I binged :(

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Keltinator
Keltinator Posts: 265
in Motivation and Support
I've been doing really well lately. My clothes have been getting looser and there's a big difference in my face.

Yesterday I just had the urge to binge. And I told myself, "Well, a couple cookies won't kill me." So I walked down to the supermarket looking for a pack of cookies.

I came back with a 12 pack of chocolate chip cookies and a tray of nanaimo bars! This is why I don't go shopping alone.

So I sat down and just... ate. I went through about half of the stuff I bought, then stopped to do some errands. Then last night I ate the rest before I went to sleep.

I ate until I felt sick. Why was I punishing myself like that? Why do I use food to make myself feel miserable?

And then I was so uncomfortable that I couldn't sleep last night. I woke up in the middle of the night feeling like I might throw up (I didn't), and then this morning my throat burned from the stomach acid. I felt so sick that I didn't make it to my classes this morning. Now it's almost noon and my body is exhausted.

I don't want to feel like this ever again. I need to remember how awful this feels and bring it to mind the next time I want to binge...

I know this is just a speed bump. Today I'm on the wagon. Still, I'm disgusted with myself!
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Replies

  • MissKalhan
    MissKalhan Posts: 2,282 Member
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    Unforunately it happens, just need to remind yourself that today is another day. I'm super bad when it comes to ice cream, when the urge hits me I can eat a full tub all by my lonesome.
    Hit the gym today and you'll feel better :)
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    I sucks. I binge every time I get my period, for about a week and don't realize why I'm doing it until my period comes. It's not what you did yesterday that counts, it's what you learned from it and how you handle it today that will determine your success.
  • drmerc
    drmerc Posts: 2,603 Member
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    dang now I want cookies
  • simplebeauty
    simplebeauty Posts: 22 Member
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    Don't be disgusted with yourself....I find that going overboard now and then is a reminder of what eating crap feels like....sometimes we get so euphoric from working out and feeling good....and crappy and nutrient void products are everywhere, it's a hard hard thing/habit to break!!

    At least you are back, and hopefully realized you don't want to feel that way (eating until you felt sick)....your body was used to all the nutrient dense foods, that it went into shock.....but it's not the end of the world!!

    :)
  • Rhia55
    Rhia55 Posts: 247
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    It's all right. I did yesterday too. At work I ate a chili dog and then when they bought us pizza I ate 4 bloody pieces, not to mention two candy bars and popcorn when I got home. It was bad, and I really felt terrible. I didn't even log it all.

    But that was yesterday. That was then. This is today, this is now, and I can undo the damage. So can you. Do an extra workout, take an extra long walk, cut one item out of your meal today. That's what I am doing.

    It does happen. It will happen. The key is not to let it happen EVERY DAY... and when it does happen, let it motivate you to try harder, not to give up. Don't give up!
  • sunnyside1213
    sunnyside1213 Posts: 1,205 Member
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    I am with friends in Dallas. They eat out three times a day and bought my favorite ice cream because they "love me". I will do the best I can until Friday, but this isn't going to be good. It happens. Remember, it's not a diet. It's a lifestyle.
  • RachelSRoach1
    RachelSRoach1 Posts: 435 Member
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    the sugar hangover... been there before! Isn't it neat that our bodies are getting so accustomed to healthy foods that too much sugar makes us sick? I have the urge to binge every once in a while.. but the memory of the sugar hangover stops me :D
  • MrsSullivan08
    MrsSullivan08 Posts: 274 Member
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    Don't worry. I have had several of these days and still have made awesome progress. Just keep picking yourself back up and don't give up. You can do it!
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
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    Pretty sure everyone has binged at some point and still lost weight. What matters more is the bigger picture - Your general habits overall. As long as you are able to overcome it, forgive yourself, and accept it, you'll be okay. Lots of people use food when they are bored or depressed or just feeling out of control. Maybe the feeling of being sick from cookies is something you can try to remember if you're feeling the desire to binge eat again?

    When I was losing weight, I knew that if I kept cookies in the house, I would eat all of them. So I kept my pantry free of "trigger foods" until I was in a better place to moderate myself. It made me so much more SANE because I wasn't resisting temptation all the time. Most people here will say "don't deny yourself! Just learn how to moderate!" but it's just not that easy for some of us who binge. Maybe, at this stage in your progress, you will have to completely avoid food that triggers a binge for you, and then tackle that problem later on. I was very successful with this technique and the weight has been gone for almost four years.

