"body dysmorphia"?

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  • shorty35565
    shorty35565 Posts: 1,425 Member
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    I feel the EXACT same way as you. I do the exact same things you do. I constantly pick myself apart and I feel like a fat cow.
    My BMI is 20.5. 5'4.75 and 122.8lbs.
    I hate myself & struggle with this almost every day. I wish I knew how to help you, but I don't. But know you're not alone.
  • dabrion
    dabrion Posts: 9 Member
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    I think this is something that affects mostly females. I mean honestly you hear this alot and you all really look fine or at the very least no where near as bad as you describe. From a guy's perspective, we can take a look at ourselves and think there is always something to improve on. No matter what point we get to or how many compliments we get. But you females take it to another level. I have always found it strange how most beautiful women always are SUPER hard on themselves, while the women that could use a little work are the most confident.....
  • bonbonsgone
    bonbonsgone Posts: 2
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    from girl to girl, i can honestly say i completely know the feeling. i'm 21 in the military, and i'm told i have a "hot" body. but when i was a freshamn in high school, i had hit 201 on the scale at 5'3, and the belittling and mocking and ridicule was apart of an every routine in my life as well. i'm athletic now and i've lost 50-60 lbs since then (it varies lol) but it's a little normal to have those residual thoughts. i don't think we should dwell on them though, which is something i'm working on myself, because we did overcome, and while it's hard and we're trying to still push forward, the most important thing is how far we have already come, and that we did it for ourselves and nobody else! there has to be that point when you look in the mirror though, and realize that those "flaws" we see aren't flaws at all, and just who we are. be thankful for those "ugly duckling yrs" as i call them. thats when we developed our awesome personalities to go along with our new hot bodies! lol you're a hit hun, and you're perfeclty fine for having that insecure day. everyone does :)
  • JBennis1013
    JBennis1013 Posts: 377 Member
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    I haven't hit my goal weight, but I think that when I do I will still see myself as the fat girl. Even back when I was skinny, I didn't think I was...Just something we'll have to work through.
  • sarahisme18
    sarahisme18 Posts: 574 Member
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    Can totally relate to this. It is hard for your mind to catch up with your body. Ultimately, you have to work just as hard at losing weight and gaining strength to find peace of mind about your physical self. Hope you can find some encouragement and have more of those prancing in front of the mirror days! :)
  • mommyrox05
    mommyrox05 Posts: 238
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    I am totally the same....I was never the "Big girl" growing up, but I was always the tall girl, after having 5 kids over 13 years, and never loosing the weight I became the "Big girl" 5'8.5" and 210 at my heaviest (198 when I started my weight loss journey) I have now lost 70-73 lbs ( I fluxuate a little) but even though I have lost the weight....I still see myself in a much larger body. I am constantly crateeking(sp?) myeslf and see every little improfection there is to see with my body that family and frinds think that I am being rediculous about, and cannot see. Hang in there lady...
  • Sammijo24
    Sammijo24 Posts: 74 Member
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    I know exactly what youre talking about some days I just feel grossed out with myself and feel like I still look the same as I did 70lbs ago. Other days I prance around and feel like I look pretty great even though I have another 50lbs to lose. One of my best guy friends is the hot guy that evey girl goes after. He lost about 60lbs a few years ago and still doesn't like anyone touching his sides, sometimes has low self esteem and acts like he's still big. I'm afraid that's going to be me but I've realized going through old pictures and talking to other people help. I really think this is something everyone goes through at some point.
  • MemphisKitten
    MemphisKitten Posts: 878 Member
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    I totally have body dysmorphia!! I think it's because when I was just starting to go through puberty, my mother always made horrible comments about what I looked like (later I found out it was because she was jealous), but that set me up for a lifetime of hating the way I look. So I understand what you are feeling. My best friend has the worst body image of anyone I have ever known though. I think we are always comparing ourselves to media images of women and what we think "perfect" is too. My five year old made a comment the other day about how her thighs were fat and I couldn't believe it, cuz she is stick thin!! There is something Tyra Banks said to do that is helpful: Once a month, look at yourself naked in front of a full-length mirror, and pick out ONE thing that you like about your body (even if it is your toes). Then, every day, say out loud, "I have pretty (say body part here)." Every month, add to the list and this is supposed to help you overcome your body issues. :flowerforyou:
  • THINk_kkaybbyx0
    THINk_kkaybbyx0 Posts: 89
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    feel free to add me! im always here for support and encouragement!

