So...My mom died.
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I am so sorry for your loss. Glad to know that you're taking the bull by the horns and affecting your own health in such a positive way. If I can offer any advice at all, it would be:
Don't rush. Slow and steady will give you, more likely, permanent results. It is wonderful to be so motivated and serious about your goal(s), but it is my experience that when I rush and lose the weight I want, I gain it all back eventually, and then some. Also, when I go at it full force, I tend to burn out w/in a matter of days, and lose the will to continue the fight.
Now, because I want this change to be permanent, I am tracking my calories, working out five days a week (but not killing myself doing it) for about an hour each day. I am losing 1 to 1.5 lbs per week. When I entered my stats, MFP set me up to start out at 1200 cal. per day. I make sure I net about that ea. day (give or take about 100) by eating about 1200 calories each day, PLUS whatever calories I may have burned off on a given day. So I always NET close to that 1200 goal.
I don't worry too much about the details. I just try to make healthy food choices MOST of the time. And, I allow for my treats. There is nothing that I cannot eat, so long as I have room in my calorie allowance.
I wish you lots of luck, and the will to keep going. You should be very proud of yourself for taking the first step.0 -
My mom also died due to complications from obesity. It takes a lot of work and commitment to pick yourself up, face yourself in the mirror and relize that this is going to be hard work. So far I've lost 63lbs.
If you would like to be support buddies, please feel free to add me.0 -
you got this!!!! use MFP as a support and choice to make a change!! good luck!
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I am so sorry for your loss.
It is good that something good comes of it though. You can do it with this kind of proper motivation. The will power comes from inside and outside. But you have to really want it, as it seems you do.
As most have said, keeping track of your nutrition and getting moving are key points. Support is important, too.
My own motivation came from looking at a picture of myself one day and going, "Wow!! I look like that now? I have to fix this!". I really didn't like what I saw or how tired I got from doing the things I loved to do with my kids. Do what it takes to keep yourself going, because you ARE worth the work!0 -
I'm so sorry that you lost your Mom. And especially to something like obesity and it's complications. I'm only 28 but I have been pushing weight loss off for over 10 years and I know if I don't take action I'll find myself struggling even more at age 50. I recently got into a great cycle of eating right and exercising and lost over 15 pounds but then I got the flu followed by pneumonia and being too sick and too tired to exercise or cook healthy meals I gained it back. HOWEVER, having spent three months working hard towards learning proper eating and exercising before I got sick, now that I'm feeling better and ready to start back up, I know it's not impossible. I know it will take time but I know that the results of my hard work will bring me so much happiness and pride. What helped me get going was some women at a local church putting on a mini biggest loser competition. Having that support and motivation to get to weigh in every Monday weighing at least one pound less was awesome. If you can find one or even start one I would definitely recommend it.
I know you can reach your goal and I know you can by the time your daughter gets married!
Also, I read that starting with 15 minutes a day of brisk walking for the first two weeks is best. Week three go to 30 minutes for a couple of weeks and then start a more intense work out program. I know my body really resisted weightloss for the first few weeks because I threw myself into it full speed. I was really frustrated. Once it adjusted and I upped my calorie intake a bit (from 1200 to 1600) and brought weights into my workout, the weight started coming off.0 -
In 1987, my mother died of a massive heart attack one week after her 57th. birthday. She was overweight all her life. I could see myself following in her footsteps. I have lost & gained, lost & gained more times than I can count. Then this year I got a wake up call when diagnosed pre-diabetic. I have already overcome breast cancer but the diabetes scare finally woke me up to reality.I have lost 12 lbs. so far, just 1 lb. a week but I am finally seeing that I need a support system and need to do it slowly & correctly. Do not rush it. Take it one day at a time and one pound at a time. We are all here for you. I will friend you, contact me any time. I am 59 and want to live a long life.0
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Welcome. You don't even know how incredible you will feel when you start eating healthy (and hopefully stop smoking!!) Don't you even dare think that you will smoke in place of eating! You cannot workout and burn the calories you need to burn when you can't breathe. I say this because I know first hand.
I'm sorry for your loss and wish you the best in your new life! You can do it.0 -
So sorry for the loss of your mom. You have made a wonderful decision to start taking care of yourself - I know you can do it!
Please feel free to add me as a friend; I would love to be able to offer you support.0 -
Wow! I'm sorry to hear about your mom but I am happy to hear that you're making positive changes to improve your help! I'm sending a FR on the double! Let's do it together!!!:flowerforyou: 0
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I'm so sorry about your mom. My mom also died this past February. She had just turned 64 a few days prior. Her health story was pretty complex. Sometimes I forget that she was overweight at one point when she was diagnosed with diabetes when I was just little. She had lost weight over the years and in her last few years, she had no appetite, was very thin and malnourished. She never ate or exercised properly to manage her diabetes and while she insisted that she felt fine, the disease was wreaking havoc on the inside. She had numerous complications including eye and feet problems. Luckily she never lost any toes or feet though. She was always a fighter though and had gotten through dialysis, kidney transplant, liver transplant, not to mention all the eye surgeries.
