Men/women I need your honest opinions please...
trying2findmyway
Posts: 31
in Chit-Chat
I'm talking and going out on dates with an ex of mine again...
We've had the relationship where we have been off and on... but strangely enough when we were "off" he was the only guy I thought about it and I found/find it very hard to get past him. I don't know what it is. I guess I cared for him more than I thought.
There were issues and I often thought we were not compatible.
There were times when I was in tears because of things between him and I ... truthfully when I look back I think why the hell am I talking to him.
So, like I said we are communicating again and things have been generally nice. When I'm around him it feels natural...
But I can't help but think back on the things that bothered me and the issues we had.
He seems different... like he cares a great deal more.
How do I know he's genuine? How do I know I'm not just someone who he thinks will always be there :brokenheart:
What do I do?
am I just desperate and lonely or could this ex of mine possibly be meant for me :S
Men please help me out
and women who have been in my shoes. I know exes don't usually work out... but maybe there is an exception? :indifferent:
I sound stupid.
Just some honest opinions please
We've had the relationship where we have been off and on... but strangely enough when we were "off" he was the only guy I thought about it and I found/find it very hard to get past him. I don't know what it is. I guess I cared for him more than I thought.
There were issues and I often thought we were not compatible.
There were times when I was in tears because of things between him and I ... truthfully when I look back I think why the hell am I talking to him.
So, like I said we are communicating again and things have been generally nice. When I'm around him it feels natural...
But I can't help but think back on the things that bothered me and the issues we had.
He seems different... like he cares a great deal more.
How do I know he's genuine? How do I know I'm not just someone who he thinks will always be there :brokenheart:
What do I do?
am I just desperate and lonely or could this ex of mine possibly be meant for me :S
Men please help me out
and women who have been in my shoes. I know exes don't usually work out... but maybe there is an exception? :indifferent:
I sound stupid.
Just some honest opinions please
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Replies
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I did this for like three years with my ex. I couldn't get past... His baby with another chick (that he impregnated while we were together). Oh, and all the other girls he did god knows what with during the same time period. Aside from that, he was just in general a selfish jerk who was a FANTASTIC smooth talker (among other things that wouldn't contribute to his personality, but definitely contributed to my desire to be with him).
Only you can decide. I feel that an ex is an ex for a reason.. Wish I wouldn't have wasted SO much freaking time on the dude. If you're questioning it.. Well.. You probably should just run. Fast. Or maybe stick it out and take the chance. I don't know. Maybe he could be an exception, or maybe he's just a ticking time bomb.
You didn't give a whole lot of detail.. There's issues that are extreme and there's issues that are petty. You have to figure out if those issues are going to resurface and if they do, what you're going to do about it.0 -
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He became an EX for a reason! old dogs new trick, not happening in the long run!0
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You will never know for sure. You have to decide if he's worth taking the chance on. If you can forget the past and it feels right, go for it. If you can't, then move on.0
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No.
If he is an ex, he is done.
You are probably missing the companionship more than the person.
Need to go out and spend time with other guys, you will find one
who will make you forget about your ex.0 -
You're only going to know if he's being genuine if you start down that path with him and find out that he's not. However, if you're going to attempt a relationship with him again, you'll need to let go of the past completely. And if you can't get over the past, it would probably be a good idea to not even try.0
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It's called a break up cause it's broken...0
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<---- Just add bacon, as the shirt says bacon makes it better.0
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Just break up.0
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Just break up.0
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Just move on ..0
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Yeah, been there...usually they don't change, they just like the chase. But so many of us women like the bad boy, like to think we'll be the one that will tame them. But once a *kitten*, always a *kitten*. Life it too short to make the same mistakes...go find a new *kitten* to make a mistake with...at least it gives you a fighting chance to get a different result.
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.0 -
If you've already had an on-again-off-again relationship, and this is a third or fourth try, that should probably tell you something. Also, time matters here--if you've been apart 2 months and he says he's changed (or seems to have changed) he probably hasn't, if it's been years, and there have been other major changes in his life, then it is *possible* he has changed.0
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I'm talking and going out on dates with an ex of mine again...
We've had the relationship where we have been off and on... but strangely enough when we were "off" he was the only guy I thought about it and I found/find it very hard to get past him. I don't know what it is. I guess I cared for him more than I thought.
There were issues and I often thought we were not compatible.
