Your slim friends telling you, you look good.....

Some people are like this, it is true, but if it is someone that you are really good friends with they probably just think you are beautiful the way you are.

Just wait until you really start seeing a difference- those same friends will tell you that you are 'too skinny' or ask you if you are eating enough LOL. The first time I dropped a lot of weight and was REALLY looking good, I had that happen to me with a specific gf of mine.
But she also just might be trying to make you feel good about yourself. I know my friend never really thought I could lose the weight and always told me I looked 'fine'.
I didnt want to look fine, I wanted to look FIIIIIIIIINE!!! LOL
Good luck hon, add me as a friend if you want to!!

Just wait until you really start seeing a difference- those same friends will tell you that you are 'too skinny' or ask you if you are eating enough LOL. The first time I dropped a lot of weight and was REALLY looking good, I had that happen to me with a specific gf of mine.
But she also just might be trying to make you feel good about yourself. I know my friend never really thought I could lose the weight and always told me I looked 'fine'.
I didnt want to look fine, I wanted to look FIIIIIIIIINE!!! LOL
Good luck hon, add me as a friend if you want to!!

This this this! Exactly the same! Even though I was still twice the size as them, the "you're too skinny." Right. Ok.

I've had that, too. Made me mad on the inside. It's either they are feeling bad for us or feel that if we do lose weight we will be better than them. True?

I think that's why I never take a compliment or believe anyone or in fact know why I "really" look like. When I was obese and thoroughly in denial, I was apparently "absolutely fine".

My chaffed thighs and stretch marks said otherwise!!!!

Can I add a perspective from 'the other side'? I'm small, I admit it, I'm not trying to loose weight I'm trying to be healthy because I'm marathon training. I have friends who are larger than me, some of them are classed as overweight, some are obese and others are just being silly. But if my overweight friends say something about being fat I will tell them they are not fat, simply to try and raise their self esteem, I hate seeing my friends upset about their weight. I tell them they're not fat but if they're actually trying to loose weight I will try and give some helpful advice. I'd never turn round to them and say 'Yeah, you're so fat. You better get jogging...' IMAGINE if I said that to my friends, I would have none left!

Your slim friends probably just don't know how to react, they probably feel bad that they don't have to work at being slim and you do. They're probably trying to help but not quite getting it

This is so true. Have some skinny friends who do the same and I can't work out whether they have body dysmorphia or feel a bit threatened!

Just to throw in another perspective - weight is a very touchy subject and no matter what, no one response is going to be "right". To agree with a person who says they need to lose weight can cause problems; to disagree can cause problems. People have to just judge and answer with the best response they can come up with. It's really not fair to put people in this situation or to judge them for their reactions.

Instead of thinking your friends are lying or out to make you fail (and they probably aren't if they are true friends), don't bring the issue up. My best friend is about a size 2 and one day we were with a group of other family/friends and someone started talking about how noticeable it was that I'd lost weight, and how much had I lost, etc, etc. Later my very good friend apologized because she said that she had honestly never noticed or paid attention. That was fine by me. I never bring attention to my weight or my need to lose weight because 1)it's fairly obvious to anyone who cares to notice and 2)if they don't care to notice, then they don't care because it's not important to my relationship with them.

If someone notices that I've lost weight, I admit that I have and that I'm just trying to watch what I'm eating. I'll recommend MFP if I think they would appreciate it and that's the end of the discussion.

This gets on my &*@+*#% NERVES for some reason. I have a slim friend who I always go out with. She's cool, I love her, but she ALWAYS tells me "you look fine, you don't need to lose weight".

I secretly feel that she doesn't want me to be as slim, or slimmer then her.

Does anyone else have friends that make them feel that way?

Can you just ask her not to say that to you anymore because of how it makes you feel? People try to be helpful, but she's probably just oblivious as to what she's doing. Real friends usually have the best intentions.

Can I add a perspective from 'the other side'? I'm small, I admit it, I'm not trying to loose weight I'm trying to be healthy because I'm marathon training. I have friends who are larger than me, some of them are classed as overweight, some are obese and others are just being silly. But if my overweight friends say something about being fat I will tell them they are not fat, simply to try and raise their self esteem, I hate seeing my friends upset about their weight. I tell them they're not fat but if they're actually trying to loose weight I will try and give some helpful advice. I'd never turn round to them and say 'Yeah, you're so fat. You better get jogging...' IMAGINE if I said that to my friends, I would have none left!

THIS (Well said!) - I have 19 kilos to lose so by no means am I skinny right now. I think if they are a good friend, theyr'e saying things with the best intentions. I get the" You don't have to lose weight from my lovely friends, I am tall and do hide the weight a bit but at the end of the day I know what's best for me, I know my happy weight and I gotta do what I gotta do!

I know this problem well, when I lost over a some a few years back relatively quickly and everyone who knew me before said I was too thin even though I was only a UK size 10 with around 28% body fat. The people who said it were either overweight and jealous or thin and not happy I was catching up!

Recently I moaned to a naturally skinny friend who does no exercise about my weight and she kept telling me I had the perfect body with no body fat which is quite clearly not true! It makes me more self-conscious about stripping of at the beach now, I'd rather people were honest and especially people like her who really are thin. We've been out recently to places where we've had group photos and I can barely look at myself in them I look so much bigger than her.

I always make a point of acknowledging that people who are trying to get fit or lose weight are doing so 'cos they need it.

I think the whole weight thing can make people feel uncomfortable. If someone overweight says something like "oh, I'm going to pass on the beer because I'm trying to loose weight", it could make those around them uncomfortable and likely to say something like "oh, you're fine". I don't think they're doing it to be mean or sabotage your goals. It's just that people often feel like they have to respond and saying "yeah, you probably should lay off the beer", they say something they perceive as nice.

They might be annoyed that their overweight friends keep talking about their weight loss and it makes them uncomfortable, lol

I have been watching my weight for a long time. My co-workers know my struggles. I also have hypothyroidism and can't seem to get below 150...and I'm 5'2! So, my "friend" lost about 60 pounds. I was telling her how good she looked. She turned to me and offered me her clothes that no longer fit her. I wasn't as big as her when she began her journey, and don't have much to go...30 pounds. I took a deep breath and said, sure! She never brought them in. I think she realized her mistake in hindsight.