I am pathetic

Start with forgiving yourself and NEVER calling yourself names like "pathetic" again!!! Life happens, especially when you are in college. You are not pathetic....you are normal. It will come to you. In the mean time, try not to criticize yourself. It will only make you feel helpless and undermine your goals.

As amazing as it sounds, i have found that eating healthy is actually cheaper.

When filling up on convenience foods we are getting "empty" calories, and get hungry again faster. I found when i was eating mostly veggies, fruits, meat...and carbs in moderation my grocery bill was cheaper. I fyou can get yourself to change the thoughts running through your head, you will find the opposite is actually true.

Anything bought that is readymade is bad for you and filled with fat. On that same token, however, on the financial side you are comparing apples to oranges. Healthy stuff at the market, compared to unhealthy stuff at the market, is more expensive. Things that come in a can or a box generally cost less. But, of course, if you eat out every day, you spend more because of the cost that the producer spend making the food. I just wanted to clarify what you meant and what she is clarifying by "more expensive." Both of you, however, are right in your messages!

I have been on this website for too long to have absolutely nothing to show for it. All I need to lose is 30lbs and I can't do it.. I get really into it and then something get in the way. Here are the different reasons why I get sidetracked:

"I can't afford to buy healthy food."
"I have a meal plan... its hard to keep track of the food they have."
"I never see any results."
"I don't have time to go to the gym."
etc. etc. etc.

The list can go on forever. I have no self esteem and I NEED to find a way to change things. I NEED to be more motivated. I am so ashamed of myself and I really don't know how to get past this terrible place I am in...

I'm 5'1 and since I started college I have avoided the scale... but I would assume I am up to 155-160 When I am really on track I eat 1200 calories a day and work out 3x per week. The results are almost non existent. When I was trying my hardest, I never was able to get below 145, and that was after being in the hospital for three days...

please help me

I'm 5'1" and I've been there. Worse than that. I floundered for 15 years. I never achieved my goal until I was 50. I'm almost 52. I lost a lot of years following a lot of crap and yo-yo'd from one diet to the next. I ran marathon after marathon and worked my butt off at the gym lifting heavy weights for over 30 years, martial arts for 10 years, yet the weight kept creeping up. It's because I'm so small and don't need as much food as everyone around me. It didn't seem like I ate too much. I didn't binge, pig out, emotionally eat, or eat junk food. I ate healthy all my life.

I'm older but this is what finally worked for me once and for all. I hope at least once piece of it helps you.

There is no mystery to weight loss, everyone thinks something is wrong, their metabolism is broken, they have low thyroid, they have menopause or whatever issue, they are as unique as a snowflake, whatever. I thought a lot of these things once too but once the doctor helped resolve the health issues for me I learned there is still no magic pill. Most people eat more than they need to and are not at good at estimating calories as they think they are. Most people have a lower BMR than they think they do. The only way to know for sure is to go to a lab and have it tested. It doesn't seem fair to have to eat less and feel a little hunger. It's hard to face the truth of it, very hard. It's not fun. It's drudgery at times. But if you learn to enjoy your smaller amounts of food (necessary to lose weight, since the reason we got fat in the first place was eating too much whether we knew it or not), and rejoice in your victories it can be done.

All I can do is share what worked for me. I achieved my goal at age 50 after beating my head against the wall for 15 years. Yeah anyone can do it, but I can tell you that you are up against a lot when you are older and I believe females have some unique issue to face with hormones and such. The sooner you can get a handle on it the better. DO NOT GIVE UP. As I got older and the weight piled on (and I didn't feel I was eating too much!) everyone kept telling me to give up, this is what happens when you get older. I'm small, and I didn't realize how small I was until I lost the weight. Everyone said I had big bones. I looked hefty because I worked out. Once I lost the weight I realized how small I really was and that small people don't need to eat as much as big people. HINT: If you are short you are probably small.

Your body loses weight in chunks, not linear. I have found that you can do everything right and your weight loss seems to plateau but if you are patient and keep exercising and eating at a deficit (however slight) you will lose it, it will suddenly "whoosh". There are so many variables for the scale; water retention, digestion, hormones, allergies, sodium, carbs, water intake, DOMS, inflammation, the list goes on. People mistakenly think they lose or gain weight when they eat more or less because of these fluctuations.

Losing weight requires tremendous patience. You will not lose it when you want it or where you want it. The body does its thing. Some apparent plateaus can last a month or so. You cannot make it happen faster. You must focus on two things; calories and exercise. Nothing else matters. Scales and metrics don't matter. The day in and day out grind of exercise and calories are all that matters. It is not very exciting until things fall into place. You get your victories and you ride one victory to the next.

