I'm so FLIPPIN' tired of this!!!

While I completely get where you are coming from cuz i feel the same way at times here's the advice i give myself
You are going way too hard.
If you want that lil bite sized snicker GET IT. it's better than the alternative of a whole bar. And yes so what you're going to cross fit later. If you're doing it right you'll burn that snicker off in no time and you didn't deprive yourself.
Deprivation will undo all your hard work. Remember that.

As for your comfort food. go out and buy or repurpose a bowl or small plate just for the use with your comfort food. if you want mac and cheese with dinner. add veggies to it or not but use the small serving plate and continue on your journey.
Life is for living and you have to find balance between healthy and deprivation. NO one should live a life w/o comfort food or wine.

Check out the "Eat More to Weigh Less" group--

Most there are eating 1900-2100 calories a day and that's CUTTING for weight loss. Maintenance is 2300-2500 a day maybe more--depending on the person. Honey, there's Nothing wrong with a bite size of chocolate or a glass of wine. Don't beat yourself up over it. :-(

Life is for living and you have to find balance between healthy and deprivation. NO one should live a life w/o comfort food or wine.

^^ This. I lost 70lbs a few years ago by over-training 2-3 hrs sometimes more a day and being extremely strict on diet and life happened and ended up gaining back at least half of that. This time around I'm going with the above advice and trying to do this in a way that doesn't involve cutting out everything. I know it works for some people. But it's not realistic for myself. My $0.02

While I completely get where you are coming from cuz i feel the same way at times here's the advice i give myself
You are going way too hard.
If you want that lil bite sized snicker GET IT. it's better than the alternative of a whole bar. And yes so what you're going to cross fit later. If you're doing it right you'll burn that snicker off in no time and you didn't deprive yourself.
Deprivation will undo all your hard work. Remember that.

As for your comfort food. go out and buy or repurpose a bowl or small plate just for the use with your comfort food. if you want mac and cheese with dinner. add veggies to it or not but use the small serving plate and continue on your journey.
Life is for living and you have to find balance between healthy and deprivation. NO one should live a life w/o comfort food or wine.

100% agree! Portion control is key. Just don't over indulge, and don't be too hard on yourself.

Saying "Oh I've already ruined my good eating for the day, I'll just eat like crap", is like saying "oh I dropped my cellphone on the ground, I'll just smash it until it breaks".

I wouldn't let it bother you. Just fit it in your calories for the day. I go over sometimes and I'm still losing weight! You will do this!

Been there, too! I allow myself everything I want - I just don't do it very often. At least once per week, I have something I want, whether it's in my "diet" plan or not. I just count it in my calories for the day. For example, my favorite thing is a Vanilla Malt - but I limit myself to one per month. If not, I'd be eating them every day!! I was really concerned about eating at Genghis Grill yesterday because I didn't know how to count the calories. But, I ate half the bowl and saved the other half for dinner. When I got home, I looked at the calories, and ended up being below calories for the day. If I want potatoes, I eat potatoes. But I don't eat bread, potatoes, mac and cheese, pasta, etc. in the same meal or even in the same day. There is no reason you shouldn't be able to have a glass of wine every day if you count it in your calories. You might have to choose between that an ice cream on a certain day - but you should be able to have one of them I try to leave enough calories for some Purity Heavenly Hash frozen yogurt every day so that I don't feel deprived. I only get 1420 calories per day, so I have to really plan. But I don't let myself feel deprived. Most of the "healthy foods" are foods I love, anyway. I'm not picky - I could eat anything! I look at it like this. How much food do I get to eat today, and how can I plan for my favorite things in that amount of calories. I'm not saying I never go over - but I don't beat myself up over it. I just start new tomorrow. With your workouts, you should be able to get extra calories in. What I like about MFP is that once you enter the foods into your plan, all you have to do is check them off as you eat them. There's not that much counting once you get a few foods in there. I think that people give up because they feel deprived, but you should not ever feel deprived if you plan for what you want to eat. I end up eating lots of veggies so that I can have my frozen yogurt every day! Eating out is my worst problem. The serving sizes are so huge, and I'm a clean plater!!! Good luck. Don't get discouraged. Just plan for that wine - and work off that small snickers.

