My crazy Ex.. Looking for drama anyone? lol

My first BF was similar -at the first sign of controlling and abuse i left.

Couple of months ago my brother was visiting, he got drunk and really aggressive (also recently broke up with his gf, my guess is he did to her what he tried to do to me - hit her because she dared to tell him to take off his tie, shoes not to be so loud, to go throw up in the bathroom, asked if he was ok...).
I called the cops on him, told my parents (he still lives at home, 24 yr old), told everyone in our family and to all our friends (i'm done playing my moms "let's hide this form the world, he's a good boy he doesn't mean it" game) which eventually got him to start going to therapy.
(Funny thing after I started to talk everyone else started to talk and we were baffled with what we found out.)

I am sick of them behaving like two year old and I have no sympathy or understanding for them. Whatever they do to themselves/happens to them they brought it on themselves.

Get a restraining order, cut him out of your life, your kids don't need that kind of father. Sometimes no father is a lot better than any father.

I've been there before. When I left my insane ex-boyfriend:
When I said, "I'm leaving, my grandma will be here to pick me up in a bit," My ex told me he was going to commit suicide and I had to wrestle a knife from him (dumb, dumb, dumb idea). I grabbed it, and locked myself in the bathroom (it had no windows) and had no way out. He started banging and punching the door like a madman, and when he said, "Your grandma is here." I thought he was lying. He wasn't, and he described her to me (he had never seen her before so this was the only way I knew it was true). I cautiously came out of the bathroom and was terrified that he might hurt her. But he went from an enraged madman to complete gentlemen in less than 30 seconds. He became suddenly polite and helped load my bags to leave.

THAT is a master manipulator, and I believe that is what you have on your hands. My ex was never physically violent until I told him we were through. Before I told him, "It's over." he was constantly putting me down, looking at other girls and saying things like "If I weren't with you, I'd hit that up." or he'd command me do do something and threaten to kick me out if I didn't do it, right then and there.

I don't know what your ex has been saying to you so your circumstances may not have started out so dire like mine did, but it looks like it's turning in that direction considering your ex's attempted suicide and willingness to hit his own family.

Keep yourself away from him. Keep your KIDS away from him. Don't EVER go over to see him alone. Have a witness to every in-person conversation so in case he makes any threats, you have someone to A. Protect you, and B. Confirm any threatening statements. This man has issues, don't give him an opportunity to hurt you or your children. If he hurt his own brother and sister, who knows who else he is willing to hurt?

Been there, done this, got hit by a car by my ex for walking away from him.
My advise, get out and get out now. Take the kids and call the police to file a report against him. The police report will be a big help to you later on when you go for custody. Also, sit down and write down everything he's done and when.
I know it's hard. I was with my ex for years and the abuse started before we moved in together. In one of his tirades, he hit me so bad that I lost his child that I was carrying. After that, he convinced me to move from PA to FL so we could have a 'fresh' start. 8 months after that I called my Mom in NJ and told her that I was almost in Georgia and on my way home. I left a note in the kitchen for him for him to see when he got back from work.
It's going to be a long, hard road, but for your safety and the safety of your children, you have to find the courage to do it.
And no going back to him after he's 'reformed.' Me leaving my ex was his wake up call. He got help and now he's a completely changed man. He's gotten married and has a little girl. We talk occasionally now, and that only started because his wife told him that he had to atone or she was gone. She made him grow up and apologize.

Restraining order, divorce lawyer. Cease all direct contact with him, do not even contact him to tell him you are seeking a divorce lawyer and police: only contact him through lawyers/police, from here out. I would call the police (non-emergency) immediately and explain the situation, that he is violent and suicidal, and that you're afraid of what he's going to do to yourself or others. Contact your local women's centre for similar advice on how to proceed, to keep yourself safe. Change your locks, get deadbolts and chains on every door, get a security system if you can afford it, and if you have any physically capable male friends or family that can come stay with you, or that you can stay with, until you can get further advice/protection from police, PLEASE do so. He HAS laid a hand on you, and physically restraining you is a form of violence/assault. Document these incidents, as you can probably build a case to press charges. If your brother and sister in-law love you and the kids, I would talk to them about pressing charges against their brother. It's a tough thing to do to their sibling, I'm sure, but it's for everyone's own good... and what he did to his brother's ankle surely involved medical documentation, and the siblings are each other's perfect witness. The police will no doubt take it seriously if this guy's own siblings are will to have him charged for assault.

It's in everyone's best interest, including your husband's, that he be locked up and receive intensive psychiatric help. Your husband is also too volatile to be having any visitations with his children, at this time, and this is another reason why you really must report his behaviour to law enforcement. He is a serious danger to you and his kids, and I wouldn't want to see this escalate to a murder-suicide, as it sounds like it very well could. He is possessive, and I easily see this turning into a rash "if I can't have them, no one can" decision, for him. Please do not chance it, for the sake of the kids.