There were times when I was in tears because of things between him and I ... truthfully when I look back I think why the hell am I talking to him.
So, like I said we are communicating again and things have been generally nice. When I'm around him it feels natural...
But I can't help but think back on the things that bothered me and the issues we had.
He seems different... like he cares a great deal more.
How do I know he's genuine? How do I know I'm not just someone who he thinks will always be there :brokenheart:
What do I do?
am I just desperate and lonely or could this ex of mine possibly be meant for me :S
Men please help me out
and women who have been in my shoes. I know exes don't usually work out... but maybe there is an exception? :indifferent:
I sound stupid.
Just some honest opinions please
move on start fresh with someone else no need to live in the past0 -
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
Let me introduce you to a little thing called a stochastic process, life is full of them.0 -
You should only listen to your heart. But, if you do decided to give him another chance, you need to forgive him for the things in the past. It will never work if you don't.0
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Move forward. NEVER go back...there is a reason he is an ex - and you need to remember EVERY single reason he gave you to be done with him. He hasnt changed - he is just nice now but remember you saw his true self and that is who he is. RUN AWAY and do it quickly. You are sticking around because it is comfortable - but ask yourself if you deserve someone like him. The answer is NO - no woman deserves a man like that...the unfortunate thing is you are probably looking for someone to validate the fact that you are going to date him again. Once a douche always a douche...0
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You're only going to know if he's being genuine if you start down that path with him and find out that he's not. However, if you're going to attempt a relationship with him again, you'll need to let go of the past completely. And if you can't get over the past, it would probably be a good idea to not even try.
VERY good advice. VERY good.0 -
just end it.
youre thinking about the GOOD times only.. remember why he is an ex..0 -
Sometimes people do change. I married a man...divorced him 7 years later and a year after that remarried him. We just celebrated our 16th wedding anniversary. You didn't list many details, so its really up to you to decide if its worth your time to see if its good or not. No one will know but you. Good luck.0
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The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
Do you own a copy of Supreme 90 day?0 -
Good relationships aren't hard to be in0
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Been in this situation!
Girl, don't do it, it's not worth it!!
It may seems like he's changed,for a little while.
Then bam, your in the same boat again crying and not knowing what to do!0 -
History tends to repeat itself when we don't learn from it.
Find someone new and start over. Exes are exes for a reason.0 -
You're only going to know if he's being genuine if you start down that path with him and find out that he's not. However, if you're going to attempt a relationship with him again, you'll need to let go of the past completely. And if you can't get over the past, it would probably be a good idea to not even try.
THIS.
Although, I feel your icon is quite appropriate...take a deep breath and let go. There is a reason he is your ex several times over.0 -
I did this fo YEARS with an ex.
After 10 years of on again, off again, I realized that I wasn't giving anyone else a real chance- I was comparing every new relationship to the one I had with Mr, X... Then one day it suddenly hit me- I realized no one would ever live u-p to Mr. X ... of course new guy didn't know me as well asMr. xx, I'd only been on 3 dates with him, of course new guy doesn't automatically know what drinks to order me, or what my favorite moves were... it was totally unfair to compare any new guys to Mr. X, because he had all those years of experience on them-
Finally, on the day this hit me, as painful as it was (when we weren't dating, we were still very close friends)... one day I sat Mr. X down and told him that I knew I would never be open to a relationship with anyone else as long as he was in my life. That was the last time I ever spoke to him.
It was hard, it sucked for a log time, but, in the end it was the best decision I ever made. About a year later, I met my future husband- we are about to hit our 3 year wedding anniversay, and I have never even ONCE been sorry I shut the door on my friendship and relationship with Mr. X.0 -
I did this for like three years with my ex. I couldn't get past... His baby with another chick (that he impregnated while we were together). Oh, and all the other girls he did god knows what with during the same time period. Aside from that, he was just in general a selfish jerk who was a FANTASTIC smooth talker (among other things that wouldn't contribute to his personality, but definitely contributed to my desire to be with him).
I think we dated the same guy...0 -
We split. We got back together. We celebrate our 30 year anniversary next year.
There are no rules, you have to work it out for yourself I'm afraid.0 -
<---- Just add bacon, as the shirt says bacon makes it better.
Hard to argue this one0 -
I never understand how women can do this to themselves.
Just get rid of him, cut all cords, and never, ever, ever talk to him again.
End of story.0
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