Dumped

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Replies

  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    Don't go back to the guy who dumped you either.

    This. Be brave and strong.
  • _Wits_
    _Wits_ Posts: 1,286 Member
    Well to be honest be best way to make it through it is to feel it but not get stuck there. Four years is a long time and the relationship should be grieved and reflected upon. The good and the bad. But just keep it moving. Don't erect any wall or barriers. Stay open and know that this too shall pass.

    This.

    Good luck to you ! xo
  • djsupreme6
    djsupreme6 Posts: 1,210 Member
    Don't go back to the guy who dumped you either.

    This. Be brave and strong.

    coming from a guy do not do this..this can lead to disaster. It will get to him to see you getting along fine without him
  • joannathechef
    joannathechef Posts: 484 Member
    revenge sex - go out on the town and get yourself a nice bloke for a one night stand.

    Failing this (since your morals may prevent it) go SHOPPING and buy yourself something pretty
  • Falling_star
    Falling_star Posts: 204 Member
    get a new look new hair colour cut etc to show him what he is missing and hang out with ur friends and forget abt him good luck x
  • MrsLehman24
    MrsLehman24 Posts: 204 Member
    You are absolutely beautiful. Any man who would dump you is a damn fool.

    Maybe a happy ending doesn’t include a guy; maybe it’s you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over. Freeing up yourself to be something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is just moving on.
  • johnnys30
    johnnys30 Posts: 64 Member
    Sleep with his brother or best friend, or both, at once.
  • DarthCeltic
    DarthCeltic Posts: 1,236 Member
    Sleep with his brother or best friend, or both, at once.

    i find this works.. although not with a brother.. i mean more a sister.. or best friend that is a girl..
  • andeehrdz
    andeehrdz Posts: 59 Member
    My favorite quote for when I'm going through the mean reds comes from Elizabeth Taylor: Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick and pull yourself.
  • lambeas
    lambeas Posts: 229 Member
    #1 - Make the decision that it was for the best- hiss loss and his sad song when he realizes he was an idiot for losing you!

    #2 - Get in that gym and ramp up your weight training and cardio to pump that jerk out of your head. Make sure the next time you cross paths, that he sees how HOT you look and how dumb he was!

    #3 - Be happy that you did not waste one more second on someone that really does not appreciate how AWESOME you are.

    You rock sista.... a HUGE HUG to you...
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    Last weekend was one of the best I ever had. I completed my first 5K, which was first on my bucket list.

    Today, I got dumped after being together for 4 years.

    Ouch.

    The old me would immediately go home, get in my sweats along with my old pals Ben and Jerry and eat myself into a coma.

    I will NOT do that this time. I have come too far, worked too hard, accomplished too much to revert back to my old ways and a pint with a spoon.

    So....any advice on how to get past this without food? I worked out and that didn't really help. At this point, I am open to any suggestions.

    This sucks y'all. :frown:

    It's okay to take a few days to wallow, just don't use food as a crutch. If you need that helping of B&J's you need to get in the extra workout to do it, go out with your friends, watch all the sappy movies you want, do the things that you had to miss out on because he just wasn't into it, and then put that horse off for glue and move on.
  • One of my favorite things to do is work out more than ever before, do a mani, pedi, facial combo and soak in a bubble bath with a glass of wine and Classical Music. This sucks and you may feel icky inside but doing something you love may at least make it a little more bareable:( Do what you have to do, falling into old habits just make us feel worse.

    You got this!:wink:
  • silver_arrow3
    silver_arrow3 Posts: 1,373 Member
    My last breakup is fueling my progress. I started hitting the gym the Monday after we broke up, and I hit it hard.

    If your workout didn't work, then maybe it wasn't the right kind of work out. Last Wednesday I found out that a date I was REALLY looking forward to had to cancel. Wednesdays are my kickboxing days. I punched the ever living crap out of my invisible attacker and I felt good. Not so much the next day, though... I think I overdid it a little. :)
  • GlutesthatSalute
    GlutesthatSalute Posts: 460 Member
    READ Books, spend time with family and friends. You would be surprised at how releaving it is to just have someone near when you are going through something like this! Heartbreak is the WORST pain, it's like a tooth ache it is painful and relentless on reminding you something is not quite right.

    The most effective thing I learned to do is to simply replace ANY thoughts of him or the lack of him w positive thoughts! Affirmations repeated over and over help. Find a few go to affirmations and when you feel a thought creep in just keep repeating affirmations and or thoughts of somethin that DOES make you smile. I used to lay in bed and recite the serenity prayer! If you want any recommendations on helpful books let me know.

