little over a couple of weeks in a row, or if I notice someone's diet is "off" enough that they might not be feeling well that day. But, I always try to be positive and non-critical of food choices. After all, we all need to figure out meal plans that work for us, and we're all different.
  • raeleekraeleek Posts: 414Member Member Posts: 414Member Member
    I only offer when asked specifically. Everyone has their own way of doing things.
  • dixiewhiskeydixiewhiskey Posts: 3,454Member Member Posts: 3,454Member Member
    I am open to everything.. but I would only give advice if someone was doing something very dangerous to health and wellbeing or if I were asked
  • pleytempleytem Posts: 79Member Posts: 79Member
    I normally don't but I have made a couple of unsolicited comments.I look at my pals as part of my journey. I have an open diary for them to see. If I keep logging crap foods I would hope someone would say good job logging maybe try to add more protein or fuel foods so you don't have to work so hard or?? rather than great job today when I ate nothing but junk food.I always try to be positive and give positive feedback I am also non-judgmental of peoples food choices. It's just an honest way to support my pals as I have the pals for a reason their support and I am their pals for the same reason I hope to support them through their journeys. I hope that made sense...:smile:
  • ITS_MY_CHOICEITS_MY_CHOICE Posts: 62Member Member Posts: 62Member Member
    I didn't even know you could comment on diaries! still learning.
  • tamtamzztamtamzz Posts: 142Member Posts: 142Member
    Yes! You absolutely can comment on a person's diary. You can do it in your news feed.

    I hear you guys on the dangerous part, but do you think dangerous is subjective?

    For example, one may view my diet as "dangerous" because I have gallstones. There are some days where I'm okay, and some days when I'm not. I must admit, I would be a little frustrated if someone were to tell me to eat more fat or to eat more period. A typical diet would have me rolling around on the floor in pain at best, and in the hospital at worst.

    There are many scenarios that I have been through myself that I couldn't possibly comment on one's diary, giving my unsolicited opinion because I don't know what they are going through.
  • tas3980tas3980 Posts: 100Member Posts: 100Member
    I wouldn't give unsolicited advice. They may not be eating what I consider healthy but thats just my opinion and if they are happy and seeing results that's all that matters. Its not up to someone else to decide whether others have had a good or bad day. The best dietary lifestyle is the one that you can maintain for life without gaining weight.

    ^^ this; well said! :)
  • Bonny619Bonny619 Posts: 311Member Member Posts: 311Member Member
    I HATE it. But only because I have already lost a significant amount of weight so when random people start telling me what I need to eat or not eat in order to lose the last 20-30, well it completely irks me.
  • cheerforsteelerscheerforsteelers Posts: 698Member Member Posts: 698Member Member
    I like the advice here and there, but I feel I don't get any. Sometimes I ask for it even. I know different things work for different people so just because I eat a certain way doesn't mean it works for someone else. I try to give a little bit of advice if someone asks for others to look over their food log. I don't know everything so I won't comment like I do.
  • jacqui1612jacqui1612 Posts: 128Member Member Posts: 128Member Member
    I like constructive criticism, both people giving it to me, and giving to others. If don't like to comment on peoples completed diaries if they are not open. Who knows what they are actually eating. I also don't comment much on others diaries. I'll have a quick look and if it looks like they have made good choices for the day, I will say well done.
    But as someone else said.. Every person has their own way of doing things. As long as it works for them, and it is nothing dangerous then I let them be...
  • VogtAndreaVogtAndrea Posts: 236Member Posts: 236Member
    I don't know about you but I get a pile of advice regarding my diet.
    Most of the people that know me know that I see a bariatric specialist, a dietician, a diabetes nurse, my own doctor every 3 weeks because I promised the bariatric specialist that I would and one of my 2 best friends in the whole world is a clinical dietician who is trying to keep mum most of the time. I work with the other dietician and diabetes nurse. My family is my cheering section and they're wonderful. All of my family fights with their weight so we all encourage each other.
    There are times that they'll ask pointed questions and I keep it real and honest and up front.
    My friends are welcome to add a little unsolicited advice too but they're not allowed to get ugly with it on me. If they are, I do shut them down nicely with "I appreciate that you're trying to help and I'll certainly give it a try after I check its numbers".
    If they're commenting about me having slipped and having a very bad day, the answer's always: " Yes, I did but tomorrow I'll do much better." If they persist, I'll thank them for caring and let them know that I do have it under control.
  • jawhebjawheb Posts: 304Member Posts: 304Member
    Thanks for posting this! I do try to help and
    encourage my MFP friends. It's good to know
    that maybe I should just back off if they are set
    on eating the calories they choose to meet everyday.
    I don't want someone to think I'm being critical. I just
    really want to be supportive for them. I thought that's
    why we have friends and open diaries. I figure
    if their diaries are open they are open for suggestions.
  • jeatheyjeathey Posts: 358Member Member Posts: 358Member Member
    On MFP its different.

    But i have had people who find out how much weight I have lost and then they attempt to give me advice on how I could have lost it faster or whatever.. I dont care what you think obviously its working and has worked for me.
  • caraiselitecaraiselite Posts: 2,631Member Member Posts: 2,631Member Member
    if they know about low carb/keto, i'll listen.
    if they try getting me to count calories instead or *gasp* eat bread and pasta, no ty.

    counting calories is for squares.
  • ChapinaGrandeChapinaGrande Posts: 296Member Member Posts: 296Member Member
    I feel differently. I have my diary open because I see it as an implied "Give Me Diet Advice" request. I've been getting frustrated because people keep saying "good job" but not actually giving me advice when I clearly (OK, not clearly) asked for it by opening my diary. On that note, one time I said to someone, after asking if he would accept input and he said yes, "Have you considered adding more fruits and vegetables? That might help lower your sodium count." Maybe I broke an unspoken MFP rule and am a gigantic a-hole. :(
  • NoAdditivesNoAdditives Posts: 4,315Member Member Posts: 4,315Member Member
    I used to give unsolicited advice after I'd seen a person's trends. If they were consistently under cals, over on sodium and eating too much processed food, not drinking enough water, etc., I'd mention it in a friendly way. I'm here to help my friends. I don't want to blindly or quietly encourage habits I know to be bad for health.

    ETA: I haven't been keeping up on my friend's diaries like I used to because I just don't have the time at the moment.
  • ctwm84ctwm84 Posts: 31Member Member Posts: 31Member Member
    I really dont care about what people have to say to me. I know exactly what I am putting into my body and I know what is working. I does irritate me when people complain about not losing weight when their diaries are full of changs mongolian grill and mcdonalds and stuff, but I still dont say anything. Its not my business.

    I have a coworker who constantly complains about her weight. I set her up on MFP, offer to give her my recipies, and yesterday she sent me a pic mail on my phone of a cream filled donut claiming it was her "diet food"... I kinda wanna punch her in the face. Either do something about it or stop complaining to me. know what I mean?
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