Weight + treatment from men / dating

I've never been overweight, and I've never gotten special attention from guys. Idk maybe I just look that bad lol

No to be honest! Apart from on MFP and Facebook. In real life I don't get approached in clubs or anything (which is fine with me btw lol) saying that, my friends are all super hot so the attention is usually on them when we are out!
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Hey all, so I used to be 280 highest and 150 lowest, have you girls losing weight found that you attract more or different men at different weight? If so what weight did you notice the change?

it's not really about weight per se. it's about how you look. if you're curvy, but not flabby, you'll get plenty of attention from all sorts of men. what weight shows on the scale at that point depends alot on your size and frame.

Men don't hit on me... I'm kinda scary in general:
Unless that guy at the gym on weekend afternoons who won't stop talking about himself and his weight gain while I'm trying to do cardio counts.

if you want guys to hit on you, just smile at us. it lets us know you are approachable. if guys aren't hitting on you now, you are probably putting out a vibe that says, "leave me alone!".

I find that I get a different kind of attention as a thinner person. I felt confident when I was 45 pounds heavier and maybe that showed. I didn't really have trouble attracting men when I was single. I'm not out looking now that I'm thinner, but I find that I get "the nod" from other fit women. It's kind of like we are in a private club for people that work hard to keep ourselves fit. My fiance notices that men look at me and mentions it to me, but I don't really notice because I'm not on the hunt.

I do really believe that it comes down to how you feel about yourself. If you think that you are awesome and a great person, then so will other people to a certain degree. I think there is a weight cut-off though. MY PERSONAL OPINION based on experience-not trying to offend anyone- I think that "overweight" is okay to attract men, but "obese" is not going to be generally accepted regardless of personality.

I was sometimes treated like I was invisible when I was almost 100 pounds heavier. People would cut in front of me in line like I wasn't even there.

I would get hit on more when slimmer but would still be hit on now - I honestly think its a confidence thing. Men do prefer slimmer women but would be attracted to larger women depending on how she carries herself and how she feels. I just assume I'm gorgeous and fool them :laugh:

I tend to wear clothes that don't show how much progress I've made so that by summer time it'll be like BAM! lol in other words, it's been about the same at highest and lowest weight. That's not saying much though because everytime I go out into a setting where people WOULD try to hit on me I always have my husband there and make it well known I'm interested in nooone else that way.

I've never been overweight, and I've never gotten special attention from guys. Idk maybe I just look that bad lol

No to be honest! Apart from on MFP and Facebook. In real life I don't get approached in clubs or anything (which is fine with me btw lol) saying that, my friends are all super hot so the attention is usually on them when we are out!
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It's 100% true. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong lol. Maybe I need to initiate contact

the only contact you need to do is make eye contact and smile. we know what that means. if you see a guy you want to approach you and he's available and interested, that's enough. if he's really shy, then maybe you'll have to say something to him first.

women are complicated. we still haven't figured you out. probably because we're easily distracted by sammiches.

men are simple. we are easy to figure out.

if you want to show interest, laugh at our corny jokes. flirtatiously tease us about non-offensive things like our wrinkled clothes or mismatched shoes and belt. the sort of stuff that women notice but we don't. lean in when we talk to you. smile. occasionally incidentally touch our arm while talking or laughing at our jokes. if you do all of that, there's not a guy on the planet who won't be able to figure out you are interested. at that point, it's up to the guy...

Thanks for the advice, I am sh1t when it comes to this stuff lol and extremely inexperienced

if you want to show interest, laugh at our corny jokes. flirtatiously tease us about non-offensive things like our wrinkled clothes or mismatched shoes and belt. the sort of stuff that women notice but we don't. lean in when we talk to you. smile. occasionally incidentally touch our arm while talking or laughing at our jokes. if you do all of that, there's not a guy on the planet who won't be able to figure out you are interested. at that point, it's up to the guy...

I find that in my experience men can be a little bit..unaware.. that someone is interested. Possibly they have their own esteem issues and wouldn't understand why anyone would even WANT to notice them (I suppose would women do this too). Sometimes you need to be a little more..obvious. Trust me..I have done all those things and still have had to come right out and ASK THEM Of course not all women are comfortable doing this but it's the way I am... So possible you are just around a lot of shy guys.

OR..

if you want guys to hit on you, just smile at us. it lets us know you are approachable. if guys aren't hitting on you now, you are probably putting out a vibe that says, "leave me alone!".

This is ME. I don't like to be 'hit on' I prefer to be the one in the lead so even though guys will look at me and put out signals I really just tend to play like I don't notice. My weight has never been a factor. I've been between 130 - 230 and never had an issue attracting someone when I felt the urge but as I said, I'm not normally shy about making my intentions obvious to those I'm interested in. I mean OK.. you can't just go and pick up on ANY guy but look for the signals that they are interested in you and then flash a BIG smile back and go from there

No to be honest! Apart from on MFP and Facebook. In real life I don't get approached in clubs or anything (which is fine with me btw lol) saying that, my friends are all super hot so the attention is usually on them when we are out!
x

Your friends must be insanely hot because I can't imagine you not getting a lot of attention when you go out.

Eye contact and a smile should be more than enough to draw in your target.

A question to the women then would you go for a overweight fat guy or some one toned who kept in shape