Society's view on food
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And this post was not supposed to be about this specific woman, although I realize many people see it this way. This nameless woman is similar to people I see day in and day out at the grocery store/work/mall/vacation/pretty much every where. I see hundreds just like her each week.
If this were a one time thing, I would not have thought to even vent - but obesity is every where and you can't tell me that 99% of these cases are due to a bad thyroid or PCOS.
I was already annoyed due to bad food being pushed on me yesterday, and this topped it off.
Although I myself sometimes do wonder how overweight people can be happy, stuffing food so desperately into their mouths, I leave it as that, because thinking about it too much can lead to a) really unnecessary negative thoughts towards people b)my ego getting too big and thinking I'm superior to everyone else. So I think instead of thinking these people are "pushing" bad food on you, just take a step back and see they are sharing out what they have. Would you prefer to be around people who kept themselves to themselves, and excluded you because of your healthiness ?0 -
To the person who suggested this is the mentality of an ex-smoker; you are spot on, and I'm not going to argue with you one bit on that.
I'm sure that while one is a smoker, they hardly ever notice others' cigarette smoke. However, once they quit, anywhere they go if they smell it, it feels like it's being shoved in their face (even if this is not the case.)
This is exactly how I feel when it comes to unhealthy food.
I am glad you see that, and I only chime in because I have had a lot of these thoughts and feelings about food/other people/societal expectations. It has taken me about a year to get where I am now, and I am no authority on anything really, just trying to be mindful as possible about the experience. The first four months or so I lost more than forty lbs, and I basically excluded myself from all social outings and work parties because I didn't want to be places where people would give me crap about what I was or wasn't eating. In the past few months I have been working on being more moderate and willing to explain how/why I am or am not partaking in things. It is very hard some times, but I just remind myself that some day soon I want to be a positive advocate for my overweight patients. Understanding and learning to control my disgust at them - and my former self - is part of that process.
Best of luck on your journey, and I understand needing to rant, especially when it feels like everyone in the world is trying to sabotage you. My roomie's girlfriend is baking cookies right now
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Sometimes when life happens around us, it may not actually be about you, so don't take the red light personally. lol0
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So I go to the bathroom about a half hour later. The bathroom is outside our office, so I have to walk by it on my way out. This HUGELY OBESE woman walked by me with this massive plate of sugar crap, talking about how much she loved chocolate.
At that point, I felt soooooo validated in my decision to not partake.
That statement was mean....And speaks volumes about your character, or lack there of
X20 -
And this post was not supposed to be about this specific woman, although I realize many people see it this way. This nameless woman is similar to people I see day in and day out at the grocery store/work/mall/vacation/pretty much every where. I see hundreds just like her each week.
If this were a one time thing, I would not have thought to even vent - but obesity is every where and you can't tell me that 99% of these cases are due to a bad thyroid or PCOS.
I was already annoyed due to bad food being pushed on me yesterday, and this topped it off.
Although I myself sometimes do wonder how overweight people can be happy, stuffing food so desperately into their mouths, I leave it as that, because thinking about it too much can lead to a) really unnecessary negative thoughts towards people b)my ego getting too big and thinking I'm superior to everyone else. So I think instead of thinking these people are "pushing" bad food on you, just take a step back and see they are sharing out what they have. Would you prefer to be around people who kept themselves to themselves, and excluded you because of your healthiness ?
Thank you for this, and I do ask myself these questions these questions a lot. I think many times it's a mixture of both - people who just want to share, and people who do indeed want to sabotage. I try to differentiate between the two before getting annoyed, but sometimes it is hard.
Thanks for understanding though, and letting me vent.0 -
It didn't come off as "society's view" but your view, and the comment was HUGELY insensitive. I applaud your efforts to refrain from the pastries. Yes, it bothers me that everything around the holiday's revolves around food but who doesn't know this? Rather than say that peeves you, you chose to target the obese woman and say, "This is the reason I don't eat that crap!!" Because she's making bad decisions and you perceive that society accepts the way she eats but not the way you eat.
Oh - and yes, I have PCOS, but that isn't the reason I topped out at 376. No doubt it played it's part, but it isn't the sole reason. And obviously I've been able to do something about it - I'm about half way to my goal. Sometimes I do eat a pastry, but that's really none of your business.0 -
I just read the OPs profile. It explains a lot. **exiting this thread**0
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At 215 I was close to being obese.
And no, that was not okay for me either. That's why I did something about it.0 -
Don't let the door hit you on the way out.0
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My work has a wellness clinic on site that has a wellness coach, nutritionist, physical therapist on staff to help reduce health care costs for the company.
Thursday, I had training at work and pastry trays and coffee were provided in the morning and individual bags of large size snack chips, trail mix and candy bars with sugar and diet soda was the snack in the afternoon. This was provided by the on site company that provides food services. The afternoon snack bags were easily 1000 calories + 200 more if you add a can of coke.
All day long in my head I was singing "And isn't it ironic... don't you think" just like the song.0 -
I just read the OPs profile. It explains a lot. **exiting this thread**
What was on her profile that you found? I found her profile to be uplifting!0 -
Paprika - this is EXACTLY what I'm talking about!!!!0
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She hates the fact I was successful, and I love my body.0
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I just read the OPs profile. It explains a lot. **exiting this thread**
What was on her profile that you found? I found her profile to be uplifting!
Thank you again for your support, and your words.
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My work has a wellness clinic on site that has a wellness coach, nutritionist, physical therapist on staff to help reduce health care costs for the company.
