How the eff does one approach an attractive women?

It may be due to my extreme online gaming that I am the worlds most socially awkward group person. But not a thousand complements or tequila shots could make me approach nearly any lady who I had not yet been acquainted with.

I have been told it's just confidence etc etc, different methods such as ignoring her or just going straight up to her, but getting shut down by someone just frikken , makes me want to crawl in a whole.

Any tips from ladies or you baller guys? Do I just wait until I have cut to my ideal body shape, invest in ruphies (just kidding) ... Gosh.
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Replies

  • TommiEgan
    TommiEgan Posts: 256 Member
    Mate all it takes is Confidence, being yourself, being respectful and talking to them like a person not like an object!

    Honestly just get to know them and just listen to them!
  • elprincipito
    elprincipito Posts: 1,200 Member
    helps if your wallet is stacked and hanging out your pants :laugh:
    /thread?
  • MrMeowGi
    MrMeowGi Posts: 171
    Jewcy wallet idea definitely wins.
  • aforange
    aforange Posts: 116 Member
    Sonny Jim boy I've devoted the majority of my life to rotting in front of my xbox.

    After years of shrieking at young plebians that I am in fact breastically endowed and not a 14 year old yet to hit puberty I should probably be a socially inept sausage.

    My advice is to get your booty out there and start schmoozing those hotties, if you don't try you'll never know.
  • barb1241
    barb1241 Posts: 324 Member
    Try the same way as you approach one who is just average looking.
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
    avoidance is normal, fear is normal, it's just doing it that will break the cycle for you

    we're all afraid of rejection, and guess what, that girl is afraid of rejection just as much as the next person. just remember we're all human, we all share virtually the same feelings
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
    getting shut down by someone just frikken , makes me want to crawl in a whole.

    It's purely a numbers game. Some girls will like guys like you and some won't. The more girls you talk to the better your odds are of finding one that you get along well with. Don't be phony. Just be yourself and be confident in that.
  • beccag28
    beccag28 Posts: 43 Member
    You've just got to get out there and try, be as confident as you can, smile and be friendly. If she's nice then she will talk back, and if she doesn't then she isn't worth knowing anyway.
  • wrevhn
    wrevhn Posts: 864 Member
    Mate all it takes is Confidence, being yourself, being respectful and talking to them like a person not like an object!

    Honestly just get to know them and just listen to them!



    this.
  • RobynLB
    RobynLB Posts: 617 Member
    Make a habit of trying to be friendly to all sorts fo people in all sorts of situations, and it will start to feel natural when it comes to approaching an attractive woman. Take the pressure off and just enjoy meeting other people... including attractive women... they're juse people too you know... and most of them are pretty friendly
  • elprincipito
    elprincipito Posts: 1,200 Member
    but on a serious note, unless you can't talk at all to a girl (freeze up or something) the first girl you talk to will probably like you very much. just go up to one and talk about the weather...such an easy way to start talking with a girl.
  • LuluProteinFueled
    LuluProteinFueled Posts: 261 Member
    I remember reading a book called "The Pick-Up Artist" where this guy turned very socially awkward guys into pick up kings.

    They all started by walking around the city all day, just saying hello to women, any woman they could possibly say hello to, or asking for the time, or asking for directions, etc etc etc. After a few days of saying hi to hundreds of women, they were desensitized to the process of approaching a woman they didn't know. And then progressed to women at clubs, etc.

    So apparently practise = confidence.

    Good luck and remember to smile genuinely. A nice smile goes a long way! :smile:
  • Start with "Hi." Maybe add a genuine compliment. If shes a decent person (and interested), the conversation will grow from there organically.
  • aforange
    aforange Posts: 116 Member
    You walk up to the b!tch, ask her if she want the d!ck...
  • Danielle_2013
    Danielle_2013 Posts: 806 Member
    Practice.. on anyone and everyone, regardless of whether they are male, female, in your age bracket or not, and regardless of whether you find them attractive. The art of small talk, being comfortable socially and confident in general is not a natural skill for everyone. The lovely part is.. you can practice on people everywhere.. holding open doors, smiling, saying hello, making small talk in the grocery store line up. All of these things should help you feel less awkward.

