Are they just lucky?

24

Replies

  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    As some people have already stated, you don't know the exact eating or exercise habits of those you observe to be "naturally skinny".

    No one is just lucky. There are other trends at work.

    I know what MY exercise and eating habits were when I was in that category. Just sayin'.

    Did you record intake and expenditure? I'm curious how much your TDEE changed if you have that data. It would make for interesting discussion since in most cases people have anecdote and not data.

    Sorry to butt in. But I tracked my husbands intake and expenditure on MFP actually. He took in about 2500-3000 calories and does not work out. He's 5"6 and 120lbs. Just shows that it -is- possible for someone to just have a high metabolism. That being said, being thin doesn't necessarily make them healthy.

    What does he do for a living and did you weigh his food?
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    Naturally skinny people = eat less calories than imagined and / or do more activity than is imagined.

    Activity = planned (exercise) but particularly spontaneous (general everyday movement like walking, standing, fidgeting, gardening, cleaning etc etc)

    ^ Bolded part being gigantic. And unless you're using tightly controlled means of measuring this, you can't really assume that the skinny guy doesn't just move more than you think.
  • I think you'll find those skinny people don't eat as much as you think they do and that they are very active. I get accused of eating all day long but my daily intake is actually about 1300 calories. There are very few people in the world who have a super metabolism. Most people are within 5% of each other whether fat or thin.

    so so very true. Really think about it. I know a lot of thin people who eat junk, but they pick at it. A cookie here, a few chips there, etc... It always looks like they are eating crap, but they eat very little of it.

    True. When I was 20 I would eat as much as I could and would only go for calorie dense food so I would not "waste the room in my stomach" on low calorie food. No matter how much I tried I would rarely intake above 1400 or so. Usually around 1100.
  • It means they don't overeat, plain and simple.

    Pizza, ice cream, bacon, etc do not make you fat. Overeating does.

    This, all the way! I have eaten "whatever I want" since starting MFP 4 months ago, and have lost 28 pounds. I stopped overeating. That's it. Check my diary for proof!
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
    These people are usually very active, even if they're not specifically working out they no doubt move more in general, That, or they don't eat as much as you think. You can eat nothing but junk food and be under the amount of calories you need to maintain your weight, it's not the type of foods (when it comes to simple weight loss) but more the amount of energy/calories.

    Ex 1: You have a friend, and go out for lunch once a week and all you see him/her eat is high calorie foods. They order big main meals, with calorie dense foods. They get dessert and eat a ton...... etc, while you're there ordering grilled chicken with salad and wondering how they find it so easy. What you may not know is this friend doesn't eat much beforehand, or just has a light meal / snack in the evening instead of a traditional dinner. Every other area of their life is in moderation, apart from these days out. You don't lose weight by eating low calorie foods for 1 meal a week, so it's very unlikely that you'll gain weight from 1 high calorie meals a week if the rest of your diet is in check.

    Ex 2: Friend says "I eat what I want, when I want" or words that are similar. They may well do, but what they want may be a lot less than you. They may feel full / satisfied easier and be able to leave the plate without finishing it all. They may genuinely have a dislike for a lot of normal high calorie junk foods. Usually their total calorie intake is the same or less than is actually required to maintain their weight. Either that or they're lying to make themselves seem better.

    Ex 3: Friend eats a ton, unhealthy, high calorie foods. You name it, they eat it! You may spend a lot of time with them, know that it's not just a treat every now and again. Yet you don't realise how much more active they are than you. They may have an active job, spend a lot of the time cleaning the house, or doing chores (I know someone who never sits still!) You don't have to visit the gym to burn calories, or do planned workouts just to lose weight, especially if you don't move much at the moment.

