Gender Specific Toys...
Busymomshantell
Posts: 126 Member
in Chit-Chat
My 3 year old son LOVES cars, trucks, trains - jumping, smashing and crashing. He doesn't like dolls or anything girly and has absolutely no interest in it, except the kitchen set and little things that go with it, microwave, toaster, dishes, play food etc...he likes to "fix" food and have to you "eat it".
He really has nothing that he NEEDS for Christmas and I had the idea to get him a kitchen set with all the little gadgets - the brown one, not pink or purple...my hubby is adamantly against this idea. Does not want to get it for him since there is something more boyish that he also wants. He is 3 - there is ALWAYS something that would be more boyish that he would want, but I don't agree about the kitchen set not being appropriate. I see no problem with it. Most Top Chefs in the world are men... But my husband said if there was nothing else at all (more boyish of course) that he wanted then maybe...Since when is there absolutely nothing that a 3 year old will want?
Opinions???
He really has nothing that he NEEDS for Christmas and I had the idea to get him a kitchen set with all the little gadgets - the brown one, not pink or purple...my hubby is adamantly against this idea. Does not want to get it for him since there is something more boyish that he also wants. He is 3 - there is ALWAYS something that would be more boyish that he would want, but I don't agree about the kitchen set not being appropriate. I see no problem with it. Most Top Chefs in the world are men... But my husband said if there was nothing else at all (more boyish of course) that he wanted then maybe...Since when is there absolutely nothing that a 3 year old will want?
Opinions???
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Replies
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Personally, I don't think kitchen's are really all that gender specific... unless perhaps if you are misogynist... even just a little.
But then my youngest brother got a way better kitchen play area than I did... and we let our toddler play with cars and "boy" toys as well...0 -
My (male) cuz & I used to swap toys after christmas. He liked dolls, I liked guns & cars. Never did either of us any harm.
I don't see any harm in letting your son play with what he wants too, he'll get pushed towards gender specific toys as soon as he gets to school anyway.0 -
Does he ever show and interest in one when at the toy store? If he doesn't then you might end up with a toy that goes unused.0
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One of my friends has a little boy who has the same kitchen set as my daughter. They both enjoy playing together at their respective homes on the same set. Nothing girly about it. They're both 3.
My nephew always loved pretending to sweep and vacuum. He loved it so much that his grandparents bought him little kid versions of a broom/tray set and a functioning vacuum in miniature (possibly the cutest vacuum on the planet).0 -
Let your husband choose. Guys know guys...period.0
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If he doesn't show an interest I would say it is a waste of money. However, they do have the play grill sets that may be more up his alley...0
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Let your husband choose. Guys know guys...period.
We do know period. It attracts bears, and we know to stay away from any female showing symptoms. #RUN0 -
If he shows interest and loves to pretend cook then I say go for it. My boys are 5 and 2 and they have a kitchen set. They "cook" all the time with it. They even have a shopping cart to go with it.0
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Maybe get him a grill and bacon0
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you mean flesh light?
Creepy when talking about a small child.0 -
If your kid won't play with it, it's money wasted. Would he play with it?0
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Your hsuband is ridiculous. But sadly so are a lot of people when it comes to toys.
Boys and girls both love to push things on wheels but we put baby strollers in front of girls and trucks in front of boys.
Both like to play with litte figures but we call them dolls for girls and action heroes for boys.
WHY do we have to call things girls toys and boys toys? Why can't they be toys for kids? If we enforce societal stereotypes on kids, they will internalize them even more. Teach diversity. Teach options. Teach all kinds of enjoyment. Does your husband ever cook? Cooking is not an activity solely reserved for those with vaginas. WIll your kid ever live on his own or go to college and know how to do some basic cooking? Probably. Let him be creative and use his imagination and fine tune his motor skills and give him a chance to explore and be adventurous. You don't just need a tree house for that.0 -
I don't know what everyone else is reading... but it read to me as though the boy does play with kitchen toys. But I could be wrong.0
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My 2 year old son loves fake food and his sisters' kitchen. If he didn't have any sisters I'd have no problem with buying him his own kitchen.0
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Let your husband choose. Guys know guys...period.
