Dilemma! Awkward unfriending with mutual friends

sthrnchick
sthrnchick Posts: 771
in Chit-Chat
I need some help. I have one friend on this site that is CONSTANTLY being negative and hitting me with low blows( and the reason why, still stumps me!). I have NO problem unfriending anyone that is one my FL normally( I do so weekly)....but this friend is friends with nearly everyone of my friends...have any of you dealt with this...how did you handle? I hate to get into some awkward situation...but then again...I can't keep them around...bringing me down everyday!
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Replies

  • HellsKells
    HellsKells Posts: 671 Member
    If your other "friends" are going to give you a hard time about ditching someone that's being negative toward you, do you really wanna be friends with those people?

    I wouldn't.
  • sunnybug90
    sunnybug90 Posts: 58
    Just unfriend them and ignore them. I'm friends with people who are friends with other people I wouldn't mind seeing dive off a cliff and its not awkward if you don't let it get that way.
  • rjt1000
    rjt1000 Posts: 700 Member
    dump him. And if somebody makes a negative comment about it, dump them as well. What's the point of "friends" if they give you unnecessary grief?
  • runmybunsoff
    runmybunsoff Posts: 224 Member
    :drinker:
  • SueGremlin
    SueGremlin Posts: 1,066 Member
    can't everyone in question just read this thread?
  • monicalosesweight
    monicalosesweight Posts: 1,173 Member
    I would just tell him that he needs to be nicer or you'll ban him. It doesn't matter if he's friends with them. He still has to respect you. If he really is being mean - make a point of contacting him through a message and explain very nicely what you need to see him change. Explain he's hurting your feelings and you'd rather get positive messages as he's not helping you on your quest for a better you. Anyone who gets upset with this, probably wasn't your friend to start with.
  • laprovocateur
    laprovocateur Posts: 129 Member
    just do it. if they ask, tell them why. if anyone else asks, they're paying way too much attention to the lives of others on the interwebs.
  • lluulluu
    lluulluu Posts: 115 Member
    Hi - Can you not send them a private email telling them how your feel. Maybe they are unaware of what they are doing... If not time to unfriend.
  • CrystalDreams
    CrystalDreams Posts: 418 Member
    to be honest, you have to do whats best for you. personally i would message them why and de-friend them. but thats just me.
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
    I delete...then when their buddy PM me.
    Telling what i should do i deleted them.
    This is your page f uck all this popularity contest and high school bu llsh it.:angry:
  • Jules2Be
    Jules2Be Posts: 2,238 Member
    you have to do whats best for you.
    maybe it WILL be awkward, but you'll probably feel some relief once the person isnt on your page.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    Pretty sure many of your friends are going to want to delete *you* after they see that you ask what to do about them on the public forums...
  • epmck11
    epmck11 Posts: 159 Member
    Who cares? It's not like it's a real life person you need to see out in social situations. I love this site, but some of you people take these MFP friends way too serious if it's seriously causing a stressed out dilemma in your life when you don't know whether or not to unfriend someone who clearly angers you but you've never met because you share mutual friends with another person you've never met. Just remove them, it's over, move on with your life, find something else to worry about.
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    ignore/block works wonders.
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    tbh i doubt anyone will notice.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    Just do it. It's not likely anyone will even notice. If they do, they probably won't care. If they do, then you don't need the drama -- unfriend them, too. You can add me to make up the difference. :)
    This site is about getting healthy. It's great when we can support each other along the way, but if your friends are making it worse, it's time to cut them loose.
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    can't everyone in question just read this thread?
    That's what I was thinking.
  • slimmergalpal
    slimmergalpal Posts: 235 Member
    Hit the Hide button. It works wonders !!! solved bunches of problems for me in the same situation. Good luck !
  • reese66
    reese66 Posts: 2,920 Member
    Delete them if they are negative and not your cup of tea.
  • SusanDDuncan1
    SusanDDuncan1 Posts: 13
    Listen to Monica!!
  • sthrnchick
    sthrnchick Posts: 771
    can't everyone in question just read this thread?

    YES!!! They can....
  • WickedBean
    WickedBean Posts: 244 Member
    delete and move on... seriously majority of people will not make a big deal and if the do... delete them too..

    although if you were on my friends list I would delete you for posting this, because I would hate to think I was the friend you were asking about on a public forum.
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
    I've deleted people with a ton of mutual friends. Not for the same reason as you, but still. It isn't awkward at all when we comment on mutual friends statuses. I don't care. But I'm also.pretty sure they didn't notice or care I deleted them, considering they were deleted because they never talked to me.
  • saragato
    saragato Posts: 1,154
    Pretty sure many of your friends are going to want to delete *you* after they see that you ask what to do about them on the public forums...

    Because they're talking about one person who's an *kitten* and just happen to mention they're mutual friends with just about everyone else? Sheesh if people are that sensitive, sign me up to live on the moon.

    OP: Nothing original to be said. Defriend then block them. What your mutual friends think is null and void. Bottom line is you don't need that person's crap especially if they're targeting you personally and there's no excuses to keep trash like that around.
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
    Is this a person you see on a regular/semi-regular basis?

    If it's a person you see on a regular basis, just go out of your way to not sit/stand near them. Excuse yourself or try and converse with someone else.

    My husband doesn't like a particular person in our group, so I usually sit in as a buffer. (I get along fine with the guy and know how to subtly steer the conversation on topics he's good at discuss (ie; no politics, religion or OS)

    If they make nasty comments on your fb page, make make it so they don't see your feed. It's only a few simple steps.

    You don't have to be chummy, but you don't have to say "I don't like you anymore, we're not friends" In this situation, a passive-aggressive manner is probably your best route.
  • littlecaponey2
    littlecaponey2 Posts: 143 Member
    Hit the Hide button. It works wonders !!! solved bunches of problems for me in the same situation. Good luck !

    If you hit the "hide" button it only keeps you from seeing what they have posted on their "wall" and not the other way around. And SC is an avid poster so if the person can no longer see her posts.....the jig is up. =).

    I'm just hoping I am not the person.....ha ha ha! Because you know I will question you as to where I our friendship went....just like I did before.....ha ha ha!
  • lisalove37
    lisalove37 Posts: 7
    It's okay to let go. Love yourself enough to give yourself permission to let go of someone who isn't lifting you up. The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others on how you demand to be treated. Don't settle for anything other than respect.
    God knows who belongs in you life. Trust and let go. Whoever is meant to be there, will still be there. I hope this helps. Fill yourself with joy and laughter :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • sthrnchick
    sthrnchick Posts: 771
    Pretty sure many of your friends are going to want to delete *you* after they see that you ask what to do about them on the public forums...
    Maybe... but if they delete me...then its all good! Have to do what we need to do!!!
  • NostalgicMuse
    NostalgicMuse Posts: 340 Member
    click it and forget it.
  • sthrnchick
    sthrnchick Posts: 771
    Hit the Hide button. It works wonders !!! solved bunches of problems for me in the same situation. Good luck !

    If you hit the "hide" button it only keeps you from seeing what they have posted on their "wall" and not the other way around. And SC is an avid poster so if the person can no longer see her posts.....the jig is up. =).

    I'm just hoping I am not the person.....ha ha ha! Because you know I will question you as to where I our friendship went....just like I did before.....ha ha ha!

    Girl...really? You are one of my FAVS!!! Never!

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