Lost 56 lbs and no one noticed!!!

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  • abutterflyemerges
    abutterflyemerges Posts: 101 Member
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    I wanted to thank all of you who had posted a response to my message. As I sit here reading all of your post I am filled with tears and happiness that there is someone out there who understands me and that I am not alone in this journey. After I posted the message I have to admit I felt very sad and tonight I gave up for the first time in 4 months. I exercise 7 days a week and tonight I did no such thing. I also follow a very strict 1200 calorie diet and tonight I said "screw it". But after doing that and feeling horrible about what I did I came to my computer and read all the post that poured in. I am overwhelmed with support and love from you all and feel that I am over this hump and can go on and finish what I started. I have to keep reminding myself that there is support among people I do not even know and that we are all here for the same reason. Wouldn't it be nice to be actual "live" friends.

    Thank you all again, you have touched me and given the courage and strength to keep going.

    :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • Keltinator
    Keltinator Posts: 265
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    ah, yes. i was commenting on how my belts were getting looser now, and my mom said that they must have stretched... i was like, NO, it's actually because i've lost a couple inches off my waist. thanks, mom.

    keep working hard towards your goals! people will definitely notice. :)
  • Tamishumate
    Tamishumate Posts: 1,171 Member
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    if it helps any, I saw someone today who I had seen in a few years and she didnt say one word about it. I went up to her, said hello , so and so, and she just looked at me, then looked at my name tag, ( she came into the store I work at) and said, "ohhh yeah, thats right, you work here" . then she went on to tell me what she was looking for. She said not one thing, not, ohh you have lost weight , nothing. and yes, I have lost almost 160 pounds since she last saw me.
    She on the other hand had put some weight on, so maybe she was just uncomfortable with it??
    Maybe your family is uncomfortable with your weight loss, and doesnt know what to say to you? somepeople are like that.

    whatever the reasoning, just know that what you have done is wonderful, and you should be so proud of yourself!! dont let them bring you down, just look in the mirror and know how great your doing!
  • sboothe24
    sboothe24 Posts: 34
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    If you have any before and after pictures, post them on here. We will compliment you. 56lbs is a big change. I'm sorry the couldnt notice your hard work! We are all proud of you!
  • 44flasher44
    44flasher44 Posts: 8
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    Great for you! I have been there and had that exact thing happen to me. I was on weight watchers for about 4-5months and lost about 25lbs and I can count on one hand how many people noticed or said anything. However at one of our meetings a member brought up a good point--some people do not acknowledge your weight loss because possibly deep down they are envious of you! As long as you feel good that is all that matters but I do know that a compliment here or there makes you feel better and gives you more motivation.
  • PecanTan
    PecanTan Posts: 47
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    Hang in there, just remember there is always something in our way trying to make us turn back and head in the other direction. Don't you do it, so what if your family did not notice or maybe they did and just did not know what or how to say anything to you, whatever the case may be you have done a wonderful and hard thing. I know that you know how hard it is to lose one pound but you lost 56 girl you need to celebrate regardless if it's not with your family then the MFP family will party with you all the way till you reach your goal. Congrats and keep your head up. The MFP family is always here and we all so proud and happy for you.....
  • kwardklinck
    kwardklinck Posts: 1,601
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    Yes it happens. People don't really notice until you get close to your goal. I think it takes awhile for your body to settle in to your new size though. I usually start getting the compliments several weeks after I've lost anything. The important thing is that you're doing it in a healthy way that will last. Don't worry about what your sister is doing. I'm sure she did "something". It probably wasn't the right thing but people don't just lose 40 pounds doing "nothing".
  • Lisa0711
    Lisa0711 Posts: 1,405 Member
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    I've been there too. I lost about 35 pounds before anyone noticed. I figured 10 or 15 pounds would really stand out, but it doesn't: for some reason it just takes a while (sometimes) for people to pick up on. I know lately every 2-3 pounds I lose people notice. It seems most people just have a point where before it, others can't see the weight loss, but when you reach it people can't help but notice! Just keep it up and I'm sure everyone will be able to tell. Either way I bet you feel 100 times better than you did before!! Let that be your inspiration. You're doing great!!

