No support from family or boyfriend...

You have a mother in law and a boyfriend? Confusing, but people have all kind of setups, don't worry about answering that.

Anyway, the thing to do is plan when you can - eat at home when possible, & eat beforehand if you're eating with them.

If you can't get to the gym without your mil, work out at home. If your city has bike lanes, investing in a bike could kill two birds with one stone

The other thing is to set boundaries. I'm working on this - I got suckered the other day (a friend was upset, wanted company, wanted Chinese food, wanted to share...). There's a lot to be learned from this whole process

You can't expect others to change their lifestyles *for you*, it's hard for anyone and won't work anyway unless they want to do it themselves. Use other means for support (come here!).

Hey there,

I might be off the mark but sometimes people get uncomfortable when others around them are doing things to improve their lot and it makes them feel bad that they are not getting their stuff together. I am not saying these are deliberate or conscious acts of sabotage but what is going on with them is their stuff. Misery likes company so if your bf and his mum are uncomfortable with themselves in some way and you are doing something about making yourself better you are not part of the crowd.

There are a couple of things that spring to mind that could help you with this while they sort their stuff out.

Firstly, plan your meals and snacks and prepare in advance if you have to. Make sure you are able to take something with you when you go out. I've been reading Tosca Renos books about Eating Clean and there are a lot of ideas in there. A friend of mine always has a couple of hard boiled eggs with her. For a few more calories than a piece of fruit it will fill you up for longer. A scoop or two of protein powder in a shaker to go, a small handful of almonds and an apple would fit into a bag easily enough. If your bf and mil insist on eating out when you go out and you really dont want to, what is the harm in a white lie now and again. You could say you are not that hungry, have a small portion (happy meal?) with a black coffee or tea.

Small things like these might help you feel you have retaken control and each 'victory' will strengthen you.

You don't need a driver's licence or a car to run outside
Use everyday household ware inside to do strength training (water bottles make a good sunstitute for dumbells, and sit-ups only require a floor).
If you make the choice to change, do it for yourself and don't let nobody stop you from doing it.
If you say your BF is lazy, I don't expect him to do much shopping or cooking. Take charge and shop for good wholesome healthy food, and prepare it the way you like it. If he doesn't like it, tell him to go and have fast food with the moth-in-law...

And get a driver's licence! It's freedom on a piece of paper...

you just made excuse after excuse after excuse. Quit worrying about them and worry about yourself. If your boyfriend and his family are so unsupportive then dump them! I don't get support from my boyfriend or family either. But I accept it and don't care because I am doing this for me and it has nothing to do with them

you just made excuse after excuse after excuse. Quit worrying about them and worry about yourself. If your boyfriend and his family are so unsupportive then dump them! I don't get support from my boyfriend or family either. But I accept it and don't care because I am doing this for me and it has nothing to do with them

Totally agree, Stop whining about what other people are or are not doing and just do it for yourself. The only person who can lose weight for you is you. You don't have to eat crap when you go out just try alighter option and if you can get to the gym then home workouts are just as good.

1: Keep at eating healthy until it's habit for them. Then they will be used to your choices, and start taking it for granted, and it will be harder for you NOT to eat healthy.

2: Start looking into options which means you don't have to depend on others for transport. A bike, for instance - it will both give you greater independence, and burn calories and help you get healthy. Depending of course on how many miles to the next store, but if it takes an hour by bike you get to go shopping, and you get two hours of great cardio, and a chance to buy healthy food you can cook for yourself.

3: Learn to cook well and healthy. Modern pre-processed food is stuffed with sugars, salt and fat, and you don't want to eat it. The only way to avoid this is by cooking for yourself. Teach yourself about nutrition from books and websites, then start tracking down recipes, and teach yourself to cook. Once you have figured out how to make a few healthy options, you'll find your own food is both better for you and tastes better than junk-food, and it's a LOT easier to lose weight. Of course you may end up cooking for everybody, but then you can ask them to help you with the shopping. It's much easier to ask for help when you are already making a good and healthy contribution.

4: When the others see that your efforts are beneficial to them, it will be a lot easier for them to be supportive, and this will become a win-win situation for all of you.

Good luck!

How can you have a mother in law and a boyfriend at the same time? Does your husband mind?

When you go out with her pack your food before you go. It might feel weird and she might give you crap for it but if you pack yourself healthy snacks, salads, chicken, some nuts, fruits, cheeses, whatever you like that makes you feel good and keeps you full and fits your monetary and caloric budget. Pack a lunch with you and eat that and let her eat whatever fast food she wants. Or, if you have to eat the fast food get the kid's meal or the smallest sizes of whatever you want. You can learn to be satisfied with less and on those days do some extra cardio to balance it out.

Also, stop wanting to change her habits. You can try to suggest things to her but until she's ready to change her eating habits and start exercising she's not going to change and you can't make her and trying to will just upset you both.

Hang in there. You need to do what is comfortable for you. No one else has to live inside you. Just remember you are not alone in this. You have support and people who understand. Don't let anyone tell you what you need to do. You can do it. Just be strong. Once they realize you are your own person, they might back off. Just be strong. You can do it.

Sound like a big paragraph of excuses to me step it up if you want this enough you can do it nobody eats heathy around me they eat like kids with sweets and crips and take aways!

Exactly! I am in the same situation.... my entire family and my boyfriend eats crap. I made the decision for MYSELF to not order something when he pulls through the drive-through, to stop drinking soda even though it's around, to make dinner myself if they were ordering out pizza. You can only blame yourself, to be honest. People are going to eat what they want and you should allow yourself that same priority. Even if you can't drive, you can always walk or bike to the grocery store to buy food. I did this at my old house when I was in high school and my family didn't want to "spend tons of money on healthy food." I rode my bike the 3 miles and back to the grocery store and bought my own food. I used to be really good at making excuses until I realized it wasn't doing me any good. You're an adult and it sounds like you're ready to make good decisions, you just don't know how to execute it yet. But it sounds like you've done good work sofar! 15 pounds is great.

this is about you and when it comes to u, don't rely on anyone but u. F your boytoy. He apparently isn't Mr right because if u ended up married to him you would get pregnant right? Pregnancy always causes weight gain. I had to lose 65 pounds 8 years ago so there u go..... He really doesn't sound to mature-

What the what? This makes absolutely zero sense. Just because two people get married doesn't mean they're automatically going to have a kid, and not everyone gains weight during pregnancy.

Stop making excuses and make better choices. No one is forcing you to eat badly. You can go for a walk or do an exercise DVD at home. It's up to you. You cannot make someone support you.