    Fake it till you make it. Once you have some confidence, then look to approach women. I honestly wouldn't recommend you do so until you have managed to be comfortable socially for a while.
  • _JR_
    _JR_ Posts: 830 Member
    Well, I can tell you how NOT to do it................ definitely DO NOT follow her into the women's locker room, and try to tell her she's pretty! I've had ZERO success with that method!!! :wink: :drinker:
  • crystalflame
    crystalflame Posts: 1,049 Member
    It really helps if you find a good conversation starter. At a bar, sit near the girl and ask her what kind of beer she's drinking (assuming it's obviously not Bud or Miller) and if it's good, or cheer along with her if there's a sports game on, or say "I overheard you saying _" if she says something you could comment on, ask her to take a picture of you and your friends and then talk to her after... Anything to just get her attention and then get a conversation going. If she very obviously doesn't want to engage you in conversation, move on, but otherwise just start talking to her. If you click, ask for her number.

    Sometimes it's easier to meet someone not at a bar - we feel less like you're trying to get in our pants and more like you may be interested in us. If you see a girl at a coffee shop reading a book you've read, ask her how she likes it. But whatever you do, be friendly and not creepy.

    Girls like free drinks. Money helps.
  • MrMeowGi
    MrMeowGi Posts: 171
    Well, I can tell you how NOT to do it................ definitely DO NOT follow her into the women's locker room, and try to tell her she's pretty! I've had ZERO success with that method!!! :wink: :drinker:

    I also have had no success with just any type of stalking or staring...

    Someone get a thread started on biggest fail pickups ever, there going to be some jewcy stories.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Honestly, I suck at it, so I am last one to give advice.

    Just start by saying hi, asking her how she is. Don't try to pick her up, but try to talk to her.

    You can't be afraid of rejection, it's going to happen, it happens a lot to me.

    Good luck man, it's not easy..
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
    Try, "Hello, How are you today?"
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Try, "Hello, How are you today?"

    It really is that simple..
  • Ivy_leaves
    Ivy_leaves Posts: 103 Member
    Be charming, funny, polite, caring, independent, honest, successful, emotionally intelligent, witty, passionate, handy, possess fast reflexes, own or do something with your life, speak intelligently, share but also respond directly to 85% of what she shares, dress appropriately, don't smell bad, have some kind of somewhat unique talent or knowledge and look her in the eyes!

    Ya that should cut it. C:
  • TheRealJigsaw
    TheRealJigsaw Posts: 295 Member

    Girls like free drinks. Money helps.

    Avoid these kind of girls
  • Auzziedoggie
    Auzziedoggie Posts: 66 Member
    Whatever you do, don't do those PUA techniques. Women can spot them a mile away.

    Just DO it. You would be surprised at how many attractive women are not often approached by men. They will be seriously flattered that you are asking and just think that you made her day, even if she ultimately rejects you. If you aren't a creep about it, it will be a serious boost to her self-esteem.

    Notice how I'm talking about the effects on the girl? That is what you need to focus on to get over your self-consciousness. Focus on the other people's feelings and not what they think about you and you will take risks you never could before.
  • shiraLA
    shiraLA Posts: 272 Member
    Mate all it takes is Confidence, being yourself, being respectful and talking to them like a person not like an object!

    Honestly just get to know them and just listen to them!

    ^^^^this! The right girl will appreciate it!! you may have to deal with some rejection, but everyone does at some point.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member

    Girls like free drinks. Money helps.

    Avoid these kind of girls

    Wise words..
  • cgfol1
    cgfol1 Posts: 179 Member
    Always remember that no matter how good looking, ugly, cool, or dorky you are, EVERYONE gets rejected. Don't take it personally.
  • CassiusKnox
    CassiusKnox Posts: 305 Member

    Girls like free drinks. Money helps.

    Avoid these kind of girls

    I wish this web site had 'like' buttons.

    Confidence is key but remember confidence and cockiness are VERY different things. You dont wanna come across as a cocky, arrogant *kitten*.

    Be respectful, be polite, be interested. By 'be interested' I mean be interested in what THEY have to say. ENGAGE in conversation. Look them in the eye. Listen. Listen and remember. Make sure that by the end of the conversation you have listened AT LEAST as much as you have spoken.

    I think you are going to do great.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    I find sidling up to them sideways and putting on your biggest, best puppydog eyes works a treat.
  • PhotogNerd
    PhotogNerd Posts: 420 Member
    Just say hi...talk about video games if need be. (I'm an avid gamer) There's so many girls playing now..you never know.

    Tell funny stories....humor always got my attention first. :)