    My boyfriend's mom used to complement me all the time and tell me I looked like a model and tell me how pretty I was about 50 pounds heavier. This would happen every time I saw her, and she would go on and on about it. I never, ever agreed with her at all. I didn't like the way I looked and I wasn't happy with myself. But now that I've lost 50 pounds, she never gives me compliments anymore. What's that all about? I mean I don't need her to compliment me, but I think I look a lot better now than I did then, so if it was worth mentioning then, why not now? Ya know? It makes me feel like she just wanted me to THINK I looked good and stay big forever. Oh well... who knows.. people are strange.
  • Murdog
    Murdog Posts: 70
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    First congratulations on your progress!!
    Y'know, several months ago, I was at work. There was a female co-worker here, that I thought she was doing something different and I had noticed something different about her. I wanted to compliment her on whatever it was she was doing different, because, she did look great.

    So, not really sure how to go about bringing it up to her, I just went up to her and asked " have you lost weight, or are working out? Because, whatever it is you're doing, you do look great." She replied, no...I'm not doing a thing." She smiled, and left.

    My partner in my section just shook his head and said "Jeff-Jeff... come here, man!" What are you doing?" I told him.. that,
    'well--she looked great and I wanted to compliment her on it." He told me... that I shouldn't have said anything about weight, because now, she'll probably wonder 'if I did nothing to look better... what did I look like before?" And now she'll probably feel self-concious about it. Well, after that, I felt horrible. I wanted to say something to her, but I figured I said enough, so I left it alone.

    The last thing I wanted to do was make her feel weird, I wanted to commend her. I still ticks me off that I didn't say what I ment to say, 'yknow?!
    Hopefully, she has already forgotten about it, and I'm the only one still kicking myself over it.

    Have a great day, everybody!
  • SageGoddess320
    SageGoddess320 Posts: 2,589 Member
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    I think that sometimes people do not compliment others on their weight loss (even when they DO notice) because it's like telling that person that they thought they were fat to begin with. They might just be afraid that you could take it the wrong way or your feelings could be hurt.
  • SandyRob
    SandyRob Posts: 11 Member
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    Hey, don't be discouraged!

    I had a similar experience about 10 years ago. Over a period of about 6 months, I lost 50 lbs, and very proud of myself.
    My husband (at the time), who was away alot over those 6 months, never commented on my weight loss or how much
    better I looked. It wasn't until a mutual friend of ours commented on how wonderful I looked and what was my secret, that
    he even noticed. Needless to say, the relationship didn't last....for other reasons as well, of course.

    Now I'm married to a great guy who is very supportive and encourages me when I'm trying to lose a few pounds & get
    into shape. At the same time, he tells me he loves me just the way I am! We both strive to look good for one another and
    we want to live a long & healthy life, so that we can spend as much time together as possible.

    So, chin up...if your family doesn't notice the wonderful change you've made in your life..that's their problem!
    Be proud of yourself, walk with your head held high, and be happy with your accomplishment.

    Congratulations,

    Sandy
  • MommyofLily
    MommyofLily Posts: 149 Member
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    I'm going through the same thing! I have lost over 30 lbs since Christmas and NOBODY at work has noticed and neither have my friends. The only people who have noticed are my mom and my fiance. At least someone has noticed, but they also both know how hard I've been working, and they are my best motivators and supporters. I just keep waiting for my friends and coworkers to say something, but apparently it isn't obvious yet. I even just saw a friend that I hadn't seen since I was at my all time heaviest weight and I finally said to her "I've lost like 30+ lbs since you saw me last!!!" and she just said "really??" and that was pretty much the end of the conversation...