Thursday, I had training at work and pastry trays and coffee were provided in the morning and individual bags of large size snack chips, trail mix and candy bars with sugar and diet soda was the snack in the afternoon. This was provided by the on site company that provides food services. The afternoon snack bags were easily 1000 calories + 200 more if you add a can of coke.
All day long in my head I was singing "And isn't it ironic... don't you think" just like the song.
What's ironic is that nothing in her song was *actual* irony, it was just bad luck
http://www.copyblogger.com/did-alanis-morissette-get-irony-right/
But I'm right with you, I think that it's awful that people are tempted at their workplaces with high calorie snacks!!0 -
I just read the OPs profile. It explains a lot. **exiting this thread**
What was on her profile that you found? I found her profile to be uplifting!
hmm...inspirations..."my thigh gap."....."I like that I don't have an once [sic] of fat on my stomach." Very interesting. To ME it explains a lot.0 -
She hates the fact I was successful, and I love my body.
She? being me? Ummm no. I don't. I hate the fact that you aimed for the lowest possible "healthy" weight and you're praising the very ideals perpetuated in pro-ana communities AND that you're judging someone who has yet to reach the level of motivation that prompted you to begin your journey. everyone starts somewhere and your thoughts (explained in this post) were downright insensitive and hurtful.0 -
I won't apologize to you for liking that, and being happy with my body.
I won't apologize to you that I enjoy clothes shopping, do not feel sluggish, and have tons of energy.
Yes, I am skinny. I am also healthy, and eat 2000 calories a day of GOOD food.
But if you're looking for an apology for that, you are barking up the wrong tree.0 -
I won't apologize to you for liking that, and being happy with my body.
I won't apologize to you that I enjoy clothes shopping, do not feel sluggish, and have tons of energy.
Yes, I am skinny. I am also healthy, and eat 2000 calories a day of GOOD food.
But if you're looking for an apology for that, you are barking up the wrong tree.
I'm not asking for you to apologize for those things--I'm simply pointing out that your judgmental, rude, and hurtful tone/approach/perspective on life is rather disgusting. You've been where she was and just because you've seen the light you've become condescending. That's wrong. Period. That's my view and I won't apologize for that. Love your body all you want. Don't go around expecting everyone to cheer you on as you go through life JUDGING those who could use SUPPORT.0 -
You again are barking up the wrong tree. I am anything but pro-ana.
If you must know, my original goal was 136. After I hit maintenance and upped my calories, my weight continued to drop 10 more pounds. I went to the doctor, got checked out, and was fine. In fact, my stats from the blood work was awesome. With that, I also enjoy being skinny. What this also means is that I don't have to apologize to you for it.0 -
She hates the fact I was successful, and I love my body.
She? being me? Ummm no. I don't. I hate the fact that you aimed for the lowest possible "healthy" weight and you're praising the very ideals perpetuated in pro-ana communities AND that you're judging someone who has yet to reach the level of motivation that prompted you to begin your journey. everyone starts somewhere and your thoughts (explained in this post) were downright insensitive and hurtful.
BZZZZZZZZZZZZT WRONG ANSWER!
you're an evil little one, aren't you. From your profile pic I would guess that you TOO are in the lower half of the "healthy" weight range based on the charts.
What the hell is wrong with aiming for the bottom of the BMI chart? what happens if you miss, and wind up 5 pounds above your goal? had the goal been ten pounds higher she might have had trouble reaching where she is today!
And she can't help that pro ana people think the same way, the only difference between us calorie cutters and anorexic individuals is we don't let our thoughts go too extreme, we don't cut too deply, they do. it's all a matter of degrees.
I am so sick of hearing about ana and mia on this site. anyone who even comes close to wanting to look the way they want is demonized as an eating disorder person.
GTFO!0 -
After reading this - it kind of makes me want to cry. It really is "damned if you do, damned if you don't" when it comes to eating healthy. When your coworkers know you eat healthy, it is like they get this "i must sabotage" mentality.
Eat healthy = anorexic.
Eat unhealthy = obese.
Perhaps this is all in my head, though from what i have noticed in my own coworkers and family, and with what i have read on here - it is pretty obvious that others will judge us based on what we eat.
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After reading this - it kind of makes me want to cry. It really is "damned if you do, damned if you don't" when it comes to eating healthy. When your coworkers know you eat healthy, it is like they get this "i must sabotage" mentality.
Eat healthy = anorexic.
Eat unhealthy = obese.
Perhaps this is all in my head, though from what i have noticed in my own coworkers and family, and with what i have read on here - it is pretty obvious that others will judge us based on what we eat.
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dakotababy - it so much is damned if you do, damned if you don't, isn't it?0
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LOL, thanks Chris!0
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When all these other angels in this thread see cause and effect in real time, they're charitable enough to pretend like there's no correlation.
Clap.
clap.
clap.0 -
what is wrong with these angry people. don't let these cranky people get you down, girl. you should be proud of how fit you are, isn't that what you worked for? wtf.0
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When all these other angels in this thread see cause and effect in real time, they're charitable enough to pretend like there's no correlation.
Clap.
clap.
clap.
I know, right?0 -
Isn't it bogus that all of those who are so down on you, insulting and accusing you about being rude, judgmental and all type of mess are themselves guilty of doing the EXACT same thing to you--equally as guilty of all of the negative things they accuse you of and maybe even a bit more. :noway:
That said, you're my shero for the way you think and more important for not merely "talking the talk" but actually walking the walk by having the attitude of YUCK, this gluttony and/or (fill in the blank of why you allowed yourself to become overweight) is no longer cool nor for me and you did the hard work, the dedication, the self-denial it took to get where you are and where I have faith that you will be for the rest of your life...slim and trim and healthy in body, mind and soul. I'm proud of you--you ROCK, period.0
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