It's all about letting yourself indulge . . . but learning to substitute new indulgences for the old ones. For instance, I used to LOVE Snickers. The fun size ones are the bomb. But I would pop the whole thing in my mouth, taste it, swallow it, and it's done. And then, of course, I'm craving more. That's not just because the caramel is so perfect, the nuts are so salty, or the chocolate is so chocolatey. Those things are full of preservatives, food coloring, etc. And eating those things can make you crave more junk.

Now, if you're going to indulge (which I recommend from time to time!), pick something that you're eating simply because of its real ingredients, not because of all the additives, which may really be what your body is craving. If you can stay away from super-processed foods for one week, you really do crave them less. I promise. I sometimes it even makes me sick when I start eating them again, because my body isn't used to all those toxins.

Instead of a fun-size Snickers bar, now I would probably have some Ghirardelli Sea Salt Soiree dark chocolate. It's a 100g bar, but I only eat a little square or less each time I eat some it (and a serving is three squares). The chocolate taste is so intense that I don't need more than that. And one square of this is way better for you than one fun-size Snickers. And since it's dark chocolate, there are some benefits, like anti-oxidants and increase of dopamine in the brain! It has some almond pieces in it instead of the peanuts in a Snickers, and some added sea salt that somehow gives the chocolate a fruity taste.

So, what I'm saying is, don't get mad at yourself for indulging every now and then. Have a much smaller glass of wine-- just enough for a taste, and sip it slowly with a piece of dark chocolate. It will feel so decadent and yet you'll be saving calories if you cut out Snickers bars and things. Plus, your body will like you much better for not stuffing it with toxins. You'll have more energy, and maybe you won't feel so jaded about your new lifestyle. You can't limit yourself from EVERYTHING you love. Just try to love new things!

You are being WAY too hard on yourself, sweetie! One thing that helps me is instead of saying "I have to...", I say, "I get to..." So instead of "I have to work out today", I say "I get to take care of myself today by working out". Or "I get to eat this delicious healthy meal today!" Eating chocolate isn't bad at all....if you know when to stop. A bite size Snickers shouldn't undo your whole day. I read a book called "Coach Yourself Thin" by Greg Hottinger. He talks about the ALL OR NOTHING attitude. I was the same way and this book helped a lot!!

Keep your head up, and don't give up! :flowerforyou:

I think there is a middle ground that is hard to find and maintain.

On one hand, if you're constantly eating comfort foods, sweets and wine (I struggle with sweets myself), you ARE erasing some of the progress and work that you're doing at the gym. I'm all about moderation, but it does come down to calories in/calories out, and if someone is drinking 2 glasses of wine a night, they are essentially erasing their gym workout, or eradicating their calorie deficit. There is also the issue that sweets, refined carbs and alcohol are empty calories, and your body needs as much nutrition as possible when you are at a calorie deficit.

On the other hand, if you're too strict with yourself, you are going to be miserable every day and feel deprived. Eventually that alone will make you binge or quit.

For me, what works is setting some rules for "treating" myself. If I'm under my calorie limit for the day, I allow myself to have a serving of Dove dark chocolate. But, the treat has to come at the end of the day and is only allowed if I've done what I needed to do. If I've had a different sweet during the evening, I don't do the Dove chocolate. I also allow myself one "treat" meal and sweet treat on the weekends, and generally up my calories on the weekend as well. I

This plan has helped me to maintain an acceptable weight for a few months. I'd really like to lose 5 more pounds, so I'm going to cut the sweets out and keep everything else the same for a month and see how it goes. I'm very close to my goal, so my motivation is not as strong as it was when I was starting out. It is very easy for calories and unhealthy food to "creep" back in to my daily eating a little at a time, and as a compulsive eater, I really have to remain vigilant about it.

Maybe you need to factor a few sweets into your plan. You also could work on getting rid of the "all or nothing" thinking. No one is perfect at all times, so it is important to have a "good enough" standard instead of a "perfect" standard. Many people who are disordered eaters (either compulsively undereaters or compulsively overeaters) suffer from a perfectionist mindset and aren't able to find moderation. That is something that I work on all the time. In the end, all you can do is plan, try to stick to your plan, make adjustments and forgive yourself if you aren't perfect. It's a process and not an event.

I think there is a middle ground that is hard to find and maintain.

