Personality or Looks: What do you notice first?

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Replies

  • Driscman
    Driscman Posts: 1
    Both are important, but you'll never notice someone hot who hides their face and sits in the corner. An outgoing person will always get noticed first regardless of their looks.
  • dawn2313
    dawn2313 Posts: 125 Member
    Key word here is "first"

    Obviously you're gonna notice their looks first, you don't know what their full personality is like until you make an approach and somewhat get to know them. That being said, personality definitely trumps looks in my book- if there is a smokin' hot guy but he's acting like a *kitten*, he's the ugliest guy in the room. I don't care what anybody says about mean guys being sexy; guys who are genuinely nice and respectful are seexxyy.
  • Sarah_Wins
    Sarah_Wins Posts: 936 Member
    I LOVE the look of a great sense of humor. That's hot.
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
    Im not going to sit here and lie and say oh personality for sure.. because how do u really know someones personality from across the room... You notice there looks.. and then as soon as their mouth opens you will know if you like there personality. Its bull **** when people say i fall for personality first.. u really dont know someones personality until you truly get to know them..

    Actually you notice quite a bit. Whether they're out going or shy, whether he likes to laugh and tell jokes. If he's stand-offish.
    People's body language will allow you to assess how approachable someone is. Is the person he's talking to looking for the closest escape route? Does he give genuine hugs to the people he knows? Does he engage in close conversation and does he listen?

    Is he off to one side looking like he'd rather be home with his computer or afraid someone might approach him. Then there is the please rescue me i am so bored.

    Men, you have an advantage most of you don't realize. That guy everyone tries to escape? When she looks frantic and cornered, go save her! That will buy you at least 10 minutes if shehow's worth it. Are her eyes darting everywhere? Does she keep backing up and he keeps getting closer. Make up the goofiest thing to pull her out of there. She'll at least thank you and if you're not her type, she has friends. "hey, i heard your gramma is the cat lady and has some kitties that need a good home. My little sister has been looking for one, how about we discuss terms over at the punchbowl, you look thirsty" sure it's all a lie, but she either knows or doesn't care that you mistook her for someone else. If you look creepier than the guy she's talking to, you're out of luck.
  • fawndam
    fawndam Posts: 595 Member
    EYES!
  • RobinvdM
    RobinvdM Posts: 634 Member
    Obv looks first, its the first thing you notice on any encounter but the minute he (or she) opens their mouth it can make or break it for me. Id rather hang with an ugly guy who knew how to make me laugh when I a down than with a hawt looking piece of human garbage.

    I got lucky and got the good combo with my hubby ;-)
  • Luvmesumkenny
    Luvmesumkenny Posts: 779 Member
    Looks is an appetitizer. Personality is the main course.

    LUV IT!!!
  • Coffeeholic8
    Coffeeholic8 Posts: 272 Member
    Boobs!

    Hey, I'm a bloke, it's in our DNA so don't hate. :blushing: :flowerforyou:

    Unless you only ever spoken to them by email, text or telephone then it's always going to be looks that initially spark an interest. Personality then decides if that interest blooms or fades away.
  • Dub_D
    Dub_D Posts: 1,760 Member
    Personality. I have never been attracted to anyone without knowing their personality first.
  • katweeks63
    katweeks63 Posts: 59
    There's got to be some basic physical attraction there before you wonder about the personality... So imma say looks! If the personality is s..hite they ultimately become unattractive anyway IMO.

    I agree! When I was single, 23 years ago, I dated a lot of guys, good looking and not, but the personalities ran me off. I was fotunate to find a good looking man with a great personality. Now, 23 years later, the looks are still there, but not as amazingly as when we were 25, but the personality lives on. His laugh is the best!
  • Rhia55
    Rhia55 Posts: 247
    Looks, but if the looks don't grab me, I'll still wait to see what the personality is... it often improves the looks.
  • pullipgirl
    pullipgirl Posts: 767 Member
    The way they present themselves is what I notice first
  • peanutUK
    peanutUK Posts: 10 Member
    In all honesty, looks. Definitely. And I know you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, but more than half the time I think you can gauge personality by looks. So now after sounding a bit superficial, it's looks that attract but personality that makes you connect!!
  • trud72
    trud72 Posts: 1,912 Member
    Well,someones just gotta say it.... :devil:

    LOOKS and tape thier trap shut!! lol :noway: :devil:
  • capnwo85
    capnwo85 Posts: 1,103 Member
    Anyone who says personality is full of SH#$#$. You don't see that right away, you see a person's appearance. Physical attraction is part of our human nature. Also if personality mattered so much, no one would be on this website.
  • katweeks63
    katweeks63 Posts: 59
    Height. I'm 6ft 2 and finding a guy taller than me is like finding the Holy Grail.

    I know how you feel! I was 5'10" in my younger days, (have lost 2in since then) but I had the same problem. All the guys that were worth spending my time on were shorter than me, or just barely as tall. My best friend is 5'11" and her husband is shorter than me. Guess you just have to love them no matter how tall they are. Too bad my oldest son is taken, he would fit your bill, at 6'7".
  • Dinamita_TNT
    Dinamita_TNT Posts: 333
    The first thing I notice is the physical appearence (in order: face -smile and sight/eyes-, chest/back -I like guys that are strong/big-, neck, hands and shoes -yes, shoes! lol)

    But the fact is... That if you don't have nothing in your brian, you have nothing to do with me (if you want my sex, get my brain first ;D)
  • Artemis726
    Artemis726 Posts: 587 Member
    I've been married 12+ years, but honestly it was looks first for me. That's where the initial attraction came in, but very soon after the personality and connection came into play. I dated several guys who 'grew' on me because of their personalities, but I wasn't initially attracted to them. I also dated extremely attractive guys who lost a lot of points because they tried too damn hard to look good or their personalities were just blah. When I first met my husband, I thought he was attractive, but not my type. I was very drawn to his personality and intelligence, so he became even more attractive to me. :)
  • fawndam
    fawndam Posts: 595 Member
    Boobs!