Please remember that, when it comes to your husband being a danger to others, "in sickness and in health" no longer applies. You are not obligated to remain with him as his hostage, upon threat of suicide. You are not responsible any more, if he does succeed in this.

^^^^^^This^^^^^^
Get connected to you local domestic abuse services, notify the police, get a domestic abuse lawyer, cut contact with him, find a safehouse. You and your children are in danger. Do not delay, a few hours or days can make a horrible difference.
Thoughts and prayers coming your way.

I'd make the moves to protect yourself and your kids. Don't sit idly by as he continues to become more and more violent; be proactive. I have been in that situation with my daughter's father and to this day there's these little "pockets of psycho" pop up whenever he's not getting his way (she turned 11 on Friday) . If he's suicidal, do not allow the kids around him. Period. Go to the courthouse and seek full custody and ask for him to seek court-mandated counseling. Not saying that it'll work because 9 times out of ten, these guys never calm down, but this pattern can turn into violent events... fast. God knows that I know. Guys like him dwell on the negative and let it consume them until it turns to blind fury.

Protect yourself and your kids immediately.

I really don't think you should let him see the children.... If he does that to his brother and sister what's to say he won't take it out on the kids. I'd contact the police for advice... Yes I have been there.... No kids but I had a horrendous time of it. Took a year for the police to get rid of him. My life is so much better now though! X

I was in a similar situation to yours when I was younger. I got with a guy when I was 16, he was so sweet, years went on and he became verbally abusive and possessive. When I would try to leave he would treated to hurt himself and I would always feel bad and go back. it only got worse, he would cheat on me, always be gone with his friends yet flip out when I went anywhere, tell everyone that I was a *kitten* if I did leave the house because he assumed I was cheating. Then finally in an argument he hit me, and I thought to myself "it wasn't that bad because we were both mad and his temper is just way worse than mine", in the next few years it kept happening but my self esteem was already lie from the verbal abuse that when the physical was going on I did nothing about it, I had already alliterated myself from friends and family so he would constantly threaten to throw me out and I'd be homeless or even worse kill me and know one would care (his words). One time in an argument in the car he was so mad that he purposely drove us off of an elavated highway. And then at 20 I got pregnant, I felt a little relieved at first because I was young and Nieve and thought that finally things would go back to how they used to be, nothing changed. When I was 6 months pregnant I was hospitalized for a month due to fluid leaking, we lived right down the street from the hospital yet he only visited twice. He even convinced me to sign myself out of the hospital against medical wishes so his mom could give me a baby shower, when I went back after the shower I had to have an emergency c section at 7 months pregnant. Luckily my baby was ok, small but ok. But she was difficult, and I had no help. He still was partying, abusive, etc. and against what my doctor said, would make me have sex with him. I got pregnant again. By this time I was already planning my escape because I knew my daughter deserves better, I contemplated abortion but decided against it. I left him when I was 4 months pregnant in the middle of the night when he was partying and I moved to Las Vegas, my mother and brother lived there. of coarse when he found out he was furious. But when he found out he couldn't get to me he decided to move there too. skip ahead, one day after I had already had the second baby, she was about 2 months, I got a knock on the door of the very drunk ex, who of which I already had a no contact and keep away order on, my apartments didn't have apeep hole so instead of saying who is it I opened the door while holding my 2 month old, he immediately started beating me while holding her and my other watching. He wanted to kill me, he said it himself. I slipped away and tried to call the police and he broke my phone. Some how I managed to grab the kids and run to a neighbors to call the police. He had stayed in my house thewhole time trashing it thinking they could convince the police that I lived like a slob and he was just trying to see the kids. It's been about 5 years since that happened and though I've never denied him visitations with the children they are always in public and supervised, which is why he would rather not see them (though he still tries to guilt me into thinking I'm the reason he doesn't see his kids). I am married now to an amazing military man who would nevereven raise his voice to me. I feel so lucky to have wised up because I know I could have been dead.

I know this was long but I hope you take something away from my story and know that when everyone is telling you that your situation is bad you need to listen to them before it gets worse.

bring people with you or do it through solicitors / courts

you have gotten plenty of good advice from those that have been there..but it is useless to you unless you follow it...dont believe the not dangerous parts...

Your husband is acting out in so many ways that I don't know how you can keep track of them. He is manipulative and will stop at nothing to get his way. Get yourself and your kids to safety, somewhere unknown to him. Get an order of protection. Do not see him alone. Limit your telephone contact to text. He hasn't abused you yet? He will if he gets the chance. You can bet your life on it. Good luck.

^^This. Be careful. He sounds desperate and that spells danger. I've been there. Do not see him alone (with or without your kids).

Push for supervised visitation and mandatory counseling for him. This is no way for your kids to behave especially since they're so young