It was shortly after her death that I ended up on MFP and trying to get healthier. Partly because I want to avoid going through anything even close to what she did but also because I knew how much it upset her to see me so miserable since I started gaining weight. I'm sure our mom's would be very, very pleased to see us improving ourselves so let's do it!0 -
I am so sorry for the loss of your mom. She would be proud to know that you are working on getting healthy.
I am 57, and I know exactly how you feel! I have gained and lost for years. My goal now is to just get healthier!! I do weigh myself, but don't worry as much on what the scale says. I can tell in my clothes and how I feel, and that is more important. Just take it one day at a time! And, if you eat too much today, don't stress over it. Sometimes I just need a cookie!!
I did give up diet coke 5 weeks ago, and I think that has helped! And, I have drank diet coke for years!! I don't have the bloated feeling anymore and I don't get as hungry!
I do exercise a little, not as much as I should, but I'm trying to do better.
Hang in there and just take it one step at a time!!0 -
I'm sorry for your very sad loss. What a heartbreaking story.
You've already taken a very big important step toward a new healthy life. Congratulations.0 -
Thank you for sharing your story! My condolences to you and your family. This story hits close to home. My mom and I are 20 years apart; she is 57 and I 37. She has always been over weight and by set standards so have I. I have decided to make the initiative to lose weight and eat correctly. I want my children to see what healthy eating is and portion control. I am on the healthy track and my mom has started a special diet to control her diabetes and other issues circling around not having a gallbladder and now being diagnosed with a fatty liver. I really hope and pray that it's not too late for my mom to get all this under control and lose the weight she needs to in order to be around for years to come. God bless everyone and cheers to all the weight loss, healthy eating and living another day! xoxo0
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I am so sorry to hear about your loss. You have many supporters here. Friend me if you would like! It is hard and I wasn't very obese - pretty "average" to today's standards, but want to lose 20 to be at my actual ideal healthy weight. But I still smoke and if to be brief, this is what I can offer for advice from my experience. Don't quite smoking and diet. You are already improving your health by exercising and losing weight. The smoking can come next after you settle in. (I ran a 10 mile race - my first in 91 minutes and had a cigarette after... not to qualify... but show smoking won't impeed for now and doing both isn't smart for mood, cravings...etc). Be diligent and ALWAYS mark your food. Some days you WILL NOT like what you see, but calories even out in a week. So keep yourself honest. EXERCISE GOES A LONG WAY. Vary it. You WILL be hungry... maybe for the first month...but as long as you are in the right zone you are okay (if you burn 500 calories extra with exercise, you can eat 1000 calories if you are still above at your ideal level for calorie intake for your loss desires.) You will likely get a huge first loss or second, but then it tends to plateau... remember... it all adds up just like you said about how you put it on. My mom weighs more than you and she has been on this for quite some time and has lost about 25 pounds, averaging 1-2 lbs a week. She is disappointed in that, but realizes, wow I've lost 25! Finally, only allow yourself to weigh yourself once a week. Good luck!0
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Sorry about your mom but it sounds that her tragedy has enabled you to see your infinite possibilities. I'm sure she would be proud and would want for you to find your way to a longer, healthier life. Best wishes on your journey!0
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You can do this...for your mom, your daughter and most of all yourself. I will share with you a statement my son (who has lost 74 lbs) made to me when he was encouraging me to do MFP. He said mom, "what difference does it make how long it takes to lose your weight? This is not a race...focus on your goal, not on what the scale says each day!" Before, with every diet I tried, I became frustrated if I didn't see a significant "scale reading" each week. Now I look at the long term goal. I ask myself each day, where can I be by Oct, Nov. Feb, May ...not just tomorrow?
This is a LIFE CHANGE, not a diet. MFP has completely changed the way I look at food. Like you said, our portions and what we see as normal, are actually way more food than our body needs to function properly. I am 57 and I have 27 pounds to go. But I will get there using MFP.
Record all calories each and every day. This will be an enlightenment and has helped me to be honest with myself about the food I CAN do without. Simple exercise, like walking can make a big difference too. You don't have to run a marathon. Get support from friends and be kind to yourself.
I wish you the very best in achieving your goal. I miss my mom, who passed a year and a half ago, but I know she is rooting me on each day. YOU CAN DO THIS!0 -
I am so sorry about your mom. You can achieve your goal and I would love to encourage you on your journey! Sending a friend request 0
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I am sorry for your loss. There are no words anyone can say that will take the pain away. I commend you for wanting to improve your health, not only for yourself, but for your family.