    Of course, there are exceptions to every rule. Some people genuinely have a fantastic metabolism or great genetics, while others have the short end of the stick and find it easy to gain weight, or have a crappy metabolism. Yet this number is so much lower than people think. I don't believe people get 150lbs overweight from a slow metabolism if they're eating sensibly. A bit overweight, I can understand but not excessively so. Get them to log their food accurately and consistently, as well as monitoring their exercise, then you'll know for sure. It could be a real eye-opener!
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    My mother-in-law is always accusing me of this, which is funny because I'm not what I would consider skinny (although I am headed for slim, hopefully) and I've been using this site and working at losing weight for the past nearly two years. She says that because when we have a big meal at their house I will have a little of the rice pudding, or cheesecake, or whatever. What she doesn't see (although I have told her) is me logging that later and making adjustments to my intake for the day to compensate.

    I doubt the number of people who can eat whatever they want and stay skinny is nearly as high as people think. I think in her case it's a two-fold fallacy. One, she says that she has to "starve herself and live at the gym" to lose, which I doubt is true. And two, she thinks that I "lose weight very easily" which is categorically false.
  • umachanxo
    umachanxo Posts: 926 Member
    As some people have already stated, you don't know the exact eating or exercise habits of those you observe to be "naturally skinny".

    No one is just lucky. There are other trends at work.

    I know what MY exercise and eating habits were when I was in that category. Just sayin'.

    Did you record intake and expenditure? I'm curious how much your TDEE changed if you have that data. It would make for interesting discussion since in most cases people have anecdote and not data.

    Sorry to butt in. But I tracked my husbands intake and expenditure on MFP actually. He took in about 2500-3000 calories and does not work out. He's 5"6 and 120lbs. Just shows that it -is- possible for someone to just have a high metabolism. That being said, being thin doesn't necessarily make them healthy.

    What does he do for a living and did you weigh his food?

    Nothing that requires much physical labour. If any at all. And yes, I weighed his food. Since I was tracking for myself, everything I cook is weighed and portioned. His portions are always double, because that man can eat. Though, he goes through periods where he's not as hungry and eats less. Perhaps that could account for the fact that he doesn't seem to gain? Or maybe it'll just hit him in 5 years and he'll gain a whole bunch of weight. :P
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
    I knew someone like this. She was the skinny ***** in the group. We would go out to eat as friends, and she'd eat with us and we would wonder how she does that. As time dragged on, and we really got to know her, sometimes, she didn't eat all day and the only meal she ate was with us that evening. We would go traveling together, and other than coffee, she just never ate. It was bizarre. But, that's why she was skinny. If you just see her as a friend here and there, or even everyday, you would see her eat and think she has a fast metabolism, what you didn't see is how she didn't eat the whole rest of her day or night.
  • christabel6
    christabel6 Posts: 173 Member
    The only person I personally know who does this has chronic fatigue syndrome and has to eat high calorie food just to stay up at a natural healthy weight. It's only been like this since her health condition kicked in. As she said, she would rather have a healthy life and struggle with her weight than the other way round :-(

    But you are here and doing the work and because of that you'll get there!
  • sammys1girly
    sammys1girly Posts: 1,045 Member
    I was skinny most of my life and ate whatever I wanted, including lots of junk food (not good for me, i know...).
    So I credit that to a fast metabolism and staying fairly active. Once I hit 40ish, wow, that changed. I am still
    active and eat whatever I want, but in much smaller amounts.
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    Though, he goes through periods where he's not as hungry and eats less.

    This is pretty normal, they eat a ton for a few days then they eat very little. If he eats 3000 for a few days then eats 1800 a few days it can certainly offset things quite fast.

    How long did you do this for?
  • As some people have already stated, you don't know the exact eating or exercise habits of those you observe to be "naturally skinny".

    No one is just lucky. There are other trends at work.

    I know what MY exercise and eating habits were when I was in that category. Just sayin'.

    Did you record intake and expenditure? I'm curious how much your TDEE changed if you have that data. It would make for interesting discussion since in most cases people have anecdote and not data.

    Sorry to butt in. But I tracked my husbands intake and expenditure on MFP actually. He took in about 2500-3000 calories and does not work out. He's 5"6 and 120lbs. Just shows that it -is- possible for someone to just have a high metabolism. That being said, being thin doesn't necessarily make them healthy.

