I don't "look" like I lost 50 lbs, so no one believed me.

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  • DiabolicBooger
    DiabolicBooger Posts: 198 Member
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    i was in a terrible meat grinder accident 2 years back....after my right arm was amputated...and the sever brain damage i gained 220 lbs, and thats with the arm missing....i recovered some braiin function but im still kinda retarded...
  • NittanyLion95
    NittanyLion95 Posts: 65
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    Hollywood is harsh and NOT reality. The reality is your doing good for YOU and that's all that counts. Congrats on the loss and eff anyone that says otherwise.
  • felice03
    felice03 Posts: 2,732 Member
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    Are you doing this for you or for them? Tell them to shove it where the garbage comes out! And if you really are in the entertainment industry that should give you some wonderful press!
  • lenniebus
    lenniebus Posts: 321 Member
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    No one has been quite that cruel to me, I have to say, but I have had some nasties to deal with. I think I've learned over my lifetime of ups and downs with weight and other issues that people's comments have alot more to do with them than with me. I try to step back and look at why they might say something nasty like that. In your situation, it seems like they are just pre-programmed to be super judgmental in an industry that tends to value the superficial. It might make you feel better to have a witty retort to hand back to them--or perhaps just to smile, ignore and pity them for their lack of depth and understanding. What I have learned is that hurting yourself is not the answer...you know you have lost an incredible amount of weight, you have to know that is impressive no matter what anyone says, and that small people don't matter in the grand scheme of things. Hang in there...pat yourself on the back...and don't expect much from these people...they truly are not capable of it.
  • Pixi_Rex
    Pixi_Rex Posts: 1,676 Member
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    Did people really say this to your face or are you just feeling like they did because they didn't say anything about how you were looking?
  • allifantastical
    allifantastical Posts: 946 Member
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    I'm so sorry! Congrats on your weight loss! Like others have said, you have to do it for you!
  • felice03
    felice03 Posts: 2,732 Member
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    i was in a terrible meat grinder accident 2 years back....after my right arm was amputated...and the sever brain damage i gained 220 lbs, and thats with the arm missing....i recovered some braiin function but im still kinda retarded...

    EH?
  • Carolyn_79
    Carolyn_79 Posts: 935 Member
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    People are downright rude at times. Please don't listen to journalists and fans as difficult as that might be. You're doing this for yourself and that's the only person that matters. It doesn't matter if you said anything about your weight loss or not. At some point someone would notice and then they'd all say, "She won't keep it off". That's just how the media is. Be proud of your success and keep going and prove them wrong.
  • HypersonicFitNess
    HypersonicFitNess Posts: 1,219 Member
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    Wait!!! Do NOT let others define your victory! You lost 50lbs!! That is an achievement no matter where you started!! 50lbs is 50lbs and that is excellent!

    YOU know you lost 50lbs, YOU know you dropped pant sizes...does it REALLY matter what others think? Because really, this is about YOU, not them....

    I have a different issue; people don't want to hear about my weight loss b/c they are still overweight and DON'T want to change their eating habits....so, what do they say to me? Frankly, my dear I think you could use putting a few pounds, you're too skinny! Really? Thanks! I busted my @ss to get this lean, mean body..and you're telling me I'm TOO skinny now? Except, I'm not!

    So...people will be jealous, people will be cruel, people will be obnoxious...but do NOT let them DEFINE YOU!!! YOU define you and YOU DEFINE your victory and you success! 50lb is a heck of a lot of weight to lose no matter where you started. And that deserves a pat on the back and high five!!

    3023188hr501wimqy.gif
  • erinnstreeter
    erinnstreeter Posts: 82 Member
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    That being said, there's some ugly truths you need to recognize. About 10% of people will genuinely care about your weight loss and be supportive. 40% will hate you for it, or be jealous of you, and the other 50% could care less unless there is something in it for them.
    That's the reality.

    ^^ This. Haters gonna hate. Love yourself - laud your efforts - listen *selectively* to the voices that respond, and if they're all negative, get some new people.
  • ScarlettVamp
    ScarlettVamp Posts: 828 Member
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    First, let me say that 50 lbs is a great achievement, no matter what your starting point is. You should feel great about that. So celebrate your successes, and take your setbacks as learning experiences and move on from them.

    That being said, there's some ugly truths you need to recognize. About 10% of people will genuinely care about your weight loss and be supportive. 40% will hate you for it, or be jealous of you, and the other 50% could care less unless there is something in it for them.
    That's the reality.

    I don't know you, and as such, I can't speak to your mental state or capacity, but I can say this, I've been losing weight, or mentoring others for a while now, and one thing I can say is that you need to worry about you, you can't let your feelings hinge on what a bunch of strangers think. The masses are cruel, mob rule is callous and unforgiving, if you put yourself out there, expect the harshest judgement you can think of, then make it worse.

    Allow those you love to be your real support, all the others out there should be tiny little marshmallow balls thrown at you, if you like them, have a few (but not to many) and enjoy, if you don't like them, let them bounce off you; because their commentary is only as important as you let it be.

    Continue your journey undaunted by the comments of fools, for only a fool would allow others to rule their though.

    Best luck

    -Banks

    ^^^^THIS!

    I have been going through some rough times personally for about 15 months and things got even worse over the summer. I found myself seriously depressed and then started eating anything and everything. I couldn't commit to the plan I had made for myself and next thing I new I had gained 15 lbs or so. I woke up about a week ago and said "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?". I'm back on program now, but it's funny that all those people who had been telling me how great I look and how awesome I am, had suddenly backed away like I had the plague. Thing is, I don't care what others think. I care what I THINK and how I FEEL. How do you get past this? Make a plan, kick yourself in the butt, and stick to it!
  • belladonna786
    belladonna786 Posts: 1,165 Member
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    You lost fifty pounds and you deserve respect from YOURSELF for it. No one else is going to respect you until you just start doing things to make yourself proud, not other people.

