Before You Weigh In...

124

Replies

  • j1wright
    j1wright Posts: 286 Member
    Weigh your breasts separtely (plop them on the scale alone). Then weigh yourself and deduct the amount your breast weigh. Afterall, the breast weight doesn't count and should be in your favor. :wink:
  • bikinibeliever
    bikinibeliever Posts: 832 Member
    Go have a good cry-those tear ducts can hold tons of water weight! :laugh:
  • VanessaHeartsMasr
    VanessaHeartsMasr Posts: 727
    OMG, I'm dying, can't...breathe. I have to add, I weighed myself last week, farted, then weighed again just for sh**s and giggles, and it went down a pound. True story. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • VanessaHeartsMasr
    VanessaHeartsMasr Posts: 727
    Weigh your breasts separtely (plop them on the scale alone). Then weigh yourself and deduct the amount your breast weigh. Afterall, the breast weight doesn't count and should be in your favor. :wink:

    I like this!! While we're at it, weigh your head separately, and deduct at least 75% of that weight for your brain. Your brain shouldn't count either.
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    OMG, I'm dying, can't...breathe. I have to add, I weighed myself last week, farted, then weighed again just for sh**s and giggles, and it went down a pound. True story. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    I LOL'ed!!!! That's great!!!
  • SexyTmar
    SexyTmar Posts: 23 Member
    When I first started MFP we had a rickety old scale that had to be dialed in to zero before starting every time! I had no experience and of course did not go looking for tips, so I just jumped on the scale with all my clothes on. My second weigh in was using my sister's digital scale at her place, but still fully clothed.

    Now I am starting week four and just got a digital scale. When I weighed in today, I was only wearing my socks, bra and Tshirt. Not sure how much they weigh, but my total loss came in over four pounds!

    Next weigh-in, I will go for naked, but this will make me a little sad because that will be the end of my 'easy' weight loss! lol
  • KeriW626
    KeriW626 Posts: 430
    I was gonna say blow your nose, there is so much in those sinus cavity's. but someone said it before me. So hubby says, make sure all your toes are cleaned out, as toe jam really weighs you down. I lost 180 lbs in one day via divorce. Then I lost 40 lbs off my body my 1st semester in collage, and more by the time I graduated. FYI, they put all your class's at opposite ends of the campus, never near each other. lol So go to College.
  • lachesissss
    lachesissss Posts: 1,298 Member
    Exhale. 3 Liters of air has to weigh something.
  • tageekly
    tageekly Posts: 3,755 Member
    The brilliance of this thread - it's brilliant!

    And now I know all I must do to finally get that scale to move! :bigsmile:
  • RychelleD
    RychelleD Posts: 103 Member
    Lol!
  • anaboneana
    anaboneana Posts: 195 Member
    Talk to the scale, build a rapport. Love it, and squeeze it, and call his name George... Or Pedro if you are Hispanic like me.

    Ha. I named my scale. I don't so much hug it.. But I clean it a lot. Almost religiously. (Since it tends to get dust bunnies/dirt trapped on the little rubber feet that keep it from sliding on my tile)
  • Maccbow
    Maccbow Posts: 53 Member
    :laugh: EXFOLIATE!!! (Don't want dead skin cells draggin' ya down!!) :noway:
  • TinaBaily
    TinaBaily Posts: 792 Member
    Donate a kidney for a one-shot weight loss help. It helps your loss along and helps someone else. We only need one kidney to live, after all.

    I vote for holding one's breath. Air doesn't weigh anything, right?
  • Maccbow
    Maccbow Posts: 53 Member
    LOL!!! LOL!!! LOL!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • likepepsicola
    likepepsicola Posts: 117 Member
    SHAVE YOUR ARM HAIR!!! Those few extra strands really count.
  • Songbird1104
    Songbird1104 Posts: 210 Member
    My friend lost 180lbs by getting a divorce.

    :laugh: Hilarious!
  • enigmachik
    enigmachik Posts: 150
    Have your tonsils, adenoids, and wisdom teeth removed.
  • HMToomey
    HMToomey Posts: 276
    Donate a kidney... That's like, a quarter pound, right there! Plus you are really helping someone out a lot! :flowerforyou:
  • SellyBunnie
    SellyBunnie Posts: 34
    Remove the lint from your belly button!
  • CkepiJinx
    CkepiJinx Posts: 613 Member
    Fantastic
    :drinker: :wink: :happy: :laugh: :devil: :bigsmile:
  • norcal_yogi
    norcal_yogi Posts: 675 Member
    shave...
  • aippolito1
    aippolito1 Posts: 4,894 Member
    Pop all your pimples so there is no pus adding to your total!
  • SHDenver
    SHDenver Posts: 87 Member
    Is there scientific evidence that you need both arms? Probably. Other than that it seems like the US could collectively lose some of our ego. That fills fat cells quick. I saw it on Dr. Oz so you know it's the truth.
  • jerbear1962
    jerbear1962 Posts: 1,157 Member
    OK I followed those first rules for getting on the scale and was arrested immediately... evidently it's illegal to strip at a Walgreens before getting on the scale...hmmmm thanks now I have to go to court...
  • kaydow
    kaydow Posts: 4
    Don't even think about wearing any make-up when you get onto that scale! You might as well not even bother with weighing yourself if you don't wash off your face first. Oh, and if you have a fuzzy towel, make sure to pick off all of the fuzzies on your face left over from drying your face. While you're at it, your hair weighs a lot, you can either cut it all off or just shave it off. Plus, you don't really need all of your limbs. If a leg or two goes mysteriously missing all the better for your weight!
  • nathan6878
    nathan6878 Posts: 115 Member
    Get a great workout in and then strip as much clothing off as possible!!!
  • leejayem
    leejayem Posts: 120 Member
    Put the baby down...he's a chubba - at almost 2 he weighs close to 20kg!! He also comes in very handy for weightlifting...

    But if I REALLY want to fake it & make myself feel good (for 2 seconds) I an adjust the scale so that it starts under zero. That way, I can weight whatever I want!!:drinker:
  • sparkie51
    sparkie51 Posts: 98 Member
    lol i needed this in nj tonight
  • fleur_de_lis19
    fleur_de_lis19 Posts: 926 Member
    Make sure you pee/poop for God's sake!!! hahahh

    Number one rule... mmkay..thanks!
  • yogeshsarkar
    yogeshsarkar Posts: 119 Member
    lol, good tips here. Man I could have lost a lot more, had I followed this before my latest weigh in.

Categories