I have been there myself. I lost my mother when I was 22, she was at the young age of 48. Her death was sudden, cardiomyopathy is what the doctors said.
My mother too, was lost in her obesity.. she would eat but never have the energy to exercise. On her "good days", we would go shopping, weed the garden and play games. But for a week after she wouldn't be able to do much. I commend her for doing what she could.
I have two children of my own and want nothing more than to be around for them as long as I possibly can.
Congratulations to you on this new journey in your life and best of luck to you! Have FAITH in yourself and you WILL achieve anything you put your mind to! :flowerforyou:0 -
I'm so sorry about your mom but I'm glad to see you are taking the steps to be healthier. I know your daughter is grateful too. Good job!0
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Wow. Your story is very touching. Welcome to the site. There are lots of great people here. Your goal seems very reachable just keep up the hard work and you will get there.0
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I too am sorry to hear of the loss of your mother! But want to thank you for sharing your story! People like her is my inspiration to lose weight & get healthy as well! We CAN do this! I'm sending a friend request as well! I'd love to cheer ya along! You have some great goals! (((Hugs)))0
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Wow!!
Words cant express how I feel to read your story, But let that be your inspiration.. God is able..0 -
I lost my dad at 67 last year sept 15. IT was cancer. It is tough. The experience horrifying. Feels like yesterday...0
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Bravo! My condolences to you and your family. What a positive way to honor her.0
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I am really sorry that you lost your Mom and at such a young age, but I commend you for making the decision to make different choices. Your Mom would be (is) proud of you!
I know you can do this! I suggest including exercise - even if it is just walking. It makes the journey easier. One it raises your metabolism and two, it provides more calories for you to eat and still lose weight. I usually don't eat all of my exercise calories, but I do enjoy having the freedom to eat some of them. Others swear by the tactic of eating them all. In any case, exercise is your friend.
Tena0 -
I'm sorry for your loss...
My father and my dear cousin died from the complications of their obesity-diabetes, hypertension, arteriosclerosis and my husband is also showing symptoms of weight related diseases.
It is a big decision to begin a journey which will fundamentally change your entire life. It's more than weightloss (which is great) but for me it was a decision to stop focusing on my weight and start looking at how I was living, my quality of life, and what I was eating. It is about making different choices every day and then seeing how those choices create the kind of life you want to live.
MFP has been great because it helped release me from the diet and excercise rollercoaster fueled by my best intentions.
Now I can clearly see what I eat everyday and it has helped me make better choices each day and to see the results each day. Now I am accountable to myself on a daily basis and have a support group to provide advice and encouragement. This is the first time I've felt that this will be a permanent loss and not just an other diet in order to lose a few pound which I quickly regain with interest.
My one recommendation is to take it slowly as this is a lifelong commitment and it will take to change the habits of a lifetime. Getting the hang of building menus and finding foods to fill you up and finding the time to fit in the exercise everyday take some doing but is totally achievable.
Good luck!0 -
You just inspired me to give it a go even though I feel like crap. thank you 0
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I enjoyed reading your story very much. I am going thru the same problems and just started this life-changing site a week ago due to my sisters and have lost about 9 pounds so far. I agree with you that the more support you have the more it will motivate you. Keep working at it for your daughter's big day!!0
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I am sorry about you losing your mom. :brokenheart: I lost mine a few years ago and for the same reasons.
My mom died at 80 years of age and I am now 63, four years younger than your mom was.
I can relate to this. I am Type 2 diabetic because of being obese. I got a good report from
my doctor this month that it seems with diet and exercise I have that beat. Now we are
trying to get the cholesterol in check. I am in the 180's of onderland but not where I should be
for my health issues. That is why I joined this site. I will friend you and we can go on this journey
together. You have lots of time now to get your act together and start losing this weight.
What a wonderful goal you have now, your daughter's wedding. :bigsmile:
My next goal is going to Europe with my two daughter's next summer. I need to lose so I can enjoy
myself on this trip and not worry about what I am eating.
Good luck with your journey, I am sure you will make your goal with alot of hard work. Keep us posted
how you are doing.
Shirley0 -
I am very sorry for the loss of your mom. My mom died in February 2005 at the age of 54 from multiple organ failure due to congestive heart failure. I was six months pregnant with my first child. She was a smoker, had diabetes and was overweight. Point blank, she didn't take care of herself. I, myself was a smoker and knew if I continued, I too would die at a young age. I quit smoking and approximately a year after she passed, I started exercising. I want to do what is within my power to be around for my children and for them to look at me as a role model. At first, I joined Curves and walked a few times per week. Now, I have completed my third half marathon and workout with weights (up to a 25lb kettlebell) between four to five times per week.
You can do this. Good days and bad days...keep pushing ahead. Being around for your children and future grandchildren will be your motivators.0
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