Your funniest quote.
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Why fart and waste it when you can burp and taste it...0
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I dont skinny dip, i chunky dunk!0
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saw this online and thought it was pretty funny
"If gas prices keep going up, I'm going to cut holes in the floor of my car and Flinstone that b****!"0 -
People say that drinking coffee every day is dangerous. But I say the bigger risk to your health is standing between me and my sweet cup of caffeinated joy! :devil:0
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A couple of my favorites are:
I was busier than a one legged man in an *kitten* kicking contest!
Hotter than a ten cent hooker on dime night!0 -
God made mud, God made dirt, God made boys so girls can flirt.
Dear Guys Wearing Skinny Jeans, I...Can't...Breathe! Sincerely, Your B*lls....lmfao!!
You've never realized how weird your friends are until you have to describe them to someone else.
Sometimes I'm being annoying to you because I like you.
Shh.... Be pretty.0 -
God made mud, God made dirt, God made boys so girls can flirt.
Dear Guys Wearing Skinny Jeans, I...Can't...Breathe! Sincerely, Your B*lls....lmfao!!
You've never realized how weird your friends are until you have to describe them to someone else.
Sometimes I'm being annoying to you because I like you.
Shh.... Be pretty.
These are sooooo funny!!0 -
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts.Others come into our lives & make us want to leave footprints on their face. :devil:0
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Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.0
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Calories.....those are the little buggers that sneak into my closet at night and sew my clothes tighter.0
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Hold on....nobody move.....I lost my mind! If you find it please don't straighten it out....it has taken me years to get it that twisted!0
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If you won't stand behind our troops, feel free to stand in front of them!0
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they say women love a man in uniform....but when i go to the club in my mcdonald's uniform no one even looks at me!0
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that awkward moment when you go to hug someone sexy as hell and you hit the mirror0
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You are as worthless as tits on a bull0
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Silence is golden, duct tape is silver : )0
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i see says the blind man talking to the deaf man on the phone.0
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May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who
screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.0 -
I've upped my fiber intake. Up yours!
Some people are like Slinkies.They aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to my face when I push them down a flight of stairs.0 -
Don't sweat the petty things, and definitely never pet the sweaty things.0
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