    Anyway, I just want to say congratulations to you and I bet you look amazing! I know that losing 30 lbs has taken me a lot of hard work and determination so 56 lbs, to me, is a huge success. Good job! Stay positive, we can do this!! All that matters is how good we are feeling now compared to before. We rock! :happy:
  • MexicanStew
    MexicanStew Posts: 2 Member
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    Fifteen years ago I was 170 pounds I had lost the same amount you have. The one person that I wanted to complement me was my husband. It never happened. In the fifteen years since then I managed to gain 100 pounds. I was so miserable that the one person I needed the most seemed not to notice or care. Little did I understand that this man loved me for me. Not my body. I wish I would have known that back then. We have been married 30 years this year. Our 2 sons are grown and living their own lives, my biggest fan and supporter is my husband, the one that loves me for me. Keep up the good work. You are doing this for you, and NO ONE ELSE!
  • ComfortFoodAddict
    ComfortFoodAddict Posts: 278 Member
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    Congratulations! I am so sorry no one noticed... or if they did... shame on them for not complimenting you. I know how you feel though. I lost quite a bit of weight before and when I saw my family at Christmas time all they would say is "look who is starving herself" and "you must be off the diet cause your hips are sure spreading" I hated it because almost all of them are bigger than me! My grandmother's boyfriend is the worst... he is constantly putting me down in ways that he thinks is so funny. I hate being the butt of their jokes. Then there is my mom that talks about anytime she loses an ounce... then turns around and makes comments like "you havent had three kids, you dont have all my medical problems, and blah blah blah" she doesn't realize that everyone has their own set of road blocks to make things hard for them.... Don't we wish we could choose our family sometimes?

    I sure hope things get better for you very soon!
  • junipuni
    junipuni Posts: 264 Member
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    That sucks! Do they know you are trying to lose weight? Are you wearing clothes that fit you or clothes that are still too big? I think there could be so many reasons and I do understand how you feel.

    My sister-in-law has lost a bunch of weight this last year or so and looks fantastic. She really does, and she has worked SO hard. She deserves all the compliments and then some. But it bugs me because my MIL will talk about it all the time and never say a word about my weight loss. I haven't lost a ton of weight but I've lost about 17 inches from my body - 6 inches just from my waist. And I don't see her everyday or even every week so it should be noticeable. It is hard but you are doing great and we are very proud of you!
  • usmcwifeb15
    usmcwifeb15 Posts: 470 Member
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    I am really sorry no one noticed, I am sure you look great and it sounds like you are doing awesome. I do know how you feel not so much with family because I haven't seen them in about 4 months. I am actually going to a wedding in a month and am hoping everyone will notice a difference after losing hopefully 30lbs by then. I talke my daughters to dance once a week and they have been going since September. I have lost 23lbs since then and no one has noticed, it's kind of annoying but I just keep working at it and maybe someone will notice eventually. I notice though and in the end that's all the matters. Just keep working at it cause you are doing great!!!
  • junipuni
    junipuni Posts: 264 Member
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    if it helps any, I saw someone today who I had seen in a few years and she didnt say one word about it. I went up to her, said hello , so and so, and she just looked at me, then looked at my name tag, ( she came into the store I work at) and said, "ohhh yeah, thats right, you work here" . then she went on to tell me what she was looking for. She said not one thing, not, ohh you have lost weight , nothing. and yes, I have lost almost 160 pounds since she last saw me.
    She on the other hand had put some weight on, so maybe she was just uncomfortable with it??
    Maybe your family is uncomfortable with your weight loss, and doesnt know what to say to you? somepeople are like that.

    whatever the reasoning, just know that what you have done is wonderful, and you should be so proud of yourself!! dont let them bring you down, just look in the mirror and know how great your doing!
    With your transformation, are you sure she realized who you were???
  • CHRISSYEPSON
    CHRISSYEPSON Posts: 16
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    I am very proud of you! Keep up the good work! You must loose weight for yourself not anyone else!!!
  • nursee67
    nursee67 Posts: 503
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    I say...to hell with the people who don't notice! You are doing great...and 56 lbs is nothing to sneeze at. Keep up the great work!
  • cvtga
    cvtga Posts: 118
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    I know how frustrated you must feel, but don't let this get you down. 56lbs is a great accomplishment, and you should feel extremely proud

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