The scale is a trend tool. The scale is good but put it away and only check once a week and only use it as a trend tool. It will fluctuate, it does not matter. Take front side and back progress pictures at least once a month. You will see differences that the metrics won't tell you and it's that little bit of NSV that will keep you going until the next victory.

To say eat more is wrong.

To say eat less is wrong.

To find the exact calories needed for YOU to be in a healthy sustainable calorie deficit is the right answer. Wait, if you need to adjust by 100 do it, wait, adjust, wait, adjust, wait. The tortoise wins this race.

All that matters is calories. A healthy balanced diet within a calorie budget for a deficit that is right for YOU is all that matters for weight loss. Don't make it complicated.


Also people play mental accounting games with calories just like with finances. Make steps to make sure you are making accurate measurements. Packaged foods can have MORE than they say but not less (they get in trouble if less so they would rather error with MORE).

If you typically intake sodium at a certain rate your body adjusts, but if you make a sudden change then you will see a spike.

Exercise is for making your lean body mass pretty (especially lifting weights) for when the fat is gone. Losing fat with no muscle is ugly and cardio alone will not make you pretty. You cannot out exercise too many calories.

It really is about calories. I tell people this all the time and they say "Well if calories are all that matter why do you eat so clean???!!" Well, because it makes me feel better, sleep better, and perform better at my sports.

Too many changes at once can be hard on some people. I've always eaten healthy so it easy for me to simply eat less. Eating at a calorie deficit is hard on people; even a small deficit puts your body in a state of flux with hormones and such. Everyone is different. Some people can handle a deeper calorie deficit than others, this is not right or wrong, it just is. Stress in your life affects your hunger hormones; lack of sleep, fatigue, job stress, family stress, financial stress, etc. Add in emotional eating issues and it gets even more complicated. Most people can only handle so much change/stress at once, they try to do too much and fail. Sometimes it might be a better strategy to eat at maintenance and make some small changes first, it really depends on how much stress you are taking in at the moment.

What is the exact number of calories for you?

We’ve been trying to figure out an exact NUMBER of calories that everyone should be eating, without recognizing that everyone is slightly different. In truth, the calories aren’t the end game. Your body is. So the EXACT amount of Calories that are right for you is the EXACT amount that will allow you to maintain your ideal bodyweight no matter what some calculator or chart says.

In other words, an online calculator might tell you that you need to eat 2,500 calories
per day to maintain your ideal bodyweight. But the only way to know for sure if this is
the right amount for you is to test it out. If you gain weight or can’t lose weight eating
that much, then you know you need to eat less to lose weight no matter how many
calculators and text books say otherwise.

This doesn’t mean your metabolism is broken, it just means the estimate of your needs
was just a bit off.

-John Barban (The Body Centric Calorie Guide from the Venus Index and Adonis Index Manuals)

The good thing is you don't have to worry about the starvation mode myth if you are fat. Only skinny people have to worry about starvation mode. It does not mean you have the capability to eat at a large calorie deficit if you have emotional eating disorders or other issues going on, but at least you don't have to be afraid of it anymore.

The Theory of Fat Availability:
•There is a set amount of fat that can be released from a fat cell.
•The more fat you have, the more fat can be used as a fuel when dieting.
•The less fat you have, the less fat can be used as a fuel when dieting.
•Towards the end of a transformation, when body fat is extremely low you
may not have enough fat to handle a large caloric deficit anymore.

At the extreme low end, when your body fat cannot ‘keep up’ with the energy deficit
you've imposed on your body, the energy MUST come from SOMEWHERE. This is
when you are at risk of losing lean body mass during dieting (commonly referred to
as ‘starvation mode’). This happens at extremely low levels of body fat, under 6% in
men and 12% in women [Friedl K.E. J Appl Phsiol, 1994].

-Brad Pilon and John Barban (from The Reverse Taper Diet in The Adonis Index and Venus Index manuals)

Lifting weights is KEY. I recently had my DXA scan done and at 51.5 years of age I have the bone density of a super athletic 30 year old. That is a direct result of lifting for over 30 years. Now if that is not scientific proof that lifting weights keeps you younger I don't know what is! Also I believe it is why most people think I look much younger than I really am.

Start lifting now, lift heavy and change it up often, find a lot of weight routines with free weights, make it fun, embrace it, make it part of your life. Only 3 days a week is all it would take. Crank up your tunes and learn to love it, because your body will love it and it will make your quality of life better in many ways, especially when you get older like me.

Because of this I don't have to worry about osteoporosis. If you wait until you are older and your bones start to deteriorate it's a bit too late, you can't get back what you lost, and you can only start a resistance routine that will prevent further damage.

If you are female you don't have the hormones to get big naturally. I lift heavy and I'm still really tiny. My lean body mass is only 104 lbs and that is fairly heavy for a 5'1" female, and quite a bit of this is due to my having very dense bones from 30 years of lifting, not all muscle, and I'm still quite tiny.