    What does he do for a living and did you weigh his food?

    Nothing that requires much physical labour. If any at all. And yes, I weighed his food. Since I was tracking for myself, everything I cook is weighed and portioned. His portions are always double, because that man can eat. Though, he goes through periods where he's not as hungry and eats less. Perhaps that could account for the fact that he doesn't seem to gain? Or maybe it'll just hit him in 5 years and he'll gain a whole bunch of weight. :P
    Does he fidget a lot or tend to get nervous easily?
  • ChitownFoodie
    ChitownFoodie Posts: 1,562 Member
    My BMR is incredibly low, 1114. I don't do cardio, like running or Zumba, but I still remain active. On an average non-lifting day, my TDEE is 2,200. I don't have a freak metabolism, I just lift and walk around. And I do have a desk job, so you'd think I'd have a lower TDEE but when I am not sitting at my desk, I am moving around.
  • Natashaa1991
    Natashaa1991 Posts: 866 Member
    we don't eat that much, really.
    next time just carefully observe what (or even better, how much) a skinny person eats. you will see that even though they don't deny themselves anything, they actually don't eat that much.
    knowing to stop when you're satisfied is the secret ;)
  • kelleyellen
    kelleyellen Posts: 2 Member
    My husband is one of those people, and trust me he EATS a lot. And junk. But he is skinny. He has a very active job, but he was the same even when he had a desk job. Some people have a higher metbolism. It makes it a little harder for me because he likes to have junk food around the house, He tries to get junk food that I don't like, but sometimes it is hard. He is very supportive of my efforts tho.
  • PandaCustard
    PandaCustard Posts: 204 Member
    My husband (as well as my mother-in-law) are like this. I'm not sure what or how much my mother-in-law eats, though the times we have dinner together she does tend to eat quite a bit. My husband, on the other hand, is a different story. He's 6'1" and currently 150 pounds, but he had to struggle to even get up to that weight. During the summer, he had actually reached the high 130s and was underweight. During that time he packed on calories as much as he could. I remember him putting away 4000 calories a day for a while there. Now he doesn't eat AS much , but he still puts away 2500-3000 a day on average and stays at 150, with a ~2 lb fluctuation. He doesn't work out at all, either: his hobbies include video games and more video games.

    His mom is on medication to keep her from losing weight, so I'm guessing that they both maybe have a metabolic disorder. It isn't a great thing; my husband says he is tired of having to eat so much to keep from being underweight.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    As some people have already stated, you don't know the exact eating or exercise habits of those you observe to be "naturally skinny".

    No one is just lucky. There are other trends at work.

    I know what MY exercise and eating habits were when I was in that category. Just sayin'.

    Did you record intake and expenditure? I'm curious how much your TDEE changed if you have that data. It would make for interesting discussion since in most cases people have anecdote and not data.

    No, But my previous post lists what I ate on a daily basis. It was a lot and I didn't exercise ever. The year I turned 29 I started gaining weight for no obious reason. I had the same job, the same daily activities and the same diet I'd had the year before. Suddenly, I was gaining when I never had that problem before and I had to modify my lifestyle in order to lose that weight.

    When I think about what I ate back in the day vs. what I eat now, I should weigh 300 pounds. Restaurant meals more than once a week (always with dessert -- lunch was at least 2,000 calories alone); fast food -- and not the healthier, low-calorie options; and no exercise to speak of.

    I'm a creature of habit and always got the same meals at restaurants so I can look back and tell you what my calorie intake was at the time. If I ate like that now, even with exercising nearly daily, I would be gaining weight left and right.

    I just looked up my regular entree at TGI Friday, where I often went with people from work: Sizzling chicken and cheese for 1,100 calories and I cleaned my plate and had dessert every time. Then ate dinner. That's just one example.

    So, you ate more calories a few times a week? What did you eat the rest of the time?
  • sammniamii
    sammniamii Posts: 669 Member
    Sometimes its medical - my hubby used to HAVE to eat roughly 4000 cals a day. (We learned the hard way in our youth = broke. Ate so cheaply for 15$ a week - he lost so much weight so fast, he was getting sick) He honestly could eat ANYTHING he wanted, as often as he wished, in any amount he wanted. If he failed at that, he could loose 10 pounds in a week.