    Nanaimo bars RULE though.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    log it, and move on....
  • RachelSRoach1
    RachelSRoach1 Posts: 435 Member
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    dang now I want cookies

    made me lol
  • SenshiV
    SenshiV Posts: 131 Member
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    I don't see whats so bad in a binge one time or the other, it's really no big deal, specially if you know you have to eat alot and several days to start to gain weight back.

    I ate a "Gansito Marinela" yesterday with 8 ounces milk and to me is a , so what? I will not be a prisoner of loosing weight, I am in control so yeah, got my gansito, now let's get back to regular work as usual, and that's it.

    Cheer up, forget about it and when you do it, 'sometimes' not regularly, keep it real don't feel bad about it we all deserve something back for our efforts.

    By the way, I think my next will be what you had now I want some, maybe next week or later ^^.
  • meganbook
    meganbook Posts: 71
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    Don't beat yourself up about it. I binged this weekend too. I usually do pretty good with holding back, but my biggest downfall is alcohol. Once I get a few drinks in me and I'm hungry, my inner fat girl runs rampant. I came home from the bar and started off good with carrots, but that quickly escalated to pizza and candy. I felt like crap the next day.

    If you feel a binge coming on, remind yourself how it made you feel. Look at pictures of your before you lost weight. Let that be an inspiration to not binge in the future. You are doing so well!

    Put it behind you, there is nothing you can do about it now except learn from it. Put a little extra time at the gym/take the stairs/do a little extra this week to make up for it and keep looking forward!
  • Karhyn
    Karhyn Posts: 18 Member
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    Sometimes we need this to stay focussed after! Just remember that episode next time you feel like eating crap again! I wrote myself a little story that I read whenever I feel like having crapy food. It helps.

    Hope you feel better soon :)
  • AZKristi
    AZKristi Posts: 1,801 Member
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    Hang in there - this has happened to so many of us so you are not alone. Just use the bad feelings to propel you back into healthy eating today. Luckily, one day of poor choices is unlikely to have any long term effect. Just make sure to do better today.
  • Brunner26_2
    Brunner26_2 Posts: 1,152
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    I prefer google.
  • DrMAvDPhD
    DrMAvDPhD Posts: 2,097 Member
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    Don't be too hard on yourself. And next time you want cookies, buy a smaller package so you can eat them all, fill the craving, and not have more to "finish off" later.
  • GiddyupTim
    GiddyupTim Posts: 2,819 Member
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    stuff happens. It is a setback, not a defeat.
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
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    Pretty sure everyone has binged at some point and still lost weight. What matters more is the bigger picture - Your general habits overall. As long as you are able to overcome it, forgive yourself, and accept it, you'll be okay. Lots of people use food when they are bored or depressed or just feeling out of control. Maybe the feeling of being sick from cookies is something you can try to remember if you're feeling the desire to binge eat again?

    When I was losing weight, I knew that if I kept cookies in the house, I would eat all of them. So I kept my pantry free of "trigger foods" until I was in a better place to moderate myself. It made me so much more SANE because I wasn't resisting temptation all the time. Most people here will say "don't deny yourself! Just learn how to moderate!" but it's just not that easy for some of us who binge. Maybe, at this stage in your progress, you will have to completely avoid food that triggers a binge for you, and then tackle that problem later on. I was very successful with this technique and the weight has been gone for almost four years.

    Nanaimo bars RULE though.

    Good advice. I have found that if I keep a whole package of oreos in the house, I can easily eat them all in one day (yikes!). So if I want cookies, I go to the convenience store and get a pack of two cookies. Then I don't feel at all bad for having cookies, and I can control how much I eat.
  • fattypattybinger
    fattypattybinger Posts: 337
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    Oh how I can relate to this one. I was a in the closet binger. I would wait for everybody to go to bed or leave the house and I would binge on anything I could get my hands on. I would eat almost to the point of throwing up. One time I almost wanted to force my self to purge then I realized this was going to lead me into a full bull ED. It is sad when the kids leave for school and say Mommy please don't eat all the Dorito's Mommy please don't eat my Ice Cream. I thought if each kid picked out the snacks it would stop me from eating it that didn't work. The time I ate the Ben and Jerry's my daughter picked out and I ate it all she started to cry. That was enough to make me fight. I definately feel at times the food is winning but with my strength each day it does get better. I would love to support you. Two weeks ago I was going to change my name just to Fatty Patty but the binger is still trying to hang around.

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