    i know what you mean with this topic

    you're gorgeous though!
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
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    A lot of it has to do with changing the way you think. It's hard and takes time and determination, but it can be done. For example,whenever you catch yourself picking yourself to pieces, force yourself to think about something else, like the weather, or, even better, tell yourself good things about yourself. Tell youself that you look great, that you are a healthy weight, that you are healthy. If you do this long enough, over time, you can honestly change what and how you think about yourself. It can be done!
  • kdeaux1959
    kdeaux1959 Posts: 2,675 Member
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    Bullying has such negative impacts on peoples' lives. Yes, if this profile pic is current, you have done a great job. If you want to do anything a this point, I would think it would be to lift heavy and forget the scales for a while... Eat plenty of protein and tone up what you have. Above all, it does take an adjustment in your thinking to begin to see yourself as who you now are, rather than who you were... If these thoughts begin to become pervasive and cause some level of limitation in your life, you may want to seek counseling to overcome them; however, if they are not limiting to you then continue to work out and create the you that you will feel most comfortable with. The hardest person to forgive is yourself- this is because you can never get away from yourself... you are always there... you remember what was and the pain of hearing those cruel voices in your head from your past are hard to overcome.... But you have done a wonderful job and I encourage you to continue to do what has gotten these results for you, continue to tone up and begin to see yourself as you are rather than who you were.. and more importantly who OTHERS thought you were (whether you were or not)... Best wishes on a life free from your past.
  • Verity1111
    Verity1111 Posts: 3,309 Member
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    I deal with the same exact thing. I'm 5"8' 132. I still see myself at 200. People don't always understand. They think you look great, and you should think you do too. So why don't you? It's HARD not to still see that person. I still do some days. You just have to continue to fight it.
    Fight it everyday.

    girls are crazy, your beautiful and absolutely ridiculously crazy for thinking otherwise!

    Girls are crazy lol, guys can have body dysmorphia too. It just tends to be in the "I'm too skinny/not buff enough" realm. And I gotta say, there is a reason that girls may be more insecure about their bodies. Girls get a lot more pressure to be pretty/sexy/fit than guys from society as a whole

    True and not true. My husband was once 300lbs and he feels like he is huge now. I know he can't stand the idea of being big and actually cried and told me to never let him get that way again because he was ridiculed his entire life. We had him down to about 175 at one point (he is only 5'7") and he looked very thin because he has a large frame/curves. Well, he still felt like he was large. Now he is about 190/200, just a little over weight, but he feels disgusting and self conscious now too. I used to feel that way, but when I gained weight I missed what I had, looked back and pictures and realized how distorted our minds can be sometimes. This time, as I have started to lose weight I appreciated the difference and healthy improvements I saw.
  • paprikas
    paprikas Posts: 118 Member
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    I can relate to so much of this thread. Even though I have lost 30 lb and have totally changed my body shape, I somehow keep telling myself that "I was skinny until yesterday, but today I messed it up". My mind has not caught up with my body. I am so scared of sabotaging myself and living up to my fat expectations. I have been subconsciously messing up lately and am worried that I will regain the weight. I cannot let this happen.

    My strategy to take control:

    I will have to take this day by day and focus on staying at my goal calories on a daily basis.
    I will go shopping and will try on all the small sizes that my mind tells me will never fit!!!
    I will take some time to relax and visualize myself as a thin person who deserves to be thin
    I will be kind to myself and allow my mind to catch up...

    any other advice would be very welcome.
  • gypy
    gypy Posts: 83 Member
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    No matter the Weight I put on, having to buy new clothes. I can never see my gains in the mirror. I'm sure it's not healthy.. lol

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