    Years of this.... and we found out he had a SUPER hyperactive thyroid (Graves Disease) which caused serious medical problems (weakness, mental issues, heart problems, body shaking). His thyroid is now under control and it has effected his weight. He's gained 45 pounds (3 pant sizes - he was wearing a 29/30 waist up until his 28th birthday). He now watches what he eats (but his soda intake is his biggest issue - at least a 2lt a day) but he hates that it finally caught up with him.

    So, some people may have a medical issue (even if they don't know it) which allows them to eat like they do.

    Others... well, it will catch up with them in one way or another (if they aren't doing things like exercising it off somehow).
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    I love how when people assume a thin person eats a lot everyone jumps up to say, "You don't know what that person is really eating or how me he or she is exercising," but when someone who WAS one of those people tells you exactly what she was eating and how much she was exercising, everyone jumps up to tell that person she's wrong about her own lfe experience.

    So, you can't know what someone does unless that person's experience goes against what you think is reality and then suddenly you know all about her habits.

    The truth is, there ARE people who are just lucky. Not everyone, of course. But they exist. Metabolic rate is not static person to person. There are factors such as brown fat and hormones that affect how one metabolizes the energy consumed, so one person can eat 3,000 calories a day and maintain his or her weight and another person of the same age, height and gender can consume 3,000 calories a day and gain weight.

    There was a study done a few years ago on twins measuring brown fat and its affect on weight gain that pretty much proves what I'm saying.
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
    Though, he goes through periods where he's not as hungry and eats less.

    This is pretty normal, they eat a ton for a few days then they eat very little. If he eats 3000 for a few days then eats 1800 a few days it can certainly offset things quite fast.

    How long did you do this for?

    As a teenager and young adult that's how I ate. A few days of ice cream, cheeseburgers, fries and crap, then I'd be off food for a few days and eat next to nothing. The problem started when I got married and had a husband who ate 3 meals a day. I'd never really learned portion control so things got out of hand.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    So, you ate more calories a few times a week? What did you eat the rest of the time?

    The same. I ate out for lunch every day and then had dinner. I ate a lot. Believe me or don't believe me. I really don't care anymore.
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    The only person I personally know who does this has chronic fatigue syndrome and has to eat high calorie food just to stay up at a natural healthy weight. It's only been like this since her health condition kicked in. As she said, she would rather have a healthy life and struggle with her weight than the other way round :-(

    But you are here and doing the work and because of that you'll get there!

    This is interesting to me because I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and apparently I missed this particular symptom :P For me it affects me the opposite, because when it's flaring up I can barely drag myself off the couch.
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    Years of this.... and we found out he had a SUPER hyperactive thyroid (Graves Disease) which caused serious medical problems (weakness, mental issues, heart problems, body shaking).

    I should dig up a source on this as I recall reading about it -- apparently hypothyroid is not nearly as pronounced as hyperthyroid. I still believe that these conditions are more often excuses vs when it's actually diagnosed (people often assume thyroid problem without being diagnosed) -- but those who legitimately have an overactive thyroid indeed need to eat crap-tons of calories.
  • 3foldchord
    3foldchord Posts: 2,918 Member


    Nothing that requires much physical labour. If any at all. And yes, I weighed his food. Since I was tracking for myself, everything I cook is weighed and portioned. His portions are always double, because that man can eat. Though, he goes through periods where he's not as hungry and eats less. Perhaps that could account for the fact that he doesn't seem to gain? Or maybe it'll just hit him in 5 years and he'll gain a whole bunch of weight. :P

    Sounds like my husband. I don't weigh his food, but it doesn't take a scale to know that 2 chicken breasts smothered in cheese and 2-3 large helping of mashed potatoes is a lot more than my 1 chicken breast and steamed veggies.
    My husband does twitch his legs all the time though. I would think habitual shaking your foot while eating would burn THAT much, but maybe it does. Maybe at need to start twitching more.
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member