On one hand, if you're constantly eating comfort foods, sweets and wine (I struggle with sweets myself), you ARE erasing some of the progress and work that you're doing at the gym. I'm all about moderation, but it does come down to calories in/calories out, and if someone is drinking 2 glasses of wine a night, they are essentially erasing their gym workout, or eradicating their calorie deficit. There is also the issue that sweets, refined carbs and alcohol are empty calories, and your body needs as much nutrition as possible when you are at a calorie deficit.

On the other hand, if you're too strict with yourself, you are going to be miserable every day and feel deprived. Eventually that alone will make you binge or quit.

For me, what works is setting some rules for "treating" myself. If I'm under my calorie limit for the day, I allow myself to have a serving of Dove dark chocolate. But, the treat has to come at the end of the day and is only allowed if I've done what I needed to do. If I've had a different sweet during the evening, I don't do the Dove chocolate. I also allow myself one "treat" meal and sweet treat on the weekends, and generally up my calories on the weekend as well. I

This plan has helped me to maintain an acceptable weight for a few months. I'd really like to lose 5 more pounds, so I'm going to cut the sweets out and keep everything else the same for a month and see how it goes. I'm very close to my goal, so my motivation is not as strong as it was when I was starting out. It is very easy for calories and unhealthy food to "creep" back in to my daily eating a little at a time, and as a compulsive eater, I really have to remain vigilant about it.

Maybe you need to factor a few sweets into your plan. You also could work on getting rid of the "all or nothing" thinking. No one is perfect at all times, so it is important to have a "good enough" standard instead of a "perfect" standard. Many people who are disordered eaters (either compulsively undereaters or compulsively overeaters) suffer from a perfectionist mindset and aren't able to find moderation. That is something that I work on all the time. In the end, all you can do is plan, try to stick to your plan, make adjustments and forgive yourself if you aren't perfect. It's a process and not an event.

Well said!

A little red wine is actually good for u or so the studies say :-) Its the anti-oxidants and other natural chemicals from the processed red grape skin.

Alcohol is empty calories but u have a handle on your exercise and same with the alcohol slowing down ur metabolism - exercise will counter-balance that.

Everything in moderation.

Same thing for chocolate - dark has more nutrients but a treat once in a while is fine!

You actually sound like u are on track - so congrats! And allow yourself some good things - otherwise you'll reach your goal weight and never eat chocolate/drink wine again? Didn't think so Better to work them in now to your routine!

I don't understand why you feel you need so many rules. Fit your wine and snickers bar in every day. I would go nuts if I tried to eat by some of the "rules" these people have.

This.

Are you NEVER going to have wine, cheese, or any of those foods again? No? So, why are you cutting them out now instead of trying to figure out how to have them within a healthy lifestyle?

NOW WHAT MAKES YOU THINK U R FAILING???? I'VE DONE THIS SO MANY TIMES BUT I JUST KEEP IT MOVING. THE DEVIL DOESN'T WANT US TO SUCCEED, HE WANTS US TO LOOK AT OUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS AND STILL MAKE US BELIEVE WE STILL AREN'T DOING THIS RIGHT. I GOT YOUR BACK, BLOCK OUT ALL THOSE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS, WHICH MAY INCLUDE CERTAIN PPL AROUND YOU CAUSE THEY ARE JEALOUS OF YOU !!!!! YES I SAID IT:0) CONTINUE TO REACH FOR THE PRIZE, YOU ARE ALMOST THERE. LIKE OUR BIBLES SAY.... FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT & DON'T LOOK BACK. IF I DON'T HAVE YOU AS A FRIEND, I DO NOW AND CONTACT ME ANYTIME.


slimSCONIE

I regularly incorporate small amounts of wine, microbrew beer, full fat cheese, and organic dark chocolate into my eating. I get good quality stuff. I don't believe in putting any "real" food off limits (donuts and Little Debbie snack cakes, on the other hand... )

When you know you're going to have it and it's not a big deal and it fits into your calories, it's good for your psychological well being. It prevents you from going nuts and bingeing.

P.S. EAT THAT LITTLE PIECE OF JUNK FOOD.... THEN BE DONE WITH IT. I MIGHT HAVE A MILKY WAY TODAY MYSELF

slimSCONIE