needing some boyfriend advice!

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hellraisedfire
hellraisedfire Posts: 403 Member
in Chit-Chat
so I was dating this guy for 2+ years, we recently broke up due to some uh, differences.

some info about me. I'm adopted from another country. my entire (adopted) family is pretty European, so I've been there three times (once completely alone). anyway, I've always made it clear to everyone I've talked to that I've planned to move back. Sweden, Iceland, the Netherlands, wherever will have me.

my ex was perfectly okay with this til a few months ago. where he randomly dropped the "I can't move out of this area" bomb on me. so, we broke up. it's been fine and dandy, we still talk (albeit some speed bumps, we're still friends).

fast forward: I start dating this new guy. graduation is right down the road, and EVERYONE knows I've applied to jobs/grad school out of this COUNTRY. this guy is also okay with leaving, until this week. he brings up the "can we stay in this area" bomb.

...what do I do?? :(
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Replies

  • n0ob
    n0ob Posts: 2,390 Member
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    just break up...


    MWAHAHAHAH...I got here first.

    Now on to more (hopefully) useful advice.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
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    Just break up.
  • n0ob
    n0ob Posts: 2,390 Member
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    Just break up.

    PWNT
  • Dub_D
    Dub_D Posts: 1,760 Member
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    just break up...


    MWAHAHAHAH...I got here first.

    Now on to more (hopefully) useful advice.

    tumblr_meogn1QCJC1rg2ax6o1_500.gif
  • _Elemenopee_
    _Elemenopee_ Posts: 2,665 Member
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    tumblr_meogn1QCJC1rg2ax6o1_500.gif

    This can't be happening!
  • AddieOverhaul
    AddieOverhaul Posts: 734 Member
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    Decide where you want to live, move there, and THEN find a boyfriend.
  • hellraisedfire
    hellraisedfire Posts: 403 Member
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    just break up...


    MWAHAHAHAH...I got here first.

    Now on to more (hopefully) useful advice.

    I'm begininng to think that's probably the best advice. lol.
  • MikeyD1280
    MikeyD1280 Posts: 5,257
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    just break up...


    MWAHAHAHAH...I got here first.

    Now on to more (hopefully) useful advice.

    this guy.. .is my hero... wow.. .impressive sir....

    useful advice.. let him go... but, I am sure you gave that some thought prior to dating him.
  • maqsmj
    maqsmj Posts: 697
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    some times you need to do some sacrifices for your own good, if you ask me personally i would have preferred to change the past and be with my fiance than living a hard long distant relationship, am i happy right now YES I AM, would i have been more happy? i dont know, but it is all up to you
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    just break up is the best advice..whether it came from Dani or n0ob....

    you told him your expectations...he listened, he agreed...and now he does this?

    do you really want to hang around and resent him later for it?

    you know you will.....
  • RunIntheMud
    RunIntheMud Posts: 2,645 Member
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    ...what do I do?? :(

    You're young and have a lot of life ahead of you. Go to grad school, get a good job where you want to be. Go alone. Focus on you and getting everything you want to do done. The right man will come around when the time is right.
  • hellraisedfire
    hellraisedfire Posts: 403 Member
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    it just gets to me that he knew I was planning on leaving and was "okay" with it, and now that we're emotionally invested in each other, he wants me to stay. I just wish he would've been open with it from the start. :(
  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
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    They never planned on moving in the first place, they just wanted to hit.
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    Decide where you want to live, move there, and THEN find a boyfriend.

    Bingo!
  • MikeyD1280
    MikeyD1280 Posts: 5,257
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    They never planned on moving in the first place, they just wanted to hit.

    :drinker: welcome to the "let me sleep on it" relationship...
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    They never planned on moving in the first place, they just wanted to hit.

    Wait...cancel my last Bingo. Even better.
  • dcdemocrat34
    dcdemocrat34 Posts: 33
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    The reason they were both okay with you saying you were leaving is that they A: wanted to date/sleep with you, and B: They thought they would both be so amazing that they would change your mind. DUH!

    Break Up, Move along, and get to the next one in EUROPE!
  • 31993703
    31993703 Posts: 1,144
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    it just gets to me that he knew I was planning on leaving and was "okay" with it, and now that we're emotionally invested in each other, he wants me to stay. I just wish he would've been open with it from the start. :(
    Most dudes will say anything to get in a girl's pants.
  • ChristyRunStarr
    ChristyRunStarr Posts: 1,600 Member
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    just break up...


    MWAHAHAHAH...I got here first.

    Now on to more (hopefully) useful advice.

    tumblr_meogn1QCJC1rg2ax6o1_500.gif

    I think you should use this image AND the break up advice from now on Dani.
  • greenpointmoni
    greenpointmoni Posts: 69
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    Looks like it's time to wait until you move out of the country to find a new boyfriend. No one is going to wanna move, especially if you just met them. And if they did, it probably means they are clingy.

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