    Hey, I'm a bloke, it's in our DNA so don't hate. :blushing: :flowerforyou:

    Unless you only ever spoken to them by email, text or telephone then it's always going to be looks that initially spark an interest. Personality then decides if that interest blooms or fades away.



    :flowerforyou: love your honesty!! (.)(.)
  • lowm8nance
    lowm8nance Posts: 30 Member
    The quick answer is, Looks. However, I've been in places where I notice someones personality first by their confidence, charisma, the way they draw people to them and have to admit, that's an super sexy trait in my eyes. If I saw that persons pic rather than met them and saw their demeanor, I may have passed on them right away.
    However, I also notice that the older you get, the farther down looks go on your priority list. The more experiences you have, the more you make a quality person to hang out with your goal rather than arm candy.
  • socko6774
    socko6774 Posts: 200
    well you cant see personality, so obviously thats what you notice first. anyone that says personality is full of crap lol.

    dont get me wrong, looks open the door, but a personality keeps you from walking back out of it.
  • Jimmytreatingtons
    Jimmytreatingtons Posts: 128 Member
    Normally it has to be looks, specially if you are out and about.

    Though that wasn't the case to the lady i married! We didn't like each other at school and we actually happened to work at the same place some 8 years after leaving school.

    After a few things happening in our lives we came together by chance and going out with a crowd for a few years!

    Personality it vitally important in a relationship for me.
  • fiberartist219
    fiberartist219 Posts: 1,865 Member
    I have to be honest, as I am losing weight, I notice more and more creepers that want to talk to me. I never go anywhere without my wedding ring, but I still occasionally get hit on. That never happened when I was chubby.

    I'm not going to pretend that looks don't matter, because I have turned guys down for being downright unattractive. I won't say they are ugly, because I think almost anyone can clean up nicely, but I just couldn't find a good reason. I just wasn't into him...

    However, I would NEVER talk to a guy, only because he is attractive to look at. I only approach someone if I have something to say about what they are doing, saying, etc.

    I love it that people find me nice to look at as I lose weight, but it annoys the *kitten* out of me that they can't find anything else about me to talk about. In addition to looking hot, I also have a career, hobbies, and a family life that I would like to receive recognition for. I'm so much more than a sack of flesh.

    So, what did I notice first about my husband? Well, I just noticed that he and his friends looked like a bunch of well to do suburban kids. (I was 19 when I met him...) and I hoped that I would fit into the group. As I heard him speak and saw him interacting with the rest of the group, I started to think he was really hot... and once I found out that he had high standards for everything he does, I had to ask him out.

    So, yes, I do notice looks, but that's not enough.
  • fiberartist219
    fiberartist219 Posts: 1,865 Member
    Anyone who says personality is full of SH#$#$. You don't see that right away, you see a person's appearance. Physical attraction is part of our human nature. Also if personality mattered so much, no one would be on this website.

    I am here not for my looks, but for my general health... just so you know.
  • kborton1122
    kborton1122 Posts: 914 Member
    Looks attract me first, since that is what I see before I get to know the personality. But if the personality isn't there, forget about it.
  • elprincipito
    elprincipito Posts: 1,200 Member
    her bank account
  • trud72
    trud72 Posts: 1,912 Member
    her bank account

    come to mama! :tongue:
  • plus_chocolate
    plus_chocolate Posts: 36
    Im not going to sit here and lie and say oh personality for sure.. because how do u really know someones personality from across the room... You notice there looks.. and then as soon as their mouth opens you will know if you like there personality. Its bull **** when people say i fall for personality first.. u really dont know someones personality until you truly get to know them..

    but personality does play a big part in being attracked to someone... In the end the looks are a bonus.. But i would say Looks then Personality for sure!

    Exactly I love a great personality and that is what I am attracted to the most but when speaking of what you notice first it has to be looks. Lets be honest you don't see someone from across the room and go oh yea look at that personality because you can't see it. You look and see a nice smile, nice eyes, ect. then you learn the personality that comes along with the package and decided if they are worth it.
  • Skinny_minny_mo
    Skinny_minny_mo Posts: 1,272 Member
    The quick answer is, Looks. However, I've been in places where I notice someones personality first by their confidence, charisma, the way they draw people to them and have to admit, that's an super sexy trait in my eyes. If I saw that persons pic rather than met them and saw their demeanor, I may have passed on them right away.
    However, I also notice that the older you get, the farther down looks go on your priority list. The more experiences you have, the more you make a quality person to hang out with your goal rather than arm candy.

    well said!
  • ShyFeather
    ShyFeather Posts: 138 Member
    I have to say I notice personality first. I'm very shy so I don't always make eye contact with people like I should. In fact, I went out with a guy the other day. I said yes to go with him because he seemed sort of quiet and laid back. But when I was going to our meeting spot I realized I couldn't remember what his face looked like XD Fail... epic fail...

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