Next Male Honesty answers needed Please.

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  • Anomalia
    Anomalia Posts: 506 Member
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    You shave EVERY day?! I would get razor burned to death if I did that.
  • GamerGurl729
    GamerGurl729 Posts: 286 Member
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    How are your finances? When people date, it's all about the date, the activity, the conquest, but when two people are married it is a life long commitment. Unfortunately men are not always the sex craved individuals we are cast to be, sometimes everyday stress, financial concerns, physical worries, and medical issues all cause a lack of sexual drive. Additionally, when pressured into a situation the feeling of having to preform is overwhelming and if our body is not cooperating then you add embarrassment and frustration to the pile and the easiest way to avoid all of it is to not attempt to engage in sexual activity. So my guess is that somewhere in this is where he is at the moment.

    So what to do? First off be patient, just because he can not do what you want him to do does not mean he does not want to do it. Next, Instead of pressuring him or attempting to talk him into a pill he may not want to try, you be his pill. What I mean is walk up to him and kiss him, sincerely but not longingly, reach down and gently rub across his troubled area as you end the kiss and tell him you love him and walk away.

    It may take a few days, but eventually he may respond in the manner you want. If after a few days he still is unresponsive then you may want to sit down and have a conversation about it, just avoid being negative or placing blame, something like "I am concerned why we no longer ....... " I love you and if there is something I need to do, please tell me " Then if he responds with the "it's not you, your perfect" you should suggest seeking medical advice as a last resort. He probably won't like that idea, no one wants to tell a doctor they are having those problems, it is male ego and it is a ***** to get over.

    I am not a doctor, nor any kind of psychologist, but I am male and you asked for advice, so there is mine. I hope it helps and good luck.

    I love this response. Thank you!
  • KatKisses
    KatKisses Posts: 296 Member
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    get a boy toy for some sneaky sneaky nookie!
  • zenchild
    zenchild Posts: 680 Member
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    If he's unwilling to talk at all you don't have many options. You can tell him that he needs to see a doctor and then a counselor, or a divorce lawyer. Or you can live in a sexless marriage. Your choice.
  • lil_bit_crazy
    lil_bit_crazy Posts: 161 Member
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    i PM you about some..but about the sleeping on the couch thing i will answer here,

    I have been married 17 years. If I'm not comfy in bed, I'll sleep on my couch, or in one of my sons beds, or i'll flip and lay at the opposite end of my own bed, or sometimes i even rearrange the covers on our bed and we sleep sideways in bed. I've layed blankets on the living room floor before to get comfy at 2 am, I sleep in the recliner..hell, I've even told HIM to go sleep on the couch or floor or chair because i cant get comfy...and sometimes when i really cant sleep, i lay on his chest and his heartbeat knocks me right out.
    sleeping in places other than bed doesnt mean cheating. i've NEVER cheated, never had a desire to. but if i aint comfy, i will find a way to get comfy.
    cheating is a stong accusation, so dont use it unless you have unmistakable undeniable proof, not just a hunch or because someone "said" so.
  • karynspeace
    karynspeace Posts: 132
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    I shelled out thousands for a tempurpedic king size bed and I sleep in it alone most nights - especially during football season. More room for me... let him sleep. If he is stupid enough to sleep on a couch, that's his loss- Its a GREAT bed! :laugh:
  • azzkikin
    azzkikin Posts: 458 Member
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    Maybe he found himself a maid, nurse, teacher or school girl that he has on the side already. Now he just needs his meals made and house clean.
  • marathon64
    marathon64 Posts: 378 Member
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    FACT-people can have major differences in their sex drives. We usually think it's the man who wants it all the time but women can be much more interested and it can be a physiological thing as much as a mental one. hormones play a part for you too...

    The diabetes does make it harder for men to perform sexually and that itself can diminish desire

    I move to the couch when I wake up and can't fall back asleep-that by itself is less worrisome. The issue is how you feel about the sexual stuff. Maybe it's just not that important to you. if it is then let him know pointe blank.
  • peachhunting
    peachhunting Posts: 59 Member
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    I don't think the issue is about sleeping on the couch. I sleep in a separate bed most nights. Started when our kids were young and now have just grown accustomed to sleeping alone and having the best sleep ever.

    But, if my wife asked me to come to bed for some nookie, I'd be there like a 10 peckered owl. I know a few guys that can't be bothered with sex most of the time. This is NOT normal. I've almost thought of asking them if I could nail their wives for them, just to help out a buddy...

    This sounds horrible, and I am not trying to be a pig here, but if you are really getting frustrated, get him a beer, sit him down, unzip his pants and start the oral exam. The extra calories won't hurt you. If THAT doesn't get him, then yes, you have issues that are bigger than you think...(cheating, gay...?)
  • rob1976
    rob1976 Posts: 1,328 Member
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    You shave EVERY day?! I would get razor burned to death if I did that.
    If you do it everyday, your skin becomes accustomed to it and adjusts to not be irritated.

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