My muscles really are not that big, but they show a lot of definition because I'm quite lean. If I gained some fat then I would have a softer more toned look (which is OKAY too!). Then if I gained more fat I would look bulky and hefty like I did most of my life until last year. YOU CAN HAVE WHATEVER YOU WANT. Lean and ripped, soft and toned, or hefty, it all depends on how much fat you leave on your body. Calories are the only thing that changes fat. Exercise is for changing or maintaining your lean body mass only. Lifting weights will give you the best bang for your buck for shaping your body. I finally changed my shape by putting lifting first and cardio 2nd. You cannot out exercise too many calories.

Being on a calorie deficit is hard. You can't do this journey on will power alone. You must set up your environment for success. Have a team around you in your real life, not just online. Get trigger foods out of the house. It will take some sacrifice and it's not easy. You might have to say no to some social events sometimes.

For me it's all about a calorie budget. I had less of a budget available when I was losing weight, more to spend now that I'm maintaining and all the tools I used for weight loss come into play for the rest of my life maintaining.

When you have accumulated excess fat, you have accumulated a debt. It is hard to pay off the debt (you have less calories to spend). If you are sitting next to someone your same gender and height and they are not overweight and you are, they get to eat more than you (have more calories to spend) because they are debt free. You have less calories to spend because you are paying off your debt.

make a thread, and post the thread.

I answer these without judging, only the desire to help:

"I can't afford to buy healthy food." - Healthy food can be cheap, too. At the very least, eat less of the bad food. Calories, calories, calories. Most of what I eat is junk, but I just don't eat as much junk.
"I have a meal plan... its hard to keep track of the food they have." - Get veggies as a side and don't eat as much of the bad stuff.
"I never see any results." - Results take time.
"I don't have time to go to the gym." - If you have time to post this thread, you at least have time to talk a walk or do an exercise video.

Whenever I lack motivation to work out, I come on here and go to the success stories. Then I go work out. You can do this. Don't beat yourself up, we all have setbacks and struggles. It's how we deal with them:)

Whenever I lack motivation to work out, I come on here and go to the success stories. Then I go work out. You can do this. Don't beat yourself up, we all have setbacks and struggles. It's how we deal with them that counts:)

Hi,
I'm currently doing the p90x program. I know it sounds crazy, but it really does work. I started at 311 in July, I'm currently 276.

Iwe have an excellent support group if your interested in joining. The workouts aren't the main aspect however. It is the nutrition. Not dieting, but healthy food choices.

Just throwing it out there.
I hope you can believe in yourself. We have plenty of others including myself who felt the same way as you.

All the best
Simon

the three reasons people succeed

http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2012/10/22/3-reasons-people-succeed/

also, i suggest you read this one: http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2012/08/16/get-over-it/

So many wonder people here to support you, BUT you must be ready to help yourself. First you need to stop beating yourself up, talking negative to yourself and saying you can't do it is your first challenge. Begin to stop the negative thoughts as soon as they come into your head, tell yourself you can do it and what you want. Track your food even if your choices are not the best, make little changes each day a recognize your accomplishment. You will soon see that small little changes in what you eat and move make changes in your body and mind. Positive self talk works wonders. Like one other person said, one day three years ago I reach the point of "ready". I hated my body, hate hurting all the time, hated being sick all the time and I was so over it all. I knew the day I said I am STARTING right this second (not Monday) that I was there. Three years ago I started my journey and lost 50 lbs (my profile just shows the 2 lbs I lost on this website). Really it isn't that hard, overcoming your thoughts and defeating yourself is what you need to overcome then everything else will fall in place. Best of luck. Remember talk nicely to yourself and know you can do it.

Have you ever heard the story of the howling dog?

A man was walking by a house one day, and noticed a dog lying on the porch that was howling and moaning. The dog's owner was sitting on the porch, not minding the dog. The dog kept howling & wimpering.

'What's wrong with your dog?", the passerby asked the man.

"He's laying on a nail and it's hurting him".

"Well, why doesn't he got up off the nail?"

"Doesn't hurt enough yet, I guess."


When it hurts enough, you'll find the motivation to change your circumstances.

THIS
If you are truly sick of the lack in self esteem, the excess weight, the laziness.. you will do it. All of your "excuses" are simply that. You don't need loads of money to buy healthy food. You don't need to go to a gym. The internet is a vast and limitless source for exercises. You have a chair??? You can exercise. You just have to want it. So maybe, you need to want it more.

Try finding pictures of your perfect body. Pictures of healthy foods. Motivational posters. Make yourself a collage and put this somewhere you will see it everyday. Let it motivate you in the morning to do it finally!!!
Come on now... you can do this!!!! Can't is not an option!