Lunk Rant

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jefedesalto
jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
1. If you have to scream, grunt, and throw the 110 lb dumbbells on the floor at the end of your set, then you probably shouldn't be lifting as heavy as you are.
2. I get it dude, you have a massive chest, back, and arms but you have the legs of a 9 year old girl. Douche!
3. The mirrors in the gym are for watching your form, I throw up in my mouth a little each time I see you flexing in them.
4. Do you really think chicks find Bacne and back hair attractive? Maybe cut down your juice a little.
5. Hey brah, yes I was using that bench. Wait your F***ing turn.
6. This is a fitness club, if you want to see how heavy you can lift, Gold's is right down the street.
7. Hey bud, I know you are HUUUGE, but the sign that says "please re-rack weights" applies to you too.
8. Only think worse than a lunk is a poser lunk. He is that guy that thinks he is "buff" but actually just has strategically placed fat.
9. Pretty sure the girls in the gym get creeped out when you stare at them like a rapist just released from prison.

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Please post your biggest LUNK complaints.
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Replies

  • Bakkasan
    Bakkasan Posts: 1,027 Member
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    I love this one. Chicken legs are hot.
    2. I get it dude, you have a massive chest, back, and arms but you have the legs of a 9 year old girl. Douche!

    And #8 is so totally me! Sucks but true.
  • poeco76
    poeco76 Posts: 139 Member
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    I don't mind lunks, actually. I think they're a great source of entertainment. Perhaps it's just that I'm a female, but I can't help but laugh when I see these guys. Thankfully, my current gym doesn't have many, but I kind of miss the entertainment they have provided in the past.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    Quit talking about me!

    In all seriousness I set off the lunk alarm more than once before I decided it was a challenge to see if I could set if off. Then I picked a better gym.
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
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    Quit talking about me!

    In all seriousness I set off the lunk alarm more than once before I decided it was a challenge to see if I could set if off. Then I picked a better gym.

    LOL, I get it, I work out at Schula's health spa in Miami and am one of the bigger guys there. I'm only 190, but on Saturdays it gets stupid with these guys in my gym.
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
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    I love this one. Chicken legs are hot.
    2. I get it dude, you have a massive chest, back, and arms but you have the legs of a 9 year old girl. Douche!

    And #8 is so totally me! Sucks but true.

    HAHA, Didn't mean to offend. you have to act lunkish too.
  • Bakkasan
    Bakkasan Posts: 1,027 Member
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    Oh haha I only meant the strategic fat. Still got 45-50 to go but I have back to having too much fun building muscle again. Totally none taken!
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    Obviously I'm not one of the "bigger guys" seeing as how I'm female, but I like some of the nicer meat heads at my gym. Some can disappear simply because I don't want to see the injuries they will cause themselves one of these days.
  • FullOfWin
    FullOfWin Posts: 1,414 Member
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    I hate it when people call serious lifters who have spent tons of time lifting and gotten a ton of results and gotten strong as fck lunks.
  • Dancerten
    Dancerten Posts: 237 Member
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    7. Hey bud, I know you are HUUUGE, but the sign that says "please re-rack weights" applies to you too.


    This one :grumble: I don't want to be worn out from re-racking your six 45lb plates before I can even start my workout. It's common courtesy :angry:
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
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    I hate it when people call serious lifters who have spent tons of time lifting and gotten a ton of results and gotten strong as fck lunks.

    Do you act like a douche? I.e. not reracking, throwing weight on the floor? You can be swoll just don't be a **** about it. I'm not trying to offend anyone. Well.... Except for lunks.
  • gbbhey
    gbbhey Posts: 188
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    I'd like to add:

    "I won't wipe down anything, you will be lucky to sit on the same bench as me. And if you get a ringworm, it will be a blessing since it's from my amazing muscles and sexy *kitten*."

    "I know others are waiting on this bench, but I haven't talked for a good 15 minutes to my good friend Jimbo in at least two hours!"

    And as far as #9 goes, I always think of Will Ferrell doing pushups in Anchorman. "998...999....1000! Oh sorry I was doing pushups. I don't know if you heard, I just did 1000 of them!"
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
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    I'd like to add:

    "I won't wipe down anything, you will be lucky to sit on the same bench as me. And if you get a ringworm, it will be a blessing since it's from my amazing muscles and sexy *kitten*."

    "I know others are waiting on this bench, but I haven't talked for a good 15 minutes to my good friend Jimbo in at least two hours!"

    And as far as #9 goes, I always think of Will Ferrell doing pushups in Anchorman. "998...999....1000! Oh sorry I was doing pushups. I don't know if you heard, I just did 1000 of them!"


    I love it!!!!!
  • FullOfWin
    FullOfWin Posts: 1,414 Member
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    I hate it when people call serious lifters who have spent tons of time lifting and gotten a ton of results and gotten strong as fck lunks.

    Do you act like a douche? I.e. not reracking, throwing weight on the floor? You can be swoll just don't be a **** about it. I'm not trying to offend anyone. Well.... Except for lunks.

    I'm not really a lunk. I do rack weights. I don't drop DBs in the floor really, but when I deadlift so far up to 5x335 lbs, or do power cleans, or drop the bar after overhead presses, while I do control it on the way down a little, it still hits the floor pretty fckin hard and loud.
  • FullOfWin
    FullOfWin Posts: 1,414 Member
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    Actually IIRC Will Farrel was doing concentration curls ;)
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
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    Actually IIRC Will Farrel was doing concentration curls ;)

    I totally get you. You know the guys I mean. When they finish they throw the DBS into the cardio section while yelling "gggggggaaaaaaaaaa!" and it sounds like an earthquake.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    Please come tell me to my face not to drop my barbell at the end of a deadlift PR. Please.
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
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    Please come tell me to my face not to drop my barbell at the end of a deadlift PR. Please.

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  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    545559_10152423519610107_1222406805_n.jpg

    ive just been dying to use this meme though. i cant actually get mad.
  • kiachu
    kiachu Posts: 409 Member
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    1. I sometimes drop the weight for the same reason I have to kick them up. Momentum to get them into and out of position for the push. Sometimes it pure exhaustion from the force of the push.

    Actually if the weight is heavy enough to overload the targeted muscle group but is to heavy say to be supported by the smaller groups and joints it's safer to drop it than try a controlled descent, especially if the muscles have been depleted.

    2. I hate hate hate deloading reracking weights for other people but I look at it as extra exercise. It doesnt really take that long.

    3. Grunting, moaning, and breathing loud and other vocal exertions help with push, see childbirth.

    4. Want to scream at the chicken leggers. "Do a damn squat once in a while!!"

    honestly though the most people I see doing this are not the "lunks" its the dudes that are not that big or strong, yet suffering from egotism. They load up the damn leg press with 8 plates, do these half *kitten* reps screaming about it and then walk away to go do something else with bad form and too much weight.
  • Yanicka1
    Yanicka1 Posts: 4,564 Member
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    If I can lift more than you do, stop grunting.

    Once at my gym, a guy was doing deadlifts with horrible form and grunting like a moron for 135 pounds. When he was finished I ask if I could use his bar and weights, added a few pounds and proceded with my deadlifts.

    It was glorious

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