    Just remember darling that if he wasn't the right one as good as he might have been the right one will be 10x better...

    Ciao~Bella
  • Troll
    Troll Posts: 922 Member
    Last weekend was one of the best I ever had. I completed my first 5K, which was first on my bucket list.

    Today, I got dumped after being together for 4 years.

    Ouch.

    The old me would immediately go home, get in my sweats along with my old pals Ben and Jerry and eat myself into a coma.

    I will NOT do that this time. I have come too far, worked too hard, accomplished too much to revert back to my old ways and a pint with a spoon.

    So....any advice on how to get past this without food? I worked out and that didn't really help. At this point, I am open to any suggestions.

    This sucks y'all. :frown:

    ouch, im sorry sweetie :( my advice is focus on the positive of the 5k. go get a makeover, get some girlfriends together and do mani/pedis to match your favorite outfit (try water marbling. takes a while so you can chat, and the results are hilarious until you get really good at it). i know its cheesy, but im trying to thinkof what id do if my fiance and i split after our seven years. id probably go for a run, way out into the woods, and sob all i needed to. then id punch the punching bag until my hands hurt. then id call my mom and we'd do each others makeup and nails and lsugh at how silly we looked. honestly, if he and i split id probably call my inlaws and tell them everything i didnt get to say for seven years.....but thats just me. hope you find happiness despite this, and please dont hesitate to friend me if i can help at all!
  • Fighter
    Going through the same thing now and love that song :)
  • Fat2Fit4Life
    Fat2Fit4Life Posts: 599 Member
    Crochet a blanket. By the time you finish it, you'll be feeling better.

    I SO totally thought you wrote "Crotch Blanket" at first. LOL! I was like, how is that going to help!?!
  • I haven't read all that was posted but I can relat esome what to what you are going thorugh I have a son with a man /boy 6 years older we were together for 5 years. after 3 afairs and his drug/alcohol habbit we ended it with the last affair he had and I went into a deep deep depression and gained alot of weight and i'm tellin gyou its not worth going there. I am again facing difficult situations involving my still ex and food is tempting but for me I pick up my bible and turn to the word. I call some support from girlfriends and even guy friends and go out . for me journeling seemed to help as well,. I know you'll be able to defeat this and when you start doing things for you and youself you will find how much easier and more freeing it feels. try not to get into the place wher eyou feel i'll get back at him and shwo him what he lost... becuase you'll be doing everything for the wrong reason. be you and learn to love you without any one elses approval and you'll find the depression decreases as you gain confidance in who you are.
  • davert123
    davert123 Posts: 1,568 Member
    Don't stop what you are doing - poke him in the eye by getting as fit as a fiddle and then start pulling hunks :-) good luck
  • davert123
    davert123 Posts: 1,568 Member
    You are absolutely beautiful. Any man who would dump you is a damn fool.

    Maybe a happy ending doesn’t include a guy; maybe it’s you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over. Freeing up yourself to be something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is just moving on.

    ^^^^^Yea This is it
  • munchkinhugs
    munchkinhugs Posts: 278 Member
    Reflect on it. Talk to someone about it.

    One of my friends said her psych told her to do this:
    Put up a note on your fridge and write down a few things about him that really used to annoy you. Look at it daily and add to it if you can think of more... Then be grateful that you have the chance to meet someone else without those annoying habits :D
  • buckeyes502
    buckeyes502 Posts: 32 Member
    Congrats on the 5k!!! Don't worry about getting dumped...you will find another. Use this energy to focus on your goals.
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,855 Member
    Imagine a day in the future when you are at your goal and feeling like your old hot self and you have some eye candy on your arm and you run into your ex. He is alone and looks like he's coming off a weekend bender. Hold that image in your mind.

    That mental picture is your motivation.
  • Silver_Star
    Silver_Star Posts: 1,351 Member
    Im so sorry =( total DonkeyButt of a guy to do that to you.

    but i am very glad that youre wanting a different route to deal with it other than food.


    Grab your friends and hang out with them....spending time with other people can really help it ease off a bit...dont be alone for too long...the fridge starts to look pretty good then!!

    i find, volunteering at a charity helps....it really does..takes your mind of your problems and helps you figure out how to help someones else who's hurting..but in a different way. :flowerforyou: