I think a healthy lifestyle change made me 'boring'

When I decided to lose weight, I stopped drinking and smoking weed for obvious reasons (too high in calories, makes me lazy/tired, no motivation, etc) and now I have nothing to do on weekends and it seems like no one wants to hang out with me anymore. I understand that I have to be boring for a little if I want to make changes, but not being around people makes me isolated and depressed. I don't know what to fill my time with besides going out and exercising. Which is good, but that doesn't take 12 hours to do. Ugh, I don't want to be alone. What would you guys suggest I do to take my mind off of things and will fulfill my weekends?
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Replies

  • belladonna786
    belladonna786 Posts: 1,165 Member
    Find new friends? Healthy ones to hang with
  • I would suggest you try and make/meet some like minded health conscious friends. There are lots of groups on here that meet up to work out together, walk, run etc.... Sort of the same mind set when a drunk comes clean, you can't hang at the bars with your buds.... gotta make new friends or you'll fall right back into the habit. Good Luck.
  • adamlb
    adamlb Posts: 106 Member
    Find new friends? Healthy ones to hang with
    My thoughts exactly! Either that, or you could try to convert your friends...
  • misty0413
    misty0413 Posts: 212
    new friends and a hobby.
  • Graceious1
    Graceious1 Posts: 716 Member
    I agree with the posters here. When you make lifestyle changes you will lose people. Best thing to do is hang with like minded people.
  • cgfol1
    cgfol1 Posts: 179 Member
    Why dont you find someone who wants to exercise with you? Or make friends at the gym?
  • Lesley2901
    Lesley2901 Posts: 372 Member
    Find new friends? Healthy ones to hang with

    ^Exactly^
    Your lifestyle and interests have changed, find friends who have similar ideas and goals
  • plushkitten
    plushkitten Posts: 547 Member
    The only place I go and socialize is at my college and it seems like every one I meet likes to go out and party.
    But I will try to look for groups or clubs that interest me and go from there.

    :)
  • elizabethis
    elizabethis Posts: 155 Member
    If you get into running, there are usually lots of races - 5K, 10K, mini-marathons, etc. around. Between training runs and races on Saturdays, that takes up quite a bit of time. Find someone to run with. Also, I tend to cook a fair amount on the weekend for the week ahead. That means yummier, healthier things to eat through the week without having to cook when you're tired and don't feel like it! Stick to your convictions.....You'll make the adjustments and be so much happier for it! Oh, I see you are in college and maybe NOT cooking, but eating in cafeterias. In that case, this won't help you.
  • KittieLea
    KittieLea Posts: 1,156 Member
    Yeah, find a new hobby. maybe join a gym? I go to the gym at the same time each morning and have made quite a few friends there who do the same. Maybe try playing a sport? Roller derby would be fun!
  • WinnerVictorious
    WinnerVictorious Posts: 4,733 Member
    When I decided to lose weight, I stopped drinking and smoking weed for obvious reasons (too high in calories, makes me lazy/tired, no motivation, etc) and now I have nothing to do on weekends and it seems like no one wants to hang out with me anymore. I understand that I have to be boring for a little if I want to make changes, but not being around people makes me isolated and depressed. I don't know what to fill my time with besides going out and exercising. Which is good, but that doesn't take 12 hours to do. Ugh, I don't want to be alone. What would you guys suggest I do to take my mind off of things and will fulfill my weekends?

    you don't need to be drunk or stoned to be interesting.

    in fact, as you get a little bit older, you'll realize that people who go through life drunk and/or stoned are losers and you shouldn't waste your time trying to be like them.

    there are lots of people out there who don't drink (or only drink occasionally) and don't do drugs. in fact, that's most people. they lead fun, productive, happy lives. there's alot to do in life that doesn't revolve around recreational drug use.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    The only place I go and socialize is at my college and it seems like every one I meet likes to go out and party.
    But I will try to look for groups or clubs that interest me and go from there.

    :)

    Hiking, biking clubs, club sports teams, etc.
  • plushkitten
    plushkitten Posts: 547 Member
    Yeah, find a new hobby. maybe join a gym? I go to the gym at the same time each morning and have made quite a few friends there who do the same. Maybe try playing a sport? Roller derby would be fun!

    I've joined a gym and so far I've just kept to myself but they do have some classes that they offer and I can try to socialize there. And yeaaaah roller derby does sound fun :)
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    The only place I go and socialize is at my college and it seems like every one I meet likes to go out and party.
    But I will try to look for groups or clubs that interest me and go from there.

    :)

    That's what you should do. You just need to meet people that are naturally fun and know how to have fun with life and have lots of interests. The options are endless. You don't need drugs and alcohol to have fun. And you can still go out dancing and have fun dancing.
  • VelociMama
    VelociMama Posts: 3,119 Member
    The only place I go and socialize is at my college and it seems like every one I meet likes to go out and party.
    But I will try to look for groups or clubs that interest me and go from there.

    :)

    Try something like meetup.com and look for people who are into active hobbies (running, biking, hiking, etc.).
  • kimmiedunne
    kimmiedunne Posts: 82 Member
    I agree - find a hobby to occupy your time and other friends to hang out with and do some "healthy" activities. I like cross stitching and those sort of things...they occupy my time and keep my hands busy so I don't go to the fridge or to grab a snack! :)
  • Drussander
    Drussander Posts: 266 Member
    you don't need to be drunk or stoned to be interesting.


    ^^ Exactly. You should be able to have fun without alcohol and other things. It may be that the people you hang out with are not that interesting when they are not drunk or high?

    Regardless, you don't have to quit everything. You can still have some beers, etc. with your friends on the weekends as long as you watch your total calorie intake for the day. It may take some discipline to stop going beyond a few beers (about 350 cals or so for three Heinekens), but you can do it.

    Other than that, why not enjoy engaging in stimulating conversation, go hear live music, hit the rec center and play some ping pong (instead of beer pong), take a Krav Maga or JuJitsu class, do some community service, play an MMO, take film criticism as a course and go see movies with a friend, etc. So much to do out there!
  • My husband and I went through the same thing after high school when we quick doing all that and our friends didn't want to hang out anymore bc we didnt want to participate in those activities. Eventually we met other people and made new friends. The friends I have made since have been more like soul friends and the relationships are so much better than the superficial socialite kind. Join a book club or take a dance/yoga class. Meet new people :)
  • buzzcogs
    buzzcogs Posts: 296 Member
    Find a club or a group of people who do things besides drink and smoke dope. There is a whole world out there! Read, bicycle, volunteer work, school, part time job, hobby that has a club, "fun" classes (dancing, pottery, sewing, car repair!) , church groups, etc.
    I bet you could think of a whole lot more. I'm sure your old friends are nice but if all they do is drink and smoke dope..they might be a little boring themselves! ;-)
    There is a lot out there! Go for it!
  • If you're in the US (not sure if it's an international thing or not), try meetup.com. It's a website where people form groups around specific goals/hobbies such as running, meeting new people, trying different sushi restaurants, singles mixers, board games, etc. and then meet up to do those activities. It's a great way to meet people with similar goals/interests.
  • castell5
    castell5 Posts: 234 Member
    Find a 5K near you and set your sights to do the run. Look at the www.vrbo.com website and pick a nice place to travel to. VRBO stands for vacation rental by owner. You can find a place you can afford anywhere in the world on that site. So use your weekends to ready yourself for the marathon you are going to be in, or the 5K, or the trip you are going to go on.
    Read books, take horseback riding lessons, winter is coming, if you can't ski, learn to ski. Meet upbeat positive healthy active fun people. Drop the "old crowd" let them waste away. Get on with your life and make it a healthy happy one. Turquoise water and palm trees are awful nice!
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    I quit weed last year, and getting off that had me depressed for months. I adjusted after about 12 weeks or so, but I just felt so isolated and hopeless for those first months after getting off the drugs. Exercise helps, but mostly you just have to get to the other side.
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
    When I decided to lose weight, I stopped drinking and smoking weed for obvious reasons (too high in calories, makes me lazy/tired, no motivation, etc) and now I have nothing to do on weekends and it seems like no one wants to hang out with me anymore. I understand that I have to be boring for a little if I want to make changes, but not being around people makes me isolated and depressed. I don't know what to fill my time with besides going out and exercising. Which is good, but that doesn't take 12 hours to do. Ugh, I don't want to be alone. What would you guys suggest I do to take my mind off of things and will fulfill my weekends?

    you don't need to be drunk or stoned to be interesting.

    in fact, as you get a little bit older, you'll realize that people who go through life drunk and/or stoned are losers and you shouldn't waste your time trying to be like them.

    there are lots of people out there who don't drink (or only drink occasionally and don't do drugs). in fact, that's most people. they lead fun, productive, happy lives. there's alot to do in life that doesn't revolve around recreational drug use.

    I am one of those people that rarely drinks and hasn't smoked weed since high school (however, I'm in my 40s). I certainly don't think I'm boring.

    I belong to several running groups, go to concerts, photograph a lot of local bands, go to movies, theater, go for walks with friends, etc.


    Find new friends. If there's nothing organized at your college, try Meetup.com--it has a zillion different groups around all different types of interests. You might even try looking on MFP for a group based in your geographic area (or start one if there isn't anything organized yet)
  • endlesoul
    endlesoul Posts: 98 Member
    There are great suggestions here also have you looked into any volunteering? Find a organization that you feel passionate about then check into it. When I did a lot of volunteer work I met great like minded people. There were a few that became friends but this is a way to get out there and do something rewarding and meet people at the same time.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
    I know how you feel because I've felt like that in the past. Over the years I've had a lot of different peer groups but one thread through them all was alcohol and drugs. the drugs part is an issue because its a bit of a deal breaker, its hard to go hang around with people after you decide to quit / have a break because usually stoners/party people spend a lot of time high as ****.

    I spent the last 5 years djing in london and other places and got quite accustomed to free drinks and mdma, cocaine, ketamine etc. my eating habits we're terrible and I also didnt sleep much because I had a full time job also.

    after all of that and a 15 year span of mild drug use and drinking to have fun, I really didn't know what to do other than that to have fun. it really does take time. i'm trying to meet people who share the same interests that I do, I'm going to cantonese classes to improve my cantonese, I go to a lot of movies and spend more time with my family.

    I don't really have any close friends (im in a new city) but its ok because I finally quit doing drugs, something I could never say before. it is hard to fill that space, and infact I felt like such a square at the beginning, I didnt know what people did for fun. infact im still learning. I go camping and hiking, photography.

    but yah, like a few people already said, you need to make some new friends. you're not alone, so do i :)
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Great suggestions already.

    Maybe I'm an old fuddy dud, but you know what I find really boring? People who are in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond who still boast about getting "like... sooooo wasted."

    You're not getting boring. You're growing up. That's a good thing. :flowerforyou:
  • writemusic4him
    writemusic4him Posts: 312 Member
    Volunteer for a local good cause
  • beckyboop712
    beckyboop712 Posts: 383 Member
    I'm not a super devout Christian but I did start hanging out at the Methodist student center in College because they had swing and salsa dance lessons and also community lunch once a week and a prayer breakfast (which I ultimately ran my third year being involved). You'd be amazed what kinds of fun you can have with that crowd. Movie nights, pot luck dinners,game nights, trips to other towns/cities to check out a restaurant or concert. There's no limit to what you can do! :-)
  • plushkitten
    plushkitten Posts: 547 Member
    Some great suggestions here.
    Thanks guys<3
  • WinnerVictorious
    WinnerVictorious Posts: 4,733 Member
    Great suggestions already.

    Maybe I'm an old fuddy dud, but you know what I find really boring? People who are in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond who still boast about getting "like... sooooo wasted."

    You're not getting boring. You're growing up. That's a good thing. :flowerforyou:

    most days, i'm down at the local post office around 4:30PM-5:00PM to check my PO Box and to mail things. on fridays, there is always a steady stream of middle-aged guys in pickup trucks, pulling into the liquor store next door to the post office.. going in and coming out holding a case of beer or whatever. it's obvious these people never outgrew high school. they are simply numbing themselves to life and before they know it, their life will be done and they will have missed out on actually living it. i just don't get it. if their lives are so miserable that they have to seek escape in a bottle, why don't they get up and make positive changes their lives? go after the root problem, so to speak.