I agree.
Let your husband be the Dad here, even if you don't see the rationale behind it.0 -
I understand that the interest levels are going to be gendered. However, this is learned. Gender coding begins as early as in the womb. As soon as someone is deemed a boy or girl they are coded with gendered colours, clothes, activities, toys etc. Your son has been taught that toys are gendered and only some are appropriate for a boy. And this is continually reinforced by what you give him.
I would love if children were raised learning that colours, clothes, activities, toys, etc are gender neutral. Of course, society (school, friends, etc) is still going to gender things; however, he is 3 and you and your husband are the biggest influences on shaping his perspective right now.0 -
The play kitchen was the best thing I ever bought my 2 boys. They're 5 & 7 now and have had it for 4 years and its one of the few things that is still played with frequently. I got the cheapest one..it was like $30 and still is holding up strong.
Little Tikes does have a grill also, like you said.
My husband and I would rather that our kids express themselves and play with things that interest them instead of us forcing them to play with "boy" things and be someone that they're not--we are probably in the minority. Forcing anyone into gender specific roles doesn't make sense to us.0 -
My nephew had one when he was around 3/4 and he LOVED it.. he's not a feminine boy. He also loves all of the mini brooms/vacuums and things. He's 6 now and literally begs to come over and clean for me lol0
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I think your husband is wrong and behaving quite narrow minded. Then again, my husband is a wonderful cook and does all the cooking in our household. It's not even a gender question in my mind.0
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That seems silly to me but hey what do I know. My son has a grill that he loves. If your son will play with it why not?!0
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I think your husband is being stupid. Gender stereotyping doesn't help anything in our society.
When my son was 4, he loved to play with baby dolls, so that's what I got him for Christmas (in addition to other things that he enjoyed (books) or were good for him developmentally (legos)). It's about your kids being happy, not about what makes you or anyone else comfortable or uncomfortable.0 -
When my boys were little we bought them a kitchen (not girly colors) no big deal. I don't see that as a girly toy even though my daughter now has a kitchen too (diff one...old one fell apart). I never bought the boys dolls or anything like that, but she will play with their old cars/trucks and dolls.0
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Get it, like you said, most top chefs are men. Does your husband shy away from the kitchen in case it turns him all pink and fluffy?
My boys bake with me, we make cupcakes and all sorts. Doesnt stop them shooting me in the back of the head with a nerf gun 10 minutes later!0 -
Does your husband do any cooking in your home?
Get the kid the kitchen, FFS!0 -
I got my son a toy kitchen to play with while I cooked... he does not use it like intended. The cupboard and oven make a great hiding spot for his action figures, but he never pretends to cook with it! He likes toy kitchens everywhere else he goes, but not at home. Like others are saying, if he won't play with don't waste your money! My son is 3 and takes everything his daddy says very seriously...would your husband discourage your son from playing with the kitchen?
I like the idea someone else said about getting the grill instead of the kitchen, it's the same idea just more "manly."0 -
Get the kitchen for your son, and a cook book for your husband!0
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My soon to be 4 year old would like his own vacuum. His sister wants a remote control monster truck. They both like to play dress-up (sometimes as transformers/super heros, sometimes they are both princesses).
A kitchen is hardly gender specific - and even if he wanted a barbie doll, does it really matter?0 -
My husband and I had a discussion about it when we were looking for Christmas ideas. If my son showed an interest we would get it. However, I do know we would hear about it from other males in the family. Men sometimes get weird ideas in their head about what is gender "appropriate". My sister and I played with dolls, my brother played with action figures.0
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Does he ever show and interest in one when at the toy store? If he doesn't then you might end up with a toy that goes unused.
That is where I found out he really liked it. I dragged him out of the store crying about it. He plays with the one at the childcare at the grocery store.0
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