Husband wants me to wear sexier clothes but I just can't

I second that, "if you won't do it, someone else will."

a big t-shirt doesn't hide anything. if anything, they make people look bigger than they are and very shapeless. Wear something that flatters your figure and I'm sure you will feel 10x better. I don't think your husband is telling you to go out half naked. It seems like he just wants you to dress in clothes that accentuate your figure. There are clothes for every body type, same with lingerie

*edited for spelling error

First he should support you and understand and if he don't then it's on him. So not to man bash, I think you've got bigger problems. Why would he want you to get lingerie if he doesn't like big women? You should ask him that. And I agree with the other poster if you don't he may look for someone who will.

he WANTS to see you in it, which tells me it cant be all that bad...unless youre actually a cat (i tried to see other pics, but ur aact is private, lol) theres alot of teddies that look great of bigger girls and give some good coverage over the belly, but still make ur T &A look extra fantastic! he already must know ur uncomfortable with it, so hes not expecting you do do a strip tease or anything like that! just put it on and be bashful about it! thats sexy too! i found that the more i forced myself to do things like this, and wear sexier clothes, the more inclined i was to make change. its like fake it till u make it! and i works. think HOT!

Oh my gosh sounds like I could have written this. I wish you the best. You can do it. I get up every day an struggle with being a big girl. But, we are taking the steps to be healthy.. Skinny comes last. Sexy is only a feeling. And any size can be sexy..

If you husband can't accept and love you the way you are then he doesn't deseve you at all. Wear what you're comfortable wearing and don't change yourself for the amusment of someone else.

He should never make you feel like you have to do something you're not comfortable doing.

The key to almost every relationship issue is communication.

Let him know exactly how you feel. Let him know that you're working hard at being healthier, and that when you're comfortable you'll think about dressing up for him, on occasion.

If you do this and he still pressures you, you may have a problem. If he wants to change how you dress/look overall, you may have a problem.

It has nothing to do with being comfortable with yourself. If your husband or whatever he is loves u he will never make you feel uncomfortable. He would never sit there and tell you all the things hes telling you and you being a woman shouldn't put up with it.

my boyfriend looks at me me the same way in sexy clothing as he does when im in sweats, no make up, and pimples. this has continued even after 4 years together and two in the same house. he is the reason i have come to accept and love my body just how it is. i was a weak individual before. conforming to peer presure and the idea of the ideal body instilled on us throught the media. bassically i had bulimia and obsesivly exercised myself into a hospital for half a year. now im proud enough of it to strut around naked.no matter what i say, you will not understand how much this means to me. to be able to accept me and love me. i never thought i would be here in my life, and im happy to have someone who supports me and loves me for my inside not my outside. do you know what it feels like to look like crap, then see someone gazing at you with 'sexy eyes' anyways? like you're the only person in the world that matters. and that's how it should be. im not a 50 house wife. im not waiting at the door in a pretty skirt with a cocktail. im getting help making dinner and doing chores, i'm 100% respectful and open to his feelings as he is to mine, and if anyone commanded me to do anything- id be outa there in a second because i respect myself.

if your hubs cant respect you for who you are and is trying to change you, you may want to decided whats more important to YOU. once again, this journey is about you.

Having respect for yourself is a whole package of mind/body or mental/physical or thoughts/actions or words/deeds and hard to measure or separate.

If you believe in concepts such as honor, integrity, and justice then carry those concepts into your everyday life you will have respect for yourself as well as others.

"Without self-respect there can be no genuine success. Success won at the cost of self-respect is not success ? for what shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his own self-respect." - B. C. Forbes

try a sexy silk short nightshirt in a pretty print or red. It could be a compromise that works for you both

Do whatever makes you comfortable.
If he doesn't like it, too damn bad and that's the way I look at it.
If he's going to be this upset over something as simple as not wanting to wear some sexy lingerie because you just don't feel sexy, there could be a problem. Tell him to take a hike.
However, do keep in mind, that in order for him to do things for you, you have to do things for him.
How about trying to meet in the middle?
He wants sexy lingerie, fine. Tell him you want to lose ten pounds or so, and then you'll do it, but until then you'll find something else he'll enjoy equally so.

SOOOOOOO TRUE!! I didn't feel sexy so didn't wear sexy things day or night. I covered up in tunic style tops, over sized shirts and tshirts to bed etc. Sure I'll would wear something sexy but only with the lights off. As I lost the weight I felt more comfortable and wore nicer more revealing things. I"m still not to my goal weight but I'm in a size 10 now and loving how I look and so is my husband. Now I want to wear sexy things and even undress in front of him, walk around naked and don't make him close his eyes anymore when I'm getting changed. Oh yeah I used to tell him to close his eyes or put the pillow over his face so he couldn't see me naked. I didn't even want to see myself let alone have him see me! Now I strut around like no ones business.

Tell your DH what goes around comes around. If he wants to see you in sexy clothes then he can help you feel better about how you look and feel and then you'll gladly strut around for him in something sexy. In the mean time shop in a big girl store like lane bryant and get some nice nighties there. They are sexy without being too revealing. Sometimes its all about getting a good fit that makes the difference.

I have sooooo been in your position. I had weight loss surgery and lost over 100lbs. I still have 40 to go, but it took a very long time to feel sexy. The man I was with commented about my weight a lot, and it did nothing but make me feel terrible and eat more. Knowing you are being judged does not make you want to dress in lingerie. My advice for you is to dress up more in your clothing, hair and makeup. this will inspire you to keep working at your goal. Add me as a friend, I think we could relate on some things.