    On the other hand - you know what - you ARE freaking amazing. You ARE victorious.

    But if you dont believe it until other people recognize it - baby girl that is something you are gonna HAVE TO fix before you get to goal weight - or youre gonna have a whole new crop o probs

    :flowerforyou:





    ^^^This^^^^
  • hjsalas
    hjsalas Posts: 13 Member
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    You have done an Awesome job!! Do not let people get you down...we get soo excited to let people know what we have done and how hard we've worked to get rid of this weight...but some people are jealous or look at you like "I can do that, too"! Go ahead and try it people! Ha You've lost 50 once...so let's do it again! Keep your head held high and stay strong! :)
  • gypsyrose64
    gypsyrose64 Posts: 271 Member
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    Remember you have to do this for yourself, not anyone else! People always want to knock you down for your accomplishments, because major weightloss is hard, and not everyone has the willpower, so when someone does, people get jealous, and try to bring you down.

    There is this little book called "The Four Agreements" by Miguel Ruiz (http://www.miguelruiz.com/), and I recommend it to anyone having problems with mean and discouraging comments that people make. The book explains how everything a person says is a reflection of that person, not of the person they say it about. It will change your way of thinking. It teaches you not to internalize anything a person says to you. For example, someone is in a horrid mood, and they are hating the world, and they see you and make a nasty comment... they didn't say it because you deserved it, they said it because they were in a crappy mood and needed to take it out on someone. But then you take their words to heart (as we all tend to do), and let it affect our lives and behaviour.

    You lost 50 lbs, that's amazing. OWN IT. When someone says something nasty to you, just remember you lost 50lbs and they can't take that away from you. Seriously, if you want to say it "Hey I lost 50lbs what have you accomplished lately?" The answer will probably be NOTHING, and hence why they bring you down.

    And just wait, it will get so much better! Wait till you lose more, wait till you reach your goal weight and see what people say then. Yes, there will always be the a**holes who criticize, but you, especially being in the public eye, will become an inspiration for people who see how you changed your life.

    Good luck girl, and remember, the only opinion that counts is yours! You have to be in your own corner, because in this life the only person you can count on 100% is yourself! Love yourself, be so proud of yourself for making a change for your health, own your accomplishments, write off the setbacks (because no one is perfect!), reaffirm to yourself everyday how amazing you are, because when you change your own way of thinking about yourself, no one can touch you!

    I couldn't have said it any better!! ^^^^

    So many people out there make themselves feel better for putting others down. When you can put faith in your opinion alone, and not care what others think is when you find your true power!

    ((hugs))
  • FJHutch
    FJHutch Posts: 34
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    Haters gonna hate is unfortunately the truth I think.

    I got as far as 21 pounds off this year before health and head stuff got in the way and I needed to take a break from MFP to get myself sorted. I put nearly all of it back on pretty quickly - isn't that always the way? Fight to get every pound off but can stick them on 2 at a time with no trouble!

    You are doing this for you and ultimately your opinion of yourself is the one that matters x
  • Cupcakehippiemommy
    Cupcakehippiemommy Posts: 457 Member
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    I had mine over the holidays but I keep reminding myself of those little things that make losing the weight worth it. Keep at it doll and before you binge and turn to food.STOP.Grab a pencil and paper and write down all you are feeling, or grab a paint brush and paint whatever to help you express that sorrow instead of eating to make you feel worse doll! Once you are close to your goal you can look back at how far you ahve come not just visually but mentally and emotionally chica!Good luck <3
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    It's an awesome job.

    Couple things:

    You can't let others get to you. Especially if you are in show business. Some much tearing down of others happens in that field.

    Another thing, you can't please others. It just can't be done. I've done acting, sports, retail, customer support, and now corporate world and let me tell you.. there is one constant.. Some people will rarely be pleased.

    This journey is so much about finding yourself as it is losing weight. You have to be happy with yourself, you are the one that has to look in the mirror and live in your skin. No one else, their opinion is nice, but DOES not matter. I was doing great lost over 100lbs, then I started trying to impress others and I ended up rebounding a bit and gained around 25-28lbs in 30 days! You know what, screw (pardon language) what others think. I wanted their views of me to be something but deep down inside I just wanted to think I'm hot and handsome. I think if I can please myself (stop it sicko's who are thinking dirty on that comment) then the rest of the world will follow in line. If not, hey you can't please everyone! The most important person will be pleased with myself, and that's me.

    Keep your head up, keep working hard. You got this!
  • dansls1
    dansls1 Posts: 309 Member
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    Just remember YOU are the most important person and who you are doing this for. If you look and feel better, f' what anybody else says. (That's for you, for ME, I"M the most important, of course ;) ).
  • 2hmom
    2hmom Posts: 241 Member
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    I am at a stand still as far as weight loss. Frustrating,but I have lost inches,keep on going,hon. This is the right place to be. Just do it the healthy way,you won't be sorry.
  • jdploki70
    jdploki70 Posts: 343
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    What I did, ironically enough, was didn't tell anyone I was dieting. If someone mentioned it, other than my wife, I would say "oh, really?" I didn't even start posting on MFP until I was down close to my goal. By keeping it to myself, the weight loss became more about me than anyone else, and that was what was critical. I've tried losing before with hordes of people around, and tried doing an ad hoc sort of diet where I just didn't eat as much and sort of counted what I ate, and neither worked. I would drop 10-30 pounds, then put it all back on when I became sedentary again.

    So, by advice to avoid the emotional storm that can come from someone making an asinine comment, is to ignore the question entirely. And yes, weight loss in the beginning is much faster than later on. It's just a matter of discipline after a while.

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