Your support/relationship

inb4 "just break up"


Really though, if he's being a detriment on purpose, you may want to consider some relationship changes. More on topic though, I don't have anybody other than some awesome MFP friends to motivate me. That's all I need, really.

My hubs is supportive -- but I've had to go back to doing all my own cooking.

that doesn't sound very helpful if someone is against you bettering yourself...

My missus is semi supportive. In my goals, certainly but doesn't want to be part of the process, but that's ok.

For you, it sounds like you need someone in your like that cares about you, regardless of your healthy/fitness goals.

He is sort of supportive, but forgets sometimes. I am losing weight I put on recently. I did a big hike today and was wriggling into my waterproof trousers that I haven't worn in a while. He said "oh dear, have they shrunk?". While in hitting distance. After I smacked him, he went out and bought me flowers :-). Just remember, boys can be rubbish because they are boys, regardless of their age according to their birth certificate. If they are unsupportive, you have to take control. Do all the food planning and cooking and they will eat what they are given. He laughed once when I was weighing something. My response was it is weighed dinner or no dinner. He shut up. In return, he is getting first dibs on what to watch on television.

Your significant other. Do they help you in any way? Are they doing this with you? Or are you on your on with your diet and fitness goals?
I am feeling alone in this...My boyfriend doesn't respect my choices, nor does he intend on changing any of his. He doesn't care that I want to eat better, or try helping me achieve my goals. Our relationship is honestly plumetting since I started the idea of bettering myself.

Guess I'm just wondering how other people's support is...:-)

My boyfriend is just like this! The other day he told me "Do I look like I need to lose weight? Then don't put me on your diet."
He used to be very overweight; I have no idea how he lost it. He doesn't talk about it with me and it was before I met him.

I try to explain to him that it's about getting fruits and vegetables and things that are good for you instead of living off a bacon double cheeseburger and 5 liters of Pepsi every day. Even though he's skinny now, he's clearly unhealthy, never works out, and plays video games all day. It's especially tiring because I usually have to cook two completely different meals and grocery shop from two lists. He's also really picky.

I'm trying but it's wearing on me. Unfortunately I think this relationship is coming to it's natural end. I just can't see myself marrying someone who doesn't give a whit about their health. It sounds cold, but I'm not going to marry someone who will be a financial burden on me in 10-15 years with health problems, high insurance cost, and lowered life expectancy. I can't live my life with someone who doesn't share my values of health and activity.

My boyfriend was mostly supportive in the beginning, but not at all on board with me. They are different things. Supportive means not being mean about the choices I'm making and respecting my wishes to reduce eating out/bringing in massive amounts of candy in the home. I've had to compromise on those more than a few times to keep the peace, but overall, he is at least willing to let me be about it.

He has not changed the way he eats. He made a few stabs at exercising with me but fell out of doing that. This doesn't mean he doesn't support me - he's just not on board with me. That's okay. My body, my choice. His body, his choice. If I waited for him to do it with me, I could be waiting for forever. I'm worth more than to wait for that.

Awesome husband who is encouraging better eating and fitness for both of us, even though he doesn't need to lose weight and is a post-doc with no time! He told me that when you love someone, what's important to them has to become important to you too (within reason). We support each other on important stuff, even if it's not really our thing, as well as sharing some interests, and pursuing separate interests too. Talk to him directly about very specific forms of support you need (the more specific the better!), and that you're worried that you're drifting apart. Ask him too for ideas on how to support you, and how you can support him, and how the two of you can strengthen your relationship. If he's unwilling, sadly you'll need to leave him behind so you can be your best self.

x

My SO is supportive.. but he does set up sabotage along the way

This. He is supportive and tells me when I'm doing well but does thing like eat pizzas in front of me and offer me some. I find that very hard.

my hubby has been really supportive in giving me the time to go running and training- i work shifts and have 3 young kids, so it's pretty spectacular that he's been willing to give up some of his time to let me have it! as far as diet goes, not so much. but that's ok. i've learned to take smaller portions of what he cooks and fill my plate with salad! and just because he has chips and lollies doesn't mean i have to eat them. sometimes i do, because i am weak. but most of the time i don't. but he gets the rewards too because i'm so much happier and feel better about myself, which in turn makes his life a lot easier because i'm less grumpsome. so my fitness is in his best interests!

ETA: he does NOT do this with me. but he's a pretty good cheerleader.

He's my biggest support - or my biggest enabler... depending on the day.
LOL

My boyfriend has been great... he is already is great shape, but doing all my workouts with me. When I lag he tells don't stop! keep going! but manages to do so without me wanting to punch him in the face at first, he was a little judgy with my food choices ... but I've made it clear I want to eat healthily and get fit, not live off lettuce and water... yes I will occasionally say 'I'm hungry, I'm going to eat a <whatever>' He's being much more supportive now.

My wife and I both are doing this. It's a "we're doing this for us because we're kinda awesome and wanna be around longer together" type thing.

If your boyfriend isn't supporting you, then you don't have to worry about doing this for him... just do it for you. If he doesn't wanna stick around for the ride with a healthier, happier girlfriend, that's his loss.

Besides, at the end of the day, it boils down to you making yourself more awesome... for YOU, not him.

I totally agree with this because you have to do it for you and not anyone else. You are worth it!

His goals and my goals are totally different. He eats different and treats his body different. And to be honest since his priorities aren't quite aligned I've had to change my eating habits a bit to work around our dinners. But I'd not change that.

As far as being "supportive" I really don't require that support. If he ever wanted to change his ways of eating and work out more, I'd be totally on board.

What you need to realize is what you are doing is for YOU. Don't ever do it for anybody else.

I feel pretty blessed to have my bf! He'll go to the gym with me and even went to my yoga class! He isn't nearly as motivated as me to make major changes but he is supportive. He will eat the healthy food I make but if no one (i.e me or his mom) cooks anything then he'll just eat cereal all day long. One of our favorite activities is hiking and backpacking so he is more than happy to see me in shape for our next adventure and he always tells me I'm pretty. =D