    Nothing that requires much physical labour. If any at all. And yes, I weighed his food. Since I was tracking for myself, everything I cook is weighed and portioned. His portions are always double, because that man can eat. Though, he goes through periods where he's not as hungry and eats less. Perhaps that could account for the fact that he doesn't seem to gain? Or maybe it'll just hit him in 5 years and he'll gain a whole bunch of weight. :P

    Sounds like my husband. I don't weigh his food, but it doesn't take a scale to know that 2 chicken breasts smothered in cheese and 2-3 large helping of mashed potatoes is a lot more than my 1 chicken breast and steamed veggies.
    My husband does twitch his legs all the time though. I would think habitual shaking your foot while eating would burn THAT much, but maybe it does. Maybe at need to start twitching more.

    Collectively, non exercise activity thermogenesis is a very big contributor to total calories burned.
  • I have someone I know. That I know for a fact is much lazier than I am. She isn't very active at all, does everything at a snails pace. Although I do not know how much she eats I do know what she eats. I have never paid attention to the amount. She is very picky and eats mostly fried chicken fingers, mashed potatoes, french fries and pizza. That is pretty much what I have seen her eat and she weighs 90lbs soaking wet! I wouldn't want to be this skinny. She looks unhealthy but it would be nice to eat like that...lol

    My only guess just a very high metabolism and maybe she doesn't eat much food???
  • 3foldchord
    3foldchord Posts: 2,918 Member
    The only person I personally know who does this has chronic fatigue syndrome and has to eat high calorie food just to stay up at a natural healthy weight. It's only been like this since her health condition kicked in. As she said, she would rather have a healthy life and struggle with her weight than the other way round :-(

    But you are here and doing the work and because of that you'll get there!

    This is interesting to me because I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and apparently I missed this particular symptom :P For me it affects me the opposite, because when it's flaring up I can barely drag myself off the couch.

    Same here. Was there a symptom list we could have picked from? I was down all day yesterday with muscle weakness and fatigue, hoping to kick into the curb today so I can get stuff done here with these kids!
  • brevislux
    brevislux Posts: 1,093 Member
    I'm sorry, but I don't believe there's such a thing. It's a lie.

    Most people I know believe I'm naturally skinny. To be honest, I have no idea why they'd think that - I'm vegan and I restrict my eating more than most people I know, plus I'm very active. However, I eat very frequently and when I do eat sweets and such, it's almost exclusively with friends and not alone, which might probably cause this impression.
    I've had past roomates say I was just naturally skinny when they had their pantry full of chips and chocolate and all I had there was beans and lentils.

    My boyfriend thinks he's naturally skinny, but I know he just eats too little for a guy who's 6'4. He's certain he eats tons, but I'm sure he hardly gets to 2000 cals a day.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    Now that I am getting back to a weight that fits with higher activity levels I am also eating more - and both my planned exercise and NEAT are starting to ramp up.

    So if you set with me at lunch today you'd think I was a monster eater - Burger King Chicken BBQ Large Menu (diet coke) AND a Whopper Burger (no bun) AND a protein bar -- all together close to a 1200 calories, for lunch. But, given my activity level for the day and week - this is fine - my dinner will be lighter and I'll likely log at 2000 or so net - which is still a deficit for me right now - maintenance is about 2200-2400 (without exercise). Don't judge by what you see, in terms of activity or NEAT a lot is hidden.
  • imhungry2012
    imhungry2012 Posts: 240 Member
    I have a friend who was slightly offended when I said something along those lines, implying that "she was lucky she could eat whatever she wanted" and she responded and let me know that she works really hard to be fit, works out regularly and generally eats well but induldges when she is with friends, out to eat and holidays...not all the time. She has always been fit, not because she is lucky but because she has always worked at it and it has always been her lifestyle.

    Given how hard I am working now I may feel the same way if someone said that I was just lucky. I do think some people are just genetically blessed though :)